NOEL COWARD is Striding Down K-Street DC MCMXL The Centre for Professional Alcoholics

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (4977 of them)

well there's eatin' bacon and then there's... no, no, fuck you, i will not defile something as PURE and as WONDERFUL as bacon.

― chicago kevin, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:50 (seventeen years ago) link

i don't have a single adorable parent story, how depressing

― ghost rider, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:53 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.dropline.net/cats/images/thriller%20cats.jpg

― Mr. Que, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:53 (seventeen years ago) link

hey everyone i need to start showing up to work "on time" apparently

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 19:53 (seventeen years ago) link

marky that sebadoh song and many of those butterglory song are pretty awes!

WTF u get called out ally??

― 69, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:54 (seventeen years ago) link

it's getting to the point where i feel like i should be finding jobs for you ally

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:55 (seventeen years ago) link

i had my review in which it was revealed that my territory is 6% over goal/18% over last year and also glowing praise blah blah blah blah blah about being a consummate team player and always happy to basically give up everything ever in the world to back up jackasses and so on and so forth BUT since i show up 15 minutes late pretty regularly due to ABSOLUTELY HATING THIS PLACE AND EVERYONE IN IT i kind of only qualify as "meets standards" and do not "exceed standards"

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 19:56 (seventeen years ago) link

my territory is 6% over goal/18% over last year

i'd like to point out that they are talking about MY territory only, not the OTHER THREE I HAVE BEEN WORKING AND KEEPING AT STOCK EVEN FOR THE MAJORITY OF THE PAST 5 MONTHS. which is written, right here, in this review!!!

but still i only meet standards and you know that means i wouldn't get anything from this review.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 19:57 (seventeen years ago) link

i take back what i said about not killing people

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:58 (seventeen years ago) link

because if i demoralized myself even more and rushed in here on time instead of just saying fuck it, getting coffee and a smoke first, maybe we'd be like 7% over goal because GOD FORBID ANYONE ELSE DO ANYTHING.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 19:58 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh Jesus Christ.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:59 (seventeen years ago) link

i guess the reason why i am in this industry to begin with is that i took this all laughing and smiling and being ultimate #1 bro the entire time, only making one (1) sarcastic and nasty comment about anyone.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 19:59 (seventeen years ago) link

ok that sentence didn't entirely make sense

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:00 (seventeen years ago) link

i'm getting down on myself for basically having no marketable skills whatsoever besides being a big huge phony, sorry :\

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:00 (seventeen years ago) link

i don't have marketable skills, either, it's ok

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

high fives

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:01 (seventeen years ago) link

i really need to find a way to turn "being chatty" into a marketable skill

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

oh hey are you guys talking about having no marketable skills

― ghost rider, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

yes we are ghost rider, come and join us!

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:02 (seventeen years ago) link

i was an english major haha!

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

being a big chatty liar is my marketable skill, the circle comes back to full yet again

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

I determined (in a conversation with a professor, no less!) that my only marketable skill is "being pleasant." if you are a chick, that conversation turns awkward real quick.

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:03 (seventeen years ago) link

The Flying Dawkins: a place for big chatty liars

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

i'm not even pleasant :/

― ghost rider, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

the schef, please go tell adorable parent factoids on the relevant thread!

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:04 (seventeen years ago) link

that's okay, Alex, you're a boy, being pleasant will get you nowhere.

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

my marketability rests solely on being cute (according to my boss I "have the motor skills of a small child"): this will get me through my thesis, and then I am doomed.

― jessie monster, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

sometimes you are pleasant. beartrap

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:05 (seventeen years ago) link

oh, Jessie, I'm not sure what your thesis is in, but I'm in grad school and cute is a double-edged sword (if you're a chick.)

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

yay for Ally's mom!

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:06 (seventeen years ago) link

hi why am I so bitter today. sorry guys. you are all pleasant and lovely.

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

hahahaha you've never met us

― pretzel walrus, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:07 (seventeen years ago) link

I feel confident

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

dude, being a woman in ~~life~~ (grad) school is a double-edged sword. :/

― jessie monster, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

every job i've ever had was basically me being hired to flirt with people and manipulate them. i'm having kind of a crisis here i think.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

"pleasant"

― Mr. Que, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m64/eljeffebonanza/WORK.jpg

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm distinctly unpleasant at work and/or when annoyed or impatient, but I do get things done. My marketable skills all involve manufacturing & production and asking vendors whether their pressmen were fucking sleeping when they printed my books, though.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Jessie, I would like to subscribe to your newsletter!

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

WHY AREN'T YOU A BARTENDER, SERIOUSLY

BEARTRAPPIN THE SCHEF

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:09 (seventeen years ago) link

i should probably just become a bartender really

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

i'd be happier

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

tho these jerkwads here would glue themselves to my bar in hopes of getting free drinks and i'd never make any money ;_;

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

honestly, this whole "med school" business aside, the one thing i've really wanted to do was open up a bar/hostel/whatever in silverton, colorado.

also it would be a record label

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

tho i wouldn't need any money cos i could just steal drinks and smokes from the bar!!! :D

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 9 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Ally, sweetheart, I hear you. Take ten deep breaths. You are Allyzay, Adventuress and High Spirit Extraordinaire.

Beat rep: Bartending: you'll make hella money but your customers will all be douchebags who will check out yr T&A 94/7. Okay with that? Y/N

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

wait let's take a moment out of this pity party to lol at fluffy bear

― ghost rider, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

"jerkwads"

― Mr. Que, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:11 (seventeen years ago) link

agreed: lol, fluffy bear, kudos

― river wolf, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

I think what Ally is saying is the only difference between that and her current job is hella money?

― horseshoe, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:12 (seventeen years ago) link

Skipping 4877 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.