Rolling UK Pop/Chart/"Few people would dispute that Elbow have given us the album of the year" Thread 2009

A chart system where new entries are becoming increasingly rarer, in a country where the economy is officially hitting the skids. The question of whether the top 40 still matters is a question that's been asked for goodness knows how long now, but at the start of this year it feels especially pertinent.

At present, things look like this:

1 ALEXANDRA BURKE - HALLELUJAH

She's a good old voice on her, and her personality seems to have a bit more bite than Leona's. Pretty certain she's got some great records in her, not sure this is one of them. It is not a new or challenging reading that suggests the main theme here is Simon Cowell Can Buy You, but it's still the main vibe I'm picking up. Amidst my happiness at Laughin Len getting in the top 40, I did wonder if he would honestly give a shit.

2 LEONA LEWIS - RUN

And where now for Leona? Nicely arranged ballads are what people like hearing her sing, they have decided. Can she break out of said mould? Does she want to? The failure of Leon Jackson meant she effectively got an additional year as X Factor winner, the public emblem of the programme's success. Alexandra's victory, however, means she's got a bit more of a challenge this year: trying to forge an identity that doesn't have so much to do with the programme. One could argue that her two US hit singles (an unprecedented level of success for a UK TV pop artist) mean she's already done that, but I ain't so sure.

3 BEYONCE - IF I WERE A BOY

No such worries here, of course. Her album has still not charted above number eight in the UK, but it doesn't matter - as her duet with Alexandra on the X Factor final amply demonstrated, the world is in awe of her to an extent that pretty much no other pop star at present can match. The secret being, of course, that everyone else has to try - with yr Timberlakes and Madonnas and Ushers and so on, there's always the feeling that they have something to prove, they need to convince people that they're relevant, they're in touch; Beyonce just turns up and is Beyonce, and that's plenty.

4 JAMES MORRISON/NELLY FURTADO - Broken Strings

Probably the most interesting thing that happened to this feller last year was when, for no immediately obvious reason, Akon covered one of his songs during an appearance on the Live Lounge. Now he gets to duet with Nelly Furtado, albeit that she's not co-promoting the single with him... something's going on here. Given his previous track record, it won't result in any records that are worth giving a shit about, but it might well result in a bunch of things like this one clogging up the higher reaches of the charts and the radio and the so forth, tossing up their signifiers as everything slowly goes to shit.

5 KINGS OF LEON - USE SOMEBODY

Third-biggest selling album of last year in the UK. No idea why.

6 TAKE THAT - GREATEST DAY

Second-biggest selling album of last year in the UK. Slightly more obvious why - straddling Radios 1 and 2 like no-one else can at the moment, Take That look more secure than ever. Except for the possible return of Robbie into the fold, of course, which one suspects might fuck things up entirely - he's not the star he was, but he's done enough now to suggest that sitting happily in the background while Mark Owen hilariously switches the labels on the presents will not be for him.

7 JEFF BUCKLEY - HALLELUJAH

Grace currently sits at 68 in the albums, from the previous week's 90.

8 GERALDINE - ONCE UPON A CHRISTMAS SONG

Here's where said story ends. Please.

9 KATY PERRY - HOT N COLD

Ten weeks on now, and this'll probably be up the business end of the charts for a little while yet. Heard it out last night, and the distinctly less-than-subtle boshing suggests it'll be a fixture on the mobile discos for some time to come.

10 KILLERS - HUMAN

Clearly less popular than Kings of Leon over here now. Be interesting to see how many singles they bother releasing off this album in the UK - it's still doing steady business, but I suspect they'll be focusing a bit more on other countries.

11 BRITNEY SPEARS - WOMANIZER

"I'm Like A Circus (I'll Only Fly Away)" has already dipped in and then back out of the top 40, of course.

12 KINGS OF LEON - SEX ON FIRE

Yes, still. "Use Somebody" charting long before it was declared as a second single meant they avoided the problem of trying to step out of the shadow of an album's lead single, unlike, ooh, every other guitar band at the moment (c.f poor old Keane, for example).

13 AKON - RIGHT NOW (NA NA NA)

He's got an album out. No, really, he has.

14 GIRLS ALOUD - THE PROMISE

As Popjustice has already pointed out, the unfurling of the year to come for this lot has been rather changed by Cheryl winning the X Factor. Pretty much averaging an album a year thus far - will that continue in 2009?

15 PINK - SO WHAT

Unlike Akon, her album's selling very nicely indeed, thankyouverymuch, and given that none of the other songs off it have troubled the chart just yet, we can probably expect a steady stream of singles off it for most of the next 12 months.

16 TI FT RIHANNA - LIVE YOUR LIFE

Yes, technically that's the correct order of billing on this single, but TI's inability to leave the US means this is essentially a Rihanna single in the UK, and that's why Good Girl Gone Bad is still at number 20 in the album chart while Paper Trail is down at number 84. That'll teach him to be the opposite of moderate. (One would imagine you can forget about "Whatever You Like" being bothered with as a single in the UK)

17 ALESHA DIXON - THE BOY DOES NOTHING

Course, it ain't just guitar bands whose albums get dwarfed by their lead singles - The Alesha Show is at number 55 at present. Still, in her case, the Strictly machine will likely keep her safe for a bit now, and this has comfortably outperformed "Lipstick" if nothing else.

18 BEYONCE - SINGLE LADIES (PUT A RING ON IT)
19 POGUES FT KIRSTY MACCOLL - FAIRYTALE OF NEW YORK
20 X FACTOR FINALISTS - HERO

One would like to think that some of these will be putting out decent records in future. One is not betting on it. However, the nature of the beast is such that they most likely won't be re-emerging until, ooh, October at the earliest.

21 GURU JOSH PROJECT - INFINITY 2008
22 KATY PERRY - I KISSED A GIRL
23 PUSSYCAT DOLLS - I HATE THIS PART
24 RIHANNA FT JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE - REHAB
25 MARIAH CAREY - ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU
26 SCRIPT - BREAKEVEN
27 50 CENT - GET UP (NEW ENTRY)
28 KANYE WEST - LOVE LOCKDOWN
29 GABRIELLA CILMI - WARM THIS WINTER
30 BEYONCE - LISTEN
31 RIHANNA - DISTURBIA
32 DUFFY - RAIN ON YOUR PARADE
33 N-DUBZ - PAPA CAN YOU HEAR ME
34 SCRIPT - THE MAN WHO CAN'T BE MOVED
35 SATURDAYS - UP
36 SATURDAYS - ISSUES (NEW ENTRY)
37 NE-YO - MAD
38 KANYE WEST - HEARTLESS (NEW ENTRY)
39 KARDINAL OFFISHALL FT AKON - DANGEROUS
40 NE-YO - MISS INDEPENDENT

Are apostrophes in that last thing working for anyone else?

New Year's Day was yesterday, and today's a Friday, so all the papers' culture supplements have come out firing with their big TIPS FOR 2009. Am scanning them now, and there are oodles of names flooding my brain, plenty of which I've not heard. In the spirit of 2009 being The Year In Which I Keep Up Or At Least Make Some Kind Of Effort At So Doing, I'm going to have a go at ploughing through them today.

i haven't seen a TIP FOR 2009 which isn't terrible yet (apart from one or two isolated mentions of jazmine sullivan).

Let's start with the Mail. Why? Well, they would appear to have only tipped the one artist (and you have to dig about on their website a lot to find this out), which means we can knock them off the quickest.

And that tip is... IMELDA MAY! She's a rockabilly artist from Dublin who's already been on Later, where Jeff Beck said he liked her. Songs on her MySpace include "Johnny Got A Boom Boom", "Big Bad Handsome Man", "Don't Do Me No Wrong", "Cry For Me Baby" and "Falling In Love With You Again":

Best of all, she's signed to UCJ, the same label as The Priests, The Fron Male Voice Choir and Thingy Out Of G4. So she'll be in the album chart at some point early this year, say number seven-ish, then proceed to hang about til June or so.

Let's move on.

(Shout out to the Express, btw, who've not tipped anyone at all. Then again, their music section seems to think that Alesha's album is called The Alesha Dixon Show...)

Imelda May's Myspace claims that Kirsty MacColl was a fan, which considering she's been dead nearly a decade, would perhaps imply that May's lying about her age.

Moving onto a thing HMV put out yesterday, where they tipped their top 10 new artists for 2009, and, unlike a lot of the other lists, they've put them in VERY DEFINITE ORDER. Albeit that, looking at that VERY DEFINITE ORDER, it appears to be alphabetical.

Ah.

Anyway, on that basis, their top tip for the next year are... THE ANSWER! They're a hair-metal bunch from Norn Iron who've ALREADY supported AC/DC and ALREADY had a song featured on Guitar Hero: World Tour, and if anyone can tell me what exactly "Never Too Late" is meant to be about they win a shiny 5p piece:

They tour the UK & Ireland in April:

Apr 14
O2 Arena
London,UK

Apr 16
O2 Arena
London,UK

Apr 18
O2 Arena
Dublin,Eire

Apr 21
Men Arena
Manchester,UK

Apr 23
NEC Arena
Birmingham,UK

So yeah, low-key. They seem a safe-ish bet.

HMV's second-biggest of next year: FILTHY DUKES!

We run a club night called Kill Em All that has been going for 5 years, this particular disco is held at Fabric. We have had guests like Justice, Erol Alkan, Bloc Party, Crystal Castles, Late Of The Pier, Chemical Brothers, James Murphy, Jackson & His Computer Band, Zombie Nation, Schinichi Osawa, Brodinski & Simian Mobile Disco. It’s a good party.

Our album, like most personal art forms is a result of our influences, these range from Tangerine Dream to Hot Chip, Can to SMD, Roxy Music to Soulwax, Hip Hop to Krautrock. You know, a bit of old stuff and a bit of modern, plus loads of other things it would take too long to list.

Going off their single, HMV appear to have included them because, as we all know, every list like this needs at least one artist that sounds like Simian Mobile Disco:

Number three on said list, and cropping up almost everywhere else: FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE!

Here's what people have to say about her:

CONOR McNICHOLAS: There's no-one to touch Florence right now. She might be barking but she's more rock 'n' roll than the rest of the scene put together and she's got the tunes and the voice to back it up. An inspiration.

SOME OTHER BLOKE FROM NME: Florence is an enigma and a real star of the future. She's someone we've watched take real shape over this year. She does completely incendiary live performances, whether it be a back room of a pub or comfortably high up the bill at last summer's festivals. If you're going to be lazy, you could say she's a cross between PJ Harvey and Kate Bush: she's full of unhinged raw passion, and effortlessly poetic in an off-kilter manner.

THE HEAD OF MUSIC AT ABSOLUTE RADIO: Our presenter Geoff Lloyd picked Dog Days Are Over as his single of the week and the following week we added it to the playlist. I love the complex song construction and stunning vocals. It is adventurous but it works on radio too.

PETER PAPHIDES IN THE TIMES: More than ever, women are also making the running. Florence And The Machine (pictured) brings her titanium self-confidence to bear upon clattering pop parables about coffin-builder boyfriends and birds whose souls sing out the sins of the people who eat them.

THAT TWAT IN THE SUN: Quirky Londoner FLORENCE WELCH from FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE has already won a Brit Award after taking over from ADELE as the Critics’ Choice holder and is a dead cert for stardom.

JODY THOMPSON IN THE MIRROR: She’s already best mates with Daisy Lowe and Kelly Osbourne, hence a short side-step from being featured in gossip columns the length and breadth of the country. But any fame she gets will be deserved as this lovely-looking London gal has got a great bluesy voice, a ballsy attitude and a cracking way with a stomping, punky rock’n’roll tune. Think a much cooler Kate Nash.

ANDY GILL IN THE INDEPENDENT: indie-soul

Sylvia Patterson's whacking great thing about her from The Guardian Guide can be found here, btw.

Missed one quote out there, whoops:

STUART CLARKE, "TALENT EDITOR", MUSIC WEEK MAGAZINE: I'm tipping Florence and the Machine, because she spent months building her foundations, and it feels like it's growing very naturally. People gravitate toward her in the right way. She's an amazing singer and her songs are getting better, and obviously she's got a lot of media and industry support. From an industry perspective, there's real confidence in her, and from the public's perspective she's in the right place at the right moment.

And if that hasn't swayed you, then I dunno what will.

Number four: GARY GO!

PETER PAPHIDES IN THE TIMES: The burnished creations of heart-on-sleeve troubadour Gary Go are designed to find favour with anyone who has waved their lighter at a Paolo Nutini or James Morrison show.

THE ASSOCIATE PRODUCER OF LIVE FROM ABBEY ROAD: I also like Gary Go, who's a brilliant songwriter with a great pop sensibility. He's an adult pop artist, and all the songwriters who've been successful lately - James Morrison, Paolo Nutini - should be looking over their shoulders.

The most exciting thing the HMV list finds to say about him: "He has already done shows in London."

I saw Kubb's album for £2 in HMV the other day.

Number five is a bit of a wildcard pick, tipped by no-one else so far as I can see... KERI HILSON!

Then again, she was kind of on a number one single in 2006.

And if you're finding this thread somewhat on the dull side so far, here's number six: LAURA IZIBOR!

HMV sez: "Similar in style to Corinne Bailey-Rae, and offering a mixture of smooth, soulful tracks and Stevie Wonder-inspired music, Izibor is predicted to make it big in Ireland as well as Britain." And if you're taking that last bit to mean she's from Ireland, you'd be right.

After that thrilling adventure, list strays back to consensus with number seven: LADY GAGA! Currently number three or thereabouts in the US, having charted in a zillion other countries, and us lucky, lucky lot get to meet her next year. The HMV in the Bullring in Brum has a wee sign up announcing that her single is out on the 12th, which is nice of them.

THE HEAD OF MUSIC AT THE BOX (N.B. NOT THE PUB IN HEADLINGLEY): Just Dance is a great single but the album is full of hit singles. She is also working with the world's contemporary hitmakers, so the A list surely beckons.

THE EDITOR OF RECORDOFTHEDAY.COM: Lady GaGa is promising, too. She's got a Grammy nomination, and that bodes well.

ANDY GILL IN THE INDEPENDENT: electropop

JODY THOMPSON IN THE MIRROR: We’re not bigging up Lady GaGa like everyone else either, as she’s derivative, manufactured pop pap who tiresomely tries to emulate the raunch of a Dirrrty-era Christina Aquilera about five years too late. Honestly, she’s really quite rubbish.

Ooooh.

Maer consensus at eight: LITTLE BOOTS!

PETER ROBINSON FROM POPJUSTICE: Victoria Hesketh is the perfect pop star. She knocks out great tunes and takes her music seriously while celebrating the giddy heights of pop at its best. As a result, she understands pop in a way that puts her miles ahead of her nearest rivals.

THE PRODUCER OF LATER WITH JOOLS HOLLAND: Imagine if Debbie Harry had come from Blackpool and played the synthesiser. 2009 looks set to be dominated by the sound of electropop and Ms Boots should be one if its stars with her wonderfully catchy pop songs.

THAT BLOKE FROM THE NME THAT ISN'T CONOR McNICHOLAS THAT I QUOTED EARLIER: Little Boots is the most exciting dance-pop hope for 2009. She has reimagined the lost art of choruses for the electro-disco generation.

HIM FROM RECORD OF THE DAY: There are a couple of other girls around at the moment who are also pop and electro, like Florence and La Roux, but Little Boots is the most accessible, enjoyable and quirky.

NOB IN THE SUN: Multi-talented Blackpool girl LITTLE BOOTS will unleash her debut album in the summer, and it will be a big one.

THINGY IN THE MIRROR: 25-year-old Little Boots used to sing with indie no-marks Dead Disco, but is destined for much greater things now she’s gone it alone. Her schtick takes the timeless pop of Blondie and stirs in a shade of 21st Century grime to create a rather moreish new flavour. Vic also writes her own songs, as well as playing all her own instruments and singing, and even finds time to do a spot of DJing and remixing. All this and she sounds a bit like Sarah Cracknell from St Etienne which is a very, very good thing indeed.

ANDY GILL IN THE INDEPENDENT: electropop

(brief pause to check world hasn't ended)

(Man City might be signing Wayne Bridge)

Number nine - RED LIGHT COMPANY!

'member how, when we did that thread about the BBC's longlist for Sound of 2009, Lex said he'd not listened to half of them because they were indie bands? I think this lot are what he assumed was happening.

(they've toured with Editors)

And this list ends with another consensus pick, at number ten: WHITE LIES!

HEAD OF MUSIC AT XFM: I love bands that create their own world and, although the influences are pretty clear, this album still sounds very fresh. Most importantly, however, the songs already feel stadium-sized.

THE EDITOR OF Q: Lots of newish bands have tried to take that icy melodic, Joy Division-esque sound and run with it but most of them have forgotten the need for great songs. White Lies haven't, which makes them stand out.

THE PRODUCER OF LATER: In the boys with guitars department, 2008 belonged to the US. White Lies should turn the tide back to the UK in 2009. With their epic and soaring songs, atmospheric shows and nod to the likes of Editors and Joy Division, they should have a successful year.

ANOTHER MAN FROM Q: White Lies' doomy, Joy Divisionesque rock is going to be a good thing in a year of recession. The record is a great gothic pop album.

HIM IN THE TIMES: With the anthemic monochrome indie rock of To Lose My Life - released in January, supported by an extensive tour throughout February - White Lies are expected to impose themselves upon 2009 the way Arctic Monkeys did on 2006.

In summary: 300-post thread by tomorrow, obv.

all these also-ran Joy Division knockoff guys sitting in their office jobs ten years later nodding their heads and going "ah yes, we forgot the need for great songs"

if only one of their mothers had thought to write it down on a post-it note for them

the likes of Editors and Joy Division
the likes of Editors and Joy Division
the likes of Editors and Joy Division

Actually, White Lies are worthy of note simply for being one of the worst fucking bands I've heard in some time.

That Red Light Company thing is irritatingly catchy. Mind, so are crabs.

Let's move onto The Mirror, cos their list only has five things on it and we've already had two of them (Boots, Flossie).

Only one act on the list crops up nowhere else: KID BRITISH!

A seven-piece ragtag collective who call themselves hip hop Rude Boys, Kid British are a Madness, Gorillaz and The Streets-loving ska-kissed Specials for the 21st Century. Their version of Our House is going to be huge when it comes out, we guarantee.

We mentioned them when I did those playlist polls last year, possibly on Huw Stephens' show. No-one liked them then. I suspect not much will have changed.

None of these acts catch my eye. They're all either more of the same old shite (indie rock, X-Factor style solo singers, blah blah), or some record company's idea of what might be "hip and cool, man" (Kid British, White Lies, Gary Go).
Also...

8 GERALDINE - ONCE UPON A CHRISTMAS SONG

Here's where said story ends. Please.

...never stopped Kay before. Expect some Easter themed misery.

Dear Kid British

BUY AN A-Z, YOU FUCKING CUNTS.

FOR FUCK'S SAKE SNOBALL WE HAVEN'T FINISHED YET

The two remaining tips from The Mirror were both discussed on IT'S THE FUTURE, IT'S THE FUTURE: BBC Sound of 2009 'Longlist' Poll

Neither did very well. At all.

(then again, neither did anyone else)

First: VV BROWN!

VV Brown - or Vanessa when her mum's calling her in for her tea - is a massive star in the making with beauty, a cracking voice and a genuine talent as a songwriter and multi-instrumentalist.

She’s also, rather more intriquingly, a be-quiffed cheeky Fifties throw-back with a neat line in quirky, computer game music-influenced, high-octane pop with a core of ska and proper rock’n’roll running right through it.

Aged just 24, this London lass has already paid her dues with years of graft on the UK’s toilet circuit after cutting her teeth as a backing singer in Los Angeles, before being snapped up by Island records.

And other people like her too!

PRODUCER OF LATER:She continues the trend of today's girls, borrowing from the '60s, but VV takes it in a purely pop direction. She's talented, bright, infectious and, refreshingly, she isn't surrounded by teams of producers and writers.

HIM FROM Q: Great voice, great look, ready-made star. Simple as that.

HIM FROM THE BOX: She has a totally fresh approach to pop songs - the commercial appeal of Kate Nash with the credible box still firmly ticked.

LIVE AT ABBEY ROAD MAN: VV Brown has got a fantastic excitement about her. She looks amazing and she's a sensational singer. She's a bit R&B, a bit ska and about 50% pop - she's taken lots of different influences and rolled them into VV Brown.

SUN TOSSER: Then there’s Northampton girl VV BROWN who will throw a bit of doo-wop into the retro mix.

A seven-piece ragtag collective who call themselves hip hop Rude Boys, Kid British are a Madness, Gorillaz and The Streets-loving ska-kissed Specials for the 21st Century.

Yeah, I always wondered what a ska-influenced version of The Specials would sound like

And then there's EMPIRE OF THE SUN!

A bit of a cheat this one, as one half of duo Empire Of The Sun comprises of Luke Steele, frontman of Australian band The Sleepy Jackson, who just happen to be one of Mirror.co.uk Showbiz Tower’s favourite ever bands. He’s teamed up with fellow Aussie Nick Littlemore of electronic outfit Pnau and their album of psychedelia-meets-Prince-electro-pop has already made it into the Top 10 Down Under.

If nothing else, I think that allows us to pinpoint the precise year Jody Thompson went to university.

Lots of people are getting behind these boys too, including:

CONOR McNICHOLAS: I hated Empire of the Sun at first. It sounded over-played, over-produced and over-thought. But relentless spins on the NME stereo has made me fall for their lush '80s sound. The tracks throb and glow. Will be one of the albums of the year, no doubt.

ONE OF THE BLOKES FROM ALPHABEAT: I also have to mention Empire of the Sun. They have a MGMT vibe, and the singer is a bit weird: they did a showcase where he started off by doing standup comedy, and people didn't understand the humour, so he got pissed off and didn't do the gig. He's got a weird star quality.

THAT MAN FROM THE SUN AGAIN: The entire Bizarre team are behind the most shining example — EMPIRE OF THE SUN. The psychedelic Aussie duo are a perfect example of the year’s electro-pop sound. Think MGMT meets disco house. The title track single from album Walking On A Dream — both out in February — will be an absolute smash and loved by indie kids, pop lovers and ravers alike. We Are The People is sure to be another big single.

ANDY GILL IN THE INDEPENDENT: Empire Of The Sun, an Australian psychedelic offshoot of The Sleepy Jackson, should also attract attention

are you enjoying yourself will?

Relatively speaking. The heating doesn't work in my house at the moment and I'm off to work in a minute.

Actually, fuck it, let's shamelessly pander to you. The Sun's done a whacking great round-up of new artists for next year and interviewed them, and it's the only place that mentions...

JAZMINE SULLIVAN! (though they just call her 'JAZMINE' for some reason)

In these interviews, the first question they ask is "WHY will 2009 belong to you?" Most of the artists are all like "Oh, er, time belongs to no-one" or something; Jazmine's response: "I’m also working on a movie and endorsements."

Interestingly, according to her her album is "out next June". Given that I picked it up for £6.99 in Zavvi last week, I am a bit surprised to hear this.

am guessing it's the old "r&b soft release" thing there. getting her PR to answer emails was a massive fucking hassle this year.

also where is the sun's interview w/jazmine? can't find it on their hideous site

If nothing else, I think that allows us to pinpoint the precise year Jody Thompson went to university.

lol, pretty sure she's closer to 40 than 20 as it goes

btw that jazmine performance is ok but her most show-stopping youuutuuuube moment is probably this video (one of the first things i heard by her) -

The Sun's interview series is bloody tricky to navigate, yes, cos they've not given it much attention due to Gordon Smart boldly predicting that a bunch of acts from the Sound of 2009 longlist plus Kasabian and Noel Gallagher will have big years.

Part 1 - White Lies, Lady GaGa, VV Brown
Part 2 (expect billed as part 1 continued) - Passion Pit, Eliza Doolittle, First Aid Kit, Kid British
Part 3 (but called part 2 for some reason) - La Roux, Empire of the Sun, Karima Francis
Part 3 (except billed as part 2) - Flossie, Jazmine, Little Boots, Gary Go plus a "best of the rest" bit

The pavements are frozen, Wedgwood are about to go into administration, Saints are out of the FA Cup - yes, it's time for the first new chart of the year!

And what a chart it isn't. Simon Cowell's Christmas Miracle continues into the New Year, with Alex and Leona occupying the top two places, but it's a smashing great new entry at number three for Lady GaGa ON DOWNLOADS ALONE so give it a fortnight and it might yet make number two.

Nothing else of interest happens in the top 20 - Buckley slips to 22 (HUSTLIN' HUSTLIN' HUS-HUS-HUSTLIN'), one ahead of Sugababes Have Made A Car Out Of Men. Both the Saturdays' current hits climb this week, with "Issues" at 27 and "Up" at 29, and there's re-entries for "Dance Wiv Me" (31), "Viva La Vida" (33), That One MGMT Single That I Can't Remember How It Goes (37) and The Most Insipid Girls Aloud Single Ever (39). Kevin "Mark Ronson Without The Skillz" Rudolf gets a top 40 bow at number 40 exactly.

Albums this week dominated by new entries, unless you take "dominated" to mean "topped", in which case it's still dominated by Take That. However, there's a not-entirely-expected re-entry for Girls Aloud's Greatest Hits at 6, along with slightly more predictable post-Christmas re-emergences for Elbow (11), MGMT (13), A Michael Jackson Compilation (20), The Previous Take That Album (30), ABBA Gold (34) and Vampire Weekend (39), who possibly benefited from having "A-Punk" included in Xmas TOTP's montage of hits from the first half of 2008. At time of writing, "A-Punk"'s chart peak - number 55. Hmm...

"A-Punk" played everywhere, everybody loves it, but the 'on-sale' version was a 7" with a CD for double the price. (2 tracks, total)...

... which presumably 'made' people 'continue' to buy the album.

Sound of 2009 finished today, and your winner: Little Boots. White Lies were runners-up, then Flossie, Him Out Of The Sleepy Jackson, La Roux (incidentally, if you didn't like her before, then have a watch of the interview with her walking round an indoor market in Brixton - totally change your mind, that will), GaGa, VV Brown, Kid Cudi, Passion Pit and Dan Black. In that order.

And of that lot, the first Radio 1 playlist of the year has Kid Cudi on A-List, White Lies on B, and Empire of the Sun on '1 Upfront'. HMV favourite Gary Go also finds himself on '1 Upfront', while Scott Mills has Red Light Company as his record of the week.

Viewing the playlist in non-HOT/NEW/HOT&NEW terms: Lily, Franz and The Fray spearhead the A-List. Razorlight and Snow Patrol's flagging new albums get another push (one interesting fact gleaned from those articles last week - Slipway Fires apparently only managed three weeks inside the top 75), and are joined by Jason Mraz, and, somewhat out of the blue, Tinchy Stryder. No, really.

B-List sees Ida Maria having a go at following up her hit from, ooh, about a year ago now? She's accompanied by student faves Pendulum and Frank Turner, more album-pushing from Bloc Party, Keane, Coldplay, Flobbadob Boy and The Game, Jordin Sparks confirming it'll be a year or two before she gets her hands on another "No Air", the first proper solo single for Daniel Merriweather (heard "Stop Me" for the first time in ages the other night, really enjoyed it), another punt for Jay Sean (continuing his run of fantastic song titles with "Tonight") and... The Airborne Toxic Event. I have not heard them, but from their name I'm imagining thay might not be A Good Thing. Also, "Spaceman" by The Killers gets its first week on the playlist.

C-List has a return for Cage The Elephant, the rock equivalent of trying to make 'fetch' happen. Also: Alesha, The View (second single off their album, you'd be forgiven for not noticing the first one), "Sirrrrr-cuss", All-American Rejects (top 20 in the US at the moment, innit?), your friends and mine FLEET FOXES, and Chase & Status ft. Kano, which might well be the most Zane Lowe combination of all time. Alongside Empire and Gaz on 1-Upfront, there's TV On The Radio, Timmy Vegas and Innerpartysystem, which might be an even worse band name than The Airborne Toxic Event. I am not sure.

GaGa number one in the midweeks.

Jason Mraz has just had his first UK hit at number 34.

And "Gangsta's Paradise" has re-entered, at number 31.

We are going to have so much fun on this thread.

2 out of 3 ain't bad

And so Lady Gaga's number one, and at number two we have James "Interesting" Morrison. Alexandra slips to three. Lots of big climbs - "Issues" rises up to 6, Keving Rudlof is now at 10, Kanye Can Only Express His Sadness Via The Jetsons is at 14, and, in a development that can only possibly be a good thing, UMMGUMMT climb from 37 to 16 with That One That Goes "See Something Something TREEEEES Something". "Mad" climbs to number 22, with "Circus" climbing back to 24. Coolio re-enters at 31. Jason Mraz 34, Pink 37, Alesha 39.

I can't be bollixed saying owt about albums, except that Kings of Leon are back at number one. Kylie Remix Extravaganza is your sole new entry at 28, but there's all kinds of re-entries all over the place.

"And "Gangsta's Paradise" has re-entered, at number 31."

what no Same Old Brand New You? :-(

anyone placing any bets on Kid Cudi knocking off GaGa the top? Please, she's horrible.

anyone keeping Morrison off the top is alright by me

Stop hating, Steve. HE CAN'T TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT AIN'T REAL.

LAMMO WEIGHS IN

http://homepages.nyu.edu/~rsa221/Logan

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7823982.stm

anyone keeping Morrison off the top is alright by me

I don't mind the Morrison actually, it's an innocuous duet that's basically a rewrite of the Snow Patrol/Martha Wainwright one. It even rips off the video of them singing at each other through a glass window.

I don't feel like slapping Morrison the way I do GaGa.

Kid Cudi will knock them both off anyway

i feel like slapping them both aside but the diff is that beyonce has done the job on morrison already.

hang on what lol kid cudi vs crookers is going to be no 1? oh, british public, six months behind at best.

oh, british public, buying a record that now has an official UK release.

How can the public buy something that wasnt out til now? Blame the artist/record label

http://www.discogs.com/Kid-Cudi-Vs-Crookers-Day-N-Nite/release/1535006

released early nov 08

Country: Italy
Released: 10 Nov 2008

To be fair to Lex, you can get a £30 return to Italy nowadays. It says a lot for the backwards thinking and, yeah I'll say it, RACISM of the British music-buying public that they weren't prepared to take a day off, throw down three beer tokens, jet off to buy a Kid Cudi single, and return back.

yeah lex stop blaming public when it's promoters and execs to blame. same stupid deal with 'do u mind' after all.

"country" on discogs refers to the nationality of the artist o_0

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Day-n-Nite-Kid-Cudi/dp/B001MIVU12/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1231807969&sr=1-1

January 12 2009

Discogs lists, as you'd presume being as it's fucking discogs, the vinyl release.

Did you buy it in November, Lex?

What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?

63% buy the item featured on this page:
Day 'n' Nite

15% buy
Just Dance (2)
£0.59

7% buy
Oracular Spectacular (41)
£6.98

7% buy
The Bang Gang Deejays 'D Is For Disco, E Is For Dancing'
£12.99

Music in 2009: it's awesome

"country" on discogs refers to the nationality of the artist o_0

― lex pretend

Not in my experience it doesn't.

e.g.

http://www.discogs.com/Alejandro-Vivanco-Madre-Tierra/release/1351258

http://www.discogs.com/Ice-Cube-You-Can-Do-It/release/342575

Straight outta Bromsgrove

I just want to know if the lex bought it in november

i was sent the mp3 in, like, may 08. at which point it was already ubiquitous in clubs. anyway i ain't blaming the public, it's just funny and sort of sweet when they catch on so late (like with benga & coki's 'night' like a year later lol), it's also funny and sort of sweet that mes haterz suddenly care about kid cudi release dates!

http://www.discogs.com/Ellen-Allien-Sool/release/1311694

^^only released in GER clearly

it's prob the nationality of the label or something, who really cares

And here's the first 1Xtra playlist of the year. Of particular note - Donaeo's "African Warrior/Devil in a Blue Dress" is on there. Much like it was last August. 1Xtra seems a weirdly depressing place to be, somehow - their schedule on Saturday night simultaneously broadcasts Trevor Nelson's Radio 1 show. Whatever for?

im not a hater.

There's a lot less out-there/underground UK crossover stuff on the 1Xtra playlist than there used to be. Annoying. Also, does "Crack A Bottle" really need to be on a fucking A-list anywhere in 2009?

I can't remember the last time i heard the radio that wasn't when i was in someones car.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/pop_ups/08/entertainment_enl_1232017849/img/1.jpg

Former Spice Girl Emma Bunton (left) has ruled out the possibility of another reunion while encouraging the public to ditch white bread as part of the Hovis Wholemeal Challenge. Meanwhile, former bandmate Victoria Beckham (right) features on a new campaign for Emporio Armani women's underwear.

And in playlist news - Radio 1 promotes Coldplay, Ida Maria and Danny Merriweather to the A-List. Somewhat confusingly, "Single Ladies" hadn't been on their playlist before, but they're gonna be a bit cautious and just put it on the B-List for now, see if it clicks with the public. It is joined by the new U2 single. Miley Cyrus, The King Blues, N-Dubz, The Prodigy and Rudenko are all added to the C, where they're joined by the entirety of last week's 1-Upfront list - Empire of the Sun, Gary Go and Innerpartysystem - as well as UMMGUMMT, who are valiantly reviving the art of indie bands re-releasing singles for fuck-all reason, in this case with "Time To Pretend" (this being compounded by the fact that "Kids" is the song of theirs that's currently inside the top 20. Hmm). Your all-new 1-Upfront bunch - Blame, Kyla & Crazy Cousins, and Little Boots.

Meanwhile, on Radio 2:

A LIST

JEM - It's Amazing
GIRLS ALOUD – The Loving Kind
DANIEL MERRIWEATHER - Change
*NEW* MORRISSEY - I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris
FLEET FOXES - Mykonos
PAUL CARRACK - I Don’t Want Your Love
JAMES TAYLOR - It's Growing
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN & THE E STREET BAND - Working On A Dream
LILY ALLEN - The Fear
COLDPLAY - Life In Technicolor II

B LIST

THE FIREMAN - Dance Till We're High
ANASTACIA - Absolutely Positively
IMELDA MAY - Johnny Got A Boom Boom
BRYN CHRISTOPHER - Fearless
JAMES MORRISON - Broken Strings feat. Nelly Furtado
*NEW* TOM JONES - Give A Little Love
*NEW* ALESHA DIXON - Breathe Slow
*NEW* STONE WALTERS - Trouble
*NEW* THE KILLERS - Spaceman
*NEW* GARY GO - Wonderful
ENYA - My! My! Time Flies!

C LIST

GLENN TILBROOK AND THE FLUFFERS - Still
*NEW* WAYNE GIDDEN - I've Changed My Ways
HENRY PRIESTMAN - Grey Is The New Blonde
LISBEE STAINTON - Red

lol "fluffers"

that is the best photo of posh i've ever seen

and the 2nd best of emma

Somewhat confusingly, "Single Ladies" hadn't been on their playlist before, but they're gonna be a bit cautious and just put it on the B-List for now, see if it clicks with the public

you would think its current top 10 position would give them some indication of this

"Single Ladies" hadn't been on their playlist before

Unforgiveable. Fuck Radio 1.

And so Gaga was number one again and Kid Cudi was number two and everything else = zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... well, I mean, I suppose it's kind of noteworthy that The Saturdays are at number 4 and Girls Aloud are at number 10, or that "Heartless" is at 11, or that "Breathe Slow" climbs to 23, or that there are first-evah hits for White Lies and Tinchy Stryder, but it's just really not very interesting anymore, is it? Lady Gaga has her second-evah hit at number 30 with the ineffably tedious "Poker Face" and A Jordin Sparks Single Or Something is also new.

So come on the albums, let's get some life into - oh wait The Script are number one never mind then. Lady Gaga is at 3, Fleet Foxes 13 (fiver in HMV is probably a contributing factor, I guess), Roger Whittaker 17, Animal Collective 26.

and rabid Girls Aloud fans breathe a collective sigh of relief as "The Loving Kind" just barely manages to keep their top 10 singles run intact. It's their 20th but was apparently only 500 copies clear of Kanye.

Kevin Rudolf up to 5 - a number one in the making if the UK public has any sense. Great single.

Midweeks:

The Lady still holding off the Kid at the top & the top five completely unchanged; Tinchy up to 8, Kanye to 9, new FRanz F only makes it to 22.

In the albums the fucking awful White Lies are in at number one FFS OBTUSE BRITISH PUBLIC GIVE ME SOME DECENT NUMBER ONE ALBUMS TO WRITE ABOUT IN MY OLD AGE and the new Antony is in at 6.

Perhaps worth pointing out that the current number one album, i.e. The Script, is in the 2 for £10 at HMV.

Antony at 6 and Animal Collective at 26 in the same week Kaka turned down City = my faith in humanity is restored. Tinchy breaking the top 10 is great too.

The Grauniad says the charts matter again.

Question is: it's all very well saying that "single sales" were up last year, but what price "single sales" when at 79p per download the business is making zero money out of them?

How much money did anyone ever make off CD singles etc though? Taking into account pressing and distribution costs.

Probably very little. Generally they were designed as loss leader promos for albums.

Also the FT graph cited is misleading - I suspect one showing actual singles sales would have told a very different story.

Things pick up a little, but not to the extent that GaGa's not number one anymore or anything. Howeverrrrr - Stryder's climbed to number 3, which is sort of something; "Sober" gets to 9, and "Heartless" cracketh the top 10 at last at, er, 10. "Breathe Slow" clambers to 13. Yr highest new entry - Franz, with "Ulysses" debuting at a Maximo Park-tastic number 20. And that's with physicals factored in. Still, their being on Domino means they're probably not gonna have to worry about being dropped or anything, which is alright. Jay Sean is at number 23 and is sort of OK in an unremarkable manner, but there's a wee surprise lurking further down - yes, Bon Iver has now had as many top 40 hits as The Bravery, with "Blood Bank" entering at number 37.

White Lies heroically top the album chart for no reason at all, and they're not even in the 2 for £10 or anything. Triumph for real music, I guess. Mraz, Saturdays and UMMGUMMT make their first incursions into the album chart top 10 at 8 thru 10, with Seasick Steve re-entering at 17 off the back of his being featured on BBC 4 last Friday. Antony and The Johnsons are at 18 (DEAL WITH IT, TALVIN SINGH), and some other Seasick Steve album makes its chart debut at 37.

Maybe it's all their adverts on TV and on Spotify.

TOP FIVE ALBUMS
1. To Lose My Life - White Lies
2. The Script - Script
3. Only By The Night - Kings Of Leon
4. The Fame - Lady GaGa
5. Songs For You Truths For Me - James Morrisson

Has there been a worse top 5 in the past year?

Incidentally, despite his singles chart superstardom, Bon Iver's album has yet to grace the UK top 40.

White Lies heroically top the album chart for no reason at all

The White Lies album is selling for under £7 at Sainsbury's.

Seasick Steve re-entering at 17 off the back of his being featured on BBC 4 last Friday

also the Brit nom probably

Also £7 at HMV.

Midweeks:

1 (up from 168!) Lily Allen
2 GaGa
3 Cudi
4 Tinchy
5 Jim Morrison & Nelly F
6 Alesha
7 Kevin Rudolf
8 Beyonce
9 Saturdays
10 Leon and the Kings
11 Tommy Reilly (que?)

In the albums, the Boss at 1, Franz at 2 and, erm, Rifles at 17.

Tommy Reilly was on Mobile Act Unsigned, the indie X-Factor on T4 Sunday mornings.

Rifles (que?)

Bog standard English pseudo-indie beloved of Dermot O'Dreary.

http://designermagazine.tripod.com/TheRiflesPIC1.jpg

That hat guy looks really annoying.

^^^ This is never not true.

Hmmm, I wonder which band they sound exactly like.

http://img.skysports.com/08/05/218x298/TheRifles_841585.jpg

Is it me or does the Lily Allen single sound like 'Calling America' period ELO, a sound I never thought would be revived?

I really like the sound of that song as long as I don't pay attention to the words.

After two whole weeks, Little Boots has vanished from the Radio 1 playlist. Oh. Instead, they look to be giving Ladyhawke another go. Also: first appearance for Chipmunk, and returns for PCD, Wombats, Friendly Fires, Kings of Leon, Red Light Company, Kelly Clarkson and Akon Ft. Kardinal Offishal Ft. Colby O'Donis. Also the fourth single off the Ting Tings album is on the B-List. Still, at least "Hwawt & Cwowld" has finally buggered off.

Wombats? Bit late for "Is this Christmas" init?

Gaga finally trumped by The Triumphant Return Of Lily Allen, garnering her second number one with "Bad Things Are Bad, I Suppose". Except for Alesha's second incursion into the top 10, at number six, nothing else to note up there...

So what else? Well, OrangeUnsignedAct (it might have spaces, but it doesn't feel as though it would) winner Tommy Reilly gets what may end up being the first of many hits for him at number 14. Having watched a couple of episodes of said programme, I can confidently say this might have turned out significantly worse. Then again, having watched a couple of episodes of said programme, I was fairly certain that it wouldn't actually have any impact on anything outside of its allotted running time, so for a top 20 hit to have come out of it... we shall see how developments unfold, eh? Another first-time hit sees Shontelle at 25, and then at 35 THE FRAY ARE BACK, and at 38 ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS ARE BACK, and at 39 The Airborne Toxic Event are, um, a band, I guess.

Albums - BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCE is at number one, with Franz Ferdinand slotting in behind. Rifles (why?) at 27, and Naturally 7 - NO INSTRUMENTS, JUST VOICES, FUCK YOU "MOGWAI" - at 29. Ah, January, we barely knew ye...

Lillah has herself a merry little second week ahead of Gaga, with Tinchy Stryder up at number three. Right behind them - new entry! Eminem = Back! Lovely. Daniel Merriweather's shit-awful "Change" pings in at eight.

Below the ten - "T-Shirt" climbs to 13, "Gives You Hell" climbs to 20. Coldplay's "Life In Technicolor 2" takes a bow at 28. Airborne Toxic Event are up to 33, and N-Dubz get (I think) their third top 40 hit at number 40.

Bruce stays almighty in the albums. However, who's that roaring up to number 3? It's Fleet Foxes, that's who! They get advertised on telly now and everything! The View's Very Important Second Album debuts at 4. That also gets advertised on telly, but they're not allowed to call it "Which Bitch" on telly. Elbow are also on the climb, up to 6 from 17, and Alesha is knocking on the door of the top 10 for the first time in ages, up to number 12. One behind her is A Buddy Holly Compilation; two further down, Luciano Pavarotti's "Duets" album; four after that, The Love Songs Of UB40. Yes. Then at 23, The Cover Songs Of James Taylor. Uh-huh. And at 27, The Love Songs Of Luther Vandross. Officially eight places less good than The Love Songs Of UB40.

Incidentally, Tonight: Franz Ferdinand drops from 2 to 21 this week. Hmm.

They're so Last Night.

The strongest top ten singles chart in years - James Morrison the only real dud in there unless you count 50 Cent's deflating/delibidinising contribution to "Crack A Bottle." If that doesn't get to number one I'm putting all the blame on him.

Sad about the evaporation of interest in Franz because their new album is very good indeed.

So, Saint Etienne high in the midweeks? Hmm?

Well, Top 30, so it looks like another case of straight in at 26 and straight out again.

They pulled out the stops: 3 formats, each limited to 1500, signed I don't know how many, and distributed via orders off their website linked to an affiliated (i.e. chart counting) company.

Also, downloads.

Chart hyping is so 2004.

Sad about the evaporation of interest in Franz because their new album is very good indeed.

someone tell me about the dub mixes please.
are they proper dubbed up (a la mad professor/on-u for example), or just instrumentals ?

no, they're proper dubbed up dubs and certainly as good as if not better than the album proper.

damn .. going to regret not getting it then aren't i?
i did think that the dub version would be a lot more up my street ..

Well, HMV Online seem to have the box, still.

£45 though!

I mean, I'm sure all those 7" singles look very nice, and the DVD is worth one eplay, maybe two. But, let's call CD1 at £8, and CD2 (the dubz) as £8 also (being generous), that's an extra £29 for a bunch of 7" singles that'll never get played, a DVD and a nice box.

This is what Downloading is supposed to be for. And is it? No.

Downstairs in the singles:

The Fray get dunked to 42 after one week in the top 40; "YOO-LUH-SEEES" falls 20 to 26; Tommy Reilly drops from 14 to 60. Kyla's "Do You Mind" drops from 48 to 55, and its continued marooning on Radio 1's 1-Upfront list suggests its chips are basically had. Akon's "Beautiful" gets to experience "Ruby" Syndrome, i.e. first single off album hangs about for so long that it basically eclipses all subsequent singles off album, and is at 56 from last week's 52.

But on their way up:

TI in "possibly getting two hits off this album" shocker, with "Dead & Gone" creeping up to 47 from last week's 58; "Theme from Barclaycard Fraud" re-enters at 52; a 28-place leap puts Miley's "Fly On The Wall" at 54, but also suggests that that might be its peak; The Killers' "Spaceman" goes up a much more sensible 19 places, to 57 - more of a stealthy crawl there, methinks. Katy Perry's "Thinking of You" holds 62 for a second week, lurking in an unexploded-bomb-tastic kind of a way; The View's "Shock Horror" debuts at 64. What with their last single doing the wrong side of fuck-all, don't bet on it bothering the 40. A super-uber-massive leap puts New Take That Single at 72, one ahead of, er, "I'll Be Missing You". At 75 is something called "Don't Stop The Rock" by someone calling themselves Freestyle. Dunno what that is. Then lolcharts:

76) SWAY FT AKON - SILVER & GOLD
77) SAM SPARRO - BLACK & GOLD

Presumably this is not quite so lol if you're Sway. 50 place climb for him, tho, and 13 up for Sparro. That fairly awesome ad for Mad Men Series Two results in "Paint It Black" making a fairly welcome return at 82 (from last week's 106) and there's also substantial climbings for Kardinal Offishall ft. Keri Hilson (84), "Sweet About Me" (87) and "Don't Stop Believin'" (89). Other low-end lurkers of interest - "I'm So Paid" at 83, Muse's cover of "Feeling Good" at 97 (up from 100).

Oh, I was meaning to add:

That "Let it rock" track was bugging me, then I recalled what track I was thinking of: "Are Everything" Buzzcocks...

Muse's cover of "Feeling Good" at 97 (up from 100).

those TV syncs really do make some tracks work that little bit better dont they
- this is being used on the Film4 one at the moment isn't it.

'dead and gone' is going to be massive, and deservedly so. what a song. even hearing it 9383029484003494 times on the video shoot last week couldn't make me sick of it.

was awaiting paleface & kyla's 'do you mind' becoming the first crossover uk funky hit but it seems to have peaked at 48...i have no idea why chart success isn't happening for the big funky anthems, even bassline eked a couple of top 3 hits out.

holding back a Summer holiday clubbing anthem's full release for over 6 months = disappointing chart position

altho Kid Cudi/Crookers may argue otherwise

h two o and platnum would also argue otherwise

i don't think i heard that until just before it actually came out tho

i heard it in like may 07. and you wouldn't have heard paleface & kyla before it came out if the funky thread hadn't flagged it up.

that is true. i blame industrial fragmentation + general indifference.

also can't be arsedness of today's kids to spend money on stuff rather than just downloading it wch means charts/release schedules remain dominated by geriatric cocque rocque to satisfy demands of ppl who still buy cds, viz. fifty yr old blokes.

Midweeks:

1 Lily
2 GaGa
3 Alesha
4 Eminem - paying the price for having boring 50 Cent on board an otherwise excellent record
5 Tinchy
6 Morrison & Furtado
7 Cudi
8 Beyonce
9 Rudolf
10 Merryweather

New entries for Morrissey at 18, Prodigy at 25 and St Et at a rather disappointing (for them) 26.

In the albums, Lily straight in at the top and the Fray in at number three.

I dunno, first top thirty hit for StEt since May 1998!

Big news in the Radio 1 playlist side of things: this is the year that Taylor Swift gets to happen in the UK. Or at least that's the theory - "Love Story" parachutes onto the C-List anyhow. It's joined by Scouting For Girls, The Script, and Wayyyyysis, along with Flo Rida's reimagining of "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)" and The Saturdays' version of "Just Can't Get Enough", BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY IT IS JOINED BY:

New Royksopp single! Whey!

Also on the 1-Upfront side of things we can find Dan Black, Bon Iver, In Case Of Fire, YouMeAtSix and The Noisettes. ILM Trax Poll 2008 superstars Friendly Fires have wound their way onto the B-List, meaning they get to rub shoulders with Gary Go, while Kelly Clarkson, Chase & Status ft. Kano and The Prodigy all get to take up space on the A-List.

Friendly Fires were such a disappointment on the NME tour this week. Hell, even White Lies out-performed them.

The bar raised to Olympian heights there...

'Jump In The Pool' is the new single? good it's the best thing on the album

never mind, that came out in September (man what a shit video too).

They should just outsource everything to Aeroplane and Au Revoir Simone from now on...

Chase & Status ft. Kano

I really like this, even if its a bit LOL Big Beat Grime. The drums seem to suit Kano's flow.

Meanwhile the Royksopp one is so similar to Eple it's difficult to take seriously.

I take back what I said upthread about the Franz 'dub' CD, apparently it's available as a 2CD version of "Tonight", for about a pound more in HMV.

So, fair play.

Still Lily over Lady, with "Breathe Slow" causing a mild upset by sneaking up to number three. Our highest new entry is, er, The Prodigy - "Omen" slots in at number eight. According to Radio 1, their label is Takemetothehospital. Which is possibly news to the people at Cooking Vinyl. "T-Shirt" hits the top 10 for the first time, at number 10.

A five-place slump drops Merriweather to 13, and "Sex On Fire" celebrates TWENTY-THREE SODDING WEEKS on the chart by climbing back into the top 20 at number 19. I'm fairly certain that, of those 23 weeks, only two have been spent outside the top 20. Men'al.

Morrissey's "Y'All Bitches 09" is new at 21. N-Dubz climb 15 to 25, and there's a not-completely-explicable ten-place rebound for "Up" at 27. TI & Timberlake debut at 30, M.I.A.'s kid enters this world to a re-entry for "Paper Planes" at 33, "You Found Me" returns at 37 and The Second Single Off The Killers Are A Very Important Band Indeed debuts at 40. No room at the inn for St Etienne in the end.

Lillah also goes straight to the summit of the albums, in a chart that is perhaps a wee bit distorted by the Valentine's market. UB40 and Luther Vandross go rocketing up to 3 and 4 respectively, which leaves one wondering precisely what kind of person would find Ali Campbell's voice in any way romantic. The Best Bette also enjoys a revival, climbing 26 places to number 6 (just behind James Morrison - man, Britain must be having some seriously joyless sex these days), with The Fray's second album debuting at 8. Seasick Steve climbs from 33 to 24, The View slump from 4 to 27, Slumdog Millionaire's OST enters at 30, and The Airborne Toxic Event make it all the way to number 35.

No Valentine's rebound for Kanye, oddly enough.

"A five-place slump drops Merriweather to 13"

^^^for a minute there I was suddenly confused, and well, happy to see Animal Collective doing amazing. Damn you British public.

No room at the inn for St Etienne in the end.

boo shux

Number 56 in the end, four places behind MCR's version of "Desolation Row". Not much else of note in the 40-75 range, except that, for the second week running, "Black & Gold" has had a sizeable rebound, this week climbing 17 to number 60. Oh, and "Fly On The Wall" just might be hitting the top 40 after all, bouncing up 10 to 44 this week.

it's weird - though heartening - to see that 'spotlight' is still hanging around at no 53 - 22 weeks on the chart without ever reaching the top 10.

It's still getting very heavily rinsed on Tumf and 4Music, at least based on the snatches I caught of both channels last week - from what I can recall, it's still in Hit40UK too, so I'm guessing its life on commercial radio has still got a fair while to go.

Plus she was fairly bloody belting at the Superbowl.

Mids:

1 Lily - I take back everything I've previously said about her; great single and great album
2 GaGa - her PSB cameo was one of the few watchable things in last night's wretched Brits ceremony
3 Prodigy - surprised this has done so well and I'm not sure their new album is a Stunning Return To Form but not too bad
4 Alesha
5 Shontelle - both examples of slow burning "real" hits just as we used to have in the old days when it were all fields and Swinging Blue Jeans, The, around here
6 Eminem - put the blame on Fiddy, Mame, put the blame on Fiddy...
7 Beyonce
8 Tinchy
9 Morrison & Furtado
10 U2 - I wish they'd covered "Kick Your Boots Off" by Sisters instead (ask your dad); sounds like low-budget "Vertigo" crossed with "Subterranean Homesick Blues" and I haven't made my mind up about it yet

Miley C up to 14

In the albums Morrissey gets a hugely predictable number one with his dreary new album and the awful Empire of the Sun get hyped in at 7

awful Empire of the Sun get hyped in at 7

!

bless

Oldest trick in the book - rebrand a failing line (Sleepy Jackson), dress it up in new colours, call in a lot of PR/meejah favours and bingo! A "hot" "new" act!

I assumed U2 would be a lot higher. No wonder they were desperate to open the Brits.

1 Lily - I take back everything I've previously said about her; great single and great album

i know right! when i first heard it i was like, hmm not as bad as she usually is, but i still can't get with her voice - but that packing plastic/fucking fantastic couplet really caught my ear, and the way she delivers it is so razor sharp. and then last week i had to admit that the whole song is pretty great. i have the album but haven't dared listen to all of it yet though, some of the lyrics i've seen quoted look sort of retarded :/

I agree that a lot of the album lyrics look rather cringeworthy when you read them but the way she delivers them - comparatively relaxed, somewhat apologetic but still quietly very defiant - was a pleasant surprise. In the end her voice is definitely a love-it-or-hate-it thing but I think it works much better than it did on the first album. Given Greg Kurstin's involvement I suspect I'll have to hear the new Bird and the Bee album as well because I liked the first (?) one a lot.

I agree that a lot of the album lyrics look rather cringeworthy when you read them

Most pop/rock/whatever lyrics to thread

There's been an ongoing argument in our office as to whether those lyrics are brilliant or terrible (in particular the bit about being a weapon of massive consumption). I'm in the terrible camp.

Stevie T gave Lily's album one star in Uncut and he was previously a casual fan iirc

Ah yes, you can always rely on Uncut.

I find it quite difficult to take her lyrics seriously as well seeing as she was recently bigging up Boris for abolishing the congestion charge in West London.

Um, that palstic/fantastic rhyme is awful and obvious. Has British lyricism really sunk so low that THAT stands out?

The sun sets on the British Empire

i agree it's shit. always find her swearing really ineffective and somewhat trite - altho if she sounded more like TBATB's 'Fucking Boyfriend' then sweet xp

it's the way she delivers it rather than the line itself - for just a second it seems like that cockney street urchin façade slips and she intones it like a proper public school girl. it's funny cuz she means it to be ironic but it's actually true. i mean, obv the entire song would be better performed by paris hilton, but one takes what one can in the endlessly bleak british pop desert innit.

Yeh, Lex is right, I think -- it's all in the delivery. First time I heard it, I thought, OK, that's the worst line I'm going to hear all year. Subsequent listens suggest something rather less flippant/sneery going on.

No I think that Lex was right the second time - it would be better performed by Paris Hilton. The lyrics to her second single are just oh-look-what-I-just-said obnoxious.

I was walking down the street the other day and I saw a girl who looked exactly like LA and I reallyhad to right off a very strong reflex action to punch her in the face.

with your cock, amirite?

rebrand a failing line (Sleepy Jackson),

since the album spun off of Steele guesting on L'more and Mayes quite-successful-but-not-mega album and doing some shows with them, it's far more "temporarily rebadging Pnau for the MGMT audience" than rebranding Sleepy Jackson. it's not like Nations By The River made any impact, is it?

The other thing is that I'm really kinda meh on Greg Kurstin. What's he done that's so great? This is still the man responsible for Geggy Tah, a horror nearly up there with Ms Allen. The Bird & The Bee are pretty good but his writing for ver pop stars tends to leave me very cold.

ONE MONTH OF FEAR is completed, together with one month of "Just Dance" at number two. "Use Somebody" climbs back up to three off the back of the Brits, at a guess. The same Brits effect sees "PS Bono Is Wanking As He Writes This" arrowing in at... number 12. Ah. "Fly On The Wall" surges from the undrgrowth and sinks its teeth into number 16, with "Dead & Gone" rising to 17. Taylor Swift becomes the first country artist to chart in the UK, since, ooh, the X-Factor-powered return of Faith Hill last year (and before that? Ooh, probably "Over & Over"...) at 22, "Everybody" makes a rather welcome debut at 24, ahead of the distinctly less welcome Gary Go at 25. Incidentally, cross-promotional conspiracy theory:

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2009/Feb/Week3/15226957.jpg

http://itn.co.uk/news/story2fa00bf0b578719949173af801e42412_320x240.jpg

Also note preponderance of articles on Google News announcing that Take That have hand-picked "unknown" (this is used in pretty much every single one of the articles) singer Gary Go to support them on their forthcoming tour. Just a bit of a suspiscion, is all.

"Viva La Vida" gets a Brit-effect rebound to 27, and at 31 - HONEY RYDER! What do you mean, "Who?"? Do you not remember their number 32 smash hit "Numb" from August 2008? Srsly? Tchuh. Well, I suppose if no-one else is gonna keep their fingers on the pulse, I'll have to do it for them... Also, this being the third week of the month, that'll be time for another re-entry for "One Day Like This" (number 35 this go-round - and to think they used to use the duet with Richard Hawley as a selling point...), and "Token Jaunty Mark Owen Number" gets its first week in the top 40 at number 37. "The Promise" may or may not be a re-entry at 39, I can't recall.

Kings of Leon also re-soar in the album chart, back to number one, i'faith, ahead of Lallen and Morrissey. As you might expect, the Brit effect is rather more sizeable here: major reboundings for Duffy (4), Elbow (5) and Coldplay (15), obviously, but, rather less obviously, The Ting Tings bother the top 10 for the first time in ages at number eight. Estelle is not in the top 75, btw. That one shot of Seasick Steve in the audience at The Brits is good enough to propel his most recent one up 15 places to number nine; MGMT didn't even turn up but that's still good enough to get them back up to number 14. That quite good closing number affair parachutes PopArt back into the charts at number 19 from, roughly, nowhere, and puts The Killers at 6 and GaGa at 7. Empire Of The Sun's Making Up The Numbers is at 21, Miley Cyrus' album thing climbs from 70 to 30, and there's slight returns for one of the other Kings of Leon albums, Girls Aloud, Adele and N-Dubz between 36 and 39.

Oh, I remember Honey Ryder all right. They supported Will Young on his last tour, and someone else a few months earlier (Alison Moyet? I can't remember). Anyway... a bloody awful act. I lasted three songs at the Will show.

The guy out of Honey Ryder is some merchnat banker who quit and has been ploughing his dosh into a 'new model'pop career right?

Interesting how U2 became to this year's Brits what Adam Ant was to Live Aid.

Promote the new single which promptly tanks.

Available on physical and download and it's their worst first-single-off-the-album performance since 1983.

It's hard to see where they fit in anymore - Coldplay have the anthems, Kings of Leon have the rock, the Killers have the pop and Radiohead have the adventure and U2 are stuck in a limbo in the middle of them all.

And yet the Prodigy come back at exactly the same time and score a huge hit.

"Omen" is a bit Prodigy-by-numbers but it's catchy, it works and it sounds as though it has something to do with 2009.

Whereas I've heard "Boots" maybe two dozen times now and still can't remember any of it.

I am of course obliged to the Brit Awards for relieving me of the onerous duty of having to write about Years Of Refusal. Even the Kings of Leon sometimes have their uses!

xpost: Yup, Honey Ryder are a duo consisting of a former banker for Credit Suisse and a former MTV employee... ooh, CONSPIRACY!

U2 have been around for what seems like forever, and will be, until they die. Bit like the rolling stones, but with more actual effort put in.

"Boots" reminded be, yeah "Pump it up" and "subterranean", the middle bit is quite good though. But heck, it reminded me of another u2 single I couldn't recall (at the time)! And that says a lot of the generic nature of "the U2 single" of which "Boots", and "Elevation" (for it was that one) fall into. Then they produce something as "not bad" as "Stuck in a moment" and it's OK, sort of.

They are, really, Abba. The singles come out, as spaced out as they are, and you don't mind, really. But hearing themall in one go makes you go "Noo! Make it STOP!"

Over on IMM, there's an idea to 'replace' the U2 album with all songs penned by the respective artists with the same titles as the forthcoming U2 album. Seeing this, and having just downloaded 'songstar', I dashed off a lyric in 3 mins flat, and had a go. Then thought better of it and deleted it. Now I've heard the U2 song, I'm not sure mine's not better anyway.

Whereas I've heard "Boots" maybe two dozen times now and still can't remember any of it.

I've heard it a handful of times and it's stuck in my head. Not that it's any endorsement of its quality, juries still out on it. Don't know whether it's just a mess, chockful of hooks or something in between.

it's nice not having heard the U2 yet.

'Omen' is just Prodigy jacking Pendulum which is a sad state of affairs (or would be if i cared about them any more).

Interesting midweeks:

1 Kelly Clarkson (up from 103)
2 Taylor Swift (up from 22 - she's getting the big media push in the UK now for sure)
3 Lily
4 Leon & his Kings
5 GaGa - Just Dance
6 GaGa - Poker Face
7 T.I. & Justin
8 Shontelle
9 PCDs & Missy
10 Alesha

In the albums, the Prodigy at a comfortable #1 (rather more comfortable than Morrissey this time last week, as it turned out) with Lamb of God at 6 and Joe Bonamassa at 12 (is this the Mojo/Bob Harris/Johnnie Walker vote?).

I quite like Omen but it doesn't really sound like Pendulum at all.

it totally does palette-wise. they have some tracks with that kind of beat on their albums too.

REIGN OF FEAR ENDS; REIGN OF SUCK BEGINS as Kelly Clarkson gets her first-ever UK number one with a song that I'm torn between either quite liking or thinking "Nice job on making her sound like Nicki French, there". In something that I can't imagine anyone thinking would ever happen, Taylor Swift - Taylor Actual Frikkin' Swift - is at number two with her slightly uncomfortably zoomed close-up shots (it may just be me that thinks this, but the angle they shoot her from seems really weird), and then in further Gigantic Climber news Poke Of Face is at 3 and TI Knows He Said Some Things But That's The Old Him is at 4. Then Lillah and various other old stagers clutter up the rest of the ten (that Pussycat Dolls single with Missy Elliott is actually a thing, apparently).

Somehow, in the midst of all this upheaval, "Sex On Fire" is still at number 16, one ahead of Take That 'ave A Jolly Old Sing-Song. STILL-ON-TOP-WATCH - "Get On Your Boots" is at number 20.

And in the rest of the chart... erm... "Paper Planes" climbs again, which is, y'know, nice. Madcon re-enter at 35 despite not actually being the version of "Beggin'" used in that Adidas advert but never mind eh, and MGMT occupy both numbers 38 and 39.

Albums: PRODIGY R TEH CHAMPOINS, with KofL dislodged for one week only (probably). The Slumdog Millionaire OST climbs to 13, PopArt is actually up one place to 18, Erasure's Total Pop compilation (looks pretty but can't defend for toffee) is at 21, with Lamb of God, Joe Bonamassa and Connie Fisher occupying slots 25 to 27.

Erasure's Total Pop compilation (looks pretty but can't defend for toffee)

Also known as "Pop! 20 Hits", plus "Solsbury Hill" and a load of tracks you'll skip...

i've spent half the day with 'love story' on loop. what a fucking amazing song. especially weird as it underwhelmed initially, but once it clicks it REALLY clicks.

my life would not suck without 'my life would suck without you'. why is the clarkson trying so hard to prove how FUN!!11 and POP!!!11 she is, her best songs were all the dark and bitter ones on the last album :(

Lex I'm glad you've become a "Love Story" convert! It is weird how, for such an instant/"classic" seeming pop song it takes a few listens to click.

FFS:

1 - straight in - the fucking Saturdays. This fucking country.
2 Kelly C
3 Flo Rida Sings Dead Or Alive
4 GaGa (Poker)
5 Taylor Swift
6 TI/Justin
7 Lily
8 GaGa (Dance)
9 Shontelle
10 Leon & his Kings

In the albums U2 at number one but so far only 65,000 sold. At 11 the Answer and at 13 the Red Light Company.

I'll get me coat.

In the albums U2 at number one but so far only 65,000 sold.

Coulda sold more if record shop assistants weren't so intimidating and rude.

Lex I'm glad you've become a "Love Story" convert! It is weird how, for such an instant/"classic" seeming pop song it takes a few listens to click.

i've become a huge taylor convert over the past week (well, not convert - i just hadn't bothered to listen before, but w/the press ramping up over here, her albums finally fell into my letterbox). the entire fearless album is incredible. she has such a gift for a great denouement. on deadline so no time to write more, but frank and i have been talking about her on poptimists.

hey two amazing albums called fearless in the space of less than a year. hurrah for jazmine sullivan/taylor swift mindmeld.

also, no sign of princess nyah's 'frontline' in the itunes top 100. another UK funky fail :(

another UK funky fail

Would have made a better U2 album title.

Suggest Chart Ban on Comic Relief records.

ONCE AGAIN CARLIN SETS MORAL TONE FOR UK RECORD-BUYING PUBLIC as, by the shortest of short heads, Flo Rida pips The Saturdays to nab his first UK number one, and deny them theirs. Unless Wikipedia's fibbing, that's the first Comic Relief single to miss out on the top spot since "Absolutely Fabulous" back in 1994 (and the first in a year when the telethon takes place since "Stick It Out" in 1993). Other interesting things about this top 10 - none.

Aside from the top two, our highest new entry goes to... Chipmunk! Tis pity it's not, like, particularly good or anything, but "Chip Diddy Chip" wipes its feet, doffs its cap and enters at 21. "Sex On Fire" dips to 22 this week, so that's the cue for "Revelry" to come storming in with reinforcements at 29; Uninteresting New Lemar Single is at 31, and Beyonce's "Halo" being at 40 means that both she and the Kings of the Leon have three singles each inside this week's top 40.

In albums: U2 STILL ON TOP for first week. Red Light Company's £5.99 At HMV gets them to number 13, one spot ahead of All The Tina Turner That's Fit To Print. The Answer get to be the new Dragonforce, sort of, at 26.

Lex, do not underestimate Kelly's latest so fast. Fav tracks are "All I Ever Wanted", "Already Gone" and "Longshot", huge on dramatic bombast and closer to My December than what one would think by looking at the album cover.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MESS WITH CHARITY: Brydon & Jones' lustily crap take on "Islands in the Stream" puts Tom Jones on top for the first time since - who'd have thunk? - "Green Green Grass of Home", way back in 1966. Flossie slips to 2, meaning he's still exactly one position ahead of The Saturdays, whose failure to make number one last week may have very well set the seal on them being the new Rachel Stevens, if her career had consisted entirely of her cover of "More More More". Akon's new single gets to number 9, possibly by accident; even less conspicuously, it turns out that Oasis has a new single this week, too! It's at number 10, edging out "Just Dance", meaning that, for the first time in, er, a bit, there's only one Lady GaGa single in the top 10 ("Coming For To Carry My Poker Face", #4).

Elsewhere: September's had a second hit! Crumbs! "Can't Get Over" is YOUR number 14, people, with "Halo" climbing to number 20 in commemoration of this fact (First Day Covers will be available at Post Offices nationwide from tomorrow morning). After 74 weeks (approx.) outside the top 40, Katy Perry's After Singing A Ballad Now, Is She? finally makes its own wee breakthrough and is at 27. US teen synth-rock boys (i.e. they ugly) Metro Station have their one and only UK hit at 37 (will probably climb), and Your Actual Worst Single Of 2009 So Far, Annie Lennox's cover of "Shining Light", somehow drags its sorry ass to number 39 (will hopefully not climb).

Albums: U2 STILL ON TOP - TWO WEEKS OF DOMINANCE, THIRTY YEARS OF OMNIPOTENCE. Annie Lennox's The Collection gets to number two, one ahead of Kelly C. T-Swift is at number 5, one ahead of Faryl's One Hayley Westenra Is Never Enough. Big week for Very Best Ofs - Michael Ball is at 11, The Dubliners at 16, Everly Brothers at 23 - and that's obviously why Starsailor could only make number 26 with their new one. Lee Mead's second album - was he always on Fascination, btw? - creeps in at number 39.

Annie Lennox's cover of "Shining Light", somehow drags its sorry ass to number 39 (will hopefully not climb)

pretty scary cover too
http://www.chartstats.com/images/singles/34257.jpg

More on that Lee Mead album:

Highlights include the lead track from the album, "Nothing Else Matters", a duet with Hayley Westenra on "When The Stars Go Blue" and the Spandau Ballet classic, "Through The Barricades".

I am pretty tolerant of Westenra thanks to unpopular Nintendo Wii fish-molesting simulator Endless Ocean.

IN SHOPS TOMORROW:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51nsf5W9QkL._SS500_.jpg

HE HAS COVERED "I BELIEVE I CAN FLY"

Looking forward to Mrs Keating's answer record F U Right Back.

His mum's dead. Show some compassion.

F U Right Back From Beyond the Grave

job done.

The Comic Relief TOTP special, basically the show that would have been on (for the most part), had the show not been canned, specifically to showcase the two CR singles.

But oh! The Saturdays did not fulfil their part of the script! Instead, a bemused Flo Rider and crew get to perform the mandatory number one end-of-show song, and seemed to be the party record everyone enjoyed! How about that! TOTP lives and bites back!

And ends up being a much better 'final show' than the pony 'highlights' thing that was the real 'final' one.

Oh, and let us not forget Barry Gibb doing nothing perceptible on the record, but getting a co-performer credit on a number one hit to his name.

(Lay off the hair dye, wack!)

Robin Gibb, dammit!

didn't notice but last week's top 10 featured only 2 songs by male artists. maybe not a first but feels v unusual.

COMIC RELIEF "NOT FOR LIFE, JUST FOR CHRISTMAS" as "Barry Islands In The Stream" is unceremoniously dumped from number one by...

...

...

...

"Poke of Face", which hits the top spot having initially entered at number 30 fully nine weeks ago. I can't think of the last time it's taken a song that long to reach number one - the only one I can think of that comes remotely close would be "You're Beautiful", which went top in its seventh week on the chart.

Popular Comedy Foursome wind up directly swapping places with Popular Comedy Onesie, in fact, as they drop to three with Flossie hanging onto number two. Beyonce's tribute to converting old churches into shit nightclubs climbs to number nine; other than that, not much interesting going on in the top 10...

But outside it, well. A combination of the music of Printed Circuit, an androgynous redhead girl in a trenchcoat and probably the worst fake driving ever witnessed in music video history propels La Roux's "In The Kill" to number 11, three places ahead of Big Box Hollywood Star at 14. "Up All Night"'s steady irrelevance continues at 19, one place ahead of the stunningly rubbish Pussycat Dolls ft. Nicole Scherzinger (something tells me that name might not stick) "re-imagining" of AR Rahman's "Jai Ho!" As I so fearlessly predicted last week, Metro Station do indeed climb, all the way to 22; Franz Ferdinand have to do iPod ads now, and it gets them to 27; and Unnecessary Enrique/Ciara collaboration makes its way to number 30. One spot behind "Sex On Fire", which now looks certain to outlast its funny-smelling cousin, "Revelry", which is currently languishing at 37.

In the albums, the Mother's Day Champion Chase is won at a canter by - oh yes - Ronan Fucking Keating, crossing the line several lengths ahead of Annie Lennox, Kings of Leon and, er, Faryl, with long-time leader STILL ON TOP languishing back in sixth. Major sales bumps go to Bette Midler, who climbs 12 to number 9; The Saturdays, who are up 13 at 20; and Definitely 100% Super-Top Lionel Richie & The Commodores, up 22 to number 14 in order to celebrate the release of Lionel Richie's actual new album, Fuck Off, which lands at number ten. Peter Doherty - the Andrew Cole of indie - enters at 17 with I Think You'll Find William Blake Would Agree With Me, with Barry Manilow's Unprovoked Assault On The 1980s at 22 and New UCJ Thingy Melody Gardot at number 40.

the skream remix of that la roux track is really good - original is total pony though, and wtf is with her name? "la roux" MAKES NO SENSE ugh. i mean...why not la rousse?

rolling funky fail update: KIG's 'head, shoulders, knees & toes' enters at no 41. perempay & dee's massive 'in the air' finally gets a digital release, fails to bother top 75. i hate the stupid charts and stupid britishers blah blah blah

also, ne-yo's 'closer' took ages to get to no 1 too. polyhex says its chart run was:

22-24-12-7-5-3-2-{1}-2-4-6-4-6-8-11-12-16-22-27-26-28-33-37-42-46-55-63-65-68-66R(5)-62->31

Still just the eight weeks, mind; then again, I'd actually forgotten that ever got to number one at all...

La Roux (the singer at least)'s mum:
http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/42657000/jpg/_42657375_acklandlive_cut.jpg

NME bringing you the big stories first, comments section not entirely interested

Unnecessary Enrique/Ciara collaboration

"too much time on ilx"

Incidentally, this week sees "Use Somebody" racking up exactly half a year in the top 40. It's currently at number ten.

TWO WEEKS OF "POKER FACE" NOT REALLY INTERESTING ENOUGH TO PUT IN CAPS but never mind. GaGa gets a second week on top, anyhow, edging out The Noisettes, who get to be this year's reason for New Young Pony Club to act all huffy and such by dint of attempting to sell some car or other. They also get to be the only British act in this week's top ten; for god only knows what reason, JAY HURRRR is YOUR number five, and Metro Station make somewhat inevitable climb to number nine. Akon's "Gor Blimey, You're A Fetching Young Filly, Ain'tcher?" continues to have the number eight spot on lawk.

La Roux, tragiquely, reste at le numero eleven. Not even that freakishly uninteresting article in The Times' weekend magazine, where she and her music were basically equated to processed ham, could make the British public want "In For The Kill" more than "My Life Would Suck Without You". She does get to stay a nose in front of Unnecessary Remix Of "Show Me Love", though, as that debuts at 12, and at least she's not The Saturdays - "Just Can't Get Enough" is powerbombed from 4 to 14 this week. Back-to-back Lillah singles a bit lower down, as "Not Fair" enters at 16, one spot ahead of "The Fear", and then ROLLING UK FUNKY SUCCESS as KIG's "Head, Shoulderz, Kneez & Toez" debutz at 18. Unnecessary Enrique/Ciara Single is now at number 20.

Some kind of MP3 thing less popular than some kind of car is only possible explanation for Franz only climbing to 22; White Lies "still tedious", confirms #34; Jennnnnnnnifer Hudson gets her second hit at 37; and Asher Roth's "We May As Well Just Go Home Now" debuts at 40 to preface the worst summer in living memory.

On a similar note - Ronang is still top of the albums! Go belated Mother's Day! People still feeling the need to buy Kings of Leon and Lady GaGa albums sees Pet Shop Boys get nudged from the midweek summit down to number four; Lillah and Prodge make decent-ish climbs to 6 and 7, and at number eight, Akon's Freedom makes its first-ever top 10 incursion.

Lower down, residual climbs for Elbow and Fleet Foxes confirm them as top 40 fixtures from here to eternity; Royksopp's new one debuts at 21; James Morrison's first album resurfaces at 22; some sort of reissue of Pearl Jam's Ten is at 29; and Mastodon make it to number 34. Other than that, yeah, HMV sale or something, resulting in lots of climbs for things that have been around for aaaages, and a top 40 debut for Ladyhawke's album at 32.

I finally heard the Asher Roth/Lady Gaga by accident the other day (flatmate had radio 1 on while we played Pro Evo) and... I have to say, I love that we live in a world where I can hopefully just only hear these things once or twice in passing at most, a couple years ago I couldn't imagine a world where I wouldn't be hearing something like this all the time. 'Pokerface' is horrible, downright horrible. (Although if 1Xtra picks up the Roth in a big way I may quit general daytime radio forever.)

THR-THR-THR-THR-THREE WEEKS - NO, REALLY, "Poker Face" has been the UK's favourite song for three weeks now. It tops a hellishly uninteresting top ten, enlivened only by La Roux unconvincingly miming pulling out of a slipstream to make it up to number 7. Oh, and JAY HURRRR may possibly have a run at the top spot, having climbed to 3, just behind The Noisettes.

Under-under-under: Just Jack returns to the top 40. What a wondrous sentence that is, eh? "Embers" is at 17, and then, guess what? Jack Penate returns to the top 40! Yes, we all with the great stuff kids go for this week, and "Tonight's Today" is your number 23. Five places behind that - Doves! I am going to guess that Fearne Cotton is loving that (where that = "Kingdom of Rust", obv). Then Pink's second half-decent single in a row makes it to 31, four spots ahead of Flo Rida's second consecutive ignoring of a THIS IS NOT YOUR SKIP sign; and then, Lady Sovereign returns to the top 40! "So Human" gets all the way to number 38.

Under-under-under-under - "Untouchable" is knocking on the door at 41, while "Amy's Not At Her Desk Right Now, Can I Take A Message?" makes its first serious strides at 45, one ahead of Urgh James Morrison. Bat Of Lashes rises to 56 from 79 last week, but I can't see it going much beyond that; and Shontelle's done a song with Akon and it's at 72 oh joy.

SEXWATCH '09: "Sex On Fire" officially outlasts "Revelry" by climbing back to 27 while its sibling drops to 50.

ALBUMS: Oh look, Lady Gaga's number one there too, and the BBC seems very excited about that and I'm not quite sure why. Ronang drops to four, Annie climbs to three, and I would reckon you've probably already guessed Kings of Leon are number two. Flo Rida's A.C.R.O.N.Y.M. is highest new entry at five; second-highest would be Laughing Len at 19, then Peej and John Parish at 25, Metro Station at 35, and Gomez at 63. X amount of fun, X amount of laughter.

Gomez to become first band to win Mercury twice, calling it

Laughing Len at 19

really?

BRITISH POP "STILL ON TOP" - yup, Calvin Harris gets his first non-Dizzee-assisted number one, "I'm Not Alone" dislodging Poke Of Face after three bastard weeks, AND NOT ONLY THAT but La Roux storms up to number four in some kind of rubbish-eyewear double-whammy. And The Noisettes are still number five! Everything's alright forever! Lovely Sexy Magic zooms in at 6.

The Hillsborough memorial single is at 16, with Depeche Mode quite predictably entering at 24. Bat For Lashes gets a first-ever top 40 hit at 36 (from little acorns do MGMT grow), and, in further "what you've all been waiting for" news, James Morrison's follow-up to "Broken Strings" enters at 39, 21 spots behind its predecessor.

Lady Gaga is still Bestest at album-selling, tho, with Doves having to settle for second place. Bat For Lashes - literally EVERYWHERE this week - charts at 5, with YYYs at 3+3+3 (i.e. nine). For some reason Tapestry is at 12 - some kind of reissue thing? - and, for less reasons, Eoghan Quigg is at 14. Nu-Neil-Young at 22, Totally Best Of Ultravox Ever at 35.

The Tapestry reissue is even getting TV adverts unusually.

Oh, and "Is That Amy You'd Be Looking For, Then?" has climbed into the top 40 at 35.

Oddly enough, though, there's drops for "I Love College" (down to 41), "Sugar" (down to 35), and... "Untouchable", which is down to 42 from 41. I'm guessing that's down to it not being out physically yet, but I think that First Girls Aloud Single Not To Go Top 10 medal might just be finding a chest to get pinned on.

Elsewhere: Fightstar's not-exactly-any-good "Mercury Summer" is at 46, one ahead of Ercola's "Every Word". Two Miley singles - "The Climb" advanceth to 49, and "Hoedown Throwdown" (do not want to know) is new at 62. The Jools Holland Effect sends "Zero" rocketing to 68. There's another Basshunter single, and it's at 76, one ahead of "White Winter Hymnal", which is two ahead of The Prodigy's "Warriors Dance". Deadmau5 and Kaskade climb to 91, five spots ahead of Eoghan Quigg's reworking of "Get Off The Internet". Alexandra Burke's "Hallelujah" re-enters at 86.

ACTUAL FUCKING HISTORY RIGHT HERE PEOPLE: For the first time ever, a song with "Number 1" in the title has actually got to number one in the charts and it's Tinchy Stryder and hat-boy from N-Dubz wot done it. Congratulations to them and their pretty half-decent record. Having missed last week's chart (SECOND WEEK OF NON-ALONE-NESS is what I would have called it fwiw), I also missed La Roux soaring (painfully) to number two, which is where she/they stay this week, with The Calvinist slipping to number three. Yes, that's an all-British top three right there for the first time since... don't actually know, but I'll be going and checking ChartStats in a bit to find out, won't I? Yes I will. Aside from "We Made You" climbing to number five, nothing else of interest in the top 10, really.

BUT OUTSIDE THAT: Biffy Clyro offshoot Marmaduke Duke get the festival season started early, with "Rubber Lover" (YES SEE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE THERE) getting to number 12, one ahead of Pink Has Designs On Your Kneecaps, which is in turn three ahead of Miley Cyrus' "Maybe I Like The Misery". Prodigy's back-ness continues, with "Warriors Dance" getting to 18, and Keri Hilson has her first proper grown-up hit with "Return The Favor", at 20.

"Numa Numanenome" is at 22, Championg At Beer Pong re-enters at 26, one ahead of "A Personal Journey Through The Theme Tune From Tiny Planets With Girls Aloud", and Deadmau5 brings back the heyday of all chart dance acts being slightly dodgy Amiga-based animations (there was Usura, and... someone else), with "I Remember" finally breaching the 40 at 39 (one ahead of Bat For Lashes).

BUT OUTSIDE THOSE: Not posting last week meant missing Frankmusik's first top 40 hit, and this week it drops from 26 to 42. Sizeable-ish hoiks for "Hoedown Throwdown" (43) and Third Alesha Dixon Single (45). It would also appear that "Zero" peaked last week at 49 - it's at 64 this week :-(

It's another week of GAGA SMASH PUNY ALBUM CHART, not sure how long that makes it now but never mind eh. Depeche Mode have to settle for runner-up spot, Noisettes are at 7, Fightstar's Be Human (ewwwwwwwwwwwww) debuts at 20. And at 32 - CAMERA OBSCURA! Seriously! The Scottish ones! With the woolly hats! And the scowling! And such! Paul Morley's endorsement puts them six whole spots ahead of Asher "So Many Other Songs" Roth, with Entirely Necessary 10cc Best Of one spot further back. Lacuna Coil's Shallow Life (ewwwwwwwwwwwww) is at 43, and Christy Moore's new thing charts at 51. One behind Eoghan Quigg :-(

And the answer - 29th March 2008 ("American Boy" - "Mercy" - "Better In Time/Footprints In The Sand").

and?

lol at Gallows and Maccabees beating The Horrors in the LP charts.

Not much else happening, is there?

wonder if there will be any #1s this year that AREN'T a solo artist (either with/without guests). Comic Relief collectives don't count.

Black Eyed Peas, probably?

and of course the Manics with "Jackie Collins Existential Question Time"

Midweeks:

Singles

1 Dizzee Rascal 45.5k
2 Black Eyed Peas 22.4k
3 Alexander Rybak (Eurovision winner) 14.7k
4 Tinchy/N-Dubz 14.3k
5 Eminem 12.6k

Top 10
7 Daniel Merriwether

Top 15
Soulja Boy
15 Jade Ewen (UK Eurovision entry)

Top 30
Paolo Nutini
25 Yohanna (Iceland Eurovision entry)
Star Pilots
Green Day

Top 40
Keri Hilson
Eminem (Beautiful)
Alicia Keys (No One - Britain's Got Talent Effect Pt 1)

Top 50
Katy Perry
Asher Roth
50 Girls Aloud

Top 60
Alex Swings Oscar Sings (German Eurovision entry)
Kelly Clarkson

Top 70
Michael Jackson (They Don't Care About Us - Britain's Got Talent Effect Pt 2)
Waldo's People (Finnish Eurovision entry)
69 Urban Symphony (Estonian Eurovision entry)

Top 80
71 Lady GaGa (Paparazzi)
Beyonce (Diva)
Lenka

Albums

1 Eminem 63.9k
2 Green Day 23.7k
3 Manic Street Preachers 17.99k
4 Lily Allen 6.2k
5 Madness 5.5k

Top 15
11 Alesha
Jarvis Cocker
Tori Amos

Top 20
Steve Earle

The biggest Eurovision chart onslaught since 1974?

I didn't see the Icelandic entry, and the bit they showed seemed to be a random segment from somewhere in the middle. Was it really that good?

Rather a fine song, actually - conventional in format but she can certainly sing and there was a nice political subtext too.

WOW (and YAY) at that Eurovision chart invasion!

Non-scientific vox pop:

1. Yohanna's "Is It True?" (Iceland, #25) was my partner's favourite song from the first semi-final.

2. Alex Swings, Oscar Sings "Miss Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" (Germany, Top 60) was the unanimous favourite of the six neighbours whose dinner party I crashed to watch the voting.

3. The co-worker who sits opposite me now has Urban Symphony's "Rändajad" (Estonia, #69) as his mobile ring-tone.

Incidentally, the jury-only voting results have now been released. Same Top Two (Norway/Iceland), but Jade Ewen moves up to 3rd and France's Patricia Kaas moves up to 4th.

Is Micky Jackson gonna be #1 on Sunday and with what? Billie Jean?

http://cascadabiography.com/images/Cascada-07.jpg

I'm not sure any song getting to number one has made me this happy in quite a while.

Why is Man In The Mirror, of all Jacko songs, the one at #2?

It's the Michael Jackson single that can double as (auto)biographical whitewashed story of his life slash sentimental anthem for our times a la "Candle In The Wind"??

At least that's popular and not very disturbing (c.f. "Childhood").

i'd never heard 'man in the mirror' before i saw it was the most popular on the charts. it's not great, is it.

i also didn't know until last week that the woman on 'in the closet' is PRINCESS STEPHANIE OF MONACO.

'stranger in moscow' would've been a far better autobiographical ballad choice

i also didn't know until last week that the woman on 'in the closet' is PRINCESS STEPHANIE OF MONACO.

LOL, whatever happened to etc... "Man in the Mirror" does seem to be a favourite among Jackofans

I think the position is reversed for most people though lex - they know "Man In The Mirror" very well but wouldn't recognise "Stranger In Moscow" (as fantastic as it is).

I saw "Man in the Mirror" done as a fabulous piano soul number on Australian Idol a few years back.

yeah, my first MJ memories are his 90s material and i only bothered acquiring bad last week.

it does seem that the off the wall stuff is doing oddly badly in comparison to everything else.

I like "Man in the Mirror" a lot and it's sufficiently jaunty. "Stranger in Moscow" would have been too dark, plus not his most popular era, as Tim says.

x-post Pre vs Post "King of Pop". Most of the coverage seems to skip from "Ben" to the first ten seconds of "Don't Stop Til You Get Enough" to "Billie Jean".

Also you'd think the only singles on Thriller were "Billie Jean", "Beat It" and the title track.

'ben' is probably the biggest MJ hit i've never heard

I used to play it on the jukebox in my local boozer every time I went in, I was really popular

Ben still makes me cringe, actually.

That's rattist.gif

i wish Chart Stats guy would update his site quicker.

not particularly interesting but seemingly every site that lists the chart is pretty wretchedly designed (including the official CIN site's and yahoo uk music's) like they just converted an Excel spreadsheet to HTML and couldn't be bothered to dress it up or at least make it clearer.

'Man in the Mirror' probably best fits the MJ vision people would like to believe - flawed but with plenty of hope, or something like that - rather than the vision put forward by the nutso odes to paranoia and so on.

I try to be a good poptimist but the idea of Cascada being good is a few steps beyond my understanding.

cascada are just impossible to care about either way

prob still the 3rd or 4th best no 1 of the year so far though *cries*

was almost tempted to listen to Radio 1 on Sunday evening to see how they'd actually go about playing all the Jackson songs - whether they'd keep making light of this or try and play it down, or just only play some of them (did they actually play the 4 in a row?)

seriously over halfway through the year and LILY FUCKING ALLEN has made my favourite UK no 1 - this cannot be permitted to continue

also, wherefore the summer anthems?

(xpost) They played all of them. And before each one, there was a short clip from a celebrity/musician (Pete Tong, etc.) saying how much said track meant to them.

plus kinda want Jackson to destroy the charts in this way - sort of interesting to see how long it will take for the songs to drop back out of the 40

also, wherefore the summer anthems?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKEtHp-qJxc

;)

surely it's a prerequisite of a summer anthem that it has to be halfway decent

that is one lame stock photo cover

It's a bit like one of those enormous wallpaper mural things.

Xpost to Lex: I've *loved* this year's run of Number Ones - best in years! Comic Relief and Pixie Lott have been my only duds.

lily allen accidentally stumbling on her first and so far only good song and the black eyed peas on autopilot have been the only NON duds. i really hate the cheapo electro trebly sound that apparently is the hallmark of "pop" now. i wish taylor swift had got to no 1.

i like the ~idea~ of dizzee and tinchy being no 1 artists, the latter totally unexpectedly, but it's with material which is just so shoddy compared to what they're capable of

Ah, OK, that explains it - I'm a total sucker for those cheapo electro noises.

They appear to have permeated almost everything this year to an almost unprecedented level. I think the industry has cottoned onto them as the ultimate faux-unifying force.

'Bonkers' doesn't seem particularly trebly - probably why i quite like it now

'bonkers' is lame for difft reasons - actually it's not even that bad, there's the hint of an amazing banger in it, except it just sounds like all concerned gave up 5% into the process

^^^^ Such a spot on description.

Apparently this scottish band might be denting the charts with the summers big novelty hit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ta-Z_psXODw

think its got a chance?

Jacko still dominating the top 40?

"Man In The Mirror" is at #3, every other MJ track has slipped down 10-15 places from last week. Still ten songs in total, plus a Jackson 5 cut.

As for Alestorm, they might just be the Joe Dolce in a chart full of MJ tributes, MJ re-releases, and other acts who are just treading water.

What might prevent it doing well is the vocals. But ilm will always get behind a keytar.

"Man In The Mirror" is at #3, every other MJ track has slipped down 10-15 places from last week. Still ten songs in total, plus a Jackson 5 cut.

― how wide is a lawnmower? (snoball), Sunday, 12 July 2009 18:47 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

"They don't care about us" is up places, the rest are down.

Still, the top ten albums are dominated (6 albums are MJackson)..

Of the wall the lowest position?

"Who's Lovin' You" is also up from 118 to 36, following repeated mentions/archive footage at the MJ tribute show.

Other post-tribute bounces (outside the Top 40, in descending order): "Heal The World", "I'll Be There", "Will You Be There", "Human Nature", "Smile", "We Are The World".

just wait for the Alestorm cover version of Beat It.

Beat It, Wench