chillness index of fauna

http://www.nwnature.net/birds/images/nw_mallards.jpg

*****

mallards are v v chill

http://www.seawaysdiveschool.co.uk/resources/Basking+Shark.JPG

***

these are chill, i guess, but for all their inoffensiveness they perhaps lack a little charm

as a longtime resident of mn, i have seen mallards. i have also posited the question, on seeing mallards "wait how do ducks fuck?" at which point as if to help me out, they did.

might wanna move them down the index is all i am saying

http://pic.wenwen.soso.com/p/20091221/20091221150246-1921196181.jpg

****

coelecanths are an example of a very excellent animal that is not really amenable to the chillness paradigm

HORSESHOE CRABS

you know who's not chill is those fucking swans

mallards fuck by gang rape, not v chill imo

http://i.imgur.com/DIeft.jpg

*****

supremely chill, thanks to their song, their GIS results are really unchill but they did not choose their own taxonomy

http://www.thedudemag.com/wp-content/gallery/weird-animals/axolotl.jpg

best coasty-style stoner chill? u give the star rating.

Top 5 sleepiest animals

http://www.jennifermarohasy.com/blog/archives/koala%20gunnedah%20compressed.JPG

merdes idk what that is but

****

http://www.geometer.org/Brazil2006/images/Rhea.jpg

*////

This rhea is mad just knowing you exist. Extremely unchill.

http://www.tapir.org/two_tapirs.jpg

**

they're not that interesting

http://www.islandtimethairestaurant.com/panama_08_303.jpg

*****

well obviously

Tapirs are totally fascinating...I am baffled by nahk's assertion.

http://na.oceana.org/sites/default/files/imagecache/320x_explore_photo/explore/creatures/ocean320comsea_003_rep.jpg

****/

Common sea squirt...uncommonly chill.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=715pE23NIm8

http://images.wikia.com/starwars/images/2/25/Sarlacc-BTM-DB.jpg

0 of 5 stars for the sarlaac

http://kevishere.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/harlow.jpg

baby rhesus monkey – **
terrycloth monkey substitute – **** she looks like she's had a few valium

http://www.polatkaya.net/flamingo3.jpg

"we eat so many shrimp i got iodine poisoning" - flamingos

sorry that was supposed to be:

***

http://i.ehow.com/images/a05/g1/4j/do-pigs-cows-tapeworms_-800X800.jpg

**

pigs aren't bad ppl, but they are not ordinarily chill, even though that particular one is maybe ****

turtles are nice little chaps

damn if pigs are ** then I lower my 3 stars for flamingos to 1 star

http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b74/righteouskate/leaftailedgekko.jpg

**

this kind of unreflective obnoxiousness is a bit mainstream bro for my liking.

can't image search atm but dugongs are pretty chill
****?

http://advocacy.britannica.com/blog/advocacy/wp-content/uploads/siberian-tiger0016-004.jpg

***

the siberian tiger is nonpareil, but it isn't chill so much as ~cold~

an ATM is not an animal, VegemiteGrrl.

http://i56.tinypic.com/r2rl78.jpg

**½

an enigma: they murder baby porpoises and celebrate afterwards by blowing bubble rings. unchill humans like to ride on their backs, but that's not really their fault.

xpost neither is a smartass :)

:p

http://www.pachicosecotours.com/images/WhaleWatch3-08025.jpg

***

gray whales are so chill that barnacles grow on them, but can be petty aggro about breaching sometimes

dolphins are not chill

the bigger cetaceans would qualify though

http://i55.tinypic.com/15pfhiv.jpg

****

along with whale sharks, basking sharks are the lumbering sweethearts of the selachii underground

http://i.imgur.com/5HG87.jpg

real chill

http://i52.tinypic.com/of0w7o.jpg

0 stars for these quivering ratlike sweaterclad motherfuckers

***½ for dogs in general

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_sJOJlVzBuB4/SkzO2mcM4MI/AAAAAAAAAHo/2j2Mcgp2mL4/s400/mandrill.jpg

*

they're not chill

this is classic chill:

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/12/14/article-1094657-02CC657D000005DC-117_634x409.jpg

http://www.onthevergeofdatingwhitegirls.com/images/whitedread_1.jpg

****

http://www.aerogarden.org.uk/forum/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/aerogarden-tortoise.jpg

Delightfully chill but I'm knocking off half a star cos I'm not sure they have any choice ****1/2

http://www.reptileknowledge.com/images/inland-taipan-snake.jpg

And yet other members of the reptile family are chippy little bastards

no stars

http://www.ecotours.com/images/dest_md4.jpg

*****

kinda reminds me of venerated classic ilxor 'mark s' for some reason

http://scienceblogs.com/afarensis/Lcatta_sunning.jpg

**1/2

yeah you would think 'sunbathing lemurs, 5 stars no question' but they are projecting a kind of 'cosmic intelligences unconcerned with your puny struggles of life and death' vibe which is kinda orthogonal to the chill scale imo.

http://www.roflzoo.com/pics/042010/screaming-rabbit.jpg

*

chillax, screaming rabbit.

http://www.abdn.ac.uk/~nhi708/classify/animalia/chordata/mammalia/chiroptera/bat.jpg
who is chiller — u decide

did you search for "least chill animal picture imaginable"?

aerial_bombardment.jpg

I feel like the centipede looks pretty chill tho considering circumstances

and the bat is just kinda shruggin' his shoulders at the camera like "heh ok, u caught me, pretty embarrassing"

http://i53.tinypic.com/20pdi04.jpg

This Anomodont dude looks pretty chill, we could hang out and listen to Bo Hansson-

http://i51.tinypic.com/2cz3vqu.jpg

Nevermind.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1198/527105816_3544d54bf0.jpg

*****

przhalsky's horse, wandering the great steppes of chill

omg that horse was my favorite as a little kid <3

(psst it's przewalski's horse btw)

The giant Sonoran centipede, the victim in that bat's mouth, could only be chill if it was already dead. They are some of the least chill arthropods Satan ever conceived!

Also: I would love to listen to Bo Hansson with an Anomodont, even if it ate me in that barren & slightly psychedelic landscape. I cannot imagine what kind of music you would listen to with a giant Sonoran centipede. Diamanda Galas? The recording of that Hell pit?

http://www.birdforum.net/opus/images/thumb/a/ab/Western_Capercaillie.jpg/550px-Western_Capercaillie.jpg

****

capercailies p much live in the woods and moors and do their own thing

they are chill ppl

http://jackiesguineapiggies.com/piggycare/peachysleeping.jpg

**1/2

Surprisingly, guinea pigs can chillax, but even when they are taking lil naps, they still have their eyes open in a manic fashion.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v620/theweaselking/main6/1fc8784a.jpg

Sphynx cat = so chill it doesn't mind nursing alien larvae.

****

Furthermore, it's quite happy to let itself hang all the way out:

http://www.wazaw.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/ugliest_cat_ever1.jpg

also, puffins

http://i55.tinypic.com/2wf4z10.jpg

It goes without saying.

http://www.las-cruces.org/public-services/museums/MNH/nature_center/13texasspinysoftshell_532.jpg

Texas spiny softshell turtle – ???

If you figure it out, let me know, because I am kind of scared of mine.

"we eat so many shrimp i got iodine poisoning" - flamingos

flamingos are the yacht rock of fauna. just hangin out at the marina, munchin on a shrimp cocktail.

parrots = unchill, not least because of jimmy buffett association

also peacocks are part of the "seduction community" hence ZERO STARS for all time

http://www.scientificamerican.com/media/inline/blog/Image/Spanish_ibex.jpg

***

i dunno, they seem like they probably worry a lot. not all that chill. not unchill.

http://blog.hipertechsolutions.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/red+panda.jpg

http://missexpatria.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/albatross-l-stare.jpg

*****

&

**

http://www.coolantarctica.com/gallery/penguins/11_lg.jpg

http://i53.tinypic.com/ju8l7l.jpg

They float all day and sometimes while holding hands.

Pretty chill.

****1/2 ?

Those dudes are furiously relaxing.

chillaxed as hell

http://barbeerians.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/cool-dog.jpg
meme to thread

cool dog chillin in backyard

http://missexpatria.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/albatross-l-stare.jpg

omg omg who is this intense bird? Why was I never in this life an ornithologist???

also ENBB ot(ter)m!If I could be reincarnated I would slough this human form for the forceful powerlove of the otter (sea or river) or puffin physical form@@!

Abbotter! :)

want to defend the chillness of pigs - if you ever meet a pig who's been able to live on into maturity they are remarkably awesome and chill, ****, though they lose a star for screaming when they eat

Abs I'd almost forgotten how cute otters are until I GISd them last night. They're like aquatic teddy bears with the cutest faces. I almost died.

abbott that is an albatross of some sort. looks like a heartbreaker to me.

chillbatross

http://www.campsiecottages.co.uk/images/alpacas_at_ballochruin.jpg

****

alpacas are chill and friendly ppl whose lack of intellectual rigour ought not to be held against them

good choice

http://sciencetrio.files.wordpress.com/2010/07/taz-devil.jpg

*1/2

they are fierce and loud as hell, and are dying of face tumors. deal with it.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/30/Regenwurm1.jpg/597px-Regenwurm1.jpg

****

earth-friendly, sex-positive

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdnwLX5m3G8

()
no stars. Unpleasant neighbors.

these photos of a mass migration of golden rays is def pretty chill:

http://www.dangerousminds.net/images/uploads/man23444_thumb.jpg http://www.dangerousminds.net/images/uploads/man423444.jpg

wow!

Where the manatees at? I mean, does it get much more chill than these guys:

http://vacationinbelize.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/manatees1.jpg

http://www.independent.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00231/ladybird_231833t.jpg

***

they are nice enough, but they make a surprising amount of noise repeatedly slamming against windowpanes which is suggestive of a certain lack of chillness and decorum

http://blog.nola.com/animals/2007/09/medium_mattstick.jpg

giant walking stick: ***** totally goddam chill wtf

dude: ** not so much

http://i.imgur.com/dMbej.jpg

*****

these ppl supposedly kill more africans than any other large mammals, though one suspects it's more through sheer tonnage and proprioceptive deficit than anything resembling malice aforethought

yes!

http://www.droomplekken.nl/uploads/thumbs/ischigualasto_talampaya/thumb_Andescondor%20in%20de%20lucht_800x600.jpg

****

condors are p chill

idk that hippos have a proprioceptive deficit. A hippo can run like 30 miles (48 km) per hour on land. Also idk if you saw "Fantasia" but they also dance ballet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6dv-mP8X80

http://pixdaus.com/pics/1236297013WeziRMi.jpg

how do capys rate on the chillfactor

http://www.aspinallfoundation.org/upload/images/capy1_dr_1268649256.jpg

Oh come on - they're like the chillest of all creatures. Didn't put them here because I figured that was, you know, a given.

idk that hippos have a proprioceptive deficit. A hippo can run like 30 miles (48 km) per hour on land. Also idk if you saw "Fantasia" but they also dance ballet.

― offee is for losers only, do you not c? (Abbbottt), Friday, 22 April 2011 17:02

that's something different, they may be able to summon uncommon power and ferocity but they don't appear capable of conventionally balletic grace or refinement, assumedly owing to neuroanatomical limitations rather than mere pique or laziness

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/96/253479025_304ad5f810.jpg

**

monkfish aren't particularly chill

are capys related to nutrias? I saw a critter like that in israel and was all wtf is that animal???? I concluded it was nutria, but maybe not?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caviomorpha

european wild cat probably not very chill

http://www.cryptomundo.com/wp-content/uploads/0102097343900.jpg

dunno about chillness, but those stingrays are pretty goddamn beautiful.

http://i.neoseeker.com/mgv/436139-Triforce%20of%20Wisdom/139/60/salamander_display.jpg

salamanders v chill imo

Axolotls I am not sure about. If you stare at one long enough, you turn into one. Is that extremely chill, like some chill music making you turn into sand? Or is it extremely unchill?

http://www.shunya.net/Pictures/Tanzania/Serengeti/RockHyrax3.jpg

Hyraxes: live on pee-stained rocks; not very chill

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/00/Axolotl_ganz.jpg

****

they are quite chill for amphibians

nb are you sure about that abbott?

yes

Hyraxes are the antithesis of chill. Evil looking little motherfuckers.

i like them but they operate at an altogether different metabolic level to chill fauna

they are N/A

n/a isn't very chill imo

ya, he is the rock hyrax of ilx

http://cdn2.digitaltrends.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/aardvark.jpg

fuck you guys!

http://www.jbaphoto.com.au/colour/JBAphoto020510D33.jpg

The quokka is a chill marsupial

that monkfish is giving me the heebie-jeebies

The Quokka (Setonix brachyurus), the only member of the genus Setonix, is a small macropod about the size of a domestic cat.[2]

****

i'd never heard of them! that one has a strange colouring

chill fukkin quokkas

http://www.itsnature.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/jaguarundi1.jpg

jaguarundi, ***

chill now, but letting you know it might not be so chill later if you keep standing there

yeesh that cunt looks like a particular vicious juvenile delinquent

/particularly

lol

a beautiful delinquent though

http://pixdaus.com/pics/1215400564fVMgrfD.jpg

http://www.prguitarman.com/comics/poptart1red1.gif

****

p fucking chill

the nose dot always bothers me

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/12/14/article-1094657-02CC657D000005DC-117_634x409.jpg

http://content8.flixster.com/question/30/79/55/3079554_std.jpg

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/db/Colibri-thalassinus-001-edit.jpg/800px-Colibri-thalassinus-001-edit.jpg

0 stars
Hover by rapidly flapping their wings 12–90 times per second: not remotely chill

http://www.australianfauna.com/afimg/boxjellyfish.jpg
Box jellyfish: hard one to rate, in that it languidly just floats about the sea of Australian beaches, which is sort of the epitome of chill, but it also kills lots of people with its poisonous tentacles, which is less so

http://www.top-ten-glasgow-guide.com/images/dromedary-blockade.jpg

***

maybe a little overlooked these days, dromedaries are often castigated for their intemperate qualities....they are still borderline chill tho

hummingbirds are transcendentally chill in the manner of late jmw turner or mid-period scelsi

chill thread imo

http://www.worsleyschool.net/science/files/yellow/pic07western.jpg

Zero Stars

yellowjackets are dicks. they are not chill at all.

http://www.tribblogs.com/tribphoto/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/madagascar-fk3104-950x606.jpg
this fossa looks chill but fossas in general seem like mean, stressed out predator dickheads imo

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/HTML/uploads/RTEmagicC_Sea_Cucumber_small.jpg.jpg

*****

sea cucumbers are some very chill dudes (i don't think they have much of a choice)

that fossa looks both choleric AND slovenly oy vey

empathize, tho

http://cdn.webecoist.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/kakapo.jpg

***

i would call the kakapo docile, or perhaps downtrodden, rather than chill as such. but it's certainly not aggro

Strigops habroptila

yes, that rating seems about right

http://www.whatjamiefound.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/four-toes-jerboa.jpg

**

like many rodents, the jerboa is too neurotic and highly strung to be chill

http://www.dangerousminds.net/images/uploads/man23444_thumb.jpg

Daydreaming about diving into the sea with these guys atm...

every time i see that photo i read it as a pic of fields taken from a plane

http://www.frombearcreek.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Sleepy-Bear.jpg

Their proclivity for eviscerating campers often means people overlook the chillness of bears.

***1/2

Plus hibernating is the big chill. Like calling in sick for a whole season.

http://www.novinite.com/media/inpictures/201105/photo_verybig_5762.jpg

****

coatis are nice ppl and p chill

Woah are they trying to sneak into a ring-tailed lemur party or something?

they are trying to be your friends

:)

Hmm well I dunno if that kind of dissembling is the best way forward but ok I'll give them a chance.

those dudes totally remind of the possums from Bone

http://foxhavenjournal.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/bumblebee-and-lavender.jpg

****

bumblebees have a lot of dignity and they don't want to do any harm to anyone

this is the thread i was looking for to post this in, not "fuck yeah baby animals!" but, fuck yeah! it's chill

http://static2.stuff.co.nz/1306201419/588/5047588.jpg

*****

that is an albino kiwi right?

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5221/5672860254_e4eeabd5cf.jpg

***

they are graceful and well mannered but a bit weird

http://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_lls6d3jmEH1qk5yn3o1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=AKIAJ6IHWSU3BX3X7X3Q&Expires=1306635643&Signature=vt%2B0%2FSV0NZQcp8WfGF%2FF2%2F1j9Dg%3D

chill

apparently kiwi is not albino, it is v rare white variant kiwi.

want to hug puppeh

adorable puppies are adorable and wonderful, but rarely chill iirc

xp

http://scienceblogs.com/corpuscallosum/images/green_toad.jpg

***

idk they are alright i guess, not overly excitable...siemlich chill

( ⌽‿⌽)

http://www.hdpicturesofanimals.com/hd-animals-pictures/turtle-2.jpg

****

nicle little chaps imo

l

http://www.livingworldimages.com/IMG_5225.jpg

http://www.naturephoto-cz.com/photos/mraz/rock-hyrax-05a26056.jpg

*

rock hyrax is one SRSLY unchill motherfucker.

http://i.imgur.com/poJQT.jpg

hedgehog: ***

lol i had just searched this thread to see if hedgehogs were listed

they are ***** imo

I saw a couple tapirs at the Woodland Park Zoo in Seattle this weekend, and I can tell you that they definitely deserve a higher chill rating. They were super fluffy and still, with a high cuddle factor.

Hedgehogs for five stars, seconded.

indisputible

http://www.dlisted.com/files/fathedgehogopenpost1.jpg

fleas tho

lol soapy hh!

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FPjtgamAqCg/SXMw0Cnsq5I/AAAAAAAAFQ4/4cZH7ccou0g/s400/nuthatch+3+2009.jpg

nuthatches are p chill

oh, lets say

****

they are graceful and well mannered but a bit weird

there's this one heron i see every time i go for a run that i swear has gone mad - i run on a path by a river, and for the past 4 weeks every time i've run past its territory it's been standing on the verges pacing back & forth staring up at the houses on the other side as if it's lost something. the ducks who also frequent that stretch sometimes look like they're mocking it. meanwhile the swans just stare at all these lesser creatures (including the humans) with undisguised disdain and disapproval

http://www.bbc.co.uk/bristol/content/images/2007/05/23/cassowary_350x470.jpg

0

cassowaries are the least chill creatures in existence and all the better for it

http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/wireStory/mexicos-water-monster-disappeared-22270445

this is sort of heartbreaking

http://i.imgur.com/MmlBFUt.jpg

*****

the spotted porcupinefish looks chill

The porcupinefish concentrates a poison, called tetrodotoxin, in certain parts of its body such as the liver, skin, gonads and the viscera. Tetrodotoxin is a powerful neurotoxin. This defensive system constitutes an additional device to dissuade the potential predators.[2]

http://www.celsias.co.nz/media/uploads/ORANG_UTAN_BABY_-md34P51716.jpg

Don't know how this thread got so far w/o an orang. Maybe in one of the many broken imgs, maybe they're just too obvious, but *****+ these guys are never not chill

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwL7xUC6LqQ
and i know somebody posted alpacas above, but the pic is broken, and you have to see them in action. fuck llamas, imo

Orang utans are pretty much my favorite creatures in the world (aside from manatees and pugs and toddlers) but I wouldn't say they're chill exactly. They're to silly to be chill! Well, hmmmmm. Maybe adult orangs are pretty chill.

Actually lil ones are too I mean

https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn2/1382333_673563092661397_853587478_n.jpg

only time they're not chill is when they're rampaging through Paris with a straight razor

http://www.distractify.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads//2014/04/vyacheslavmishchenko-4-934x.jpg

*****

omfg so chill

yeah that is zenith chill

almost 200 posts and no mention of sloths? this thread has no cred.

do we have a new gold standard for faunal chillness?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMQvCCBbRK4

WOW that is pretty damn chill

can we get a consensus here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1JDBdohRFc

So, did it piss in the pool?

I don't know how chill it is - it keeps circling in a paranoid manner.

good lord, 0/*****

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I42fEZ23KzY

Siberian tiger chill in the face of exhortations to move out of the road, bad techno.

https://youtu.be/8Ca728OmdBM?t=1m35s

http://i.imgur.com/uxi3ijv.jpg

^a cool 10

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DRA1VS-XkAA9IUN.jpg

^a cool....idk actually. adult maybe 4, kid hasn't learnt The Way yet