― Mike Hanle y (mike), Monday, 25 November 2002 06:45 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Ashley Andel, Monday, 25 November 2002 06:58 (twenty-one years ago) link
― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 25 November 2002 06:59 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Ashley Andel, Monday, 25 November 2002 07:10 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Chupa-Cabras (vicc13), Monday, 25 November 2002 07:17 (twenty-one years ago) link
― dave q, Monday, 25 November 2002 07:25 (twenty-one years ago) link
Well, OF COURSE NOT, if you're gonna name a thread "My father has a hard on and it won't go away"
― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 25 November 2002 07:26 (twenty-one years ago) link
i have no advice, unfortunately. i'm not a doctor.
― Tad (llamasfur), Monday, 25 November 2002 07:29 (twenty-one years ago) link
― ron (ron), Monday, 25 November 2002 07:32 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Dan I., Monday, 25 November 2002 07:53 (twenty-one years ago) link
for treatment of early priapism (6 hours or less), you could use a cheap decongestant that contains pseudoephedrine (like Sudafed, in North America). but if this has been going on for 72 hours, it's critically important to drain the blood and let the penis detumesce. the loss of blood flow to the penis for that long can lead to serious complications, from fibrosis of the blood vessels (producing impotence) to loss of the penile tissue from ischemic necrosis. that's why they need the fat syringes.
it's hard for me to believe that the doctors aren't taking your father's condition seriously. priapism requires urgent care, especially if it's, uh, long-standing, as in your father's case. but at least they're draining the blood, which is what they should be doing.
you wrote that your father has a "priapism condition". do you mean by this that he's had this happen before? if he hasn't already, he really will need to have this investigated. all sorts of things can cause priapism, including certain drugs (including marijuana, so scratch that idea too) or medications, blood clotting disorders (like sickle-cell anemia), and obstructions of venous drainage of the penis (which may be a sign of cancer). even so, many cases of priapism are called "idiopathic", which just means the doctors don't know what's happening.
i hope your father comes out of this ok.
― doctor love hewitt (doctor love hewitt), Monday, 25 November 2002 08:19 (twenty-one years ago) link
[/montypython]
― doctor love hewitt (doctor love hewitt), Monday, 25 November 2002 08:27 (twenty-one years ago) link
― V, Monday, 25 November 2002 08:58 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Dan I., Monday, 25 November 2002 15:49 (twenty-one years ago) link
The doctors don't seem to take his pain seriously, that is they don't give him any sort of pain-killer, besides some sort of freezing agent on it during draining.
― Ashley Andel, Monday, 25 November 2002 22:14 (twenty-one years ago) link
― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 25 November 2002 22:26 (twenty-one years ago) link
― rat, Monday, 25 November 2002 22:31 (twenty-one years ago) link
oh, and can i have the photo?
― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 25 November 2002 22:40 (twenty-one years ago) link
― rat, Monday, 25 November 2002 22:52 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Prude, Monday, 25 November 2002 23:14 (twenty-one years ago) link
― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 25 November 2002 23:59 (twenty-one years ago) link
― Prude (Prude), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 04:08 (twenty years ago) link
― Dada, Wednesday, 13 August 2003 04:21 (twenty years ago) link
― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 04:40 (twenty years ago) link
― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 12:59 (twenty years ago) link
― dave q, Wednesday, 13 August 2003 13:07 (twenty years ago) link
― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 13:14 (twenty years ago) link
― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 13:16 (twenty years ago) link
They did that to me to, dq. I haven't been on them for years, but I've considered going on them again just for the semi-tantric effect.
― J (Jay), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 13:25 (twenty years ago) link
― Skottie, Wednesday, 18 February 2004 19:29 (twenty years ago) link
"the shrink"
― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 20:49 (twenty years ago) link
― the angry cowboy (dick), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 20:54 (twenty years ago) link
― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 21:03 (twenty years ago) link
obviously.
― the angry cowboy (dick), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 21:09 (twenty years ago) link
― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 21:11 (twenty years ago) link
something is definitely wrong with this picture, unless of course it's just for shits and giggles, in which case, something is definitely still wrong with this picture.
― the angry cowboy (dick), Wednesday, 18 February 2004 21:20 (twenty years ago) link
― the surface noise (electricsound), Thursday, 19 February 2004 01:37 (twenty years ago) link
― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 19 February 2004 01:54 (twenty years ago) link
― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 19 February 2004 01:54 (twenty years ago) link
huh?
― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 19 February 2004 02:04 (twenty years ago) link
― Shep, Thursday, 19 February 2004 02:44 (twenty years ago) link
― Skottie, Thursday, 19 February 2004 05:39 (twenty years ago) link
― Skottie, Thursday, 19 February 2004 05:40 (twenty years ago) link
― Prude (Prude), Thursday, 19 February 2004 07:45 (twenty years ago) link
"couldn't you just f*** it until he spoofed, and that would be the remedy?"
It's a genuine query, she's quite serious. Any experts out there?
― the music mole (colin s barrow), Thursday, 19 February 2004 07:55 (twenty years ago) link
― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Thursday, 19 February 2004 10:11 (twenty years ago) link
Each time I read the thread title, I hear Morrissey singing it.
― the music mole (colin s barrow), Thursday, 19 February 2004 10:12 (twenty years ago) link
― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 19 February 2004 14:10 (twenty years ago) link
still the funniest thread ever
― Zeno, Thursday, 8 November 2007 12:52 (sixteen years ago) link
-- the music mole (colin s barrow), Thursday, February 19, 2004 11:12 AM (3 years ago) Bookmark Link
ROFL
― StanM, Thursday, 8 November 2007 13:02 (sixteen years ago) link
Hi My father very root with me what can I do?
― Just got offed, Thursday, 8 November 2007 13:12 (sixteen years ago) link
http://www.b3tards.com/u/c2d08cf4e23cfbd9a0c0/duck_hunt_dog.gif
― macaulay culkin's bukkake shocker (bug), Monday, 18 May 2009 07:40 (fifteen years ago) link
― the music mole (colin s barrow), Thursday, February 19, 2004 5:12 AM (6 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
lol
― hongthrone: norsk arisk synth pop (crüt), Wednesday, 18 August 2010 19:52 (thirteen years ago) link
Poor Ashley, I wonder if her dad was okay in the end.
― Proger, Monday, 30 May 2011 05:32 (thirteen years ago) link
Morrisey may well have understood the problemhttp://www.slicingupeyeballs.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/morrisseyandband.jpg
― Proger, Monday, 30 May 2011 05:36 (thirteen years ago) link
Did Jim ever get his Kelly pic?
― The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Monday, 30 May 2011 10:58 (thirteen years ago) link
Each time I read the thread title, I hear Kelly Osbourne singing it.
― Hippocratic Oaf (DavidM), Monday, 30 May 2011 11:13 (thirteen years ago) link
no pic :(
― swagenda (electricsound), Monday, 30 May 2011 11:58 (thirteen years ago) link
BLOOD SAUSAGE
keep the meme alive
― the fiest p (onimo), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 17:34 (eight years ago) link
Which of these scenarios is more disturbing?
Ashley's father: Hey, Ashley. (takes out penis) Does this look normal? It's been like this for 72 hours.Ashley: (looks at father's penis) No, dad, I don't think that's normal. It's purple and hanging off of you like a blood sausage.
or
Ashley: (looks at father's penis periodically over the course of 72 hours) Dad, I couldn't help but notice that you've had an erection for the past 72 hours, and now it's purple and hanging off of you like a blood sausage.
― Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 17:49 (eight years ago) link
http://ashleyandel.tumblr.com/ask
― welltris (crüt), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 17:52 (eight years ago) link
quoting this one more time. well done.
― mizzell, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 17:59 (eight years ago) link
My Dad used to have his yearly day in the bathroom, where he would set up camp with a few towels, some scissors and a bottle of Nair. He would emerge all grey and pink-stubbly, like a plucked stork. Apparently, he did this because he was sick of having to take a shower after every bowel movement.
― Ashley Andel, Wednesday, October 30, 2002 2:11 AM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― drash, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:03 (eight years ago) link
I imagine that it was some Muzak or something, as I was conceived in a hospital bed (my Dad's--apparently he had tubes hanging out from every which way and everybody thought he was going to die, incl. my mother, who took the opportunity to get in "one last time"...).
― Ashley Andel, Monday, November 4, 2002 10:38 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― drash, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:04 (eight years ago) link
I am serious--my Mom only screwed my Dad because she thought he looked like Rod Stewart, ergo I owe my existence to the man. Do you owe your life to anybody?
― Ashley Andel, Sunday, November 3, 2002 9:35 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Consider the possibility of using technology (i.e. TOP SECRET technology) to stage the Second Coming of Christ. What if the next terrorist attack is more psychological? What if all of the sudden on September 11, the fucking sky turns an ominous hue and a gigantic silver Messiah appears at Ground Zero? Imagine that a NEW PERFECT AMERICA appears and all the sodomites spontaneously burst into tossing flames because some higher power implanted shit in them? We undoubtedly have the technology to do so... Let's imagine how obsolete the mass population can be, shall we?
― Ashley Andel, Friday, September 6, 2002 9:26 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― drash, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:05 (eight years ago) link
I was recently approached by a very well-to-do thirty-something year old woman who offered me an undisclosed but large amount of money to favor her sexually. I have a girlfriend who desperately wants an oboe, and those things are really expensive. If I was to accept the offer, I would be able to buy her one. I have talked to my girlfriend about this situation, and she is firmly against it, even though she knows of my intentions for the money. What should I do?
― Ashley Andel, Tuesday, August 27, 2002 12:54 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Concentrate on the parts of yourself that you are afraid or even unwilling to venture into. Just a quick suggestion...
― Ashley Andel, Thursday, October 10, 2002 9:58 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― drash, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:07 (eight years ago) link
Is Momus destroying my hearing?I like his stuff, but it hurts to listen to it for over fifteen min.!
― Ashley Andel, Friday, August 23, 2002 8:19 PM (13 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― mizzell, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 17:59 (10 minutes ago) Permalink
It's also a sentence I can add to my list of lines that fit the verse melody of Head Over Heels
― on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:11 (eight years ago) link
http://www.youtube.com/user/ashleyandel
― drash, Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:17 (eight years ago) link
One can also sing the thread title to the tune of "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy Of Company B". FYI.
― Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:23 (eight years ago) link
My father has a hard on and it won't go away
^ I'm sure that was the name of a Swans album.
― gabba cadaver (NickB), Tuesday, 10 November 2015 18:30 (eight years ago) link
Coming up for November and nearly 18 years since that dreadful 72 hours.
― Proger, Tuesday, 20 October 2020 05:16 (three years ago) link
also blood sausage is delicious
― eat my room temperature ass (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 15:33 (three years ago) link
― superdeep borehole (harbl), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 17:38 (three years ago) link
Hi My father's root very root with him what can he do?
― OrificeMax (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 18:08 (three years ago) link
I was thinking about “my father very root with me” the other week. Back in the day the reaction was this was something to laugh at, but thinking about it in 2020 it was probably some poor kid who couldn’t speak English as their first language being sexually abused.
Sorry for downer
― I am using your worlds, Tuesday, 20 October 2020 18:21 (three years ago) link
not sure how you are assuming this yahoo answers person is being sexually abused but ok
― superdeep borehole (harbl), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 18:27 (three years ago) link
yeah i'm sure someone who posted that their father was very 'root' with them in the Home and Garden section was really secretly reporting thier sexual assault and not taking a bit of piss
― eat my room temperature ass (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 19:13 (three years ago) link
https://i.imgur.com/jDcFLkj.jpg
― the burrito that defined a generation, Tuesday, 20 October 2020 19:27 (three years ago) link
a family tree with strong roots
― the burrito that defined a generation, Tuesday, 20 October 2020 19:28 (three years ago) link
a poor kid who couldn't speak English but did know Australian slang
― here comes the hotstamper (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 19:29 (three years ago) link
Admit when I remembered it I hadn't realised it was originally posted in the home and garden section so I guess IDK what the intention was behind it
― I am using your worlds, Tuesday, 20 October 2020 19:47 (three years ago) link
One day we will get to the root of the matter
― shout-out to his family (DJP), Tuesday, 20 October 2020 20:06 (three years ago) link