Notate your favorite sandwhich thusly:

Bits of lobster that manage to be both squishy and textureless, floating in Hellman's, pasting a hot dog bun together so that it makes that velcro-cunt sound if you pry it open.

Now you aren't hungry.

Also, Tep, I reallllllly hate you.

http://www.quartzcity.net/albums/album06/IMG_1076.sized.jpg

(xpost; I mean, it's a nice sounding sandwich, though, cozen. I'm not sure what Scotch pie is, though.)

http://www.winarms.com/images/menuscotchmeatpie.jpg

(this is with moderate safesearch on, obv.)

recipe.

Well.

Cuban-type sandwich thing (which I think is all here:

Cuban, Italian, or French bread (not baguette)
Gulden's mustard
Citrus-y cucumber pickles (which I've been calling mojo pickles, cause it's kinda like mojo)
Sopressa salami
Mortadella
Brown sugar citrus pork loin
Thinly-sliced pepperoncini
Lime-serrano mayonnaise
Bread again

Grilled/pressed

*

New Orleans variation of the Cuban:

Same bread
Tomato gravy from a braised roast beef (like pot roast with lots of tomato and spice)
Shredded roast beef
Lots of Tabasco sauce
Hot French fries
Bread

Grilled/pressed

top part of bun
microwaveable bean'n'cheese burrito (removed from wrapper, preferably)
nacho chips
hot chili paste
bottom part of the bun

My drinkin days:

Top half of hamburger bun
Cheese. What kind? Melted, that's what kind.
Chili.
Fried egg, over medium.
Hamburger, medium-rare.
Bottom half of hamburger bun.

*

My legitimate favorite sandwich for probably three years:

Toasted white bread (I always used Pepperidge Farm sandwich bread)
Thin slice of cheddar, sometimes
Creole mustard, like Zatarain's
Lots of Tabasco sauce or Louisiana-brand cayenne sauce, and enough salt that you know it's salted.
Fried egg, over medium
Toasted white bread

or alternately (if not at Jewish deli and not worried about having a heart attack)

Sesame bun top
Thousand Island dressing
Tomato
Onion
Pickels
Lettuce
Fried egg (for fried egg love)
Hickory smoked bacon
American cheese
1/3lb hamburger patty
More thousand island dressing
Bun botton

I give you..the king;

bread
cheese
marmite
bread

and we're done

See, that was the nature of my sandwich experiment, to play with sandwiches that do exactly those things. Besides: between New England, with its steak bombs and meatball grinders, and New Orleans, where fried seafood poboys are easier to find than hot dogs or cold cuts, I think sandwich culture has pretty well established its friendliness to more time-consuming preparations.

Also:
Bread
Peanut Butter
Lettuce
Tomato
Bacon
Bread

FINIS

It really is good.

go ahead and ask me if i did this

Thick brown wholemeal slice (w/ weird hippy nut an' shit)
Black-olive pesto
Cheese slice
Beef burger
Bacon rasher
Cheese slice
Beef burger
Bacon rasher
Black-olive pesto
Thick brown wholemeal slice.

It was very possibly the highlight of my entire life. I think I might be sick.