Let an EXCELSIOR be an EXCELSIOR, and let sleeping LOLS lie

http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/2/3/128782015302773065.jpg

LOL ... in my EXCELSIOR?

Hey, ILX, This Is Your Boyfriend!

So anyway:

--

I really would like to write one about Siamese Dream, but its been pitched to death so it seems like the publishers aren't interested for whatever reason.

― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Friday, January 27, 2012 8:48 AM (4 minutes ago)

with good reason.

― scott seward, Friday, January 27, 2012 8:49 AM (2 minutes ago)

damn, my self-imposed "no pumpkins bashing" rule gets broken over and over on ilm. please forgive me. but i blame anyone who mentions them, really.

― scott seward, Friday, January 27, 2012 8:50 AM (1 minute ago)

love you, ned.

― scott seward, Friday, January 27, 2012 8:51 AM (1 minute ago)

Germany and Jamaica can be a bit disappointed with their performance - the tabloids at home are photoshopping the manager's face onto a turnip.

― Matt DC, Friday, 27 January 2012 09:41 (11 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

who r u

― markers, Friday, January 27, 2012 11:17 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

who who
who who

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Friday, January 27, 2012 11:17 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

oh, well that i can explain i think. an unexpected scene developed friday night as president barack obama saw a destitute man on a bench in front of the white house and did not care at all. as every president in the history of the united states quickly gathered around, a group including some founding fathers, ronald reagan and abraham lincolin expressed outrage at obama's indifference. the president took the constitution in his hands, said "it's words on paper. to hell with this pathetic "country". speaking for america, let me apologize to the rest of the world, and particularly europe, for our actions over the last hundred years. i love the united nations and want a one world government", and then stood defiantly on top of the priceless document. a gang of badboys including bill clinton, george w bush, a miraculously sturdy franklin delano roosevelt and his distant cousin theodore roosevelt, stood behind obama in support, clapping loudly and using foul language. mysteriously, a large number of dollar bills covered the ground between the presidents, destitute man, and the loose pages of the constitution. no one thought to collect them and give them to the man on the bench.

― SELF DEPORTATION (Z S), Friday, January 27, 2012 7:29 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

hahaha where is that?

lolz thread

Whoa, taking a bow for ZS

I was in the middle of trying to figure out what the clusterfuck was about when I was pulled up abruptly by this.

besides some references to things more deep-seeded in black culture

NOT "DEEP-SEEDED." THE PHRASE IS "DEEPLY SEATED." "DEEP-SEEDED" IS THE RESULT OF PEOPLE HEARING THINGS WRONG AND THEN TYPING AS THOUGH THEY HAD UNDERSTOOD WHAT THEY HEARD. THANK YOU.

― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Friday, January 27, 2012 6:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I could care less

― frogs you are the dumbest asshole (frogbs), Friday, January 27, 2012 7:17 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

loool

haha

10/10

guys, turns out the origin of aids was actually a guy screwing a monkey

― lag∞n, Sunday, January 29, 2012 9:30 AM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

can someone please change this thread title to "origin of AIDS (SPOILERS)"? thanks.

― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Sunday, January 29, 2012 9:41 AM Bookmark

Quality posts all over that AIDS thread:

http://www.nashvillescene.com/pitw/archives/2012/01/26/stacey-campfield-on-the-origins-of-aids-it-was-one-guy-screwing-a-monkey

Most people realize that AIDS came from the homosexual community — it was one guy screwing a monkey, if I recall correctly, and then having sex with men. It was an airline pilot, if I recall. My understanding is that it is virtually — not completely, but virtually — impossible to contract AIDS through heterosexual sex...very rarely [ transmitted ]. What's the average lifespan of a homosexual? it's very short. Google it yourself."

best use of "IIRC" ever.

― flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Friday, January 27, 2012 5:02 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I live in Brighton for the record. Wandering through Crawley on the way to the train station on Friday.

Boy: 'You're not gettin' none of my wages ya slag'

Girl: 'You should have though of that when you were spunkin' in me ya cunt'

― Yeah Yeah Bohney (Craigo Boingo),

mayne you just will not know yr audience

'not have known', obv

career predictions plz

― the boy with the gorn at his side (Edward III), Wednesday, January 18, 2012 12:06 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

porn, porn, snuff films

― lana shel game (some dude), Wednesday, January 18, 2012 1:12 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

you can't really pluralize that

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Wednesday, January 18, 2012 1:13 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

what if shes the key grip of several snuff films

oh shit

― lag∞n affiliated (The Reverend), Monday, January 30, 2012 1:55 AM (11 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

otm

― bear, bear, bear, Monday, January 30, 2012 2:22 AM (11 hours ago)

hahaha

In re: Pomplamoose

--

http://www.pomplamoose.com/img/phptSudgAPM.jpg

― am0n, Monday, January 30, 2012 12:32 PM (59 minutes ago)

^^Two Real Lights

― Lady Writer, Male Seether (C. Grisso/McCain), Monday, January 30, 2012 12:37 PM (54 minutes ago)

two whites

― am0n, Monday, January 30, 2012 12:46 PM (45 minutes ago)

Tumblr Whites

― Lady Writer, Male Seether (C. Grisso/McCain), Monday, January 30, 2012 12:54 PM (38 minutes ago)

i dunno if its possible to make a comment about that picture that is better than the picture itself

true

She is making the worst face fyi

idk she's just doing a closed-mouth smile; if both of them had that expression we'd all be like "ugh they're standing at a whimsical angle smh." it's really his :D :D :D face that drives it over the top into madness

I recognize that fence.

She is making the worst face fyi

― polyphonic, Monday, January 30, 2012 11:40 AM (47 minutes ago)

except for his, I agree

http://oi42.tinypic.com/2cysn76.jpg

something for the IA thread is people who make that face in every photo who are not in Pomplpmouse

I don't know who she is but I'd do her.

Damnit ;_;

to be fair

hers says "I wuv my hubby"
his says "Though I am ostensibly goofing, I am actually suffocating in this heterosexual relationship"

his is at least honest

LBI do i have a treat 4 u: So who ARE that insufferable indie couple in the new Hyundai TV ads?

Oh dear... Still tears, but retracting my ws remark tbh ;_;

she looks like Maggie Gyllenhaal post brain-surgery in that pic

he has dinosaur teeth

scary

Do you feel blame? Are you mad? Uh, do you feel like wolf kabob Roth vantage? Gefrannis booj pooch boo jujube; bear-ramage. Jigiji geeji geeja geeble Google. Begep flagaggle vaggle veditch-waggle bagga?

― am0n, Tuesday, January 31, 2012 7:42 AM (34 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

compare street etiquette dudes selling vintage pieces on parkandbond.com, where we find the following caveat in every product description:

Please note that any distressing is a desirable aspect of this one-of-a-kind vintage piece

― i think this is serious (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, January 31, 2012 11:58 AM (22 minutes ago)

well, if i ever need to date again i've got my angle sorted.

― teaky frigger (darraghmac), Tuesday, January 31, 2012 12:16 PM (4 minutes ago)

it's even funnier if you read the word "angle" as a (curved penis) double entendre.

O.O

i'm quite bad enough without imputed further impropriety tyvm

flag post sitta

― am0n, Tuesday, January 31, 2012 5:40 PM

XD XD

from "summarize your 'look' today in 4 words or fewer"

why won't he shave

― SELF DEPORTATION (Z S), Saturday, January 28, 2012 4:21 AM (4 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If you haven't heard any Ivor Cutler, get one of his records, they're all really funny, especially Ludo (where "I'm Happy" and "Good Morning How Are You Shut Up" come from) and Life From A Scotch Sitting Room.

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, March 7, 2006 8:32 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm happy
I'm happy
Dead

― satan (dog), Thursday, March 9, 2006 10:17 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Text of OPD scanner: "OAKLAND - ) OPD REQUEST FULL SCALE MULTI COUNTY TACTICAL ALERT FOR RIOT IN PROGRESS. 500+ SUBJECTS IN AREA. [SFO024]"

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 26 October 2011 04:58 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Text of OPD scanner: "OAKLAND : - ) OPD REQUEST FULL SCALE MULTI COUNTY TACTICAL ALERT FOR RIOT IN PROGRESS. 500+ SUBJECTS IN AREA. [SFO024]"

― iatee, Wednesday, 26 October 2011 04:59 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

wooooooah

ha that took a second for me to catch

(told a dude earlier today in committee "i was throwing rocks at starbucks windows when you were learning multiplication tables, don't tell me i don't know what radical politics are" and then kind of wanted to kill myself)

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 26 October 2011 05:16 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

THROWing ROCKS
at the
STARBUCKS

......................revolution

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 26 October 2011 05:17 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i was steeling starbucks wifi when you were drinking crystal pepsi kid

― ice cr?m, Wednesday, 26 October 2011 05:18 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

we live in ~interesting tymes~

― lol waggoner (am0n), Wednesday, 26 October 2011 05:19 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

iatee post is alltime tho

Wait you mean 'Underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned' isn't LJ?

― Matt DC, Wednesday, February 1, 2012 3:48 AM (9 hours ago)

yah, i liked that one too.

the net significance of any given poster's fup should be inversely proportional to the number of fups they hand out

― his hands are a dirty fountain through which lives spurt (contenderizer), Wednesday, February 1, 2012 2:00 PM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Thank you, Paul McCartney.

― pplains, Wednesday, February 1, 2012 2:01 PM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'd choose a life where dreams come true, but just this week I dreamed that the copier at work was located at O'Hare airport, so I can't risk it.

― garbage corn fan (Je55e), Thursday, 2 February 2012 05:50 (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

hahaha that's great

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "it depends"

― congratulations (n/a), Thursday, February 2, 2012 10:21 AM (53 minutes ago)

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "it depends"

depends on the question

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, February 2, 2012 10:22 AM (52 minutes ago)

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "depends"

What does 90 year old pussy smell like?

― Quand le déshonneur est public, il faut que la vengeance soit (Michael White), Thursday, February 2, 2012 10:23 AM (51 minutes ago)

points off for changing the wording of my post to make the joke work

Accepted. Had to be done, though

None other than Lou Reed told that joke to a photographer friend of mine!

And when he used to retell the joke, he would always say "It depends"!

(The photog that is)

It took a while, but I just *got* that Paul McCartney one...

<3333333333333333333333333

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 October 2011 02:48 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

what is that? a loving human centipede?

― sarahel, Friday, 28 October 2011 02:56 (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah i've gotten a flurry of emails this week asking me to approve comments on "best gucci mane songs of 2008"

one was just "I got a big gun"

― J0rdan S., Thursday, February 2, 2012 5:37 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

From ILX Milk Carton. Re: Geir

he still has about 20 years to go with his "1001 Songs..." polls. I wonder if someone else should take over the duty.

― The I-Need-a-Cure Singers (unregistered), Friday, February 3, 2012 3:18 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the things they carried

― J0rdan S., Friday, February 3, 2012 3:20 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

loool

only person in the vanity fair pic i recognized is sophia vergara

― the arm (NZA), Friday, 3 February 2012 20:34 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

and that is by far the least ws picture of her ever wtf

― the arm (NZA), Friday, 3 February 2012 20:35 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

um

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Friday, 3 February 2012 20:35 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

she's not in that photo shoot

― encarta it (Gukbe), Friday, 3 February 2012 20:36 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

and scene

― lag∞n, Friday, 3 February 2012 20:38 (1 hour ago) Bookmark

What if someone googles your nameand it finds your post where you said "clits is nice"

― The Cheerfull Turtle (Latham Green), Friday, February 3, 2012 9:30 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Then they'd be all I need to get to know this stud.

― Unleash the Chang (he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Friday, February 3, 2012 9:38 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha brady walked up to kraft during training camp his rookie season introduced himself and said 'im the best decision you ever made'
― lag∞n, Friday, February 3, 2012 8:21 PM

god fuck that guy
― mookieproof, Friday, February 3, 2012 8:22 PM

lol he was right tho
― lag∞n, Friday, February 3, 2012 8:23 PM

eli walked up to steve tisch during training camp his rookie season introduced himself and said 'did you know some dinosaurs used their long necks to eat plants from the tops of trees?'
― pplains, Friday, February 3, 2012 8:33 PM

yeah we don't know what the fuck you're talking about

― this is funny u bitter dork (forksclovetofu), Sunday, January 22, 2012 6:14 PM (1 week ago)

thats smdh at forks not at mookie, obv

― Number None, Friday, February 3, 2012 12:13 PM (4 hours ago)

^^77 off of 77

see u in 60, bro

where are y'all stealing games on the internet nowadays

crap, forgot that thread was on 77

The Happiest Wives in America?
By Maggie Gallagher
February 3, 2012 9:44 P.M. Comments3
In my syndicated column this week, I take a break from politics to ask: Just who are the happiest wives in America?

(Hint: Ann Romney, Rick Santorum, and Carol Paul are all examples).

― JoeStork, Saturday, February 4, 2012 2:47 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cool

this display name is the crying eagle of ILX

― https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0 (dayo), Saturday, February 4, 2012 4:24 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

pwned

I think that was intentional

mh feeling his oats even though it's done by a dumb regex, not in code.

I think that was intentional

― https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0 (dayo), Saturday, February 4, 2012 4:39 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

btw I meant I got rickrolled

what if you are just as close to God here as you would be in Heaven.

― pplains, Monday, 6 February 2012 05:32 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's what those last three made me ask myself.

― pplains, Monday, 6 February 2012 05:32 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so weird to think about a god that is everywhere at once, all knowing. i mean, yeah it's obvious, but that's completely fucked up.

― Z S, Monday, 6 February 2012 05:40 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

when you have sex, god is having sex with itself, experiencing it from both ends. weird.

― Z S, Monday, 6 February 2012 05:41 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

In fact they get extra brownie points for carrying that heavy cross of homosexuality and avoiding the temptations!

― Frobisher (Viceroy), Monday, February 6, 2012 11:21 AM (6 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

when youre feeling gay its important to do things to take yr mid off it like go to the park or get out and stretch yr legs a little at a rest stop maybe splash some water on yr face in a public restroom

― lag∞n, Monday, February 6, 2012 8:25 AM (31 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Confirms my notion that every other thread on ILX gets more gay action than the gay thread.

Well that exchange came from the Republican thread so duh.

these guys and their insular weird culture depress me!

*pops champagne to inaugurate 10th year of posting on message board*

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Monday, February 6, 2012 10:47 AM (20 minutes ago)

What's ironic about chasing girls and cocaine into backrooms of clubs? haven't we all done that when we were young?

― JacobSanders, Monday, February 6, 2012 12:55 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well I did it ironically

― iatee, Monday, February 6, 2012 12:58 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^ startled my wife by laughing out loud at that

i'd forgotten that music is half a really amazing album (and half totally inessential but whatever). "impressive instant", "paradise (not for me)", "runaway lover">>>>>>>

― first period don't give a fuck, second period gon get cut (lex pretend), Monday, February 6, 2012 1:31 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah it's good, not "kaputt" good, but def good

― dave coolier (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Monday, February 6, 2012 1:36 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ggnnnnnggghhhh

― first period don't give a fuck, second period gon get cut (lex pretend), Monday, February 6, 2012 1:41 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahahaaaaa

yeah that's never gonna not be funny

ka

http://www.downfallguild.org/sites/www.downfallguild.org/files/images/poot.jpg

I assumed for this whole discussion "drone" meant a plane w/ missiles on it. Why else would you have one?

― Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, February 7, 2012 2:19 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

snacks

― Unleash the Chang (he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Tuesday, February 7, 2012 2:20 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmeow.........

― garbage corn fan (Je55e), Tuesday, February 7, 2012 3:51 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha

my father was a musician at disneyland on-and-off from the early eighties to ~2004, so my sisters and i spent a lot of time there + had a bunch of people in our peer group who worked there. i've probably told this story on ilx before, but i took a college creative writing course with one of the guys who played Goofy; he was very tall and strange and every story he submitted had something to do with infant and/or child murder.

― ban opinions (reddening), Tuesday, January 24, 2012 4:24 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

moral of the story: stay away from Goofy

― Full Frontal Newtity (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, January 24, 2012 4:26 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

garsh

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Tuesday, January 24, 2012 4:28 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i took a college writing course with a tiny girl who played mickey/minnie mouse at disneyworld, she said drunks were prone to either punching mickey or trying to put their hand up minnie's dress, she said the minnie costume was fairly molestation-proof but the mickey punches could hurt quite a lot.

^^ kind of lol but mostly sad

i was chuck e cheese when i was in high school and let me tell you that kids will run up and punch you in the balls as hard as they can and parents think it's funny. What i discovered was that Chuck E's hard plastic head could be used as a weapon so when i saw a manic seven year old running up to "hug" Chuck E, Chuck E would lower his head and "kiss" the seven year old with a slight wallop to the face. Cue screaming kid. Cue mama saying "Chuck E didn't mean to hurt you". Bullshit on that mama, keep your kid away from my gonads.

I was also the pig at Piggly Wiggly for two horrible weekends. Standing outdoors in the summer heat with assholes throwing empty beer cans while you stand outside waving and exploring the wonderful world of heat exhaustion.

And the only other time I ever did the furry thing again was when I was talked into putting on a tiger costume and palling around backstage with CeeLo and Dangermouse after a Gnarls Barkley show for an MTV promo. At one point I arm wrestled Cee-Lo for the camera. Dude got some short arms.

I feel so much lighter having divested myself of all this information.

im not sure what to do w/this

literally every time cee-lo is on tv my girlfriend points out how short his arms are

all the above is true btw! especially carlito's lil t-rex arms.

I have always been way to distracted by cee-lo's teeth to notice his arms tbh.

I had to be the Easter bunny at the mall once (I was photographer, bunny didn't show, kids needed a bunny, that was me) and a kid pooped in my paw but I couldn't say anything b/c Easter bunny doesn't talk.
Memories.

and a kid pooped in my paw

o_O where was your hand dawg

I was holding a baby while wearing a full bunny suit. I couldn't see very well.

lol. thats hella gross. hope they at least let you...um...dispose of it.

lil brown egg

To his credit, he was wearing a diaper and the costume was not compromised.

a friend of mine when I was a kid used to be Y0gi Bear at Universal Orlando (like shortly after it opened) and one day she was walking to meet a gaggle of children to take pictures and the kids ran over to say hello and for some reason she tripped and fell and her Yogi head came off and started rolling down the street as kids screamed in horror.

lol

hahaha

that story makes me happy

LL's story and the Yogi story had me giggling just now

you haven't lived til you've crapped in a bunny's paw

or had your paw crapped in

it was just first time too, usually i took the photos and this big weird guy named sean was the bunny, but sean didn't show that day. the customer service girl had to take the poloroids while i wore the suit. it was actually pretty relaxing aside from the deposit in my palm.

these stories of mascot/animal-costumes-gone-wrong are making me happy even tho i'm sorry that any of you ever had to dress up in such disturbing ways

a friend of mine had a job where he had to stand on the sidewalk, holding a sign, dressed like as a clown (for a car wash i think). he quit on day 2 after someone started taking shots at him from the apartment complex across the street with a bb gun.

crap in a bunny's paw and you get two more wishes

At one point I arm wrestled Cee-Lo for the camera.

I arm-wrestled MIA once, FYI.

who won

I wonder what the kid's two other wishes were for

1) get me out of this poopy diaper stat
2) ??
3) never make me touch that filthy beast again as long as I live

#2 is presumably "profit"

I wish I could post the best naked-baby photo ever - my friend's sister has her newborn (or infant? I don't know what you call them after a few weeks) laying across her folded arms, she and her husband are dressed up for the sitting, etc.. But the sister's face is screwed up like she's about to cry, the husband is trying to not lose his shit laughing, and then you see the trickle running down her arm - the baby had just shit all over her.

Brown bunny.

all right mookie and nickn. stop making humorous posts in the excelsior thread.

@twooldridge
Trent Wooldridge
Remember that time the 6ft plush Trix Rabbit high-fived your kid in Kroger and you had freaky nightmares the next 3 days? #sotired

I arm-wrestled MIA once, FYI.

which MIA, we need to make sure we post in the appropriate thread!

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20120202125922AAZGjC5

how is babby t-rex formed

http://s7.postimage.org/3wjwe72mj/wee_lo.jpg

before "a", I got "gay / Gnarls Barkley/ blind"

Old, but..

total bastard has a life-changing experience and vows to be completely nice from then on

― painini (admrl), Wednesday, 11 August 2010 20:02 (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh i did that

― sarahel, Wednesday, 11 August 2010 20:04 (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

who won

She did.

I am still laughing from the Yogi bear story.

I'm a dwarf I'm a reverend
I'm a midget I'm Al Green's son
I'm a sinner I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed

lol

Instrumental classical music SUCKS. Get back to your job of making bangin' tracks for Opera divas to sing over.

this is OTM tho

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Wednesday, February 8, 2012 1:57 PM (25 minutes ago)

careful what you wish for

http://www.allflac.com/covers/b_21917_Bill_Laswell-Operazone__The_Redesign-2000.jpg

― the third kind of dubstep (Jordan), Wednesday, February 8, 2012 2:01 PM (21 minutes ago)

omg Jordan, that is on Spotify

I think I am in for a treat

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Wednesday, February 8, 2012 2:02 PM (21 minutes ago)

;_; I was wrong ;_;

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Wednesday, February 8, 2012 2:21 PM (2 minutes ago)

lol

Well-seasoned douchecanoe seeks quiet doormat with just the right amount of sluttiness for LTR

― carl agatha, Wednesday, February 8, 2012 1:38 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Just in case we'd forgotten his Arsenal tattoo:

Born in London's east end in 1947, he supported Arsenal as a boy, spending his weekends on the terraces at Highbury.

http://www.channel4.com/news/harry-redknapp-footballs-cockney-rebel

― James Mitchell, Thursday, 9 February 2012 06:35 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

His whole weekends?

― Monkee Trial (Nasty, Brutish & Short), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:06 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they was ard times son

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:09 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shivering on the terrace at ighbury waiting for the all clear to sound

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:10 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

bat people was friendlier then too, you could leave your front door open and when you got ome somebody would've slipped a undred grand totally legal payment under the doormat

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:11 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they only ever bunged their own

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:11 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the dear old queen mam used to cam dahn the ighbury all the time shaking ands and anding out bags of sand to teary-eyed street urchins

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 9 February 2012 07:15 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_AXhWXW1FFeA/TBy-E_KIkCI/AAAAAAAAIxE/4zBwLqKPryc/s1600/royals+laughing.jpg

i'm totally shocked at this reaction from a school where 98% of the student population actively practices a religion that actively had a "black people can't get into heaven" clause until 1978

― dave cool, Thursday, February 9, 2012 9:13 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm furious that black parents would send their kids into that environment with little to no knowledge of their own history, if for no other reason because all of those white kids are going to be turning to them to ask questions like "what do your people think of slavery" and "what was it like growing up on welfare"

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Thursday, February 9, 2012 9:21 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

god i feel guilty right now for wanting to say "incidentally, DJP, I've been meaning to ask you..."

― Alshipleyan Goalpostmover (some dude), Thursday, February 9, 2012 9:29 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so, what lessons did we learn from this entire phenomenon?

― ⚓ (gr8080), Thursday, February 9, 2012 1:18 PM

i learned that mods are still dicks years after i hung up my lawyer badge

― max, Thursday, February 9, 2012 1:19 PM

*gazes forlornly at badge hook*

― lag∞n, Thursday, February 9, 2012 1:19 PM

giving up politics on ILE & Facebook for Lent

― Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Thursday, February 9, 2012 1:39 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

god bless you my son

would suggest removing everything from room, finished plan should be similar to this:

http://etc.usf.edu/clipart/40600/40690/pb_sq_40690_md.gif

― I DIED, Wednesday, February 8, 2012 12:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Might be reading this completely wrong, but The Glorious Land sounds like a call-and-response/dialogue (possibly between anthropomorphic embodiments of England and America). The "Oh America / Oh Eng-er-land" refrain sounds like the two states are in the midst of a sexual act, but the tone shifts on the last line to scolding: "Oh, America!". It's as though America climaxed and then England, disgusted, is saying hypocritically "Look what you've done, shameful! Clean up this mess. You can sleep in the wet spot tonight", even though she was largely responsible for goading America on in the first place.

I also like how there's no response to "How is our glorious land bestowed" - just a silence.

― Laughing Gravy (dog latin), Friday, February 10, 2012 11:38 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I would rather picture the muddy, bloody corpses of the fallen at Gallipoli than America and England fucking.

― Suede - the fabric, not the band (DL), Friday, February 10, 2012 11:44 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

both valid pov's imo

In re: Schoolboy Q:

--

i like some of his songs, still think it's weird/disheartening when a rapper uses the word "fags" and no one seems to think it's a problem, not really interested in a big discussion about it because i know it's been talked to death but i'm just tired of it. sorry.

― congratulations (n/a), Thursday, February 9, 2012 2:01 PM (Yesterday)

cosign n/a's post. otoh most of the music I listen to is dudes talking about who they're going to kill & with what gas-powered garden tool so glass houses I guess

― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Thursday, February 9, 2012 9:08 PM (Yesterday)

Aero's got a gun

from the whitney housten rip thread:

would not want to be in a karaoke bar tonight.

― pplains, Sunday, 12 February 2012 01:29 (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

a modest lol but still a irl lol

Haha I just came here to post that ^

i read that after i had just sat down at one and irl loled.

there must be eleven dozen books that use the title palimpsest

― Aimless, Sunday, February 12, 2012 3:04 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's almost gross

― high five delivery device (Abbbottt), Sunday, February 12, 2012 3:05 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ip law : libertarians :: honey : vegans

― iatee, Sunday, February 12, 2012 11:35 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you know what they say a libertarian is a vegan whos been covered in honey

― lag∞n, Sunday, February 12, 2012 11:37 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

How many old white male guitarists can we get on a stage

― curmudgeon, Sunday, February 12, 2012 11:29 PM (36 seconds ago)

Broken Social Security Scene

― Evan, Sunday, February 12, 2012 11:32 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

p good

Do you actually suffocate if all your skin is painted and sealed off from this oxygen-bearing world?

― one little aioli (Laurel), Monday, February 13, 2012 10:52 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yes, if at the same time u do not breathe through your mouth/nose

― lag∞n, Monday, February 13, 2012 10:53 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha

it never clicked with me until now, but looking at that dirty harry pic its clear that harry callahan is the most badass sweater vest-wearer in cinema history

suddenly Santorum makes sense

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Monday, February 13, 2012 10:27 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"And then, in early 2012, after ILX did away with the 'Suggest Ban' feature, user CaptainLorax said, in reference to Nicki Minaj, that he 'figured pop stars wouldn't be so ghetto.' It's widely believed that statement swayed public opinion and eventually led to the 'Suggest Ban' feature being reinstated."

― J0rdan S., Monday, February 13, 2012 2:28 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

holy shit SB went, huh.

Good results so far, voted for Die Hard 3 and Assault on Precinct

― Tuomas, Monday, 13 February 2012 18:54 (46 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh the first one in the series?

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Monday, 13 February 2012 18:55 (46 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

holy shit SB went, huh.

― a hoy hoy, Monday, February 13, 2012 7:34 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah i hadn't even noticed dag

My dad called me this morning and said that "the guy from the Foo Fighters" looked like "the guy from the Chili Peppers" "except with a shirt on."

― jaymc, Monday, February 13, 2012 8:37 PM (13 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Then he hung up.

― jaymc, Monday, February 13, 2012 8:37 PM (13 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

holy shit SB went, huh.

Not really no, its just been renamed.

you may be surprised to find that there was a thread about it

Haha :)

otm this is where facists come together and express themselves openly, and nobody judges them, it's a liberating and accepting environment

― iatee, Monday, February 13, 2012 7:28 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I mean, not that liberating, I guess

― iatee, Monday, February 13, 2012 7:28 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

OH "flag post" is "suggest ban"?? I thought it was something to do with Wire

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4022/4541085120_62da5cf0b9.jpg

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

omggggg

You missed the ILX "Wire covers" set then?

a runnier bunnier Donnie Darko

― Exile in lolville (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, February 7, 2012 4:58 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

BI is just a dude? I assumed it was a band. lol.

Justin Vernon is the dude's name, Bon Iver is a nom de plume or a band depending on how many people are playing

― Θ ̨Θƪ (sic), Monday, February 13, 2012 7:06 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

vernon is just his middle name tho, his full name is: Justin Vernon Bieber

― https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0 (dayo), Monday, February 13, 2012 7:09 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I picture someone running around trying to trap Dave Mustaine and he keeps escaping, like a malevolent hateful hyperreligious Schmoo

― Laura Lucy Lynn (La Lechera), Wednesday, February 15, 2012 2:23 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Wait for it . . .

So that other thread is gonna be "I can't be bothered to read thd book but do I ever have PINIONS about what it all means" which is p much my gender theory nightmare.

This is why I don't discuss gender with men any more. Failed experiment, tears before bedtime.

― White Chocolate Cheesecake, Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:20 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm gonna try and make them read the book and if they don't I'm gonna tie them to a chair and feed them the book one piece at a time. Until I get tired. I get that you've been round this course too many times but I haven't - outside of the sociology of gaming at least - and I'm excited about it, at least for now.

― Also unknown as Zora (Surfing At Work), Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:23 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm not doing this any more. I'm going back to threads about trees and coastline and Cornish grammar and Radiohead records. :-(

― White Chocolate Cheesecake, Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:23 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

idk u got sniffy w me for quoting monique wittig. its like also there is not one single syllabus for doing womens studies. there are feminisms.

― judith, Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:24 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I must've missed it: what book are we talking about?

― jaymc, Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:27 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"The 100 Greatest Action Films of All Time"

― max buzzword (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, February 15, 2012 4:28 PM (40 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You missed the ILX "Wire covers" set then?

Not entirely but apparently I never saw the end product's cover! That'd be me basically never reading ILM though I suppose.

Well, it was posted as a link, so it's quite likely few have seen it.

fwiw this actually seems pretty straightforward but (capricious bolding to follow)

METHODS:
Sixty mature Leghorn* type chickens were chosen and divided into three groups. The 25 chickens in group A were given a weekly dose of 3 mg/kg/week methylprednisolone acetate(1) intramuscularly(2). Four chickens in group B died after the first drug injection and were excluded from the study(3). Therefore, the remaining 21 chickens in group B were additionally given 25 mg/kg/day pentoxifylline(4) intramuscularly(5), along with the steroid medication(6) as given in group A. The ten chickens in group C were not given any injections, as they were accepted as the control group(7). After the sacrifice(8) of the animals at week 14, both femoral heads(9) were taken from each animal. The animals which died along the course of the study also underwent pathological examination(10) but were not a part of the statistical analysis.
RESULTS:
In this study, steroid induced femoral head osteonecrosis(11) has been experimentally observed in chickens after high doses of corticosteroid therapy(12). The chickens were given pentoxifylline in order to prevent the effects of steroid on bones and bone marrow. The results showed that chickens are suitable osteonecrosis models(13), and that steroid causes adipogenesis(14) and necrosis(15) in the bone marrow and the death of the subchondral bone(16).

* lol
1) what the hell is this and why didn't you say what it is and not what it's named
2) this should seem obvious, "intra," "muscularly," but it's still not layperson
3) "excluded from the study" is a meaningful statistical concept, that MIGHT have implications, but this isn't clarified
4) ok waht is it
5) there's that word again
6) so the first one is a steroid medication?
7) is this like being popular
8) my god
9) this is a kind of fish, right
10) staring contest
11) wait is this what you're suggesting is happened? is everything that you described above...this?
12) didn't realize that was especially high
13) osteonecrosis is not for sale!!!!
14) chill wave
15) death metal
16) decemberists album

― i love pinfold cricket (gbx), Thursday, February 16, 2012 2:15 AM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha beat me

Anyway technically speaking what TurnItIn probably does when you upload your paper is check a bunch of n-grams (chunks of words a few sentences long) and checks its index for matches. When it finds matches on an improbably long chunk of words, it flags it as plagiarism.
Basically it types in random phrases to google but advanced and automatic.
― tinker tailor soldier sb (silby), Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:02 AM (1 hour ago)

imna reverse engineer it and sell a product that can write papers for people
― iatee, Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:05 AM (1 hour ago)

im gonna sell people chunks of words
― lag∞n, Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:06 AM (1 hour ago)

i will sell them dream words and nightmare paragraphs from a red factory in a dead town
― (_()_) (Lamp), Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:17 AM (57 minutes ago)

that does sound like a pretty good business model
― lag∞n, Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:23 AM (52 minutes ago)

at the very least it's better than the groupon business model
― iatee, Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:24 AM (50 minutes ago)

that's the premise for my romance writer's phrase book, and it was published in 1984!

(not the phrasebook i wrote, the phrasebook i HAVE)
it was written by kent and shelton
it is a campy masterpiece of weirdness

Amazon link plz?

gbx's footnotes are amazing. I have lolled.

XP LINK TO THE THREAD GODAMNIT

imna reverse engineer it and sell a product that can write papers for people
― iatee, Thursday, February 16, 2012 5:05 AM (1 hour ago)

This basically exists for lazy and stupid SEO people: http://www.kunocreative.com/blog/bid/71420/What-Black-Hat-Content-Marketing-for-SEO-Looks-Like

It takes existing content, reads and parses it, then spits back out a rewritten version substituting synonyms and similar phrases. If you click through and look at the "rewritten" version compared to the original, it's like "Engrish" to the nth degree.

holy shit SB went, huh.

Not really no, its just been renamed.

you may be surprised to find that there was a thread about it

I'm surprised; who the fuck would read that thread?

tho glad I mostly kept off the Whitney threads now.

i will always sb you

http://www.amazon.com/Romance-Writers-Phrase-Book-Perigee/dp/0399510028

added to wish list

not to be all self promotey (because there's nothing to promote) but
Invent interesting metaphors and similies for women's romantic novels.

r.i.p. the phrase "ban cruising"

can we use "flag waving" now?

Do we have confirmation on that Onion attribution? Seems too racist for them.

― Three Word Username, Friday, February 17, 2012 7:12 AM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's from the onion

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Friday, February 17, 2012 7:23 AM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

When?

― Three Word Username, Friday, February 17, 2012 7:29 AM (40 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

from the onions new spinoff, racist onion

― max, Friday, February 17, 2012 7:30 AM (8 seconds ago)

lol in part because, why would the Onion be incapable of racism

Didn't say incapable, it just doesn't seem their style. Would be surprised but not incredulous if it turned out to be from there.

well, google up onion popular baby names and get surprised, then!

racist onion

why you make me cry racist onion...

btw have you guys heard that Pitbull single "International Love" where the only places Chris Brown mentions in the chorus are New York City, Los Angeles and Miami, and he sings them like they rhyme with each other? stay in school kids.

― CANDY aka JUNK (some dude), Friday, February 17, 2012 10:08 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if u want to read other racist things on the internet, 8t07mf70nt is full of it

― Mordy, Saturday, February 18, 2012 7:42 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

does that say pitchfork

― bnw, Saturday, February 18, 2012 7:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ha I meant to post that one earlier.

Edited for brevity. Good long laugh, though.

god. i was dating * briefly * a girl in the fall who was trying to tell me what a great book Fountainhead is.

― Porto for Pyros (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Friday, February 17, 2012 12:37 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

She was into the freaky butt stuff, wasn't she

― Spleen of Hearts (kingfish), Saturday, February 18, 2012 6:01 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if mlk were alive today he would def have a laser pointer and a headset and the freakeconomics guys would help him figure out new smartphone apps w/ which we can defeat racism

― iatee, Monday, 20 February 2012 16:34 (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

mlkvalley

"I Am The Resurrection And The Life. No Man Comes To the Father Except By Me. Why Isn't There A White History Month? Mom, update my blog, tell them I'm sick"

― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 2:13 AM (9 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

...perhaps that needed its context to be funny, not sure (racist crazylady on is this racist thread)

that last sentence just slays me

there was one teenager in america who knew who the libertines was, I met him once

― iatee, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 2:26 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha that's the second time I've been excelsiored this week w/ a typo in my post :(

the libertines might as well just be one person for all I know

in high school, my best friend, whose pedantry remains unparalleled, would have told you that "who the Libertines was" is correct & would happily have explained to you why

yeah I guess it's up in the air but it does sound bad

if u want to read other racist things on the internet, 8t07mf70nt is full of it

― Mordy, Saturday, February 18, 2012 7:42 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

does that say pitchfork

― bnw, Saturday, February 18, 2012 7:43 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

echo..

The cast agreed to do the co-ed shower scene only if Verhoeven agreed to direct the scene naked, which he did.[2]

respect

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 12:25 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Hahahaha "Don't throw me in the briar patch!"

― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 12:26 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

beautiful

my bad

and i could vote for that awesome vampire movie that is in alaska in the dark in the snow. loved that one.

me too! think it's called 30 days in alaska or something

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:27 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

30 Days of Night

― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:27 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nah that's not it

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:28 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

30 dark days?

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:28 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The Wicker Man: the game

― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 5:27 PM (25 minutes ago) Bookmark

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 5:50 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that one made my roommate come out and say "clearly something out here is funny"

a+ goole

dying. DYING.

Terminator 2's "I am keeler robot who awnly shewts to vound" makes it the ideal Obamafan action crapper.

― Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 10:08 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

there it is

― ⚓ (gr8080), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 10:10 PM (56 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ash wednesday in 2 hours. i've got it marked on my calendar

that's morbius in a pithy, incomprehensible nutshell

xpost

will send u 5000 words 'splainin that, am

lol, no you won't

i wouldn't read it anyhow

he's like a fortune cookie factory staffed entirely by uptight, reactionary lefties

yeah, The Nation sucks. got a gift subscription once.

i grew up reading the nation but when i try it now it mostly feels very self-righteous and smug. there's usually one or two good articles per issue though.

Okay ams. Go ahead. Poll it again. Poll it again. You're the ace film man, poll it again. It's a simple list, just poll it again. Poll what you say! Poll it again! Poll it again!! Two polls, ballots come through here, polls cancel other out. Oh my? Where'd you learn that?

― omar little, Wednesday, February 22, 2012 7:38 PM (15 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so peter weller is a doctoral candidate in renaissance art at ucla now apparently. someone i was talking to went to a lecture there on the homoerotics of michelangelo without looking at the name of who was speaking and was kind of surprised to walk in and the guy who is speaking is robocop

― desperado, rough rider (thomp), Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:33 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

we've all been there

hahaha

"Thank you for your co-operation dissertation."

why am I not remembering the Female Nudity in Die Hard.

― beachville, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 8:59 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

near the beginning a couple of randy officemates are going at it and the girl's shirt is off, then the terrorists come in and drag them out

― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

fuckin' terrorists

― valleys of your mind (mh), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Caught Having Sex

― max, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It is amazing how in the '80s they were able to sneak bare breasts into everything.

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:42 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

melaniegriffithvacuuming.gif

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:42 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

jamieleecurtischanginghershirt.gif

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

We had to take porn where we could get it

― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it certainly made Oliver & Company more interesting

― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:44 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oliverlickinghisballs.gif

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, February 21, 2012 3:48 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^^ irl lols @ this

> there is a burned doll

how'd it get burned

This = brilliant

Who are they? The URL doesn't help.

― Tuomas, Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:19 AM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Alicia Keys (shame on you, Tuomas) + Gerry Adams (xp)

― Charles Kennedy Jumped Up, He Called 'Oh No'. (Tom D.), Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:21 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The pic was taken from the front, that's why I didn't recognize her.

― Tuomas, Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:23 AM (21 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

L&G, Tuomas in two.

A+

should i write an email to deli express asking if they are using free range mechanically separated chickens y/n

― Thu'um gang (jjjusten), Thursday, February 23, 2012 11:57 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

can't tell if Tuomas is in humor mode or Tuomas mode

― valleys of your mind (mh), Thursday, 23 February 2012 14:12 (2 hours ago) Permalink

THAT'S THE MAGIC

― markers, Thursday, 23 February 2012 14:18 (2 hours ago) Permalink

:D

Schrodinger's Tuomas

Okay, thanks for explanation. I didn't know she was imprisoned, what did she do?

― Tuomas, Thursday, 23 February 2012 15:20 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lindsay_Lohan#2006.E2.80.9307:_Independent_movies_and_career_interruptions

tl;dr version: alcohol, drugs, everything you can do that is illegal to do while on alcohol and drugs

― valleys of your mind (mh), Thursday, 23 February 2012 15:24 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Not dogsitting, I hope?

― Tuomas, Thursday, 23 February 2012 15:33 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah, The Nation sucks.

high5! centrist jellyfish

jellyfish wd be more like high 10 surely?

And then you pee on each other's hands.

now were getting somewhere

irl lol

2 party system evolved from jellyfish?

In re: Kreayshawn:

--

she can't even get on gerardo's level yet, dude warranted a weird al parody

― some dude, Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:16 AM (18 minutes ago)

actually weird al might do a good job with Gucci Gucci, maybe something about Charlie Brown like "Snoopy Snoopy" or something....

― dave coolier (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:23 AM (11 minutes ago)

snoopy snoopy lucy lucy patty patty schroeder

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Thursday, February 23, 2012 10:29 AM

:D

omar are you gonna do this romcom poll or

― ⚓ (gr8080)

i'll hand the romcom poll off to morbs

― omar little, Thursday, February 23, 2012 1:10 PM (57 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

morbs, if you need advice on how to run it letz cyber chat about it

― omar little, Thursday, February 23, 2012 1:11 PM (35 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://www.instructables.com/files/deriv/F37/5XF2/F1U8ZZ5X/F375XF2F1U8ZZ5X.MEDIUM.jpg

If the KKK is behind Mixed Martial Arts, than I just don't know what to think.

― pplains, Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:06 (42 minutes ago) Permalink

It would make sense but not really.

― pplains, Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:06 (42 minutes ago) Permalink

the KKK are against martial arts-mixing iirc

― Big Mr. Guess U.S.A. Champion (crüt), Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:08 (40 minutes ago) Permalink

ok thats amazing

what thread is that from?

is this racist

thats stellar

just think, one crossed wire and Romneybot could have yanked Santorum's arm clean off

― robbery by sudden snatching (DJP), Thursday, February 23, 2012 8:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Amputation by sudden snatching.

― clemenza, Thursday, February 23, 2012 8:40 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sans-torn-arm

― joygoat, Thursday, February 23, 2012 9:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i haven't seen the transformers movies in the theaters but anecdotally what's the gender breakdown in the audience that you guys have seen?

― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 19:15 (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

65% men, 35% bored

― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 19:17 (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

this thread is on fyah!

(from the action movie poll thread)

love how this thread has petered out into lengthy discussions of Gina Gershon and Cornel West

― DNRIYHM NATION 1814 (some dude), Friday, February 24, 2012 9:38 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Petered out? You mean RAMPED UP!!!

― Josh in Chicago, Friday, February 24, 2012 9:39 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

*gina gershon jumps out window, cornel west explodes*

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Friday, February 24, 2012 10:19 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

irl lol

top notch

what is ghettohikes oh wait google oh no slowly ghettobackingaway

― Unleash the Chang (he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Friday, February 24, 2012 11:04 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ftr, i'm personally very concerned about being put on any race xls lists. my peeps have had bad experience with that.

― Mordy, Friday, February 24, 2012 8:22 AM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Mordy, I will put you down as "Navajo"

― robbery by sudden snatching (DJP), Friday, February 24, 2012 8:22 AM (23 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

man greeks are so fn touchy about everything, like just go to hell for one second and eat some shit, there there, much better, up yours

― ploppawheelie V (k3vin k.), Friday, February 24, 2012 3:45 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if only we all had sig others who were fine with having open relationships aka fucking our ex girlfriend rihanna

― J0rdan S., Friday, February 24, 2012 1:35 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

my wife never lets me even hang out with rihanna just to catch up on old times :(

― DNRIYHM NATION 1814 (some dude), Friday, February 24, 2012 1:37 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

we could make soccer players wear helmets, also make the soccerball into an olive shape, also let soccer players pick up the ball and throw it

― flagp∞st (dayo), Thursday, 23 February 2012 18:39 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i like women

― max, Wednesday, August 12, 2009 10:36 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― max, Friday, February 24, 2012 8:35 PM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

even THATCHER?

― unban dictionary (blueski), Wednesday, August 12, 2009 10:42 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

id cripple her economy

― max, Wednesday, August 12, 2009 10:43 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― horseshoe, Friday, February 24, 2012 8:36 PM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

from the "speak truth to power" thread:

i once broke a tooth in the shower

― brownie, Friday, February 24, 2012 4:37 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

that one was estela catnip

it was, i even reported it to my ilx report discouraging spouse.

show me on the message board where he ignores you

Baseball, no more wooden bats. The best technology only.

― Jeff, Thursday, 23 February 2012 21:39 (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

vampire bats

― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 23 February 2012 21:40 (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Brick ba-a-a-a-ts!

If the KKK is behind Mixed Martial Arts, than I just don't know what to think.

― pplains, Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:06 (42 minutes ago) Permalink

It would make sense but not really.

― pplains, Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:06 (42 minutes ago) Permalink

the KKK are against martial arts-mixing iirc

― Big Mr. Guess U.S.A. Champion (crüt), Thursday, 23 February 2012 20:08 (40 minutes ago) Permalink

LOLling "Is this EXCELSIOR?" thread imo.

man this fucking show. i enjoyed quite a bit even though yeah, over-reliance on cliffhangers and twists. but that last episode was just a huge shitshow. that entire scene with brody not exploding that bomb was just painfully terrible: first false alarm, smth's broken in my supercool exploding vest. imma repair it. and just when i'm about to do it for realz, secret service tells me my daughter's on the phone and it's an emergency. you know what else is an emergency fuckheads, an assassination attempt. i almost switched it off then but i thought i'd already watched 12 hours of this so the remaining 30 minutes couldn't be that bad. and yet. it ends with that fucking shock therapy and claire danes connecting the last dots bcz she remembers her good times with brody. fucking hell that was lame as shit.

also, there's one thng that's been bothering me during the entire series. why the fuck does everyone call brody by his last name, including his wife?

― Jibe, Sunday, February 26, 2012 3:35 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's his name, don't were it out

― kinder, Sunday, February 26, 2012 3:42 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

brother cornel is cool as hell and has had a lot of cool shit to say in his career. ― RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass)

^^ ntm

he's a professionally useless blowhard ― flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist)

^^ ntm

I've seen Cornel from both sides now, as sage and crank, but still somehow, it's West's self-importance I recall. I really can't see West at all.

― Aimless, Sunday, February 26, 2012 1:39 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

why is every fincher film shot in the same disgusting yellow-green haze

― seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Sunday, February 26, 2012 10:27 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

mamma mia

― RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Sunday, February 26, 2012 10:27 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

just liked that juxtaposition

From the thoroughly gross 'pet poops' thread:

--

i only feed my dog the finest organic kibble and thus he poops neat little tootsie rolls, no need to wipe

the turtle is much worse, i get projectile shitted-on every time we do shell maintenance

― the late great, Monday, February 27, 2012 9:47 AM (3 hours ago)

snake too, one time he wrapped himself around my wrist and used his strength to whip himself around while shitting, thus slingshot-launching his poop into my face.

― the late great, Monday, February 27, 2012 9:48 AM (3 hours ago)

okay, that right there is a set of images

wtf i come here for the jokes

Whiney I saw you on TV yesterday. that was weird.

― Artful Dodderer (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, February 27, 2012 10:00 AM (4 hours ago)

was he on America's Funniest Flubs, Blunders, And Boners? i love that show.

― scott seward, Monday, February 27, 2012 10:01 AM (4 hours ago)

Funniest Boners?

http://www.redshirt.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/batman6.jpg

"I appreciate the opportunity to be here and to discuss obviously the number one issue in this campaign and the number one issue here in the state of Michigan, which is the health and state of our economy and what we can do in Washington, D.C., I would put it, to create an atmosphere for our economy to grow, the private sector to grow.

Here in Michigan, you've been through a lot of tough times. I knew she was a snitch so I cut off her tongue. Got happy with the trigger, now I'm on the run. An assassin! We all know that, and it's exciting to see the resurgence of the auto industry here. But over the last four years, Michigan's lost over 140,000 jobs; 250,000 people from Michigan have left the workforce and the unemployment rate is, unfortunately, still higher than the national average. So if you were to ask the question 'Are you better off now than you were four years ago?', for too many people in this state, the answer would still be, 'Wicked clown, wicked clown, wicked clown, wicked clown.' Don't fuck with me.

I'm going to lay out very quickly my economic plan. And you're going to hear this and you're going to say, 'Well, that's pretty similar to other economic plans' that you've heard from Republicans. Let me do that first, and then let me tell you how we're just a little different from some of the others in this race and how we approach the issue of creating an opportunity where everyone in America can rise.

My father was a priest, cold blooded, he's dead. Hypocrite, he was a bigot, so I cut off his head. Poured on the holy water, 'Bless the dead' is what I said. And heard the demons screaming as his body bled. I also believe in reducing the size of government. That's key. You can't just cut taxes and reduce as a result ... revenues to the federal government without creating a balance by reducing the size of government. And that's important, too -- to remove the regulatory burden from the people of this country.

Now I know you folks here in Michigan have been hearing some things on the television from one of my opponents that I am a big spender. You will find that fairly surprising to the folks who are my colleagues and any objective look at my spending record when I was in Congress, and there was one done just yesterday by the Weekly Standard. Went into my trailer, I filled up the glass. Before she took a sip I had my dick in her ass.
I banged it, and banged it, the shit was absurd! Like she was Sporty Spice, and I was some fuckin' nerd. Wicked clown, wicked clown, wicked clown, wicked clown.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a hostile world, and we need to make sure that we are relying upon ourselves and that means we need to create a marketplace where we can compete with everybody around the world. No advantages, just a level playing field. Wicked clown, wicked clown. Wicked clown, wicked clown. Don't fuck with me."
--Rick Santorum, speech to the Detroit Economic Club, 2/18/12

― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 11:13 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it would be funnier if i wasn't so concerned about how long underratedaerosmith spent putting it together

that is truly a thing of beauty

just on paper, it's great, but i need to hear it performed tbh

this...I love it.

aerosmith = hero

looooool, I love it

Sheryl Crow will really get to show off her coloratura in that

― robbery by sudden snatching (DJP), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 8:35 AM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

had to look it up.

when that poster uses words unknown to me, i have to figure it's either an operatic term or some mysterious part of the female anatomy.

I thought it was something to do with reptiles, lol

oh man, you all haven't seen the video of Sheryl Crow singing a Mozart duet with Pavarotti, have you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P627lL09hwg

this is a soprano/baritone duet being sung by a pop singer and a tenor, fyi

LOL

"sheryl crow" and "coloratura" are two words that have a like a totally opposed magnetic resonance

I had no idea Sheryl Crow was so annoying.

huh. i learned something today.

xpost

She has a pretty weak voice, but she does a better job with it than I would have guessed.

she's from Columbia, MO!!

pretty good, sheryl

I know, right? I was very surprised!

like really!

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7203/6933170213_eaf360cc29_z.jpg

Can someone explain this to me?

― Laura Lucy Lynn (La Lechera), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 1:24 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I believe that's the shirt you get for your baby boy when he bangs a bunch of chicks and writes a book about it?

― tylerw, Tuesday, February 28, 2012 1:29 PM (2 hours ago)

"I wanted to be a part of that process," he says. "Somehow, that manifested in pig slaughter."

the number of times ive said this to myself

― lag∞n, Monday, February 6, 2012 3:23 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shows what happens when my US history class runs out of time somewhere between the start of the vietnam war and the year I was born

― Nicholas Pokémon (silby), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 2:42 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"America left Vietnam, snorted coke at Studio 54, Reagan!"

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 2:42 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Male Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Nutsack (Abbbottt), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 10:44 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

omg abbs

Dina Lohan ‏ @dinalohan
The Lohan woman LOVE Terry Richardson !! Thank you for gracing us with your kindness xo

https://twitter.com/#!/dinalohan/status/173492148556140544

― max, Tuesday, February 28, 2012 3:48 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

who calls a penis "kindness"

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 3:50 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

barbara cartland

"Oo, woo-oo woo
oo-oo woo
oo-oo woo oo oo"

http://www.rockofages.uk.com/stock/1034.jpg

public school is kinda horrible imho, if i had the money and the children id send them to private for sure

― lag∞n, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 3:23 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

what would their names be

― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 3:25 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

pikachu and voteronpaul

― lag∞n, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 3:26 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shakey's posts remind me of why browsing the comedy section of any video store is such a dispiriting experience.

― rob, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 3:41 PM (37 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shakey stands around your video store disparaging your choices?

― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 3:42 PM (12 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://earbuds.popdose.com/bob/TROLL2.jpg

^me after exiting Blockbuster

i choose you voteronpaul

dying over here

I wonder if there was a Dr. Morbius equivalent in 1940 berating people for liking Bob Hope instead of . . . I don't know, John Bunny.

― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 5:59 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'm sure he was

― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 5:02 PM (38 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ha

I hope they spend 20 minutes with a Nick Fury origin story, so we can find out how he got his eyepatch.

― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 5:44 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

mail order iirc

― inspector george gentlyfallingblood (c sharp major), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 5:53 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

special delivery of lol

forgive me whiney for i am

https://w1.buysub.com/pubs/SM/SPM/6for6issues.jsp?cds_page_id=114163&cds_mag_code=SPM&id=1330573204198&lsid=20602138412022983&vid=2&cds_response_key=I1201NL

linking to a $6 subscription.

might or might not work, considering i just jumped on it.

― NO NUTRITIONAL CONTENT (kelpolaris), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 10:41 PM (58 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

6

― iatee, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 10:50 PM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

6 dollar

― iatee, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 10:50 PM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

6 dollar spin subscription

― iatee, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 10:50 PM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark

not what i thought "buysub.com" was for

but aren't they only $5?

I think there is a span between not being best friends forever and not being able to play together within a studio at the same time and place though.

Then again, it's Blink 182 and not Weather Report, so it's not like they are going to bust into some part that will expand based on the player's interaction or something. So much of that modern rock is just as microprocessed to the nth click and or copied and pasted, it's not like there is any real interaction between the musicians anyway. Not that doing it that way necessarily makes it bad music, but the spontaneous part of the equation is nigh on gone.

― earlnash, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 6:38 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Then again, what would Weather Report have sounded like if they had all lived in the same house?

― Mark G, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 6:42 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

pretty much like Enema of the State

― tylerw, Wednesday, February 29, 2012 6:44 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"Time to take the 'Kill Romney' strategy to the next level." Time to...actually kill him.

― clemenza, Thursday, 1 March 2012 07:32 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

(Note to Homeland Security: this is a message board where we regularly joke around, especially with regards to Mitt Romney. The above post is not intended as advocacy.)

― clemenza, Thursday, 1 March 2012 07:57 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

allah salam alaikum plan is go

― lag∞n, Thursday, 1 March 2012 08:59 (36 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so perfect

legume shoots and scores

beautiful

I loved it!

just called feds on icey

How did I know you have them on speed dial.

i would say "snitches and talkers get stitches and walkers" but he's gotta be at least halfway there already

meet me halfway anytime

http://splitsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/thegraduate.jpg

if i had a twitter i'd say "Andrew Breitbart, PBUH"

― goole, Thursday, March 1, 2012 2:30 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

okay two things i've never heard of today.

― scott seward, Thursday, March 1, 2012 2:32 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Punk Bitch U Hated?

― scott seward, Thursday, March 1, 2012 2:33 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

when Dan Savage dies, how many Democrats will reveal that they've been carrying around bags of Santorum in their pockets every day as a tribute

― be scientific, douchebag (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, March 1, 2012 1:56 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

no, my son is also named beetbort

― flagp∞st (dayo), Thursday, March 1, 2012 2:59 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dont try to decontextualize my amazing argument bro

― lag∞n, Thursday, March 1, 2012 7:32 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^a thing that could be awesome to say on cocaine

― lag∞n, Thursday, March 1, 2012 7:32 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

as someone who taught hs, the idea of wanting to embark on a romantic relationship with a hs student seems totally insane to me.

― Mordy, Thursday, March 1, 2012 4:08 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

exactly

― be scientific, douchebag (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, March 1, 2012 4:09 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

agreed, love em and leave em

― lag∞n, Thursday, March 1, 2012 4:11 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

irl lol

legume on a roll

re the movie "hobo with a shotgun":

it's great film, even better than citizen kane

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Thursday, March 1, 2012 4:16 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

not quite as good as citizen kane with a shotgun though

― I GUESS THAT CINNABON GETTIN EATEN (Edward III), Thursday, March 1, 2012 4:17 PM (15 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

watching Solid Gold with my father was an odd experience because he would shout "WOO! SHAKE IT!" at the Solid Gold Dancers and I would always think to myself "they can't hear you"

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Thursday, March 1, 2012

i take what you're saying to a point, pf, but wd argue that the fact that wealthy people can also be the victim of racism doesn't mean that there's a hierarchy in which inequalities of wealth somehow trump inequalities of race (or gender or sexuality or etc). the inequalities form a complex web, and whilst not much is served by us at a distance arguing about the finer points of whether somebody's behaviour is racist or not, what we're really discussing is much closer to home and all of our lives - the society we live in and that we want to construct, i guess.

btw John Terry is a cunt

― Mo Money Mo Johnston (Noodle Vague), Friday, 2 March 2012 13:15 (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh yeah meant to say

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Friday, 2 March 2012 13:17 (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

he is.

― the pinefox, Friday, 2 March 2012 13:17 (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I was pumping gas last night and a guy at an adjacent pump asked me "so who ya voting for? newt?" I was kind of dumbstruck as to why anyone would ask a complete stranger who they're voting for in the GOP primaries.

― Big Mr. Guess U.S.A. Champion (crüt), Friday, 2 March 2012 15:11 (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this guy might have been Newt in a wig fwiw

― Big Mr. Guess U.S.A. Champion (crüt), Friday, 2 March 2012 15:12 (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ha

i love Looney Toons to death but i think i'd feel weird about figuring out where they fit on my ballot and leave them out -- still on the fence on whether i'll even include any animated features

― some dude, Friday, March 2, 2012 8:40 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^ hero imo

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Friday, March 2, 2012 8:40 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i don't like to use the word hero lightly, but yes, i guess i am a hero

― some dude, Friday, March 2, 2012 8:42 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

the context of the handful of posts before/after those is what makes it imo

That's almost a Jack Handey quote.

I'm happily married, in love with my wife, secure in growing older, but if my wife said "Oh, by the way Honey, I'm inviting the cheerleading squad over to our house for a sleepover this weekend," my reply would likely be something along the lines of "That sounds great. If you need anything, I'll be in Tunica County, Mississippi."

― pplains, Friday, March 2, 2012 5:24 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

little do you know... this weekend, tunica county is hosting the largest cheerleading convention in the country

― max, Friday, March 2, 2012 5:26 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you should get an extra vote and a free car if you have killed someone with your virginity

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Friday, March 2, 2012 2:42 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol, read that as "tote" and prefer it that way

i think reaching out to a white audience is a good change for spin

― the wild eyed boy from soundcloud (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, March 2, 2012 2:58 PM (25 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the reason "tumblr whites" is classic is because it's such a horribly clueless continuation of the Why do white people criticize one another for being white? bullshit people as smart as whiney should've gotten over a no;;opm uears agp

― some dude, Friday, March 2, 2012 4:42 PM (54 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"a no;;opm uears agp" is the way they say "a million years ago" in the future btw

― some dude, Friday, March 2, 2012 4:42 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

woah, Esperanto

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Friday, March 2, 2012 4:42 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

pinterest esperanto

― lag∞n, Friday, March 2, 2012 4:45 PM (50 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

have you guys seen the sequel

― lag∞n, Sunday, 4 March 2012 05:24 (15 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

blade runner 2 electric sheepaloo?

― Philip Nunez, Sunday, 4 March 2012 05:25 (15 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

people are still doing that joke eh?

doin that joke 2: electric fuckutoo

its funny tho because electric sheepaloo actually refers to something

a superior example of the form no doubt

the way this developed is p. amazing, number none the utd fan going from 'performance of champions' to...

cuuuunts

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 16:56 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

not unlucky there. Just a bit of crap defending.

― EZ Snappin, Sunday, 4 March 2012 16:57 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

United finally have the goal their first half dominance merited

― Striking Minors (Nasty, Brutish & Short), Sunday, 4 March 2012 16:58 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That was so so predictable after 45 minutes of largely unthreatening dominance. United will come back several times stronger in the second half.

― Homosexual Satan Wasp (Matt DC), Sunday, 4 March 2012 16:59 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cuuuuuuunts

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:01 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

not sure I can face watching the inevitable crushing despair that will be the second half

― Sylv_ebanks (DJ Mencap), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:01 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

not sure I can face watching the inevitable crushing despair that will be the second half rest of the season

― Ismael Klata, Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:02 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well yeah if we're in fourth by the end of this month I'll be overjoyed

― Sylv_ebanks (DJ Mencap), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:04 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

performance of champions

― Number None, Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:04 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cunts fuckn cunts fuck them fuck those other cunts fuckin cuuunts

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:04 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

refs a cunt friedel's fuckin made a cunt of it, walker's not cunting done it and cunt it any cunt but that cunt

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:06 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Rafael needs to come on though cos Jones is looking good for a red. It's come to something when i'm recommending Rafael as a safe option

― Number None, Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:06 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you're utd nobody's gonna send ye off cos everyone's a cunt

― Streep? That's where I'm a-striking! (darraghmac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:07 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Just looked at United's run-in. With the exception of City away on April 30th, it's piss easy. If they win this one and are still within a couple of points of City by next month that fixture's going to be absolutely massive.

Cunts obv.

― Homosexual Satan Wasp (Matt DC), Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:09 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

obv

― Ismael Klata, Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:11 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

performance of cunts

― Number None, Sunday, 4 March 2012 17:13 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

u guys sure like the c-word a lot, huh

the irish man, the irish.

*cough cough*

Footcelsior

*cough cough*

Yeah apart from lolworthy excess of the cnutword I didnt understand a bar of that one.

I just assume if I see the word cunt in excelsior, the subject is incomprehensible foreign sports.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVYW2cTOSYw

^^about rubgy probably, not even clicking

lol

Well it possibly involves ball-crushing

*cough cough*

Footcelsior

*cough cough*

There's plenty of stuff that gets posted to Excelsior threads that's incomprehensible to non-Americans, so I don't see why the Brits can't post their incomprehensible stuff too?

hey there's plenty of stuff that gets posted to Excelsior that's comprehensible but not funny too.

you know what's really great? when we all argue for ages about whether something's excelsiorable or not. nothing makes me laugh harder or longer.

i am happy to see Tuomas defending the posting of things that are incomprehensible

think of it as a production meeting for the forthcoming Cafepress book xp

if a few people had stamped on the unfunny sooner, that book cd've been a bestseller

Not sure what is up with you people and this "iPad laptop" thing.

― valleys of your mind (mh), Sunday, 4 March 2012 21:52 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

btw they already made that and it's called an iPad. You just have to buy one of the many cases that has an attached keyboard or the keyboard dock

― valleys of your mind (mh), Sunday, 4 March 2012 21:53 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm sure I told you guys that adding a wireless keyboard to an iPad is packed with win xp

― Wub wub wub wubwubwubwub wub Pzzzzzzz WUBB wubwub (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 4 March 2012 21:54 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you'd think they'd pack in windows 8

― Nhex, Monday, 5 March 2012 03:45 (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nice.

nhex bringing next level

haha

arseen wengah 'aving a go
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/17261746

rong fred innit me china

Looney Runes

^ some good outtakes on this Zep boot.

― Tarfumes The Escape Goat, Monday, March 5, 2012 12:39 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahah

I only know the one song by Al Green.

― beachville, Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:10 AM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

harsh

― Humperdin C.K. (seandalai), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:18 AM (45 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that song is a cover of Taco's "Puttin' on the Ritz"

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:18 AM (45 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^ahahahaha

is this old? i can't believe this is real. sorry, don't usually post facebook lolz on here

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/422627_384373131573016_117982368212095_1543899_321217585_n.jpg

but it did make me laugh...

photoshopped, but excellent nonetheless.

oh it is! okay, yeah, it seemed too good to be true.

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/490196/thumbs/s-MITT-ROMNEY-RMONEY-large640.jpg

i do like the idea of calling him r-money though

r-money grip

where my dogs at

on the roof

ahaha

I guess the other campaign is raising O-SCRIP, a billion's worth

He's pretty cool, but I support him more for his dreamy qualities

Dude should just embrace who he is: R-Money

r-money of the spheres

I guess the other campaign is raising O-SCRIP, a billion's worth

― Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 2:44 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's really sad when dude gets to 'riffing' while still grimly on-message

wrong thread

from the "found porn in the woods thread":

I remember finding one where rain/exposure had shifted the dyes such that everyone had turned green. Just Hulks and She-Hulks all over the place.

― bentelec, Tuesday, March 6, 2012 11:02 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

would smash hulk

― c'est ne pas un car wash (snoball), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 11:07 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Don't make me horny. You wouldn't like me when I'm horny.

i think i hulk would smash as a SN at one point.

see also:
- ihop
- that stripey gum with the horses

― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Wednesday, March 7, 2012 12:06 AM (11 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol i just realized thats probably a zebra

― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Wednesday, March 7, 2012 12:06 AM (2 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

But sort of back on topic, one of my colleagues (who is black) told me last week that her son's school requires him to keep his hair at least two inches long???!!! Like, there's a school rule about it. And of course her son HATES this with a burning white-hot hate because hair that long is..... not exactly in among the London yoot

― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 8:54 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

omg, is that an anti-skinhead rule?

lololololololololol

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 8:55 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

...

id guess its a prep school pleb-phobe thing?

― The term “hipster racism” from Carmen Van Kerckhove at Racialicious (nakhchivan), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:14 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

or can state schools make inane rules too idk

― The term “hipster racism” from Carmen Van Kerckhove at Racialicious (nakhchivan), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:16 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

He doesn't go to prep school, so it's not that

― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:16 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if yr childs hair is less than 2" long then it means u are currently glassing a suspected nonce in an estate pub

― The term “hipster racism” from Carmen Van Kerckhove at Racialicious (nakhchivan), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 9:20 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

state schools live to make inane rules dude

oh god I mean yeah, cmon.

http://mymdna.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/dna_strand_sm.gif

― Eric H., Tuesday, March 6, 2012 6:37 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

...

I don't even want to know what's happening back there

― Vaseline MEN AMAZING JOURNEY (DJP), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 6:55 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It's like opening the Necromonicon.

― Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Tuesday, March 6, 2012 6:57 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if yr childs hair is less than 2" long then it means u are currently glassing a suspected nonce in an estate pub

I can't begin to decipher this. Glassing a nonce? Estate pub?

"glassing" = to hit somebody in the face with a beer glass, often broken
"nonce" = a suspected paedophile, or possibly somebody with a secondary education
"estate pub" = rough-house bar found in the midst of the UK's project housing

should've known that translating all the words wouldn't explain anything. why does having a kid with longer hair mean that you're 'glassing' a 'nonce' in an 'estate pub?'

I thought it was a skinhead joke

very short hair being a signifier of proletarian/underclass upbringing

The Tyranny of (British) Humour

Wow! Very different from what I imagined, which was doing something (glassing?) with or to a dandy in private or fancy pub.

"estate" = council estate = what you guys call projects

but yeah confusingly "estate" also connotes some rich dudes country house and 10,000 acres

no britisher outside of a 19th century novel really thinks of "estate" in the latter sense tho

why does having a kid with longer hair mean that you're 'glassing' a 'nonce' in an 'estate pub?'

Shorter.

why does having a kid w

fwiw i thought that whole thing was pretty funny

what nakh was hilariously suggesting was that if your child has hair less the 2"s long (as banned by tracer's friend's school) the suggestion is that said child is likely to be found in a low-class drinking establishment pulverising someone who has the temerity to be a child-molester/university graduate/softlad (delete as appropriate). that's the explanation though i doubt that'll make it funnier for you. it made me laff a tonne though, QED.

xp max gets it

what nakh was hilariously suggesting was that if your child has hair less the 2"s long (as banned by tracer's friend's school) the suggestion is that said child is likely to be found in a low-class drinking establishment

Not the child, you.

it's actually the parent that's doing the glassing to be completely accurate and remove the last trace of humour from the post

what Tuomas said

yo guys, this has been enlightening. do ilx american posters ever/often post sentences/jokes that are incomprehensible to britishers, or is this strictly a phenomenon going in the other direction?

not quite the same but
http://www.youtube.com/embed/eVFavnzXK9Q

http://www.youtube.com/eVFavnzXK9Q

what nakh was hilariously suggesting was that if your child has hair less the 2"s long (as banned by tracer's friend's school) the suggestion is that said child is likely to be found in a low-class drinking establishment

Not the child, you.

wtf that's not funny

And the circle is complete

yo guys, this has been enlightening. do ilx american posters ever/often post sentences/jokes that are incomprehensible to britishers, or is this strictly a phenomenon going in the other direction?

I wondered that too.

In the USA, "estate" only connotes money and aristocracy. Though I did know what "council estate" meant (sound exactly the opposite of what it means IMO).

Also didn't realize short hair = rude boy (did I use that right?) or chav or wote'er.

Pretty much assume anything referencing housing or schooling in the UK is probably the opposite of what it sounds like, except for the times when it's exactly as you assume.

otoh "project" in the uk just means .. i dunno? outlandish fantasies that are doomed to failure?

something 100 people are employed to not do anything in the name of?

it's ok, project housing was mostly outlandish fantasies doomed to failure, too

i would say there's less chance of a UK poster not understanding a US reference considering the prevalence of american tv and pop culture in general

skip to 7 minutes in on this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8oEaYnm9Fk

otoh "project" in the uk just means .. i dunno? outlandish fantasies that are doomed to failure?

^^ haha UK can't-do attitude!

i would say there's less chance of a UK poster not understanding a US reference considering the prevalence of american tv and pop culture in general

yeah also google

which only works in us contents

To be fair, "council estate" got shortened to "estate" and if you google "british estate" you sure don't get the right thing.

let's not even start on "public schools"

To be fair, "council estate" got shortened to "estate" and if you google "british estate" you sure don't get the right thing.

... or do you?

I have always assumed that nonce was just a variant on ponce.

results may vary
https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=british+estate&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&biw=901&bih=278&sei=lXRXT4n-G6qx0AWm9OzVDQ#q=british+estate&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&tbm=isch&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.r_qf.,cf.osb&fp=a41f185f5fb03db8&biw=901&bih=440

link includes google.co.uk, refuse to acknowledge

"ponce" originally meant a pimp, then came to mean "a gay or camp man", "nonce" comes from "nonsense" and originally referred to sexual offenders in general, is still often used that way but generally connotes "a chester" in 2012

"glassing a suspected nonce in an estate pub" gives altogether a much clearer result

https://www.google.co.uk/search?sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=glassing+a+suspected+nonce+in+an+estate+pub

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTzl14MUyp3qShKPuoMIyOJ-4Mb5-50tDr7FTzJwTwelSoeaKoK2H9NKtdFPA

this just SCREAMS "british estate"

"ponce" and "nonce" still used interchangeably but the former is losing currency in general i think

http://septicscompanion.com/

this is actually pretty accurate