Oh dear.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 16 September 2009 22:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
...Checkmate
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 16 September 2009 22:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
CHUTES & LADDERS: THE MOVIE has to be next, right?
― Alex in SF, Wednesday, 16 September 2009 23:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
Connect Four? Mahjongg?
OMG I actually want to attempt a screenplay for Minesweeper.
― franny glass, Wednesday, 16 September 2009 23:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
Ridley Scott is attached to a Monopoly adaptation. I wish I was kidding.
So they've mined the Disneyworld rides, and they're working on the Milton Bradley boardgames next... I can only assume that a big-screen Captain Crunch adventure is just around the corner. Color me jazzed.
― I HEART CREEPY MENS (Deric W. Haircare), Wednesday, 16 September 2009 23:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
The phrase "Ridley Scott's Monopoly" has me confused as to which universe I am in.
― adamj, Thursday, 17 September 2009 00:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
This is about to start principal photography, and stars Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgard, and Rihanna.
The budget is over $200 million. The plot involves the navy fending off extraterrestrials, who presumably fire plastic pegs.
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 15:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
you're lying, you must be
lololololololol
― Squirrel! (HI DERE), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 15:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
― ledge, Tuesday, 31 August 2010 15:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
Taylor Kitsch is a fantastic name
― WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 17:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
they probably won't fire plastic pegs, but everything else i posted was 100% accurate.
got to laugh to keep from crying.
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
They gotta have someone scream "You sunk my battleship!"
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
they have to make that be the only line of dialogue in the movie
― Squirrel! (HI DERE), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
Hope the aliens have divided the earth into a matrix, targeting 'B-12' etc etc etc
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
"how can we see these aliens over this godforsaken wall?"
― ('_') (omar little), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
If they leave that line out it will be the dumbest move since "Connect, only connect" was cut from Howards End
xxp
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
I hope both the navy and the aliens stick to a 'one of each' mentality when assembling their respective fleets.
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Shock and Awe High School (Phil D.), Tuesday, 31 August 2010 20:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
overheard some critics at screening last night say they were going on a Hawaiian junket for this film.
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 1 September 2010 01:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
Glenn Kenny mentioned that on his blog today. Seems kind of pointless, but I clearly don't understand the ins and outs of Hollywood PR campaigns.
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Wednesday, 1 September 2010 01:51 (2 years ago) Permalink
I know, G.K. was sitting behind me (in a Feelies shirt).
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 1 September 2010 01:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
oh, New York.
― a cankle of rads (Gukbe), Wednesday, 1 September 2010 02:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
Liam Neeson, reporting for duty.
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 7 September 2010 19:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
Neeson plays Admiral Shane, the Naval officer whose daughter (played by Brooklyn Decker) is engaged to a young naval officer played by Taylor Kitsch. The pics shoots in Hawaii. Alexander Skarsgaard plays Kitsch's older brother, and Rihanna plays Kitsch's crew mate and a weapons specialist.
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 7 September 2010 19:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
I hope they mean this kind of weapons specialist but I have my doubts:
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 7 September 2010 19:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/battleship.html?showVideo=1#belowNav
welp
― http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_i_qxQztHRI (Princess TamTam), Wednesday, 27 July 2011 17:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
cant wait for the scene where the dying alien says to liam neeson "you... sunk.... my ........ battleship"
― max, Wednesday, 27 July 2011 18:02 (1 year ago) Permalink
Before it even got to the shot in the trailer, I said to myself, "Those alien ships are going to shoot peg-shaped things into the Navy ships to sink them" AND THEN IT HAPPENED PAY ME HOLLYWOOD.
― BIG HOOBA aka the stankdriver (Phil D.), Wednesday, 27 July 2011 18:12 (1 year ago) Permalink
lol max
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 27 July 2011 18:19 (1 year ago) Permalink
Saw this trailer yesterday. had no idea when the big tittied girl was straddling the jock on the beach, that this would be a Milton Bradley production.
― kkvgz, Sunday, 31 July 2011 13:26 (1 year ago) Permalink
I want to commission a Twister movie
"Right foot blue...left hand red...but at the end of the night...someone will be DEAD!!???"
― Neanderthal, Sunday, 31 July 2011 13:35 (1 year ago) Permalink
looks like a transformers movie, meh
but hang on, you're posts suggest this is actually linked to the board game? But I know that can't be correct as that would be RIDICULOUS
― Summer Slam! (Ste), Sunday, 31 July 2011 16:20 (1 year ago) Permalink
your
don't hate me
SYMBOLISM or something
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 7 February 2012 16:33 (1 year ago) Permalink
Related idiocy:
Ever since Universal announced its $200M budget buster Battleship, this sci-fi action adaptation of the Hasbro naval strategy board game has been a big question mark around Hollywood. Now, with just two months before the movie opens overseas in April and then a month later in the U.S./Canada, I’ve learned that Universal has hedged its bet. The studio has secured promotional partnerships amounting to $50 million for TV, print, and online advertising as well as the value of in-store packaging. And that doesn’t even count the cross-company synergy effort within Comcast whose home-owned inventory won’t be charged against actual cost. What’s even more important is that these promotional partnerships have come in response to the studio’s pitch to Madison Avenue for Battleship, with director Peter Berg screening 20 to 30 minutes of footage for partners and exhibitors across the globe. And the feeling is that, if the ad people like it and the theatre owners like it, then the moviegoers may not be too far behind. That’s certainly what Universal Studios COO Ron Meyer, Universal Pictures Chairman Adam Fogelson, and Universal Pictures Co-Chair Donna Langley are holding their breath for. One moment of relief: I’ve confirmed that Comcast chief Brian Roberts recently saw a rough-cut of the film and emerged “all smiles”. (NBCUniversal bigwig Steve Burke hasn’t screened it in its entirety yet.) Of course this is the fickle movie biz and the film could still flop.
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 7 February 2012 16:34 (1 year ago) Permalink
the phrase "extinction level event" in the Battleship trailer makes me think Busta Rhymes albums, not board games, should be adapted as action movies
― some dude, Tuesday, 7 February 2012 18:30 (1 year ago) Permalink
would play Buster Rhymes boardgame
― max buzzword (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 7 February 2012 18:33 (1 year ago) Permalink
― http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1tAYmMjLdY (dayo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 12:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
Just another movie that shows up Hollywood's reluctance to make anything unless it's based on an already existing IP. Probably not the bottom of the barrel though.
Studio exec 1: "OK, so we've got this idea for a hot summer blockbuster. Noughts & Crosses!"Studio exec 2: "It should be Noughts versus Crosses to play up the conflict angle. Do you have a rough draft of the script?"Studio exec 1: "Sure, right here..."
A street in the nightclub/bar area of the city. It is night time. Police sirens wail in the distance.The leaders of two rival gangs (the NAUGHTS and the CROSSES) face off against each other, surrounded by their respective gang members.LEADER OF THE CROSSES: "You're nothing but a zero!"LEADER OF THE NAUGHTS: "Yeah? Well you're gonna be all crossed out!"
LEADER OF THE CROSSES: "You're nothing but a zero!"
LEADER OF THE NAUGHTS: "Yeah? Well you're gonna be all crossed out!"
― White 'Poop' Jesus (snoball), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 12:57 (1 year ago) Permalink
There's some green in that teal and orange film.
― not_goodwin, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:09 (1 year ago) Permalink
awful just awful
― Summer Slam! (Ste), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:40 (1 year ago) Permalink
This is the second dumbest thing Rihanna has ever done.
― Nicole, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:46 (1 year ago) Permalink
what was the first one again ?this looks so awful I'm intrigued !I had forgotten I'd seen the trailer at the movies, previously. My memory must have blocked it !
― AlXTC from Paris, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:50 (1 year ago) Permalink
tragedy this is coming out too late for the action movie poll
― Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:52 (1 year ago) Permalink
THE OCEAN
― watercooler challenge (ledge), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:54 (1 year ago) Permalink
VAST
is anybody remotely prepared for the possibility that this movie could be ... entertaining?
― "renegade" gnome (remy bean), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:57 (1 year ago) Permalink
not that i'm volunteering, mind
i'm always hopeful when it comes to giant spaceship movies.
― watercooler challenge (ledge), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 13:59 (1 year ago) Permalink
the battle for earth begins at sea
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 15:57 (1 year ago) Permalink
o yea I saw this trailer before 'The Grey' the other day—just ridiculous. loved the "FROM THE COMPANY THAT BROUGHT YOU TRANSFORMERS"... did the entire art design process proceed via a series of plastic action-figures?
― Despite all my cheek, I am still just a freak on a leash (bernard snowy), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 16:09 (1 year ago) Permalink
I'm trying to think of what the most ludicrous game movie would be
it's a toss-up between "Ants in the Pants: THE MOVIE" and "Pass the Pigs: THE MOVIE"
― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 18:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
Need a dark, gritty version of
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 18:38 (1 year ago) Permalink
they did that already, it was called "Cabin Fever"
― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 18:39 (1 year ago) Permalink
It's every other summer movie ever smooshed together!
― Fonz Hour (Eazy), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 18:44 (1 year ago) Permalink
Coming This Summer to a Theater Near You: Hi-Ho! Cherry-O: The Movie!
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 18:56 (1 year ago) Permalink
would watch Operation: The Movie
― max buzzword (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:07 (1 year ago) Permalink
also Hungry Hungry Hippos
Hungry Hungry Hippos as a scary when animals attack movie would be RAD
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:09 (1 year ago) Permalink
Mousetrap The Movie: Missing scenes 2, 12, and 19.
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:10 (1 year ago) Permalink
Trying to imagine SORRY: THE MOVIE
― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:14 (1 year ago) Permalink
UNO the movie could be fun. You could skip scenes, go backwards, speed scenes up. Think of all the fun. Fun, goddamnit!
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:17 (1 year ago) Permalink
This summer
You'll be... SORRY
― max buzzword (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:18 (1 year ago) Permalink
Mastermind: The Movie! Directed by Terence Malick.
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:21 (1 year ago) Permalink
After years of languishing in development at Universal, Hasbro announced that Candy Land has moved to Columbia Pictures, with Adam Sandler slated to star and produce via his production company, Happy Madison.
― Gonjasufjanstephen O'Malley (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:24 (1 year ago) Permalink
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:25 (1 year ago) Permalink
somebody google cornhole movie and see if that's been done yet
― Unleash the Chang (he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:25 (1 year ago) Permalink
Changing Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy to STRATEGO and naming each person after a game piece was a missed chance for synergy.
― da croupier, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:26 (1 year ago) Permalink
I'm certain it has, just not the way your local bros play it.
― Gonjasufjanstephen O'Malley (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:26 (1 year ago) Permalink
I heard that they were going to try to make Candyland some kind of weird LOTR quest movie? could be apocryphal, but still, lol
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:26 (1 year ago) Permalink
omg @ Hungry Hippos trailer. HAHAHAHA that is fucking great.
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:29 (1 year ago) Permalink
dudes battleship is ridic enough, none of these jokes are funnier than the fact that they are making a movie about BATTLESHIP
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:30 (1 year ago) Permalink
is someone going to say 'you sank my battleship'?
― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:32 (1 year ago) Permalink
A friend and I like to joke about the gritty reimagining of Connect Four called "The Fourth Connection".
― Mike Love Costume Jewelry on Etsy (C. Grisso/McCain), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:37 (1 year ago) Permalink
Please let the answer be, "Yes, Liam Neeson is going to angrily, intensely say that."
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:38 (1 year ago) Permalink
s1ocki why u not like our joeks?
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:38 (1 year ago) Permalink
im just saying
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:42 (1 year ago) Permalink
See I think it was already a missed opportunity by NOT having Neeson scream that in the trailer.
― Gonjasufjanstephen O'Malley (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 19:43 (1 year ago) Permalink
Connect Four: THE MOVIE
― valleys of your mind (mh), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
^ what i'm talking about
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:06 (1 year ago) Permalink
― Mike Love Costume Jewelry on Etsy (C. Grisso/McCain), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 2:37 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
it'd be a romcom
― valleys of your mind (mh), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:08 (1 year ago) Permalink
it's a competition between two romantic consultants, a la Will Smith in Hitch. They have a friendly wager.
― valleys of your mind (mh), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:09 (1 year ago) Permalink
Risk would be the most boring war movie ever
― Unleash the Chang (he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:11 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/ridley-scotts-monopoly-movie-hires-229944
― Fonz Hour (Eazy), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:25 (1 year ago) Permalink
first thing I looked for was a 4/1 publication date
no such luck
what is even happening JAAAAAAANE LET ME OFF THIS CRAZY THING
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 20:56 (1 year ago) Permalink
Human Centipede: The Game
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:15 (1 year ago) Permalink
*cries*
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:17 (1 year ago) Permalink
battleship potemkin: the game
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:17 (1 year ago) Permalink
das boot: the game
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:18 (1 year ago) Permalink
das boot: das game
― A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:18 (1 year ago) Permalink
hee
Mulholland Drive: the game
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:19 (1 year ago) Permalink
You are on the street
>Look North
You don't know who the fuck you areLez up with Naomi Watts
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:20 (1 year ago) Permalink
Berlin Alexanderplatz: The Game
"Average game play: 375 days"
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:21 (1 year ago) Permalink
irl lols @ aldo
there was this really terrible joel hodgson sketch show pilot that featured a life-size mousetrap from Mouse Trap.
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:22 (1 year ago) Permalink
Troll Hunter: the game
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:23 (1 year ago) Permalink
I would SO play that game
"Troll Stench sold separately"
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:24 (1 year ago) Permalink
>Infiltrate troll cave
Trolls discover you and chase you
>Fire light gun
You are a ChristianTough shitTrolls eat you
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:24 (1 year ago) Permalink
― http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1tAYmMjLdY (dayo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:24 (1 year ago) Permalink
The Wicker Man: the game
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:27 (1 year ago) Permalink
― max, Wednesday, July 27, 2011 2:02 PM (6 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
oh shit i guarantee this is exactly how it's going to end
― piggyback payoff (NZA), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:30 (1 year ago) Permalink
i doubt it, they clearly aim to be taken seriously by the target audience
― RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:30 (1 year ago) Permalink
>Fly seaplane
You are met by villagers in masksYou know there is a conspiracy
>Investigate conspiracy
You are scared by the depth of itEveryone is against you
>Sleep
Rowan tries to seduce youYou refuseYou fucking idiot
>Visit Lord Summerisle
He plays the piano and fobs you offYou could have shagged Britt Ekland, you knob
>Dress up as jester
You are a ChristianTough shitThe villagers burn you
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:31 (1 year ago) Permalink
aldo you're really good at this
― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:35 (1 year ago) Permalink
If only it paid the bills.
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:44 (1 year ago) Permalink
And also, arguably, hie thee to my I Love Comics thread where I have reviewed DC's output for the past six months in order to play fast and loose with my sanity.
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:48 (1 year ago) Permalink
> there is a burned doll
how'd it get burned
― Critique of Pure Moods (goole), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:50 (1 year ago) Permalink
lmao
― max, Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:51 (1 year ago) Permalink
WARNING: you probably need to know something about my references to get the most out of it i.e. you should really understand a fair bit about shitty modern comics to get a lot of it. If you have little idea about who Geoff Johns is and how I hate him you will get less out of it. </pimping my stuff>
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 22:53 (1 year ago) Permalink
I just clicked over and read through that thread. I had used the New 52 as an opportunity to try to get back into DC after many, many years, hoping they'd disentangled continuity crap that I couldn't be bothered with, and after 5 issues I've pretty much given up on all of them except Animal Man, Batgirl and Batwoman. Action and Superman are such a mess I can't be arsed, and Detective started strong and went straight into the crapper. Should I keep up w/Wonder Woman y/n?
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Tuesday, 21 February 2012 23:38 (1 year ago) Permalink
Y
― Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 07:55 (1 year ago) Permalink
to his proctologist:
"i want to have this thoroughly investigated"
― Little GTFO (contenderizer), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 08:35 (1 year ago) Permalink
The Mastermind box deconstruction thread already has the plot of Mastermind: The Movie.
― Stockhausen's Ekranoplan Quartet (Elvis Telecom), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 09:06 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://www.cinemablend.com/new/Rihanna-Wields-Multiple-Massive-Guns-Battleship-Images-29550.html
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 17:12 (1 year ago) Permalink
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 17:13 (1 year ago) Permalink
"YOU CAN STAND UNDER MY UMBRELLA! AND BY UMBRELLA I MEAN MACHINE GUN-UN-UN-UN!"
― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 17:15 (1 year ago) Permalink
rumpapapum rumpapapum shot a battleship down
― piggyback payoff (NZA), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 20:45 (1 year ago) Permalink
Dolores O'Riordan is in this, too?
― (thinks and smiles) (DJP), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 20:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://www.cinemablend.com/images/news/29550/Rihanna_Wields_Multiple_Massive_Guns_New_Battleship_Images_1329851796.jpg
this was the look on her face when chris martin called her to colab
― piggyback payoff (NZA), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 20:48 (1 year ago) Permalink
doh
― piggyback payoff (NZA), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 20:49 (1 year ago) Permalink
i work with some guys who worked on this and claim she's one of the worst human beings on the planet.
― Fetchboy, Saturday, 10 March 2012 03:29 (1 year ago) Permalink
i'm still trying to process how this whole film isn't a colossal joke.
― kurwa mać (Polish for "long life") (Eisbaer), Saturday, 10 March 2012 03:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
wait...how isn't it
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 10 March 2012 03:42 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://io9.com/5892888/liam-neeson-is-commanding-in-his-role-as-red-peg-in-new-battleship-trailer
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 13 March 2012 18:43 (1 year ago) Permalink
That is truly a stupid two minutes.
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 13 March 2012 18:45 (1 year ago) Permalink
Battleship Independence Alien Iron Man Day
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 13 March 2012 18:46 (1 year ago) Permalink
hahahah ugh
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 13 March 2012 18:51 (1 year ago) Permalink
this is one Tim Riggins movie I doubt I will turn the corner on
The trailer was on before John Carter OF MARS last night, and it looked like stupid, stupid, stupid fun. I was almost tempted.
― Sick Mouthy (Scik Mouthy), Tuesday, 13 March 2012 18:54 (1 year ago) Permalink
Oh yay.
http://io9.com/5894180/our-first-look-at-battleships-mysterious-aliens
Alex interrupts him, and sends Cora to the control deck while he leads the alien out onto the deck. He gets the crap more or less beaten out of him, but he and Cora have a plan. He buys her time to aim one of the cannons point-blank at the alien's head. It turns around to see the cannon about to be fired. Rihanna quips, "Mahalo, motherfucker" — and the cannon blows the alien away.
― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 17 March 2012 23:39 (1 year ago) Permalink
Namaste, motherfucker
― ledge, Sunday, 18 March 2012 01:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
peace be with you, dickhead
― arsenio and old ma$e (m bison), Sunday, 18 March 2012 01:19 (1 year ago) Permalink
Go in peace and love to serve the lord, motherfucker
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 18 March 2012 01:28 (1 year ago) Permalink
So that's what a quip is these days
― Not only dermatologists hate her (James Morrison), Sunday, 18 March 2012 07:02 (1 year ago) Permalink
the movie's ... zany sense of humor
Alex tries to win her over by getting her a burrito in five minutes. Unfortunately, the convenience store next door is closed, so Alex decides to break in and get her the burrito anyway. We switch to security cam footage - complete with Pink Panther theme - to see Alex breaking into the store, getting the burrito, and subsequently wrecking most of the merchandise in his attempt to get back out. The scene ends in complete chaos, with Alex running away from - and getting tasered by — the cops, a sequence that causes multiple cars to crash into each other to avoid hitting him. But hey — he gets Brooklyn Decker the burrito, and a true love is born.
Fuck OFF!
― Not only dermatologists hate her (James Morrison), Sunday, 18 March 2012 07:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
"From Hasbro the company that brought you Transformers"
― polyphonic, Sunday, 18 March 2012 07:16 (1 year ago) Permalink
so this sounds like starship troopers done sincerely
the aliens are called "thugs"
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 3 April 2012 11:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
Huzzah
http://io9.com/5899767/first-clip-from-battleship-shows-off-the-aliens-board-game+inspired-firepower
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 6 April 2012 16:45 (1 year ago) Permalink
"B-27!"
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 16:48 (1 year ago) Permalink
this would have been so awesome if it had the exact same cast but was set at a Battleship tournament
― God, Music and Romeo and Juliet (DJP), Friday, 6 April 2012 16:49 (1 year ago) Permalink
battleship the board game involved chain whips? p kinky
― dayo, Friday, 6 April 2012 18:23 (1 year ago) Permalink
haha wow i hadn't heard of this till now, this is easily the most half-baked idea for a movie i've ever heard in my life
it will make back the 200 million opening weekend probably
― the late great, Friday, 6 April 2012 18:37 (1 year ago) Permalink
I can't see this being anything other than a total flop, but I've been wrong many times before.
― stay in school if you want to kiw (Gukbe), Friday, 6 April 2012 19:14 (1 year ago) Permalink
yeah I think there's little likelihood of a John Carter-esque 'you won't believe this but it's actually really fucking great' turnaround.
But then again...Tim Riggins DOES star in this also
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:03 (1 year ago) Permalink
> there is a burned dollhow'd it get burned
― =D (am0n), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:19 (1 year ago) Permalink
lol
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:31 (1 year ago) Permalink
so in all the film has nothing whatsoever to do with the board game? What is the point in paying the money, I'm assuming there was a licence cost, for the rights to use the board game name?
― PSOD (Ste), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:42 (1 year ago) Permalink
just to have the name attached to the movie, I think is what Hasbro wanted
i don't think there was ever much intention to make a movie OF the boardgame - more to reassociate the boardgame with something whizzbang cool so they can remarket it or something idk
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
they should have gone the Tron route. Some kid gets 'sucked' into a real life Batteships board game and has to play the Grid.
― PSOD (Ste), Friday, 6 April 2012 20:58 (1 year ago) Permalink
Or like 20 people in a giant Battleship costume
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:00 (1 year ago) Permalink
That would be some shit-head indie comedy though.
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 6 April 2012 21:02 (1 year ago) Permalink
Michel Gondry/Charlie Kaufman present Tweetleship
baahaha
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
Father and son play battleship, then son gets pulled into a Time Bandits-esque midget alternate universe.
― Brando Ambassador (Eazy), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
Ned I'm still giggling over tweetleship
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:05 (1 year ago) Permalink
How about, (and this comes from currently watching Deathrace - although I'm remembering the original movie rather than this prison variation), in the future people play real Battleships with real ships out in the ocean. Pimped up aircraft carriers and submarines! Televised annual event. etc etc
― PSOD (Ste), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:07 (1 year ago) Permalink
battleships transform into giant robots and do battle in the middle of the ocean
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:09 (1 year ago) Permalink
when i first saw the trailer, thats what i thought was happening for a moment.
― PSOD (Ste), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:10 (1 year ago) Permalink
I hoped, but alas, twere not to be
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:12 (1 year ago) Permalink
― PSOD (Ste), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:24 (1 year ago) Permalink
y are u not in the movie, battleshipformers
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 6 April 2012 21:26 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://io9.com/5907006/8-battleship-clips-unmask-the-alien-invaders-and-they-all-have-goatees/gallery/1
Also the "Mahalo motherfucker" line is here.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 2 May 2012 16:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
Now they should license the rights to make a board game of "Battleship: The Motion Picture" that has nothing to do with "Battleship." Like one of those myriad Monopoly versions or something.
― i love the large auns pictures! (Phil D.), Wednesday, 2 May 2012 16:48 (1 year ago) Permalink
Battleshit
― Roger Barfing (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 2 May 2012 20:48 (1 year ago) Permalink
Battleshart vs Giant Octopus
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 2 May 2012 20:57 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://www.tmz.com/2012/04/27/universal-american-battleship-lawsuit/#.T6BFzMRYuMd
― DavidM, Thursday, 3 May 2012 11:34 (1 year ago) Permalink
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Yr-Y8IeWymo
― DavidM, Thursday, 3 May 2012 11:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
looool
Universal Studios claims its new big budget movie "Battleship" is in jeopardy -- all thanks to a low budget straight-to-DVD knockoff that's coming out
This is what the business world calls "managing expectations."
― i love the large auns pictures! (Phil D.), Thursday, 3 May 2012 12:07 (1 year ago) Permalink
this piece of shit was in jeopardy when they were doing reshoots for like 2 years
― wolves in our wounds (mayor jingleberries), Thursday, 3 May 2012 16:45 (1 year ago) Permalink
hey guys this movie looks really bad!
― goole, Thursday, 3 May 2012 17:05 (1 year ago) Permalink
I don't have much use for this generally cretinous blogger, but he's upset.
I could call it stunningly idiotic alien-invader CG sludge for gamers but what's the point? What it is, boiled down, is yet another metaphor for the decline of civilization as it was once known and nourished by the likes of Norman Mailer, Anne Bancroft, Ernst Lubitsch, Jean Seberg, Gunter Grass, Bernardo Bertolucci, Jean Genet, Rainer Werner Fassbinder, William S. Burroughs, Francis Coppola, Sting, Gary Cooper and Jerry Lewis, et. al. Damn the ComicCon-ers for movies like this. Damn them all to hell.
If Battleship is a state-of-the-art 2012 Hollywood popcorn movie then kill me now. Stab me in the chest with a screwdriver.
http://hollywood-elsewhere.com/2012/05/alien_flotsam.php
Chuckled at "Sting."
― World Congress of Itch (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 15:44 (1 year ago) Permalink
He meant Sting in Dune.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 15:47 (1 year ago) Permalink
I'll gladly stab him in the chest with a screwdriver. Nothing to do with hating on Battleship, mind.
― Fas Ro Duh (Gukbe), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 16:13 (1 year ago) Permalink
get in line
― World Congress of Itch (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 16:14 (1 year ago) Permalink
I can feel the spittle spray from here
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 16:16 (1 year ago) Permalink
Battleship is obviously a popcorn movie, made in hollywood, released in 2012, with state-of-the-art effects. Dude really wants to get stabbed.
― He's sick of the Swiss. He don't like em. (Austerity Ponies), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 17:39 (1 year ago) Permalink
He was hoping for a Das Boot sequel, y'see.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 17:52 (1 year ago) Permalink
would you rather see 2 das 2 booteous or das boot: tokyo drift?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:12 (1 year ago) Permalink
I heard The Das Boot Rises is the darkest one of all.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:15 (1 year ago) Permalink
Das Booty Call
― Scott, bass player for Tenth Avenue North (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:20 (1 year ago) Permalink
i dunno if i'm even pronouncing it right but jurgen prochnow is a very satisfying name to say on any occasion.rafe finnes who i always confuse with liam neeson is a very unsatisfying name to say.
so yes, dude is justified in preferring live free or das boot to battleship
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:22 (1 year ago) Permalink
this was a quality comment:
I dabble in languages and translated Jeff's comments into German then ran them back through Google translate.
Interestingly, they came back as "Who if I cried about BATTLESHIP would hear me among the angelic orders, for BATTLESHIP is only the beginning of a terror I can barely endure."
― World Congress of Itch (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:25 (1 year ago) Permalink
― He's sick of the Swiss. He don't like em. (Austerity Ponies), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:28 (1 year ago) Permalink
Michel Gondry/Charlie Kaufman present Tweetleship― Ned Raggett, Friday, April 6, 2012 9:02 PM
― (Name Withheld to Avoid Hassle) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
still cracks me up
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:50 (1 year ago) Permalink
Rainer Werner Fassbinder, William S. Burroughs, Francis Coppola
― DavidM, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 19:14 (1 year ago) Permalink
Had no idea I should be holding Hollywood films up against a list of The History of Western Literature & Filmmaking 101 Required Summer Reading and/or Viewing.
Also, where does all the Rihanna hate come from? She's just a Barbadian goddess tryin' to make it in this crazy world.
― Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 19:36 (1 year ago) Permalink
I think Wells was just writing a "We Didn't Start the Fire" sequel
― World Congress of Itch (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 19:38 (1 year ago) Permalink
Boggle! The Story of Boggle
― fishermen are coveted by whores & stoners (Pillbox), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 19:53 (1 year ago) Permalink
Dare I make this joke:
Das Boot 2: Eletrik Boot-a-loo
― Scott, bass player for Tenth Avenue North (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 9 May 2012 20:04 (1 year ago) Permalink
(Elektrik)
http://gawker.com/5910266/battleship-director-peter-berg-to-israeli-interviewer-you-gotta-join-the-army-motherfucker
Words fail.
― i love the large auns pictures! (Phil D.), Monday, 14 May 2012 23:19 (1 year ago) Permalink
― Vini Reilly Invasion (Elvis Telecom), Tuesday, 15 May 2012 01:18 (1 year ago) Permalink
Ha, the other day me and my brother were talking about how shit like Battleship makes it feel like we're closer than ever to Coupon: The Movie
― bark ruffalo (latebloomer), Tuesday, 15 May 2012 01:37 (1 year ago) Permalink
I saw the shit out of it!
― wolves in our wounds (mayor jingleberries), Tuesday, 15 May 2012 05:39 (1 year ago) Permalink
If they did manage to make a Hungry Hungry Hippos movie, though, I would see it.
― bark ruffalo (latebloomer), Tuesday, 15 May 2012 05:59 (1 year ago) Permalink
Only if the hippos are something more like Brick Top's pigs in Snatch
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 15 May 2012 06:08 (1 year ago) Permalink
Just occured to me that what the hell is Liam Neeson doing in the U. S. Navy?
Also occured to me that "TRANSFORMERS + Neeson speechifying" is a really good selling point.
― I serve at the pleasure of Dr. Dre and a team of Sorbonne scientists. (R Baez), Thursday, 17 May 2012 02:35 (1 year ago) Permalink
Neeson is more American now than anything. Didn't you see Taken, where he donned the stars and stripes to shoot the shit out of foreigners?
― Fas Ro Duh (Gukbe), Thursday, 17 May 2012 04:07 (1 year ago) Permalink
i think the citizenship test is now just doing the "i have a particular set of skills" monologue
― goole, Thursday, 17 May 2012 04:55 (1 year ago) Permalink
― bark ruffalo (latebloomer), Thursday, 17 May 2012 04:56 (1 year ago) Permalink
lool so apparently I'm seeing this tomorrow for a work outing.
Boy o boy I'm so excited to see Tim Riggins Joins The Navy, Fights Transformers
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 17 May 2012 22:16 (1 year ago) Permalink
The only reviewer that matters (aka Rick Juzwiak, the man who helped codify Punisher: War Zone as the slice of genius it is) takes it on:
http://gawker.com/5911532/battleshit
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 18 May 2012 20:28 (1 year ago) Permalink
Rich Lawson's opinion carries more weight with me and he liked it.
― polyphonic, Friday, 18 May 2012 20:30 (1 year ago) Permalink
He would.
― Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Friday, 18 May 2012 20:53 (1 year ago) Permalink
Um...so I saw it this afternoon and I actually kinda dug it.
....
I know. I'm still working through the realization, lol.
It kinda felt like, Sunday afternoon tv movie rerun, like watching Independence Day or something and just laughing your ass off at the sheer ridiculousness and fun of it all. It was weird.
No matter how much I eyerolled through the lead up, the stuff with the USS Missouri in the final climax was really fucking cool. I swear. I couldn't help myself. I had to grin like an idiot.It totally tapped in to the silly war movie thing without being all 'MURICA FUCK YEAH, totally tapped into the Navy thing without being a recruitment movie... they even use a Gulf War vet amputee as a landlubber hero in a sidebar story and it's a little corny but...I dug it.
It was over the top and it knew it, is what I think it was.
I would have hated it if like, Bay had made it. But Berg just seemed to have fun with it. Didn't take it too seriously, didn't make me watch ten thousand hours of indecipherable giant robot battles...and they did some cheesy shit with working the game into the movie that was kinda funny. And I got my wish: Plemmons and Kitsch pretty much acted out "Landry and Tim Riggins Join The Navy" in almost exact versions of their characters in Friday Night Lights.
I give it 3 out of 5 navy jet flyovers :D Good dumb fun.
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 19 May 2012 03:55 (1 year ago) Permalink
plz tell us you snuck 40'z into the screening
― Choad of Choad Hall (kingfish), Saturday, 19 May 2012 04:12 (1 year ago) Permalink
no alcohol involved
But it would be funny as hell drunk
― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 19 May 2012 04:59 (1 year ago) Permalink