i thought this would be a fun poll so i thought i'd do a brainstorming thread first. what are you mad at george lucas for THE MOST?
stuff like:
- showing boba fett's face (and him as a whiny kid)- greedo shooting first
...etc
i made it '90s onwards so none of you wiseacres can claim the OG star wars movies
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
jar jar binks of course
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
probably the biggest for me, fuckign with the original movies and then getting rid of the negatives (allegedly)
s1ocki beat me to that one
any of the "romantic" scenes in the new trilogy
― the sideburns are album-specific (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
I would have nominated trying to make Brian Benben a movie star but I suppose that's small beer.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
impossible to make a coherent list of offenses
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
Reducing the Clone Wars, which seemed like the coolest idea ever when they were hinted at in the original series, into a bunch of boring bullshit involving "trade federations" and such.
― gayest flash mob pillow fight yet (Pillbox), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
looking like this
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
midichlorians
― goole, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
tehse are all good
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
Greedo shooting first - it totally messes up the impression that the first time audience has about Solo. Han shoots first = sketchy character who you're not sure about for the whole movie.
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
mrs skywalker dies of heartbreak
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
Indiana Jones vs. The Lame CGI & Goddam Aliens Ferfuckssake
― gayest flash mob pillow fight yet (Pillbox), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
fucking up howard the duck (or is that pre-90s?)
― Ward Fowler, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
the kid who played anakin skywalker
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
Why is the thread question in plural? His biggest crime was making more movies.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
when Anakin becomes Darth Vader and then looks up at the camera in the sky and goes NOOOOOOOOOO
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:41 PM (48 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
yes smart guy we know but it's more fun to pick at the insane little details
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
― goole, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 5:38 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
if i made a thread called "the crimes of hitler" i dont think anyone would complain that it shouldnt be in plural because his crime is "the holocaust"
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
not at least trying out a few alternate solutions to whatever is going on with that beard and his chin
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
Please note that utility data for the entire campus is also included. This was the only data made available with the application, and in order to accurately estimate and verify savings, individual building meter data will need to be obtained from the campus.
^^^this, far and away. its one thing to churn out crappy product, lots of aging directors do that (hell, young ones too!), but deliberately screwing up your past work - so that NO ONE can ever enjoy it again, that's a whole other level of unforgivable.
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
what a weird quote
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
I still love the Patton Oswalt bit about how Lucas fucked up all these awesome characters by showing them as whiny kids, "you like Angelina Jolie, right? here's Jon Voight's testicle!".
― the sideburns are album-specific (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
i dont remember anyone saying THAT xp
hahahahah oh man
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
shoudve been this: probably the biggest for me, fuckign with the original movies and then getting rid of the negatives (allegedly)
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
fart jokes in episode 1
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
hahaha that is totally the highlight of my day so far
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
is that his pitch for a campus sex comedy?
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
btw if anyone wants some campus utility data hit me up yo
what drove me NUTS is how he passive-aggressively included the real movie as a "special feature" on the dvd release but not the anamorphic version. SUCH a bitch move.
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
i am giggling like crazy at shakey's c&p gaffe
especially, "^^^this, far and away."
I don't think we can accurately judge Lucas' output without individual building meter data!
― Mariela Ure (jeff), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
the demuppetification of yoda.
― For other uses, see Cornhole (disambiguation). (Oilyrags), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
hahaha the best was the 5 seconds before i realized what happened
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
i thought it was some obscure nugget about lucasfilm's data output and how that proved the originals didn't exist any more or something
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
Agreed. I was just "...wait, what?"
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think the china-town sounding trade federation dudes said something like that in ep 1
― goole, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah i was like
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
Co-incidentally, someone was here to read the meter this morning.
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
does anyone have a cite to the real individual building meter data from Ep. 2? is that on the DVD?
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Begun this data scrub has."
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
i am dying at my desk here
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
promising to make "small, personal" films only to immediately return to raping our childhoods with his big cgi dick
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
no matter how much i do like spielberg, i downgrade him for pulling a few of these lucas-style moves in his career, too.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
totally... ET gun/walkie thing
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
also to answer the thread question
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
i've never forgiven george lucas for starting yourprops.com
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
cannot BELIEVE lucas tried to make us get individual building meter data
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
i was talking about the baseball hat
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
well if the point of the thread was to start a poll over what was specifically the worst of his crimes, people might
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
The rest of us just get a yourprops.com logo placeholder.
― the sideburns are album-specific (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^ this, far and away -- if you can't get individual building utility data out of the application, how are we supposed to verify savings?
oh no I mean: the prequels had maybe a bit much of sorta ethnic-typed aliens, which I think we've discussed plenty before
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watto
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
lucas and spielberg represent a lot of people in hollywood who apparently think the audience just can't handle moderately edgy shit anymore.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
― da croupier, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:54 PM (47 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
let us not split hairs and have this dumb argument, everyone knows what i meant. can we just keep laughing about the meter thing
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
i have GONE OFF about this before, but what really drives me nuts is that the basic scenario laid out in the prequels is really interesting! but they are still horrible. it's like someone made three really horrible movies out a great novel about a despot's rise to power. except there's no such novel. it's the weirdest thing.
xp yes wtf how can u introduce the idea of SLAVERY in the universe and then not address it ever again
― goole, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:55 PM (20 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
and yet you see a transformer's balls in TF2 :(
not splitting hairs, slocki, the observation wasn't earnest
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
gotcha
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
balls are funny lol : D
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
nb I am usually less morally "offended" by ethnic-type aliens (though there's maybe a bit of that with Watto or JarJar) and more just aesthetically offended, like ... please actually make up a fucking alien from your head and not just animate some CGI Central Casting Stock Mildly Offense Ethnic Archetype shit
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
knowing what little i do know about producers via my limited interaction w/them, i can say that they're mostly total retards who get bored by difficult films like 'heat' and 'the departed'
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah i think that's why everyone hated them nabisco
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
so a couple of giant nuts swinging to and fro onscreen would naturally be the most hilarious thing imaginable to them xp
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 17:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
adding a candy-ass scream to luke's climactic fall in Empire so that his suicidal rejection of darth becomes "OH SHIT, I SLIPPED!"
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
maybe he was just psyched to be getting away from his freak dad
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
han solo stepping on tiny jabba's tail in episode iv
^
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
to be fair, swinging close-up IMAX testicles would be marginally funny for 30 seconds or so, and will probably feature in a Baron-Cohen movie at some point
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
making people call star wars "episode IV: A New Hope"
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^^^^^^^^^
that, too me is the greatest crime
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
omg totally
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
like seriously, from teh coolest movie title ever (at least when you're a kid), STAR. WARS. to... "a new hope."
or making Raiders into Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
A New Hope that Lucas will stop fucking with Star Wars
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
it sounds like some corny-ass mandy moore flick about the summer after high school
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
her name is "hope" in the film
Anakin: I killed them. I killed them all. They're dead, every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. They're like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals. I HATE THEM!
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
haaaaa xp
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
this is kinda funny: http://www.starwarsuncut.com/
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
The CGI "celebration sequence across the galaxy" in Return of the Jedi, the updated version. Like the Ewok song was bad enough George.
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
"death sticks"
― Grip Tape And Some Wikked Trucks (Deric W. Haircare), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
can't imagine what a kid who's already seen I-III would think of "A New Hope." But then any kid that actually sat through I-III without the memory of the original trilogy is already unfathomable to me.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
ya i mean, if you watch them "in order" does it make any kind of sense?
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah it's weird to think that someday (if not already) there will be folks who will naturally gravitate towards watching the six films in numerical order
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
like doesn't it completely undercut the big darth is luke's father reveal??
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
I keep drilling my 8 year old son over and over again that Empireis the best, but Ep III is his favorite. "Anakin's annoying.""So what, he's cool. And I like droidekas."
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
droidekas?
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
This is probably more of a good thing than a crime, but that the key battle scene between Anakin and Obi Wan Kenobi appears to be entirely modelled on the Black Knight scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:
― Keith, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
what a disaster this will be for whatever young mutant would actually watch them all for the first time in numerical order
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
you'd like to think by halfway through Clones they'd just put on some brokencyde and play a video game
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
ya im just sayin!!
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
i guess what really pissed me off is that when i watched the original trilogy i there were passing mentions of a young anakin/vader, i always imagined this amazing charismatic, grim, kinda sociopathic dude who would be played by some epic actor, but then they toss it to some asshole who comes off like a fratboy killer from some episode of csi: miami.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
"and there"
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
that's almost too complimentary to hayden christiansen
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
what bugs me even more is that young badass obi wan turned out to be such a drip... he really should have been the han of hte series...
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah i mean alec guinness was kind of weirdly imposing, right? and ewan mcgregor came off as kind of...short?
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh god yeah crime no. 35235: Obi-Dan Fogelberg
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
The alterations made to the Jabba's palace scene...ughhh
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
they always implied that obi-wan was a real loose cannon and his recklessness is sorta what "made" darth vader
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
Darth Maul sure was thrilling, though, no? With his Mudvayne make up and everything?
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
insertion of Hayden Christensen ghost at the end of Jedi was particularly grating and is a handy symbol for the new films poisoning the old ones.
― Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh remember when obi wan and liam neeson double-teamed him? that was so cheap!! they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
it's such a basic rule, the GOOD GUYS are supposed to be outnumbered
Its been hinted at, but it needs to be said - CGI Jabba.
Motherfucker had GRAVITAS when you just assumed that he was moved by people, based on his influence. Now, thanks to Colonel Neck Retention Chinstrap's merciless fucking about, Jabba is a slug, skirting around freighter bays on Mos Eisley.
― I got it. I'm gone. (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
half the OG characters were these free-wheeling assholes too, and everyone in the new trilogy was really inert and studied.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
[/i]
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
god when i saw those remastered/restored star wars movies... digital jabba made me really sad xp
― ian, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
― I got it. I'm gone. (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:16 PM (36 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
totally totally
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
i gotta say i thought macgregor was a great obi wan but its not hard to look good in those movies
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
seriously, the whole awesome thing about jabba in return of the jedi was he didn't move
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
they also double-teamed count dooku, an elderly man
Bad image. Very bad image.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
i thought macgregor got the voice down 100% and he was ok in some ways, but his physical presence was nil imo
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:17 PM (40 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
he had the voice down and he seemed game but he had nothing to do but frown and scold
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
xp haha
possibly because they made him wear a rattail
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
You want gravitas? Jimmy Smits had gravitas.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
i guess macgregors obi-wan should have been the WORST thing in a potentially amazing star wars prequels and instead it turned out to be the best
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
The idea that nearly every jedi in the universe can be killed by a bunch of regular dudes in one fell swoop, and without each death being an incredible epic battle, drove me insane.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
you know, in theory I appreciate trying to make Anakin's move to the dark side feel like the result of a personal/emotional tragic flaw as opposed to an intellectual decision, but holy geez did they take this way too far, even despite all the crappy exposition, basically making his change into Vader feel like the result of just being a jackass teen-rebel wannabe who fell in with the wrong crowd
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
a list of what people praised from lucas '90s on is just about as embarrassing as his crimes.
YODA FIGHT WOW!!!!
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
i mean there's the banality of evil and then there's just the banality of these movies
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
to be fair to ewan tho what would you do if you were cast as OBI WAN FUCKING KENOBI and you show up to the set the first day and find out you have to do a scene opposite the kid from jingle all the way and stepin fechit inside a blue room?
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
Did you know that Anakin cannot possibly attack Obi-Wan effectively when Obi-Wan has the higher ground? The things you learn.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
the campy bad guys were the only good part of the prequels: dooku and emperor were over the top
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
big crime for me: making rational adults see the prequels multiple times until they "kinda liked it" by holding a lightsaber to their inner child's neck
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
How come every fucking scene in these movies involves someone standing in front of a window with a million fucking things happening in the background.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
― da croupier, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:21 PM (26 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
haha i remember how desperate i was at that point to find ANYTHING redeeming about the movies that people would ask me how it was and i would be like, YODA FIGHTS!!! and theyd be like yeah but is it good and id say YODA FIGHTS A DUDE and theyd say youre not answering my question and then i would go cry somewhere
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
YODA FIGHTS DOOKU yeah for about 15 seconds...
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
one thing i liked about the originals was the fact that around the margins there were all of these minor roles filled by these really solid character actors that helped fill in the universe a little more without overly explaining it, whereas the new films had none of that, just the occasional smits/sam jackson/terence stamp star cameo bullshit.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
like the entirety of the empire's fleet was commanded by bbc regulars, i loved that
i mean i've been over this abt 6934873208 times with my friends but ppl can be forgiven imo for having blinders on through episode 1 and even episode 2.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
OMG esp. when Han stepped on his tail & Jabba's comic exclamation. That really should have tipped all of us off that this man was no longer to be trusted with his own mythos.
― gayest flash mob pillow fight yet (Pillbox), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 6:06 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 6:07 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark
Read some thing on the net arguing the best order to watch them in for the first time would be I, IV, II, V, III, VI, which kind of makes sense if you think about it.
― chap, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
Or that Admiral Piet was managing Slade at the same time?
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
T/S: Peter Cushing vs. fake Japanese lizard spice federation trader
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
> YODA FIGHT WOW!!!!
Seriously, that sucked bad. He should be a total effortless zen master Sam the Seed type, not a hyperactive squirell with a glowstick.
― For other uses, see Cornhole (disambiguation). (Oilyrags), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
Best order surely IV, V, VI, I, II, III, IV, V, VI ?
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
IV, V, VI, I, I, V, VI, II, I, II, III, II, IV, V, VI
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
So true. Every so often one of them would turn up in a series I'm watching and I'm all "Hey it's that guy!"
A favorite example -- Christopher Malcolm, Saffron's dad in Absolutely Fabulous = dude who is flying around in the snowspeeder looking for Han and Luke on Hoth. He was also the original Brad in the first London production of The Rocky Horror Show.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
this thread's making me want to watch IV for the first time in years
i'm afraid i won't like it now though and i really want to retain my childhood 'best movie ever' memories of it
― extremely demanding on the hardware (ciderpress), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
Terence Stamp should have played and evil cockney Jedi called General Zod.
― Keith, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
IIRC - wasn't the original Anakin - as in, the one revealed at the end of Jedi - British?
Like, what the fuck making him sound like a kid from the Valley?
There really are so very many things wrong with everything done in the world of Star Wars after Return of the Jedi, and all its subsequent toy releases. Because lets be honest - there were some badass toys for the first three.
And Darth Maul. Motherfucker should NOT have been killed in one movie.
― I got it. I'm gone. (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
― chap, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:25 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
actually watching the prequels now in any order you put them makes no sense at all
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
motherfucker should not have been in one movie imo
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
i will never get tired of complaining about these movies
maybe that was the greatest gift george lucas ever gave us :)
seriously, he's like the most reliable punching bag in cinema history
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
what's funny is i do think there is some good shit in II and III (very sporadically in II, mostly when obi-wan is off playing detective on other, weird planets), but it's all trumped by epic fuckups.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
I thought the prequels had ruined the originals for me, but when Return Of The Jedi was on Spike I went into childhood nostalgia overdrive even as I groaned through the new CGI and admitted to my star-wars-ignorant gf that "this is really stupid."
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
the opening sequence of III is pretty great as is the big fight at the end, as long as you forget about monty python
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
did we bring up darth's NOOOOO in III yet?
ya
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
sorry i mean yaaaaaaaaaaaaa xp
what 2 has going for it is that it's better than 1. could never bring myself to watch 3.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
2 is worse than 1
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
although they're both pretty bad
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
how lame is it that he doesn't actually kill her
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
ok the thing about 1 is that in addition to being terrible it provides absolutely nothing to the story arc. i mean it could literally not exist and you could pick up just fine w/2.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
there are some neat visuals in episode ii. i like that rainy clone-maker planet and that harryhausen monster gladiator arena toward the end.
but yeah, the movies are garbage.
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
This thread is depressing me. I've been living in an OG bubble with my precious memories and was unaware of the extent to which Lucas had totally ruined everything.
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
2 has some bigger peaks than 1 imo but the valleys are abysmally deep
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
love scenes between two of the most wooden actors in cinema history in ep. II
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
yes the clone-maker planet or whatever in II, that's pretty great. everything else i guess is pretty horrible.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
i like this picture, because vader is all "NOOOOO" but the emperor is all, "dude, yesssss!!!!"
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
i guess all i am saying is that even tho the romantic scenes in 2 are some of the worst ever committed to film, they advance the overall story--more than could be said about anything that happens in 1.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
i liked the wookie planet, was that 3? it has some crazy name like kashhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyykkkkkk
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
not sure if portman is less embarrassing in the star wars prequels or in garden state
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
wasn't the original Anakin - as in, the one revealed at the end of Jedi - British?
maybe being British is just indistinguishable from being half-robot and not having had sun on your skin in decades
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
that's what i call pod racing!
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
Thought Hayden was pretty good in Shattered Glass, and have liked Portman in some things. I hear that Lucas didn't exactly do a lot of takes, or give notes, or etc.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
didn't mind dude in shattered glass but he was a toolbar in Jumper and I have yet to see his Dylan
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
lucas is a closet bressonian
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
its a way of life
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
May the farce be with you...
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
― schwantz, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, I mean: "I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth."
― Detroit Metal City (Nicole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
immortal dialogue imo
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
christensen is great in shattered glass but he's supposed to be playing unlikeable
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
whereas anakin should have SEDUCED the audience with his charms before turning bad... you really should have been onboard with him for like 2.5 of the movies
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
that would have been awesome. rip childhood :(
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
he never "turned bad," though, he just sort of had a tantrum and then eventually fell in some lava
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
um he slaughtered an entire school full of jedi
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think another problem was starting anakin's story when he was a child, i think that all we needed to see was maybe some flashback to him being born and then flash-forward to him as a young adult, skipping all the other shit.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
he might as well have huffed off to his bedroom, slammed the door, and then come out Vader the next morning
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol
― Keith, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
I find it hard to blame the actors in these fucking movies at all. Yeah Christensen might be a shitty actor (though I'll echo the praise for his performance in Shattered Glass) but Lucas just obviously did not give a shit about the human performances.
― congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
This isn't nineties, but I ate this a couple of times as a kid, making faces a lot like the one below:
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
it was like when butters turned into professor chaos
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
xpost - haha Que I mean despite the attempt at a drawn-out exposition filled seduction of Anakin to the dark side, he generally just seemed like he got pissy and decided to be bad, there was nothing even resembling like a tragic and conflict-filled change of character
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
I find it hard to blame the actors in these fucking movies at all. Yeah Christensen might be a shitty actor (though I'll echo the praise for his performance in Shattered Glass) but Lucas just obviously did not give a shit about the human performances
^^^^ Although it does make me wonder if the rumors about the Tom Stoppard polish on Episode Three are true. What good was it if none of the actors knew how to deliver the dialogue?
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
hahaha "C-3POs -- the breakfast that's both effeminate and contains metal"
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
"i'll try spinning, that's a neat trick!"
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
think another problem was starting anakin's story when he was a child, i think that all we needed to see was maybe some flashback to him being born and then flash-forward to him as a young adult, skipping all the other shit.
the prequels are a really good cautionary tale for when you're writing something, be it a novel or a movie script. if you've got some backstory that explains how characters got the way they were, either make it brief or incorporate it into the story. or drop it. don't go back into the past and show us darth vader hitting puberty.
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
btw shakey's c&p upthread had me dying
"Please note that utility data for the entire campus is also included. This was the only data made available with the application, and in order to accurately estimate and verify savings, individual building meter data will need to be obtained from the campus."
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
i would love to see the meter data on natalie portman's individual building
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
lolll
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol I am the only person here who doesn't hate these movies
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
stoppard polish rumor, gimme a fuckin break
― goole, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
btw can i just
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
Was Anakin's little friend in Ep. 1 actually Greedo? Because if so, then that.
― Grip Tape And Some Wikked Trucks (Deric W. Haircare), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 18:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
Nah.
hahahahha ned!
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
topnotch caption
had it with this motherfuckin utility data on this motherfuckin etc.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Join me, and together we will collect the individual building meter data!"
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh! every fucking jedi council in these movies was so lame! also whenever they're in the galactic senate and there are some fucking et's floating by--that sucked
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Where is that individual building meter data?"
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
jesus christ really? it's like everything that should not have been linked up between the two series was, and everything that needed to be was not
his worst crime imo was that in a very bored moment at work i started rewriting one of the scenes from the 1st one that in half-remembered form was still bothering me. he made me do this.
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
McDiarmid is pretty good but he's not an emperor, he's the chicken hawk who hits on Chris in "The Family Guy."
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
"I love utility data!"
"I know."
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
those really are the two most boring sentences i've ever seen in the english language, it's amazing and hilarious
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol I am the only person here in the universe who doesn't hate these movies
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:58 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
Dammit you just beat me to the punch latebloomer.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
dammit latebloomer I was about to post that
also my wife likes all six of these movies more than everyone here put together
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
Caption this one.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
you guys are killin me
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
I also do not hate these movies, Dan. I went to Star Wars Celebration in L.A. in 2007 and watched all six in a row for 17 hours.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
"There...is...an...oth...er...BUILD...ING...MET...ER."
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
"I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth."
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah as far as the devil being in the details, anakin's hair is sort of a nice summation of the crimes of george lucas ('90s on).
― us_odd_bunny_lady (tipsy mothra), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
haaaaahaha Ned people in my office are looking at me like I'm crazy now because of the wang laughing
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
It is a period of civil war.Rebel metermen, strikingfrom a hidden base, have wontheir first victory againstthe evil campus utility.During the battle, metermenspies managed to steal secretplans to the utility'sultimate weapon, the DATASTAR, an armored spacestation with enough savingsto destroy an entire endowment.Pursued by the utility'ssinister agents, PrincessLeia races home aboard herZipcar, custodian of thestolen plans that can save herpeople and restorefreedom to the sophomores....
During the battle, metermenspies managed to steal secretplans to the utility'sultimate weapon, the DATASTAR, an armored spacestation with enough savingsto destroy an entire endowment.
Pursued by the utility'ssinister agents, PrincessLeia races home aboard herZipcar, custodian of thestolen plans that can save herpeople and restorefreedom to the sophomores....
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
what are the best of the non-parody, non-turkish fan-edits of this series? i want to have a star wars marathon but don't want to inflict the official versions on anyone.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh, forgot about this choice but of dialogue:
Anakin: Are you an angel?Queen Amidala: What?Anakin: An angel. I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
er, choice bit
"I find your lack of data disturbing."
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
Maybe a moderator can take out Shakey's quote and replace it with something that appears to be a bit more conforming.
― http://tinyurl.com/lrhdut (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
Dan I was looking for that so thank you.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
Anakin: Are you an angel?Queen Amidala: What?Anakin: Never mind. But when I grow up I want a piece of that, okay?
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
thank god no one is sitting next to me today.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
This thread is way more entertaining than the prequels.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
Dark Helmet: What's the matter with this thing? What's all this churning and bubbling? You call this individual building meter data?Colonel Sandurz: No sir, we call it 'Mr. Coffee'. Care for some?Dark Helmet: [pause] Yes! I always have coffee when I watch utility data for the entire campus. You know that.Colonel Sandurz: Of course, I do.Dark Helmet: Everybody knows that!
― Mariela Ure (jeff), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yoda: Good relations with the Wookies, I have.
ew
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
How old are Anakin and Padme when they start knocking boots?
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
"You've never heard of the Millennium Falcon? She's the ship that collected the individual building utility meter data in less than 12 parsecs."
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
bow down
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
― mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
Not too much different from the actual Episode I crawl tbh
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
we have a winner
― Mariela Ure (jeff), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
classic
btw there's apparently only a 5 year gap between P & A so that's not as skeevy as I originally thought it was
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
took these at ALA this week, seems relevant:
― congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
They were handing out compiled individual building meter data.
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
ACRL didn't have stormtroopers, what a ripoff.
― Detroit Metal City (Nicole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
"downloading ur individual building utility meter data"
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
Please note that this is not the utility data for the entire campus that you are looking for.
― joygoat, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
holy shit s1ocki
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Please note that utility data for the entire campus also included is. This the only data made available with the application was, and in order to savings accurately estimate and verify, individual building meter data obtained from the campus will need to be."
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol at snoball
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
wtf I don't even remember yoda and the wookies
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
Ok, I've tried reading about this, but I can't understand it. What does a non-anamorphic DVD release mean? Is the picture squished?
― Emmet Otter's SugBan Christmas (The Yellow Kid), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
holy fuck this thread is classic
― la saucisse est une femme? (Euler), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Non-anamorphic" means the metachlorian count is unusually high for a major studio release.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Emmet Otter's SugBan Christmas (The Yellow Kid), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 3:37 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
it means the black bars at the top and bottom are actually part of the image itself. so if you watch it on a widescreen tv, it just floats in the middle with black bars on ALL sides.
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
IT'S SICK.
does the movie at least bounce around the screen
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
Please note that utility data for der entire campus also included is. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! Dis der only data made available with der application was, and in order to savings accurately estimate and verify, individual buildin' mesater data obtained from der campus will need to be. Oh. Flbulbulbu.
― joygoat, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
Flbulbulbu otm
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
how long did it take to translate that into jive, joygoat?
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
I don't the age gap was the bulk of the weirdness on this one!
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
^ "think"
There still exists on the internet a Jar Jar Binks translator: http://www.elibs.com/e/funkatize
― joygoat, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
"You would prefer some other utility data? Perhaps individual building meter data? Then name the system!"
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
The age gap wasn't that big, but for that age group it is still pretty bizarre for a woman to be dating someone that much younger.
― Detroit Metal City (Nicole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
Baby cougar mama drama
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
the Jar-Jar Binks translator may have changed my life forever
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
I'll put it this way
5-year age gap = who cares
you're a 32-year-old woman who meets a 27-year old you used to babysit for as a kid and now he seems cute = go for it
you meet a child and are sort of around as he goes through adolescence and then as soon as he's getting grown up you get with him = did Woody Allen work on this script?
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
ha! i was wondering how long it would take for ian to get here...
And tis taken even longer for mesa to get back. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa!
Mesa was crushin' on old-school Hillary Clinton (in her Twenties) -- probably because she wesasembles mesa supremely attractive friend Erin (who, despite likin' mesa, is with someone else wight now and so she's horribly unattainable). Huh? Goodness gracious, Mesa'm an absolute sucker for blondes derse days. Way? Esqueeze mesa. But after droppin' by a bookstore yesterday where mesa long-time friend Molly (who is not a blonde, mind yousa) works -- oh goodness, she's always shtunnin' but yesterday Mesa wesaally wanted to pounce on her because she looked so exceptionally scrumptious (without even tryin'!) and was just so bubbly and charmin'. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesa wanted to playfully tackle her behind der counter and from derre on it would've been wonderfully inappropriate! Anyhow, she's invited mesa along to dinner and some other event with a group ta her friends on Friday -- tis not a date essentially, but at heart Mesa wouldn't mind if it twisted into one. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Ooh, Mesa just wesamembered that she complimented mesa appearance! No-one ever does that! Squee! Cuddlestein Mountain! Nuvvieworld! okeday, Mesa'm just gettin' widiculous -- Mesa'm just excited because tis a prospect to escape social poverty with a possibulhint ta womance. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesa'm probably bein' toosa optimistic; Mesa can't help it! Mesa've wanted somethin' to look forward to!
― Ian Riese-Moraine: a casualty of social estrangement. (Eastern Mantra), Tuesday, August 16, 2005 2:41 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
Oh dear.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Where were you guys?"
"We ran into a meter whose utility data was the only one made available on the application."
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, I'm seven years old than my husband, which is no big deal, unless we started dating when I was in senior in high school and he was ten. (We did not.)
xp
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
you meet a child and are sort of around as he goes through adolescence
Dude, he says at the beginning of Episode II he hasn't seen her in ten years; i.e., ages 9 through 19.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
you meet a child and are sort of around as he goes through adolescence and then as soon as he's getting grown up you get with him =seriously though exactly how many roles has Morgan Freeman played where his character could be described as "wise" or "a seasoned veteran" or "jaded"
― velko, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
Does anyone else feel like Padme gets YOUNGER as these movies goes on instead of older?
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
Dan, I see you and raise you:
---
I had a friend who would chew up two hula-hoops and dern deposit der chewed up gloop inside der O ta a third hula-hoop. Way? Esqueeze mesa. dern she'd eat it. Oh. Flbulbulbu.
Yup, Mesa used to do dis. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Mesa'd also chew up a couple ta pringles and use der wesasultin' paste as a sandwich spread between two intact pringles. Oh, NOOOOO!
-- Markelby (boyincorduro. Way? Esqueeze mesa.), April 20th, 2005 10:57 AM
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
Well, she acts like a seven-year-old by the time Anakin breaks her heart.
(xpost)
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh my god
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 3:45 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
^^ best yet
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
what, I'm supposed to change my mockery based on remembering actual factual details from these films? I think not
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
but ok fine, then, I guess she can hit that
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
now say it like Yoda
hit that, she can
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
Well, you can continue mockery based on the fact that she barely even recognizes him, while he's apparently perved on her from afar for ten years.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
a pervert you think she is then, yes, Pancakes? mmm? mmm?
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
he's using the force like one would use x-ray glasses
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yup. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesaf yousa spend long gettin' friendly before yousa brin' 'Mesa want to be on yousa' into it, dern yousa'wesa kind ta betrayin' whatever friendship yousa've established beforehand. Oh. Flbulbulbu. She's gonna think yousa wesare sweaty-palmin' it all along (which yousa wesare), and it might make things difficult for a while. Oh, NOOOOO!
And yousa know dis, that's why yousa (probably) never wesaveal der sexual tension yousa've built into yr. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! 'friendships', thus sparin' yrself der ugliness. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! And possibulblowjobs. Way? Esqueeze mesa.
Moral: yousa have to be creepy. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Yousa have to make yousar fuck-want clear from der beginnin', even if yousa choose to go smooth and disguise it as 'womantic interest'. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesa understand that der womantic interest woute is bery popular. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa!
Mesa didn't get fucked, didn't get kissed until Mesa was in mesa 20s. Huh? Drove mesa fuckin' cwazy. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Mesa obsessed about it and about mesa own sexual loserdom to der point ta incapacitatin' mesantal illness and listenin' to Swans wesacords. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Dern Mesa got drunk, hooked up with a lovely and similarly enabled girl, and . Way? Esqueeze mesa. wesall, let's discreetly draw der blinds on der indiscretions ta der past. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks!
Disagree that gettin' laid is not a curative, though. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Tis a curative. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Mesa never worried about it after that, and never had trouble makin' mesa intentions clear to girls Mesa liked. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa!
― Adam Beales (Pye Poudre), Wednesday, January 17, 2007 2:38 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
I would maybe just reframe my mockery to say it seems a bit of a psychological stretch to imagine a beautiful and successful 24-year-old queen going for a petulant teenager she met once when he was 9, and moreover I think we ALL KNOW where this crappy dating decision led
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
This thread is one of my all-time favorites. All time.
― NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dude, yessssss! (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
arsas far as tits go, bigger is better. Way? Esqueeze mesa. mesa gf has two wound wobust milky white 38Ds, with dark brown nipples that spread 3 in across her beautiful tit flesh. Huh? i've been with lesser woman and have not had similar pleasure, especially der ones that are all nipple. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! mesa cock toosa is a thin' to behold. Oh. Flbulbulbu. mesa gf mesaasured it at 8.5 in ta dark brown veiny mesaxican cock. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! uncut, ta course. Huh? it took her about 2 yrs to be able to swallow it all. Oh, NOOOOO! but she perfected der art ta deep throatin' mesa shlong. Oh, NOOOOO! i've seen other guys at der urinals and dery see mesa. Oh, NOOOOO! i'm blessed with a flaccid cock mesaasurin' almost 7 inches. Oh, NOOOOO! most guys have little peepees peekin' out ta derir flies. Huh? i have a snake. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! thank u bery much!
-- stephen garza, Friday, January 10, 2003 9:50 PM (5 years ago)
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
I suspect Dan and I are not helping Nabisco's patient outlining of the general problem.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
I wonder how the universe would have wound up if she'd been into Macgregor instead
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
Suddenly, everything was dark and smelly.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
xx-post -- What the hell is that and why are you making us look at it.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
possibulblowjobs
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, yousa told mesa and that evenin' Mesa vowed never to accompany kev through customs. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! Dery are kiwi sized but don't appear out ta proportion next to his large cock. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Far from bein' circus-freak like, he is jaw-droppingly awesome. Oh, NOOOOO! Wha a guy. Oh, NOOOOO! Mesa can't wait to get home and climb aboard his grocery groin. Oh. Flbulbulbu.
-- Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Wednesday, March 3, 2004 10:09 AM (Wednesday, March 3, 2004 10:09 AM) Bookmark Link
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
"grocery groin"? With that and the pic posted above, this thread is taking a surreal turn.
― Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
we've gone straight through some kind of custos event horizon itt
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
Lucas is reading this right now; he's been googling his name all day and now has his script for next film.
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
we should be so lucky
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol 'grocery groin'
― mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
co-workers will soon notice
must stop reading thread
― pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, wesall, Mesa'm married to a curvy Colombian woman, so der flowers ta indie wock womanhood look decidedly dingy and drab to mesa, and always have. Oh, NOOOOO! Der indie world's concept ta sexy is bery closely wesalated to its concept ta 'wock': limp, non-threatenin', far more interested in talkin' than fuckin'. Way? Esqueeze mesa. -- unperson, Monday, January 7, 2008 7:51 PM
― well I'm married to a limping, crescent-shaped abortion (sarahel), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
Neddo Raggetta: "What the hutt-slime is that and why are you making us look at it."
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^^ meant in the context of Lucas is reading this right now; he's been googling his name all day and now has his script for next film.
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
okay so Mesa figured 'dis won't be bad, maybe some awkwardness and dependin' on how tis Mesa'll either keep goin' to der kitchen or wun back to mesa woom'
so ta course Mesa walk out derre and she's got her ass in der air while dis scrawny indie fop WEARING A TRUCKER HAT AND NOTHING ELSE is attemptin' to INSERT HIS COCK IN HER ASS. OH, NOOOOO!
ON MY COUCH
Mesa go out and dis sight actually caused mesa to go 'oh ugh god!' Mesa woommate tumbled out ta her awkward position onto der floor landin' on her shoulder and Trucker Hat fell to his side with a grunt. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! mesa woommate shrieked 'wha are yousa doin' home?!' and scampered into her woom, almost on all fours, past mesa. Way? Esqueeze mesa. she slammed der door behind her. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Trucker Hat gathered his pants and WAN INTO THE KITCHEN
ta course i followed him and he was sputterin' 'sorry dude sorry dude' and Mesa just said 'let mesa get mesa sandwich and yousa go clean up MY couch!' he agin said 'sorry sorry sorry' and wan out ta der kitchen and to der bedroom, he pounded on der door and asked to be let in, and mesa woommate let him in.
MESASA JAR-JAR BINKS! MY LIVING WOOM SMELLS LIKE NOTHING MESA'VE SMELLED BEFORE
― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, April 13, 2004 4:10 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
memory is fuzzy but was queen amygdala an elected queen with term limits? how do you go about electing royalty?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
probably in an election
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
I can totally see how an elected queen works -- it's just like any other elected position except you get special clothes and better stuff for your family
― nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elective_monarchyAlthough it's implied in II that everyone votes in the Naboo elections.
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
You also get to boink guys you used to babysit.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
fuckin gungans, they just vote for whoever promises more welfare
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
sure it wasn't decided through collecting utility data?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
queen amygdala--sounds like the queen of STD's. What is Amygdala anyway
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
in fairness, boinking the babysitter/babysittee just a universal perk of politics
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:18 PM (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
too true :(
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
(xxpost) Amidala - amygdala is a bit of yer brain
(xxxpost) But that would only work if they had utility data for each individual building, which they didn't because their application wouldn't allow it.
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
what I do best...
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
that's a 'shop
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
the crimes of Cowardly G. Soundgarden (342 new answers)
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
no I'm pretty sure it's a horse
why are the guys from Office Space beating a horse
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
because of the data thing
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
Definitely a 'shop. Ron Livingston originally had a golf club in the horse-beating scene.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
One thing that really bugs me in these movies is that they insist on putting every last line of Yoda's dialog into his screwed-up Yoda syntax. There's a scene in Attack of the Clones where Yoda is supposed to be commanding the Clone Army in the heat of battle and it's obvious that his garbled syntax makes snap decisions virtually impossible because it takes him 10 times as long as it should to give a simple order.
― Moodles, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
When The Phantom Menace first came out, there were lots of crazy people arguing that it was a better movie than the original because it had "real" actors like Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor rather than Mark Hammil and Carrie Fisher. These people were obviously smoking crack.
― Moodles, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
haha i didnt even know that was from office space. still havent seen!!
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
was this literally crazy people yelling things on street corners saying this?
xpost - WHAT?!
― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
do you think you could find anybody (outside of skywalker ranch) these days who will go to bat for these movies, specifically to argue that they are better than the originals? do this person exist?
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/120294/better_than_the_original_trilogy_the.html
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^ the article for which the word "challop" was invented
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
Nowhere in the original Star Wars trilogy is there any sequence of events nearly as profound in their application to real life as the manipulation of Palpatine as he orchestrates the separatist movement "headed" by Count Dooku, which allows him to go before the senate and ask for special "emergency powers" to deal with the growing threat facing the peace of the republic. Perhaps if America had embraced the prequel in the way they did the original Star Wars trilogy they would recognize the danger when an elected member of a representative republic asks for "emergency powers" to combat a threat.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
makes you think
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
Watching the Stars Wars prequel is like a lesson in civics
sounds fun
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 5:42 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
that's not even challop-quality, too earnest
i mean
Chances are you don't even remember these words of Darth Maul: "Fear is my ally."
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
He's written a number of things.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
There is no scarier scene in the entire Star Wars canon than the one that takes place in Attack of the Clones between Anakin and Amidala when they are having a discussion about the politics of the republic, and Anakin suggests that the system is broken and needs to be replaced with something where one person in charge has the power to enforce laws he feels is for the good of the people. To which Amidala replies, rightfully, that what Anakin is talking about sounds like a dictatorship. And then these all-too-familiar words from Anakin: "Well, if it works."
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
dont you see??? the iraq war is OUR fault. for NOT LOVING THE PREQUELS.
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
The Disappearance of Sunday Best and the Relaxation of Proper Church AttireWhat is acceptable to wear to church changed quite a bit over the last quarter of the 20th century.
The Effect of Crime Scene Investigation Technology on the Private Detective ShowWhat ever happened to the traditional detective show on TV? The crime scene investigation show killed it, that's what happened to the traditional detective show on TV.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
Class Warfare, Ideology, and the Ways in Which Rap and Country Music Are Identical EntitiesSome of the greatest music in pop history was forged by the rebelliousness engendered by class warfare; then there's rap and country music in which class distinction created the desire for assimilation into the capitalist ideology.
I'm not sure we have that individual data here.
― well I'm married to a limping, crescent-shaped abortion (sarahel), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
There is no scarier scene in the entire American canon than the one that takes place in between McCain and Palin when they are having a discussion about the politics of the republic, and Palin suggests that the system is broken and needs to be replaced with something where one person in charge has the power to enforce laws he feels is for the good of the people. To which McCain replies, rightfully, that what Palin is talking about sounds like a dictatorship. And then these all-too-familiar words from Joe The Plumber: "Well, if it works."
― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
What Do You Know About Weddings?Weddings are one of the oldest and longest-lasting rituals known to man. The joining of a man and a woman in matrimony is a rite of passage shared by civilizations across the planet.
Bio:Timothy Sexton was named AC's very first Content Producer of the Year. If you get the message on his home page here that he has published no content, understand it's a glitch: he's published 3500 pieces of content on AC alone.
Interests:Ticking off conservatives by revealing how facts disprove their ideological theories, revealing the complexities of movies that have been dismissed by clueless critics, The Simpsons, 80s alternative music
Motto:Eat the rich...but try to avoid the diarrhea that comes with eating something so vile.
Affiliations:Buy My Novel Bizarre Love TriangleBuy My Novel Antichrist, Superstar: The MusicalCedric Martin is a Crook
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
Titles that I Published This Week that You Probaby Weren't Notified OfI did not receive notification of most of these articles having been published so I assume most subscribes did not. I simply want to bring attention to the fact that I was published this week. Not a lot, but here are some you may have missed.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
With the Adoption of Preventive Detention Pres. Obama Becomes the New CheneyYes we can? Oh no, you didn't! Obama's acceptance of preventive detention means suspects can be jailed without evidence based on what they might do in the future. Is Obama really just Cheney in disguise?
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
Is the Catholic Church an Institution Too Silly to Be Engaged in Serious Discourse?Isn't it time to relegate the Catholic Church to the same peripheral status we give to Flat-Earthers and right-wing militias and neo-Nazi skinheads.
Yes, isn't it.
How to Quit Wasting Time and Start Making the Most of Your DayA little lesson in time efficiency.
On that note.
I have distinct memories of LOTS of people around me going to bat for these when they first came out (particularly I, but also III) but 10 minutes into Phantom Menace I basically became a completely unforgiving asshole about Lucas and his general horribleness and had a lot of arguments with various apologists.
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
The Effect of <something_you_like> on <something_you_hate>.What ever happened to the traditional <something_you_like>? The <something_you_hate> killed it, that's what happened to the traditional <something_you_like>.
― grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think a lot of people were in denial early on, kinda like everyone i was with at this midnight screening of 'the matrix reloaded'
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
i went to the matrix reloaded with like 12 of my friends and we all came out and before anyone said anyhting i was like well that was a huge piece of shit and then no one would talk to me for the rest of the night
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
theres a picture somewhere of me as a junior in high school with a bunch of other dudes outside a movie theater where theyre all giving a thumbs-up sign and im standing slight off from the group giving a thumbs-down
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
brand loyalty is a weird thing
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
I STILL stand by my claim that the series went to hell with Empire Strikes Back. They'll have my Star Wars original edition DVD-R sourced from LaserDisc when they pry it from my cold dead utility data.
I wasn't really ever bothered by moving Jabba, and only moderately bothered by Greedo shooting first. What bugged me the most was all the shit added to Mos Eisley. I loved it when it felt more like an empty and evil version of Barstow.
― Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
I did kinda like the production design and architecture of II and III. It was like all the Kelly Freas and Omni magazine covers brought to life.
― Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
that's an unusual claim... imho Empire's the best one, the only one that's really enjoyable start-to-finish.
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
Actually, I'm more bothered by all the extra shit added to THX 1138
― Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:52 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
^^this, except instead of having lots of arguments, I just quietly ended lifelong friendships and eventually moved out of the state completely.
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
I have a couple little nephews (8 and 10) who still get really upset whenever I am forced to admit how much I hate the prequels
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
That's...extreme.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
it was a pretty bad fuckin movie
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 5:58 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
i dont know about only one but it is weird to think EMPIRE of all things is where it went wrong... it's where the series went RIGHT!
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
Hey, Elvis - any chance of hooking a brother up?
― NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dude, yessssss! (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
it's ok for a kids movie. except all that stuff about trade disputes and campus data collection.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
I was exaggerating a little bit. (Although I do have two friends with whom I maintained only trivial contact after I moved out of state (for non-Star Wars related reasons) in part because their endless enthusiasm for the prequels, even after they came out and proved to be almost physically painful to endure, made me examine whether we were really all that compatible, friend-wise, or whether our friendship was mostly logistically driven.)
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
I don't give a shit about Star Wars, but I think George Lucas made a dumb cameo on The O.C. once.
― jaymc, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
guys reading this in the library was a fucking trial
― bentley cadence (gbx), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, for about a year after Episode I came out I was pretty insistent that it was a good movie, I wanted so much for it to be a good movie it took a while to admit that it wasn't.
― Detroit Metal City (Nicole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 22:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
It's good that we know each other now, then.
― she is writing about love (Jenny), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
Thing is if you read the first draft of the original star wars story it's terrible. Then he reworks it a bit and it's still terrible. Then I dunno he goes and reads The Hero with 1000 Faces or whatever and suddenly you've got this gem. And ok he sustains it for Empire but Jedi is pretty bad... so realistically what we're talking about here is not the betrayal of a lovable and long-lasting franchise, more the failure to repeat one or two flukes.
― last night i dreamt somebody shoved me (ledge), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
so realistically what we're talking about here is not the betrayal of a lovable and long-lasting franchise, more the failure to repeat one or two flukes.
very true - when you look at his overall career arc its pretty bad, there was nothing in it to suggest that these sequels were gonna be anything other than terrible. (Altho you have left out the anomaly of American Graffiti, which is pretty good.)
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
one of my bosses lives next to George Lucas and I have to continually bite my tongue whenever he's blathering on about something "cool" he heard about/talked about with/witnessed involving George
(oddly I do not have to bite my tongue at all with my ILM-employed bandmate, who, as an employee of Lucas's, is entirely cognizant of his failings)
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
Everyone has opinions exactly what is wrong with them and how they can be fixed but movie editing software is so cheap and easy to use now. I mean... have at it, guys!I await your results.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
the editing is the least of these movies' problems
*star wipe*
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
I've read off and on how enterprising nerds were able to excise Jar Jar and Jake completely and seamlessly from the series, and that sounded pretty impressive.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
I dunno if this is challops or just overfamiliarity with the cliches thanks to decades of teen comedies, but American Graffiti did pretty much nothing for me when I finally saw it a year ago.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
when you look at his overall career arc its pretty bad
As a writer-director-producer, yeah. As a film-technology guy, he's been immeasurably important, esp. in terms of sound design, sound editing and nonlinear film editing.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
Not that he invented any of that stuff himself, but he assembled the teams that made it happen.
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
I dunno...Diner makes AG look anemic.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
"film technology" guys should know better than to insist on being writer-directors.
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
(I haven't seen AG in at least 15 years, so its possible my memories of it are overly rosy)
No argument there! xp
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 23:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
i loved the '97 rereleases, but i was 11 years old at the time and still impressed by, like, final fantasy cut scenes
― mods did ✈ ▌▌ (cankles), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
How come every fucking scene in these movies involves someone standing in front of a window with a million fucking things happening in the background.― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:22 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:22 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
this made me legit lol btw
― mods did ✈ ▌▌ (cankles), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
still reading the thread so maybe this has been mentioned already but one thing in episode three that drove me nuts as much as anything in the prequels - was just talking w/my dude about this the other day actually - was when they had james earl jones talk in an american accent at the end of the movie, to match up w/fukkin hayden christinstinet's voice. goddamn that was some bullsquid.
i also never really 'got' why there were so many dang racialist stereotype aliens - obviously i'm not offended by them, but it's just mystifying, it's not like there was a precedent from the earlier movies???
― mods did ✈ ▌▌ (cankles), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
it depends on how you feels about the "jawas" (p.s. they did alderaan)
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
I bought the 2006 limited time re-releases merely cuz they contained hte original theatrical cuts (albeit in very low quality laserdisc transfer, but who gives a shiz).....
then I farted in Lucas' face
― III IV V (Bo Jackson Overdrive), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
one of the crazyfrustratin things about the prequels is how there's all these hints of badassery on the margins that's never delivered on - like fukkin temuera morrison as jengo fett, and the whole clone army of jake the musses, but it's never really as cool as it should be. the whole thing is just like.... unexploited opportunities. it's like if u were present at 9/11 and had ure handheld camera trained on the towers, and right before something happened (planes hitting, towers falling, people jumping) you train the camera away and zoom in on a cloud shaped like a giant pair of balls
― mods did ✈ ▌▌ (cankles), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
episode II is, i still maintain, one of the all-time great comedies though. the more 'human' lucas tries to make things - the more he tries to emulate human emotions with his cold steely robo brain - the more insane and embarassing shit gets. i saw it with a non-nerdy adult audience at a midnight showing, and as a collective experience it really drove home for me that it uh... i was just like, this HAS to be satire or something. the whole theater was losing its shit by the time we get to the shot of portman wearing a leather bustier and chilling out by a fireplace, it reminded me of vivian leigh in 'touch of evil' or something.... the whole romantic storyline, the holy-shit-are-you-shitting-me-ness of almost every scene (yoda fight), it fries my circuitry so much that i cant even articulate what im getting at so i'll just conclude by posting this:
[img]http://i25.tinypic.com/1z222dd.jpg/img]
― mods did ✈ ▌▌ (cankles), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yes, that is exactly what I thought. Imagine if you'd been on the plane with your camera.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
I remember reading something about prequels somewhere which basically summed up why they were bad with the line, "Oh, Gandalf, kiss me again."
― Great Expectorations (James Morrison), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
lol i saw ep II at the mann's chinese theater in hollywood on a massive screen with a packed house that could not stop losing its shit over every serious scene.
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
When I saw ep 2 the guy next to me yelled out "HEY LOOK ITS SHREK" every time a CGI character appeared on screen.
― prosciutto-wrapped Hot Pocket (los blue jeans), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
otm. My buddies and I treated it like Mystery Science Theater shit.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
― http://tinyurl.com/lrhdut (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
something that hasn't been mentioned: Jar Jar Binks casting the vote that grants complete power to the Emperor.
― Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
It's funny to read the Jedi hate/disappointment cause I loved that movie so much when I when I was a kid. I was a month shy of my 9th birthday when it came out and I knew it was going to be coming out for ages before, back when it was going to be called Revenge of the Jedi so I was super excited and looking forward to it. I didn't even hate the Ewoks.
In retrospect yeah it's not as good as Empire but it was so mind-blowingly great when I first saw it that it's hard to dislike it too much even now.
― joygoat, Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
Jedi has lots of awesome shit in it. Great space battle stuff, the vader-luke lightsaber fight is cool. The first 30 minutes are just plain awesome with Jabba, the Rancor etc.
My main problem with the Ewoks was just the ridiculousness of them defeating the stormtroopers in hand to hand combat. The part where the ewoks and han surprise the stormtroopers on top of the building is just insane and really takes me out of the movie.
― Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
Ewoks = VC ?
― Great Scott! It's Molecular Man. (Ste), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
They should have done more VC-style boobytrapping, instead of felling stormptroopers with twig-sized arrows.
― Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
haha yeah
― Great Scott! It's Molecular Man. (Ste), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 9:47 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
you may be the only living human being who remembers that detail
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 03:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
it was so mind-blowingly great when I first saw it that it's hard to dislike it too much even now.
see I wonder how much this effect will be in play for those who were kids when the prequels come out - or if they will, over time, grow to hate acknowledge them as crap.
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
I remembered that Jar-Jar cast the vote that granted complete power to the Emperor and that's really the only reason I can stand the Jar-Jar character at all.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
are going to have a thread next week called the trial of george lucas
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
No, but I'd imagine we'd have some fun with "the execution of george lucas"
― the sideburns are album-specific (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
"They should have done more VC-style boobytrapping, instead of felling stormptroopers with twig-sized arrows."
If Lucas has ruined with his CG knives, why in principle can't we make it more awesome by tastefully splicing in footage from Full Metal Jacket like you suggest?
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
More ewok tunnels, pitfalls with spikes, and teddy bears punching bound storm troopers in the kidneys while shouting "Didi Mao".
― http://tinyurl.com/lrhdut (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 16 July 2009 16:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Mr. Que, Thursday, July 16, 2009 11:47 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
that's basically the plan but i hadn't come up wiht a name yet so thank u q
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
Nominating Shakey Mo as stenographer
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
basically all the imperial ground troops were felled because some muppets threw a bunch of small rocks at them
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
I still think that:
- aside from Jar-Jar and Anakin, Episode I is good- aside from Hayden Christensen, Episode II is good- aside from Hayden Christensen, Episode III is good
I do recognize that a trilogy where the worst, most detestable (in execution, not plotwise) actor/character is the main focus of the story is problematic but it's also par for the course with the Star Wars movies; if anything, the problem with the prequels is that there is no comparable synergy to the Harrison Ford/Carrie Fisher sparks to get you to ignore how awful the plot and most of the acting is. Had they cast a love interest for Ewan (besides Hayden Christensen), conventional wisdom on these movies would be completely different.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:24 (3 years ago) Permalink
a love interest for Ewan (besides Hayden Christensen)
bahahahaha
― kind-hearted, sensitive keytar player (Abbott), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think the big problem with this trilogy isn't storywise but execution-wise. there was a sort of looseness to the OG trilogy that the new ones are missing. a lot of the serious shit and the mystical bullshit was around the margins plus it had a character or two built in to call bullshit on it and to suggest that the FORCE wasn't always the answer (cf han solo showing up at the end of ep IV).
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
part of me cannot believe i actually typed that, or typed everything else i've written on this thread
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
conventional wisdom on these movies would be completely different.
Maybe so, but I definitely would still hate them.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
GIS searching for 'obi wan anakin love' leads to odd results.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
we could argue all day about what were the specific problems w/ the prequels, & ultimately i think the answer is basically just that they were shitty movies with shitty actors written and directed by a chinless goofball
that being said imo the biggest gap btw 4/5/6 and 1/2/3 is that 4/5/6 were pretty FUNNY, like basically every main good guy except luke and obi wan is comic relief and han/leia/3p0 are actually pretty hilar, and in an actual non-slapstick adult humor kind of way, where as 1/2/3's humor is derived basically from unfunny racist cgi aliens
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
occasionally a robot will fall over!
― To me real-life abortion is far better than video games with ideals. (goole), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
what a disaster for robotry
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
the problems with the prequels are all about execution--from story to script, as a director of actors, and in creating images that people might actually want to look at. max is also otm the prequels were heavily juvenilized and their tone is pretty much totally divorced from the originals.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah basically han solo taking the piss out of everything was essential to the first 3 films and tbh his character's arc was by far the most interesting, but then it dead-ended when he got frozen and apparently lost his ability to do anything other than lead midget furries around a forest
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
I would like to offer my services for the upcoming trial. I am unsure as to how I can best be of service, but I have legal training.
― NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dude, yessssss! (B.L.A.M.), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think i knew the prequels were gonna be shit when the very first trailer for ep I showed a thrilling shot of boring-looking robots cresting a grassy ridge
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think i knew the prequels were gonna be shit as soon as that crazy galactic senate trade shit started scrolling across the screen and then the racist cgi aliens showed up
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
I didn't mind them running with the idea that the mystical Force is always the answer in the prequels, given when they happen in the story and who the main characters are; it would have been odd to have a skeptic running up and going "oh come on, that mumbo-jumbo that btw is the main peacekeeping force of the galactic gvt and flexes its muscle regularly on dissidents is just a pile of handewavey crap" given the prevalence of the Jedi in the life of the Republic. I do kind of mind that they cast a total knob as Anakin in all three movies and then didn't minimize his dialogue or have much cooler characters do all of his heavy-lifting for him. There was a real lack of coherence in the prequel trilogy that isn't there in the originals; you have the good guys (Rebels with Han assist) and you have the bad guys (Vader and the Empire) and they are basically constant throughout all three movies; not having those distinct sides probably made the threat too diffuse (Palpatine and his one follower doesn't generate the same level of threat to the viewer and all of the Republic separatists were too disconnected and uncoordinated to come across as a credible threat).
Plus Anakin was a tool.
And yet, I still like these movies.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
"the prequels were heavily juvenilized"
Huh? But these have always been movies about lazer swords and pew pew pew!There's some argument somewhere justifying adult criticism of children's books that I used to accept but now, not so sure. Please help reaffirm my faith that old folk have any business critquing movies like SW, other than normal parental concerns like it'll rot their brains and turn them into space-republicans.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
but then it dead-ended when he got frozen and apparently lost his ability to do anything other than lead midget furries around a forest
have u ever been frozen and used as interior decoration? that's some traumatic shit.
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
simply not making eps 1-3 story and characters good/interesting/fun enough
― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
as max pointed out the humor in 1-3 (or at least 1 and 2 as i never saw 3) is more juvenile and slapsticky, one of the main characters in 1 is a child, another could not possibly be enjoyed by anyone who is not a child.
there is nothing about 4 and 5 that says "this is for kids" to me, laser swords incl.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
this is a real lego
― kind-hearted, sensitive keytar player (Abbott), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
I think it's funny that 4-6 have simplistic kiddie plotting with adultish performances and 1-3 have overcomplicated adult plotting with kiddie performances.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
the idea that obi-wan having a girlfriend could have saved these movies is jedi-master-level wishful thinking
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
the point being that the original 3 are just as crappy and the thing that saves them is two good actors with good chemistry doing a conflicted love story and how there's no parallel with the one good actor who gets a significant amount of screentime in the prequels
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
"the originals sucked too" argument does not fly with me.
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
if i was going to write a list of "things that saved the first three star wars movies," "han and leias romance" (which takes up like what maybe 15 minutes of screen time across the trilogy??) would be a lot lower than say "light sabers" and "golden gay robot"
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, July 16, 2009 1:16 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark
haa i was about to make this point. or, more to the point, hating the prequels has led me to basically hating the whole star wars industry complex thing outright.
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
I guess you could throw "more concerted efforts to kill the annoying lead character" in there, too
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
alec guinness, worlds that seem real and lived-in rather than CGI, mysteries hinted at rather than spelled out (the point upthread about the clone wars just being hinted at and sounding all the more epic for being a tossed-off mention vs the actual depiction of the clone wars is a good one)
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
the overall tone of the two sets of movies is just totally, completely different imo.
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
i would say the major difference between the two sets of films is that the originals are awesome fun lighthearted but just serious enough imaginative epics that everyone loves and the new ones are boring pompous racist shitstains that every hates.
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
― DavidM, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
also the originals were creating a mythology and backstory out of necessity as they went while the prequels felt, for whatever reason, totally burdened by that mythology and backstory (which led to retarded shit like young anakin meeting r2d2).
― north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
I do admit it's kind of funny how R2D2 and C-3P0 spend all of that time with Luke and never once mention that they knew his father.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
didnt threeps have his memory wiped?
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
i actually thought the idea of them being continuing characters throughout the whole jammy was kind of a cool idea, like the series was ultimately about THEM... too bad that stuff sucked
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
wouldn't it be awesome to have prequel prequels, where we find out how 3PO and R2D2 met
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
it's like everything that should not have been linked up between the two series was, and everything that needed to be was not
― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:02 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
I just want to reiterate that I agree with almost every criticism in this thread except for the racism accusations but I still like the prequels.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
we are not going to stop until we have ilx-approved treatments for a different set of prequels aren't we
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
maybe we can get dan lacey to storyboard for us
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
I once asked something along these lines in a thread about the prequels, basically wondering how if like everyone from the original 3 was somehow passing through the new ones, not even any of the robots were like "hey, you know what's funny is, umm, so I met your dad once?" -- There was a long strand-weaving explanation about memory-wiping and coincidence that was easier to just accept than actually think about
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
to wikipedia!
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
However, C-3PO becomes a witness to his maker's turn to the dark side of the Force when he accompanies Padmé to Mustafar and Anakin, now the Sith Lord Darth Vader, uses the Force to choke her into unconsciousness. When Obi-Wan's duel with Vader moves to the interior of the facility on Mustafar, C-3PO and R2-D2 take it upon themselves to get the injured Senator aboard her cruiser. When Obi-Wan returns to the ship, C-3PO pilots it to the asteroid facility of Polis Massa and witnesses Padmé give birth to the Skywalker twins, Luke and Leia, and die shortly afterward. C-3PO and R2-D2 fall into the custody of Bail Organa, who orders that C-3PO's memories be wiped on the Tantive IV in order to protect the twins from Palpatine and Vader, and the Empire that has taken over the galaxy.[6]
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
I've met a fair number of people who have worked with George Lucas at LucasFilm or ILM, and let's just say that they never have anything positive to say about him.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh yeah i forgot that anakin MADE c-3p0 which is just the height of what a less cultured man than myself might call gaywaddery
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
Especially if they study the kinds of shoes Lucas tends to wear.
xpost
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
i would like a cut of the prequels with all the sound effects retained but pretty much all of the dialogue muted. that is the kind of technology Lucas should've concentrated on after THX (esp. as he said himself he wanted kids to understand what was going on in the films without having to rely on the dialogue, not that that explains it's general poorness).
― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
(keep the music too yes)
― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
i would like a cut of the prequels with all the sound effects retained but pretty much all of the dialogue muted
Half the complaints about Jar Jar and other aliens in the movie would have been taken care of if they'd gone the route with Greedo, Jabba, etc. in the originals and had them speak in Ben Burtt-invented languages with appropriate subtitles, I figure.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
I liked the conceit of two lowliest characters being the true heroes of the series, and I wish Lucas had made them more self-serving and avaricious like in Hidden Fortress. It would have been neat for the prequels to see them in the employ of Palpatine, then defecting to rebels after some bumbling infraction makes them fear for their lives. Along the way R2 can spot the plans for the Death Star and swipe them hoping for riches on the black market. C3P0 catches him and demands a 60/40 cut and amusing bot slapping ensues.
Hey let's play game -- 70s trilogy or 90s trilogy?
'The loudness, the smash-and-grab editing, the relentless pacing drive every idea from your head; for young audiences “Star Wars” is like getting a box of Cracker Jack which is all prizes.'
'Lucas has got the tone of bad movies down pat: you never catch the actors deliberately acting badly, they just seem to be bad actors'
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
Ben Burtt invented Swahili?
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
I was thinking more Huttese.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
Burtt also invented Urdu.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 18:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
that is the kind of technology Lucas should've concentrated on after THX (esp. as he said himself he wanted kids to understand what was going on in the films without having to rely on the dialogue, not that that explains it's general poorness).― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, July 16, 2009 2:47 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark
― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, July 16, 2009 2:47 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark
am i crazy or do i not remember lucas talking about how he wanted the prequels to effectively be silent movies, which is why the dialogue is so artless and perfunctory i guess
kael quote, so that's the original trilogy imo
― cankles, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
Kael actually loved The Empire Strikes Back, disliked SW, and despised the one with the Ewoks.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
I've met a fair number of people who have worked with George Lucas at LucasFilm or ILM
I think most everyone here works on ILM! Or at least contributes.
― kind-hearted, sensitive keytar player (Abbott), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
xp 'loved' Empire seems like a stretch, but she rightfully pointed out that it was the most imaginative and artfully made of the movies
― cankles, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
there's no star wars poll? like which one of the three is the best? it's #2, right?
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
of course it's V
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
a Star Wars poll would just force us to do our routines one more time.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
Do you know what, I say "use your HATRED Anakin" all the time. the Viceroy picked up one of those kids picture books that has 10 buttons that make noise and did a PERFECT job recreating III with it. "Use your HATRED Anakin" "I must return to Naboo" "volcano sounds" "I must return to Naboo"
― kind-hearted, sensitive keytar player (Abbott), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
and "NOOOOOO"
nah-we'd be talking about highlights rather than talking about what makes the new ones suck balls
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
I wouldn't hold your breath there...
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh right--sorry forgot the crazy number scheme
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, July 16, 2009 1:49 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark
yeah none of that happens in the prequels does it?! that stuff was so cool. how does a man get so much lest trusting of his audience as he gets older...
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
A poll of our least favorite bit of Lucas dialogue would be sweet, though.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
there's probably more than fifty chunks of bad dialog though
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
like i'm trying to think of GOOD dialog
some of chewbacca's musings, certainly
flububu
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
The theatrical rescreening of the original trilogy was a revelation in how blatantly awful Luke was. I was rooting for him to get eaten in the ice cave.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
he's our cocky flyboy
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
I liked that one song the cantina band played
― cool app (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
I think any "great dialog" poll is going to be all Han, Leia and Vader with a couple of Lando quotes thrown
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:17 (3 years ago) Permalink
laugh it up fuzzball
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
tbh the only actor who manages to pull off his dialogue 100% convincingly throughout the entire series is alec guinness
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
which is a miracle if you actually read what he says, rather than listen to him say it
but then again guinness wasn't necessarily reliant upon having a decent director, the dude sleepwalked through that role beautifully
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
It's weird to roll one's eyes and laugh out loud at the same time.
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
how does a man get so much lest trusting of his audience as he gets older...
my guess = did not originally quite conceive of his product as being "for children," was gradually convinced that it was, then later put awkward position of trying to make product that was both "for children" AND "for adult geeks"
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
interesting theory but mine is that he is a sociopath
― goole, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
hahaha
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
I think if someone finds an animated GIF of a beardo fucking a gigantic pile of money, you will have a more accurate representation of what was going through Lucas's head
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
beardo shot first!
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
I mean I think of the difference between Star Wars and Ewoks really being the drift from "I am making a sort of B-movie sci-fi fun-action epic" to "I am also part of a newish genre of fantastical entertainment children enjoy, so something should be small and fuzzy"
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
animated GIF of an Ewok fucking a pile of C3PO
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
also what is the difference between these two things, really? weren't B movies like designed for kids, originally for Saturday afternoons at the Bijou?
I am making a sort of B-movie sci-fi fun-action epic" to "I am also part of a newish genre of fantastical entertainment children enjoy,
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
You know, they could have played the Ewoks exactly as they did and no one would have complained if they'd added scenes with them eating the fallen Stormtrooper clones.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh man cannibal Ewoks would be golden
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
i don't think it's cannibalism if ewoks eat humans. just dinner.
― Ømår Littel (Jordan), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
I mean I think of the difference between Star Wars and Ewoks really being the drift from "I want to impress and show up my buddies Steven and Francis" to "I rule and want to make more and more shitloads of money and who cares what anybody thinks"
― nabisco, Thursday, July 16, 2009 3:32 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― saddam hoosteen (s1ocki), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://evilewoks.ytmnd.com/
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
now imagine them passing around fingers and munching on them in the midst of this
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
they already have the heads near the beginning of the song, just take that next step and have the human allies kind of afraid of them
― mark cl, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
La-de-da-de-dahKILL THEMLa-de-da-de-dahEAT NOWEAT THE HUMAN SCUMEAT THE HUMAN SCUMMMMMMM!
"Directed by DAVID LYNCH"
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
i love those fuzzy bastards
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
btw listening to this over and over will make you slightly crazy
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
Episode VIIThreat of the Ewoks
It is a period of fuzzy bastards...
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
It's striking how these movies have bad-ass themes like the main theme and the Imperial theme... and they also have "Yub Nub".
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
CANNIBALS
At three a.m. he can’t take it anymore.
"Jedi?" he says loudly into the darkness.
"Hnnnh...wha?" says the archaeologist next to him, jerking alert from a deep sleep.
"I can't believe Jedi was your favorite," Jack says, feeling his balled-up jacket under his cheek as he turns his head to look at Daniel.
Daniel groans and rolls over, pressing his face against Sam's shoulder and pulling his own jacket over his head. "Make him stop, Sam."
"Even Teal'c thinks it's lame," Jack says.
"Indeed," Teal'c's voice echoes from the corner of their cell, where he sits attempting kel'no'reem. "The use of a second Death Star was derivative at best, although a number of the action sequences were quite entertaining."
"Oh, come on," Sam says, sounding a little muzzy. "The Ewoks were adorable."
Daniel mumbles something Jack can't hear, between the sound-absorbing quality of Sam's shoulder and the balled-up jacket Daniel still holds over one ear. "What was that, o tasteless one?"
"The Ewoks were cannibals!" Daniel says, sitting up suddenly and throwing his jacket at Jack. "When Luke, Han, and Chewbacca are taken prisoner by the Ewoks, you can see a skinned Ewok being roasted on a spit over a fire in the background. The Ewoks are the perfect example of a race that is underestimated and assumed to be ethical merely because they're cute, when all evidence shown suggests they engage in tribal warfare and devour their enemies."
"Cannibals? Daniel, they're like little teddy bears!" Carter says, aghast.
"Daniel Jackson, I believe you may be right." Teal'c sounds surprised. "I will view that film with a new perspective."
"Yeah, if the Pygmies of Planet Propaganda ever let us out. I think Daniel was making a little reference to our situation here."
"I said there was something fishy. You thought they were cute," Daniel scowls, flopping back onto the floor.
There's a moment of silence in the cell. Just when Daniel thinks he might get some sleep, Jack says, "So, if this is Jedi, do I get to be Han?"
"I am not Princess Leia!" Sam says, seeing immediately where this is going.
"You know, Teal'c, you'd make a great Lando."
Daniel swears he can hear Teal'c's eyebrow raise. He lets out a little sob, rolls onto his side, and prays for unconsciousness.
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
that's true, they're not entirely dissimilar, but I do think there are some small formal differences between making a "fun" sci-fi/action movie and a fantasy thing that's aimed at kids -- or at least at this point I think those tend to be two strains that have to be balanced out in movies that do both (like, say, Spiderman movies, or the way the Harry Potter movies have hoped to move from one toward the other) ... I guess you could also put it in terms of demographics, like whether you're skewing toward 15-year-olds or 10-year-olds, or questions like that.
certainly there was stuff at the time that was totally both (Superman movies, for instance), but part of what I mean, really, is that ... wasn't it sort of during the course of the original trilogy that the idea of "high-budget, non-animated, fantastical movie aimed at kids" kinda firmed up and became more of a thing? like kind of a boom around, say, E.T. or The Dark Crystal or whatever? which somehow accounts in my head for the tone of Return of the Jedi versus the two before it.
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
wasn't it sort of during the course of the original trilogy that the idea of "high-budget, non-animated, fantastical movie aimed at kids" kinda firmed up and became more of a thing? like kind of a boom around, say, E.T. or The Dark Crystal or whatever?
Definitely a demi-trend. The Neverending Story would count too.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
like even in terms of money and popularity, surely it seemed more like you could sell a shitload of Ewok merchandise in 1984 than it would have in 1977
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
Didn't this whole merchandising boom happen BECAUSE of the original trilogy?
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
I mean, think about how many Star Wars toys were put out there before the Ewoks even showed up.
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
probably in large part, yes! but that's what I mean about the guy possibly following his own success out in that direction and being like "hell yeah, if that's working, let's put teddy bears in the last one"
(note: I like Ewoks fine, I'm just saying)
― nabisco, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think that has to do with the ewoks being cute and cuddly and more appealing to the masses--i knew someone who claimed that the ewoks were invented just so lucas could make $$$ selling teddy bears. star wars toys were insanely popular straight out of the gate.
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
What the hell:
Ewok Festival of Love is an event. Ewoks are small creatures that are native to the forest moon of Endor. The trees of the forest provide not only physical shelter to the Ewoks, but also give the tribe a sense of protection as the trees watch over them.The Ewoks live in harmony with nature and forage for food in the lush vegetation. Camby berries are given freely during the Festival of Love, celebrated once a year to honor the kinship and love between tribe members. During the festival, the Ewoks present this gift of their hard-earned food to other members of the tribe to demonstrate trust and acceptance.As the Ewoks celebrate the Festival of Love, tribe members prepare meals, dance, and sing traditional songs, such as this ancestral chant often heard drifting through the treetops of the forest moon: Dugun duca lula ludia nuna, dounga, luna nudia!
The Ewoks live in harmony with nature and forage for food in the lush vegetation. Camby berries are given freely during the Festival of Love, celebrated once a year to honor the kinship and love between tribe members. During the festival, the Ewoks present this gift of their hard-earned food to other members of the tribe to demonstrate trust and acceptance.
As the Ewoks celebrate the Festival of Love, tribe members prepare meals, dance, and sing traditional songs, such as this ancestral chant often heard drifting through the treetops of the forest moon: Dugun duca lula ludia nuna, dounga, luna nudia!
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
i mean INSANELY popular
goddamn you Ned.
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://www.starwarstoymuseum.com/star_wars_toys.html
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
luna nudia
you have ruined my entire life
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
Uh:
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
Behind the scenes!
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
okay PHEW that was a Star Wars Galaxies thing and not a real life thing
nude Star Wars fans yub nubbing under the pale moonlight was going to give me night terrors
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
This is some sort of furry/Star Wars crossover, isn't it.
― Detroit Metal City (Nicole), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
The 'guest star' in the video seems only appropriate.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
furry/sw/ilx crossover
― "he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
Title: Ewok Murder Rampage: A Hero Emerges
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
you know, the Ewok thing would be better if Billy Dee did the whole thing as opposed to the a capella reject
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
my new favorite band
Yes.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
Cinematic glory.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
why the fuck did I read that Ewok story, there was no way it could be better than "Ewok Murder Rampage"
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
'Some warriors believe that eating a beast transfers it's soul into you. That would explain the contented joy one feels after consuming a fresh, well-barbecued Ewok'
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
1 package Boba Fett's Ass-terburner Hot Spice ™ (optional)
No.
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
ARGH:
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
that soap looks... used
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
that soap makes you smell like an ewok
― Mr. Que, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
Flashing back a few months.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
mmmm... chocolate-y soap
― kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
Oh good grief:
Posted by Andrew Zilch on April 30, 2009 at 7:52 pmHaving fought for the fair treatment of Ewoks with my "Ewok Gospel" video, I am deeply hurt by Mr. Colbert's recent anti-Ewok hate crime.As a result, I just posted an open letter to Mr. Colbert on my site — andrewzilch.com. Please help me bring this monster to justice.Yub-nub!!
Having fought for the fair treatment of Ewoks with my "Ewok Gospel" video, I am deeply hurt by Mr. Colbert's recent anti-Ewok hate crime.
As a result, I just posted an open letter to Mr. Colbert on my site — andrewzilch.com. Please help me bring this monster to justice.
Yub-nub!!
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
mdk
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
― DavidM, Thursday, 16 July 2009 22:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
not to be captain-save-a-neck, but here's a riff-in-progress on what makes 77 Star Wars so great: http://www.mstrmnd.com/log/1241
Same guy also did an excellent shot-by-shot analysis of The Shining: http://mstrmnd.com/log/802
― Fox Force Five Punchline (sexyDancer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 22:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
Good analysis, if though a bit everything-and-the-kitchen-sink. I suppose that my problem with everything after 1977 Star Wars is that Lucas saw it as a green light to load up future movies with even more half-assed remembrances of The Hero with a Thousand Faces.
I suppose it's time to link to David Brin's "Star Wars despots" article again: http://www.salon.com/ent/movies/feature/1999/06/15/brin_main/
― Elvis Telecom, Thursday, 16 July 2009 23:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
I don't see why we must make a case for Star Wars' greatness to consider it worth watching. It's a pretty good movie, sometimes very exciting, often much worse than that, about which it's impossible for a certain generation (mine) to remain objective.
― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 23:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
I actually own this book, in which Brin figures heavily:
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 16 July 2009 23:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
It didn't hold up so well the last time I saw it, but I still maintain that The Last Starfighter is better than the original Star Wars. Like Quiznos is better than Subway.
― Philip Nunez, Friday, 17 July 2009 01:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah--it's fun, exciting, often clever, pretty charming, has an ace villain, and I (along with millions of others) watched it at just the right age.
― Great Expectorations (James Morrison), Friday, 17 July 2009 01:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://www.scifitv.com.au/Blog/2009/07/jake-lloyd-exclusive-ten-years-after-ep-one/
― Attack Attack! and Philosophy (latebloomer), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 21:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
it seems like the unrelenting awfulness of Episode I turned him into a pretty cool guy.
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 22 July 2009 21:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
haha ya!
that's kinda nice.
― katherine NAGL (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
woah he seems a bit bitter about high school and college. and the rocking back and forth is weird.
― Aqua Teen Cunga Force (blueski), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
you're reading too much into it.
― katherine NAGL (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
I just saw Crystal Skull on Bluray and that shit is almost as bad as Episode I. I couldn't fucking believe it.
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
you gotta watch it on regular DVD
― katherine NAGL (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
cgi gophers don't really hold up well in hd
― Panera - Vulgar Display Of Flour (latebloomer), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
it really comes into its own on telesync avi
― Aqua Teen Cunga Force (blueski), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
It actually might be better on VHS because the plasticity of the Skull wouldn't come through so much.
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
remember guys, if the biggest gripes are about how unrealistic the effects look that's not actually bad going
― Aqua Teen Cunga Force (blueski), Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
the effects are probably the only fun thing in the movie. My only positive memory of the movie is that the Mushroom Cloud looked cool.
― Matt Armstrong, Wednesday, 22 July 2009 22:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
"it really comes into its own on telesync avi"You are probably joking but you are very right!
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 July 2009 23:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
never did make that poll
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Monday, 16 November 2009 22:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
― I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 3:45 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― max, Monday, 16 November 2009 23:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
:D
― fel (latebloomer), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
actual LOLs re-reading this. i still dont know why it was so funny... something about shakey's personality just made it extra-rofly
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:49 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
^ best moment
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
This thread would make my poll of best ILE threads.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
I can't reread this right now (lol ZING) but I remember getting shushed in the library at the time
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
This thread is amazing. Did you guys realise that he made changes to the movies *before* the 1990s?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_changes_in_Star_Wars_re-releases:
# On Hoth, right after C-3PO tells R2 to "Switch off", R2 gives out a little "blurp".# When Luke finally collapses in the snow, he lets out a grunt as he lands on his face.# Han says "until I can get the shelter up" instead of "until I can get the shelter built."# Luke says an additional "Ben... Dagobah..." just before Han says, "and I thought they smelled bad on the outside."# When C-3PO tells Luke "It's so good to see you fully functional again", Luke replies, "Thanks, 3PO.
and so on and so on and so on...
This is all for the '70mm' edition whatever the hell that is/was. So basically he'd been tinkering with them since they first came out!
― piscesx, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 00:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
Wasn't 'Episode IV' only added to the opening crawl in later prints of the initial run?
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 01:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
― Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:59 (4 months ago)
i think the only really bad thing here was the monkey shell-dweller dudes.
― LaMonte, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 01:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
Half the complaints about Jar Jar and other aliens in the movie would have been taken care of if they'd gone the route with Greedo, Jabba, etc. in the originals and had them speak in Ben Burtt-invented languages with appropriate subtitles, I figure.― Ned Raggett, Thursday, July 16, 2009 2:49 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, July 16, 2009 2:49 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark
OTM. I can clearly remember on opening day for Episode 1 having those two green aliens in the beginning talking to each other using silly voices instead of made up languages with subtitles and having a very bad feeling about where the rest of the film was going...
― Adam Bruneau, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 01:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
No-one has mentioned the part where Obi-Wan jumps on the back of a space lizard in Episode 3 and the movie fulfills its threat to become a videogame cut scene.
# Han says "until I can get the shelter up" instead of "until I can get the shelter built."
Clearly a change that needed to be made.
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 08:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
My "fuck they made it into a videogame" moment was in ep 2, R2 flying around the robot construction place trying to save 3PO. Or whatever, but fuck if I'm watching it again to refresh my memory.
― George Mucus (ledge), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 12:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
It is that bad. In the same scene Padme is on a conveyor belt and has to duck under a series of Thwomps, and I thought "this is Mario except everything's rusty"
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 12:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
that being said imo the biggest gap btw 4/5/6 and 1/2/3 is that 4/5/6 were pretty FUNNY, like basically every main good guy except luke and obi wan is comic relief and han/leia/3p0 are actually pretty hilar, and in an actual non-slapstick adult humor kind of way, where as 1/2/3's humor is derived basically from unfunny racist cgi aliens― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 16 July 2009 13:34 Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 16 July 2009 13:34 Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
This is really, really true.
In general there's a crucial loss of instincts about what would actually be ENTERTAINING in a movie like this, which were really strong in the first three films. Setting aside Empire, which brings some (well-done) heaviness, the OG trilogy are just damn FUN, raggedy, cowboy fun, not forced amusement-park pod-racing fun.
The trilogy also screws itself by being a story about people on the top (Jedi) who very, veryyyyyyyy slowly realize there's a needlessly elaborate and dull conspiracy to unseat them. As an arc, you can look at that from a distance and see a story there, but minute by minute it doesn't really generate much tension. Whereas in the first movies, our heroes are always ON THE RUN from a threat that's way bigger than them - I mean even from that shot of Leia's ship with the GIANT FUCKING STAR DESTROYER bearing down on it - you know who to sympathize with from the get-go, and that underdog thing never really lets up. They're a scruffy, unlikely bunch of misfits going up against the whole Empire, sneaking around, wearing disguises, riding a beat-up old ship and teaming up with anybody they can find who's with them. It's just more satisfying than Jedi dithering over the necessary 2/3 vote to override a veto, or whatever.
Assuming the prequels HAD to be made, which clearly they didn't because everybody was fine without them, it seems like it would have made sense to follow the first movies' success - screw the details about how the Empire comes to exist and just tell me a fun story for chrissakes. I'm not sure what that story would be but this wasn't it. I've been plowing through Stephen King's Dark Tower series lately, and there's some interesting parallels. Overall the series is pure candy, a light romp through various genres/archetypes, a motley team up against unstoppable evil, all of that. Our heroes are led by Roland the Gunslinger, a Clint Eastwood type who is also the last of a bygone era when his kind policed and protected the world from evil, while going on a lot about a vague universal power that guides their destiny (ie, they were Jedi Knights). There was a long gap in publication after the first three, and the next to come out was basically a prequel book, with most of its page count given over to an extended flashback to those bygone days when Roland was just one of many gunslingers and the world looked to them for protection.
The difference between Dark Tower IV and "The Phantom Menace" is that Stephen King (another awkward-looking nerd who came to power in the 70s on the back of THRILL POWERED entertainment fiction) can be bothered to make the flashback story actually interesting. He doesn't try to tell us the entire saga of Roland's life, he just zooms in on a pivotal mission he went on in his youth, a mission on which everything changed, he became a man, first fell in love, etc, etc. And while we've gone back to the time when the gunslingers were generally still a force to be reckoned with, Roland in particular is still a fresh-faced youth, capable of making mistakes he doesn't make in the present.
I would bet money that George Lucas read this book somewhere in the process of generating the new films (book came out in '97) but he missed the point. We should have gotten flawed, screwup Jedi getting in over their heads, maybe gradually getting their shit together but realizing too late the evil that they've stirred up and how long the odds against them are. A lot of those elements were floating around the edges of the prequels but they were swamped by unthrilling action sequences, an uninvolving conspiracy plot, and high-school drama club acting in the central character. And what the hell was Obi-Wan's character arc?
haha, I really need to stop, this is turning into like every internet post about the prequels ever
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 15:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
I'm not sure what that story would be but this wasn't it.
Shoulda followed Anakin much more closely from the start, as a wild, talented kid from a bad background trying to prove his mettle in the haughty, rarefied world of the Jedi. I would've had him as a tough street kid. That would've had much more dramatic potential than some brat plucked out of nowhere because Obi Wan recognised his magic powers.
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
ps if anyone finds my post horrifyingly nerdy let me remind you that many Bothans died to obtain that individual building data from the campus
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
I can sorta imagine this street-tough Anakin movie - - - but given how lousy the actual Anakin turned out to be I'm hesitant. My gut says the movies should have been more about Obi-Wan, or at least really told from his perspective.
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:10 (3 years ago) Permalink
I've just been thinking about it a bit more, and actually I would've had the entire first movie being about Anarkin's efforts to become a Jedi, with no mention of the Sith or Trade Federations at all till Episode II.
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
The story might have been tolerable without all the awful slapstick and tomfoolery, of which Jar Jar was the main culprit but he wasn't alone - e.g. Anakin destroying the space station by pure chance in ep 1. The originals may or may not have been kids films but either way they succeeded without any of that absolute cringeworthy nonsense. RotJ excepted.
― George Mucus (ledge), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:14 (3 years ago) Permalink
padme character should have been a lady jedi instead of just a blank love interest
they should have been rivals/love interests
and like i said upthread obi-wan basically should have been han solo
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
Could be good actually - - or maybe Obi-Wan is a kind of promising but distractable and doubting Jedi, with a girlfriend and a "real life" that makes him doubt in the power of the Force until it's too late to save his buddy from the Dark Side, or something like that. Anyway, the doubting/cynical aspect of Han could have done some good in these movies and it would be interesting if Anakin is actually the MORE promising Jedi, not just in terms of his midichlorians and lifting-up-boxes abilities but in his actual faith in the system.
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
It would've been good to have some sense that the Jedi were on the wain and maybe becoming corrupt and too powerful, rather than being the morally perfect supermen they're presented as - so that the whole Empire debacle was kind of needed as a reset button, so the Jedi could go back to their original purpose. That would make sense of the 'balance to the force' prophecy, which is never really explained.
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, November 17, 2009 10:04 AM (31 minutes ago) Bookmark
^^ this fits with my sad dream of eps 1-3 as a political story about the rise of a terrible gov't. anakin as the tyro with a chip on his shoulder, equally hungry to make the old world perfect, and wipe the old world away
― goole, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
it would be interesting if Anakin is actually the MORE promising Jedi, not just in terms of his midichlorians and lifting-up-boxes abilities but in his actual faith in the system.
That would have been interesting, because in Ep.I Anakin is all "I wanna be a Jedi! Jedi's are badass!". So maybe he could have gradually found out that his dream job wasn't so great, that a lot of it was guarding diplomats and other boring tediousity. Same thing with Obi-Wan - he goes from stopping an invading army to getting sass-talked by a Jedi librarian. And in the end Palpatine's plans succeed because he's able to keep focusing on his game long after everyone else has nodded off or got bored.
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
you think lucas should have made it MORE boring??
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 16:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
That would have been like, the first half of Ep.II, then gradually winding up to Anakin's transformation into Vader over the next one and a half movies.
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 17:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
you guys are suggesting a rad 13-episode HBO miniseries not a rad 3-movie sci-fi trilogy
― max, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 17:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
most scifi epics would be better as HBO mini-series anyway
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 17:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
anything about the politics of the galactic senate i would totally watch but only if i can get really into it over the course of four months
― max, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 17:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
david simon's THE COUNCIL
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 17:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
Agreed that on paper a lot of these ideas don't necessarily sound more thrilling than what we got - I think we're taking it as a given that whatever the story was, it needed to be worked out through awesome set pieces, chases, near misses, the occasional light-saber fight, betrayals, shocking revelations, and cool aliens. But the story itself needs a compelling structure, and I think these are good for that, better than what we got ("The Council doesn't trust me and my wife is having bad dreams, I guess I'll start killing children").
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
See Phantom Menace could sound compelling on paper ("A small peaceful planet is being invaded and no one knows about it! We have to get to Coruscant and warn the council before it's too late!"). But there was never any real sense of threat, and that looong Tatooine detour slowed the plot to a crawl.
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
okay I think I hurt myself stifling laughter from rereading this thread
― lift this towel, its just a nipple (HI DERE), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
as a huge fan of the first 3 who never saw the new 3, can i just ask is there a clear outright winner for the title of BEST of these? is there an EMPIRE... of the 3 that even those who were anti like maybe a good chunk of?
― piscesx, Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
Revenge of the Sith is pretty clearly the best.
― I am flesh and blood. You are software and circuitry. (chap), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 18:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
I would rep for "Attack" if it didn't have the stupid meadow scene in it, but yeah "Revenge of the Sith" is pretty unambiguously the best realized of the three.
― lift this towel, its just a nipple (HI DERE), Tuesday, 17 November 2009 19:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
Seconded - "Attack" has some actually enjoyable sequences, basically everything to do with Obi-Wan, but "Revenge" comes the closest to a movie you'd want to watch again.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 00:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
basically everything to do with Obi-Wan
― WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 00:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
the first one is c-span with special effects and a quick channel change to a weird car race in saudi arabia
― jØrdån (omar little), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 00:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
basically i think the ultimate obi-wan story for the first three would for him to have been this reckless, wisecracking guy. probably should have been older than ewan mcgregor, imo. like s1ocki said, the han solo of the prequels. anakin should have been more similar to luke skywalker in terms of age and maybe even very basic story arc, i think. i dunno.
― jØrdån (omar little), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
could get behind a story arc that gave us all obi-wan for the first movie, tbh, with no anakin at all.
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
In the eighties I had a subscription to Science fiction mag Orbit. They wrote a story on what might have happened before the original trilogy. Their idea was that Anakin was a promising Jedi. So promising even, that he became cocky. So cocky even, that he thought he could destroy the Emperor all by himself. The Emperor was an upcoming crime lord, slowly destroying the peace and justice in the galaxy. The Emperor of course slashed Anakin to pieces. But instead of simply killing Anakin, he let him live and forced him - Anakin, the most promising Jedi ever - to become his personal slave and servant: Darth Vader. The ultimate humiliation. Sith Lords thrive on hate and hate makes them prisoners of the dark side. Vader of course hated the Emperor, which meant he would never be able to escape him or destroy him. His hate made him the impressive, sadistic dark lord we would come to know from the original trilogy, which helped the Emperor in his takeover of the galaxy.
The motivation for this story was, that in Return of Jedi, Luke tries to work on Vader's feelings, by stating that he did not accept that Vader is his father but that he accepted that Vader was once Anakin Skywalker. Vader replies that this name no longer has any meaning for him. This implies that by now Vader has accepted his fate. This acceptance, this resignation, allowed his hate to tone down; because only caring people hate. In short, Vader had let go his feelings (as Yoda claimed every Jedi must be able to). This allowed him to get in touch again with the good side of the force, with Anakin Skywalker, which enabled him to destroy the Emperor and redeem himself.
I still like this idea.
― Sebastian (Royal Mermaid Mover), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
I forgot: the Emperor kept Vader alive through the force. So if Vader tried to kill him, he himself would die to. At the end of Return of the Jedi, he was at ease with this fact and did what he had to do, and finally could do.
― Sebastian (Royal Mermaid Mover), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
because only caring people hate
what a wonderful world that would be, eh? I routinely hate the fucker in the queue ahead of me, tbh
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
Hey, this is movie rhetoric. Bear with me.
― Sebastian (Royal Mermaid Mover), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
always saw the emperor/vader dynamic in IV-VI as a direct rip of the Saruman/Wormtongue relationship at the end of LOTR
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
disclaimer for george's lawyers- there are clearly no parallels to be drawn whatsoever from mr lucas's masterwork and tolkien's sprawling mess.
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 01:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
which, let's not forget, didn't even exist until the late 90's AFAIK
From John Hodgman's Phantom Menace:
"at this point you will want to know what is the solution to the jar jar problem. i understand. everyone hates jar jar. in fact everything in my screenplay flows from this very simple fix and that is: replace him with sebulba."
someone transcribe this!http://www.thisamericanlife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=963
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
you do it
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
i'm real glad that to this day i still have absolutely no idea what jar jar binks sounds like or what he says.
― piscesx, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
to be honest it becomes a super bummer here:"there's a reason I would work on my screenplay while falling asleep, at night, dozing in the hospital while my mother was dying, or when i was awake in bed in october 2001 listening for planes over NYC"
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
― jØrdån (omar little), Tuesday, November 17, 2009 8:02 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
imo he should have followed luke's arc almost exactly up to the point where he chooses bad where luke chose good
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
the greatest crime of george lucas is tricking me into writing fan fiction :(
― Alf, Lord Melmacsyn (s1ocki), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
At least you're not writing jarjar slash...
I would rep for "Attack" if it didn't have the stupid meadow scene in it
The meadow scene is funny and I enjoy it more than I do any other scene from the prequels. I think I know all of the lines from it, being so memorably bad.
― ô_o (Nicole), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 02:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
i think it gives us an insight into just how hard lucas would find it to chat to the opposite sex if he wasn't a bajillionaire.
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Wednesday, 18 November 2009 03:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
watching Star Wars on TV now, the 'name the system' line gave me a little lol.
― FC Tom Tomsk Club (Merdeyeux), Saturday, 21 November 2009 17:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
On ITV1? I stopped after there were two 5 minute breaks within the first half hour.
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah. and then the 15-minute news break. I thought there were broadcast rules that you could only have a break every 45 minutes when showing films? I guess I'd mind more if I hadn't seen it a hundred thousand times already.
― FC Tom Tomsk Club (Merdeyeux), Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
I think it's probably signalled the end of my fanatical interest. It's taken a lot though: 1) on ITV1 and cut to pieces with long ad breaks, 2) stupid ITN news break, 3) Lucas's Greedo-shoots-first-Han-steps-on-Jabba's-tail-blah-di-blah cut, 4) shown after ITV1 has shown the three prequels (guess that answers a question upthread about when is some kid going to see them in I-VI order). But still I switched on the TV.
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
you know though, chopped to bits and sprinkled with Lucas's meddling it may be, but the final attack on the Death Star still rocks the fuckin' bells like nothing else in the whole series.
― Bill A, Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
I think Jedi has the best space battle. The asteroid chase in Empire is pretty fucking intense too.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
yeah, Jedi's insane screen-filling battle is A+. Admiral Ackbar! Hoth attack in Empire also stupendous.
― Bill A, Saturday, 21 November 2009 18:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
they changed the advert timing rules about a year ago iirc
― a hoy hoy, Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
Empire is on next week.Rebel: "Commander, Echo Base is under attack by..." <CUT-TO-AD-BREAK> Katie Price covered in cockroaches(OK so it's not that bad, yet...)
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
totally derails the thread, but this is (a small part of) why when UK people piss and moan about the BBC licence fee I totally disagree. No adverts in films, yo.
― Bill A, Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
that and the bbc is fucking awesome on so many other levels.
― a hoy hoy, Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
£142.50 is a bargain, even if all it meant was not being spammed every ten minutes with commercials that assume I'm a moron.
― so says surgeon snoball (snoball), Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
I had some fella trying to flog me sky HD for £50 a month yesterday, which puts things in perspective I'd say. Again, it's not really a crime of George Lucas, but I *bet* he is pals with Murdoch. Or at least likes him, they certainly share a marketing ethos.
― Bill A, Saturday, 21 November 2009 19:12 (3 years ago) Permalink
― I HEART CREEPY MENS (Deric W. Haircare), Saturday, 21 November 2009 20:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
there are no crimes being committed in that video, unless awesomeness is a crime
― fel (latebloomer), Saturday, 21 November 2009 23:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
Rebel: "Commander, Echo Base is under attack by..." <CUT-TO-AD-BREAK> Katie Price covered in cockroaches
I think if I had to come up with the one thing that most confuses me about the UK, it would be Katie Price.
― Matt Armstrong, Saturday, 21 November 2009 23:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
is THX 1138 his best movie...?
― Owa Tana Siam (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 3 December 2009 23:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
I watched it the other night for the first time in what must be 20 years and its pretty good but kinda empty. struck mainly by two things:
1) even THIS film he had to fuck with. the digitally added stuff is so jarring and glaringly out-of-place. not to mention totally unnecessary. this guy is the most insecure filmmaker of all time.2) what works about this is rather blatantly cribbed from its primary sources - We, 1984, etc. Lucas' major contribution to the genre is almost entirely in terms of design/style. The minimalism, both of the narrative and of the overall look and feel, is great. Of course by the end he doesn't know what to do and just turns it into a stupid chase scene with a completely anticlimactic ending.
― Owa Tana Siam (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 3 December 2009 23:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
Nah.... American Graffiti and Star Wars are better imho
― WILLIM GARLOS CILLIAMS (stevie), Friday, 4 December 2009 08:06 (3 years ago) Permalink
It'd be kinda cool if Lucas went back and digitally added nudity to American Graffiti.
― Fox Force Five Punchline (sexyDancer), Friday, 4 December 2009 16:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
Most active thred gets this:
― Astronaut Mike Dexter (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Thursday, 10 December 2009 02:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
Rats. Wish Lynch had said yes
― lukevalentine, Thursday, 10 December 2009 02:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
what jabba would have done to poor leia in a lynchian ROTJ doesn't bear thinking about
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 December 2009 02:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
a completely anticlimactic ending.
love the ending! final shot is superb
also wish he did not digitally fuck w/ it
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 10 December 2009 02:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
*shudder*
the Ewoks were the beginning of the end for moi
― lukevalentine, Thursday, 10 December 2009 03:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
he showed me many animals and thingsthen he took me for a ride in his ferrarifor a lunch
― sonderangerbot, Thursday, 10 December 2009 03:09 (3 years ago) Permalink
I love how it's totally "I knew George Lewcas -- he was the man who made the star war."
― Astronaut Mike Dexter (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Thursday, 10 December 2009 03:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
i admire george lucas very much, my lawyer tells me he does wonderful things with bears
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 December 2009 03:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
Ewoks included, ROTJ is still better than Dune.
― Stereo no aware (Daruton), Thursday, 10 December 2009 03:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
total "too much time on ILX" moment here
― an terror has occurred (sic), Thursday, 10 December 2009 05:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
;)
― jabba hands, Thursday, 10 December 2009 05:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
"don't you fucking wookie at me!"
― unified theory of objectionable thoughts (latebloomer), Thursday, 10 December 2009 05:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
ROTJ is a serious movie with humour coming naturally out of the situations, and unfortunately with the Ewok cuteness tacked on. I got the feeling that Dune is a sci-fi panto more or less deliberately played for LOLs - ie, Sting coming out of a sauna wearing a Harkonnen crest as a codpiece, BvH's death, etc..
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 09:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
dune is a much, much prettier movie to look at tho
― krampus activities (latebloomer), Thursday, 10 December 2009 09:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
rotj is kinda fugly in some spots
important in an f/x heavy sci-fi epic ya know!
― krampus activities (latebloomer), Thursday, 10 December 2009 09:08 (3 years ago) Permalink
dune is 10000 times better to watch stoned
― max, Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
better soundtrack too
did people get offended by the ewoks when they were kids watching ROTJ?
― Smokey and the S'Banned It (history mayne), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
no. and after watching Caravan Of Courage i immediately rewound the tape and watched again.
― mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
I just accepted them as coming from the same universe that produced all the weird-assed creatures in the first two movies and I still do.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
i wonder what kids who first see the '97 version prefer out of Ewoks and that dreadful song they added to the Jabba's Palace scenes
― mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
My kid saw the '97 version first (at age 4) and for a few weeks would put ROTJ into the DVD player for the sole purpose of watching the Jabba's Palace song over and over again. I was in hell.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:43 (3 years ago) Permalink
Like, I taught you to use the remote and this is how you repay me?
did you let them watch the prequels first?
― mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
The title of the song is apparently "Jedi Rocks".
xp: I tried to actively discourage Mrs. Kongvsgodzilla from buying the prequels at all, but I failed in that. His favorite Star Wars is Revenge of the Sith.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
Really, all of the movies are too long and slowly paced for him to really get into yet.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
any idea what they think the scariest scene(s) out of the 6 films are? sorry, just quite curious. i don't remember ever finding Darth Vader scary for example (much scarier when he takes his helmet off at the end of ROTJ). As I said before, I think limbless Anakin bursting into flames in ROTS would've freaked me out a LOT if i'd seen that as a child.
― mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:52 (3 years ago) Permalink
emperor is pretty scary with the flashing and the lightening and being old and all
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
Palpatine was a fucking joke in ROTJ. Even as a kid I was all like, "THIS is the geezer everyone's afraid of?" Throw him down a flight of stairs.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 13:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
or just switch off his stairlift halfway down. but his magic was good.
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
The bit in ROTS where he turns into Paul Daniels is pretty frightening.
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:04 (3 years ago) Permalink
he really looks like Gary Oldman in Dracula during the transition to Emperor. that whole stretch is preposterous but actually quite entertaining.
― mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:16 (3 years ago) Permalink
"You're going to like this. Not a lot, but you'll like it. Now say 'Yes Palpatine!' <throws voice> Yes Palpatine!"
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
Vader takes off his mask... and it's the lovely Debbie McGee.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
any idea what they think the scariest scene(s) out of the 6 films are?
He professes to not be scared of anything (at all, full stop). This includes Star Wars. I'll have to ask if he thinks there's anything that's scariest.
I know for a fact that he was extremely scared when Fizzgig got thrown down into that hole in Dark Crystal, though.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:21 (3 years ago) Permalink
I, on the other hand, had to be escorted from the theater when I attended Empire Strikes Back as a child because there had been a statue of Darth Vader in the lobby.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
As I said before, I think limbless Anakin bursting into flames in ROTS would've freaked me out a LOT if i'd seen that as a child.
OK, last week I went to that Star Wars In Concert deal. One of the selections the orchestra played was "Battle of the Heroes" from the ROTS score, and it was accompanied by video of the big Anakin/Obi-Wan lightsaber fight, lots of Vader footage from ESB and ROTJ, Anakin killing the sandpeople, etc. Plus there were live fire effects on stage. A little kid sitting behind us, about 6-7 years old, got absolutely pants-wetting terrified. He burst into sobs and was crying, "I want my mommy!" It occurred to me that it's very possible that a lot of little-little kids haven't even seen ROTS.
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
LOL - that is my kid's favorite scene from that movie! Do you think he'll turn out weird or something?
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
Also, when my Dad took me to see ROTJ, I made us leave because somebody was smoking in the theater and I was afraid it would start a fire.
I was "sensitive".
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Thursday, 10 December 2009 14:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^^
The Star Wars movies I find don't hold up under such sensory-enhanced scrutiny, particularly ROTJ, which at times feels like you are watching a weird daytime TV soap opera.
― Adam Bruneau, Thursday, 10 December 2009 15:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
Empire is easily the best designed. I think it's a very elegant movie, visually.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 15:28 (3 years ago) Permalink
on the money. It looks wonderful.
― Bill A, Thursday, 10 December 2009 15:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
emperor is pretty scary in a cool sinister-but-wise way in rotj
disturbing scenes for me as a kid - lukes parents black skeleton bones on fire and jabbas palace scene was a bit ooky.
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Your overconfidence is your weakness!""Your faith in your friends is yours!"
Classic comeback, particularly with his sneering offhand delivery.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
^^ ha yes, a brilliant pwnage.
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
"your faith in your friends is yours"
i guess turned out to be his weakness too?
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
here's an underrated howler: "Soon I'll be dead, and you with me."
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
Also fond of:
Seriously, Palpatine rocks the house in Jedi.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, the faux pussy voice would have enlivened several hundred lines in ROTS.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
The disgruntled expression on ol' Emp's face right after Luke's "I am a Jedi, like my father before me" speech is ace.
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
no he's fucking MIFFED.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
Luke looks like Richard Chamberlain here.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
disturbing scenes for me as a kid - lukes parents black skeleton bones on fire
Even today that is jarringly graphic by the standards of the other 5 movies, as is the bloody, cut-off arm in the cantina scene.
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 17:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
This is the point in the thread where I remind everyone that nowhere in ROTJ is the word "Ewok" ever uttered, and that the only reason any of us even know what an Ewok is is that Lucasfilm's marketing is utterly insidious.
Utterly Insidious should have been the name of an evil Jedi in one of the prequels, BTW.
― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 10 December 2009 18:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
It more or less was.
― james cameron gargameled my boner for life (Pancakes Hackman), Thursday, 10 December 2009 18:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
scariest scene by far is luke's vader hallucination where he cuts off his head... so freaky
― 9/11 WAS AN INSIDE JOKE (s1ocki), Thursday, 10 December 2009 19:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
Luke's "I am a Jedi, like my father before me"
haha i love lukes little head nod, to where darth is lay in agony, when he says this
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
The heroes are pretty cruel in this movie. (Luke killing that guy's pet masterblaster; Leia choking fat muppet to death) Has it ever been established in the Star Wars canon exactly why the Empire is the bad guy beyond having a ridiculous military budget?
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
I don't know the specifics, but I think killing Bothans probably comes into it somewhere.
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
didn't they destroy an entire planet?
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
Refusal to lower exorbitant Galactic Capital Gains Tax.
― uninspired girls rejoice!!! (Hoot Smalley), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:29 (3 years ago) Permalink
ALDERAAN... never forget
― donde está mia farrow, fa la la la la, la la la la (s1ocki), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
There's a line in the original Ep IV script about how the Empire are nationalising industry... Just like Obama wants to, look out America!
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
Emporer: "Does anyone have any questions?"Moff Random: "Why does the fiscal budget have a deficit of thirty trillion Galactic credits?"<Force lightning vapourises Random>Emporer: "Does anyone have any other questions?"
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
jawas did alderaan
― you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon (omar little), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
The first part of my post is actually true, by the way.
― Communi-Bear Silo State (chap), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
lolling
― wtf?!? just randomly started crying! (HI DERE), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:37 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Does anyone have any other questions?"
"Have you found Luke Skywalker yet? And do you have any knowledge of the location of the rebel base?"
― bracken free ditch (Ste), Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
Hearts and minds:
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 10 December 2009 21:42 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Why did you promote Mr. Bronson from Grange Hill to Admiral?"
― HUH? not appropriate (snoball), Thursday, 10 December 2009 22:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
"ALDERAAN... never forget"
Pretty harsh, true, but what else are they gonna do with a Death Star?
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 10 December 2009 22:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
Turn it into a shopping mall.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 22:56 (3 years ago) Permalink
What would people buy? They all wear the same thing.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 10 December 2009 23:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
A do-it-yourself midi-chlorian kit.
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 10 December 2009 23:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
My sister told me it works like an insulin injection.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, December 10, 2009 5:50 PM (54 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
very true - that's what people never understood about nazi concentration camps
― donde está mia farrow, fa la la la la, la la la la (s1ocki), Thursday, 10 December 2009 23:45 (3 years ago) Permalink
Death Star analog isn't concentration camps; it's Enola Gay.
Well it would have been if they'd won the war.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 10 December 2009 23:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
― krampus activities (latebloomer), Friday, 18 December 2009 09:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://www.slashfilm.com/2009/12/17/watch-this-70-minute-video-review-of-star-wars-the-phantom-menace/
this is way too long and kind of annoying but also kind of amazing
― akira goldsman (s1ocki), Saturday, 19 December 2009 07:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
I turned it off after 5 minutes - is there anything worth watching in the other 65
the main thing I took away from it was that this guy has an awesome voice and I wish I could speak like that
― 囧 (dyao), Saturday, 19 December 2009 07:11 (3 years ago) Permalink
I just watched the whole thing, it's devastating - you should at least watch to the end of the first one before giving up. Found the guy's persona pretty annoying at first but came round to it pretty quickly.
― poster x (ledge), Saturday, 19 December 2009 10:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
haha I just gave this a second chance and now that I'm getting a sense of his attitude it is getting better (also helps by keeping it on the background while I waste time on ilx)
― =皿= (dyao), Saturday, 19 December 2009 11:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
lool at the basement scene
― =皿= (dyao), Saturday, 19 December 2009 11:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
amazingly funny line-for-line considering how long it is
― jabba hands, Saturday, 19 December 2009 11:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
the slashfilm article treats this like found art
― abanana, Saturday, 19 December 2009 12:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
How come every fucking scene in these movies involves someone standing in front of a window with a million fucking things happening in the background.― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:22 PM Bookmark
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:22 PM Bookmark
^^ this is one of those posts where, after you've read it, you can never see the movies in the same way again. So OTM it's not funny.
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 24 December 2009 14:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
watching the long review - - similar to Angry Video Game Nerd it kinda drags when he's trying to be funny external to the movies....but when he's just going on and on dissecting in detail all the inane crap that adds up to the boring pointlessness of the movie, the LOLs kinda just rack up.
― Doctor Casino, Friday, 25 December 2009 07:13 (3 years ago) Permalink
The Times quoted an associate of George Lucas, saying the Star Wars director will spend $10 million to update his 1977 movie into 3-D.
“George cannot leave it alone,” said the unnamed source. “He is salivating at the opportunity to play with it again. This time the Death Star is really going to explode all over the audience and leave them gasping.”
― CATBEAST 7777 (ledge), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 16:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
gross
― living like the Na'vi will never happen (HI DERE), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 16:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
explode all over the audience and leave them gasping.
― NotEnough, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 16:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
He is salivating at the opportunity to play with it again.
Well, there you go.
― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 16:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
― ┌∩┐(◕_◕)┌∩┐ (Steve Shasta), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 16:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
After a few years of complying with Gallagher’s conditions, Ron began blurring the line between his act and that of his brother. He would often promote his act as “Gallagher Too,” a moniker Gallagher felt was insufficiently informative. In some instances, Ron’s act was promoted in a way that provided no clue to prospective attendees that they were seeing someone other than Gallagher himself.Gallagher initially attempted to get his brother to stop these activities by requesting that he stop using Gallagher’s well-known Sledge-O-Matic routine. These efforts proved futile, and Ron kept touring as “Gallagher Too” (often spelled "Gallagher Two") while using the Sledge-O-Matic routine his older brother had made famous. In August 2000 Gallagher sued his brother for trademark violations and false advertising. The courts ultimately sided with Leo Gallagher, and an injunction was granted prohibiting Ron from performing any act that impersonates his brother in small clubs and venues.
― Who Makes the Na'vis? (s1ocki), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 17:03 (3 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, but it's Noel who really got screwed - i mean his act is nothing without the Sledge-o-Matic.
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
seriously will someone send Lucas a neverending stream of hookers so that he will be too tired to continue ruining the original Star Wars movies
― living like the Na'vi will never happen (HI DERE), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
with our luck the new 3-D Star Wars will have 3-D hookers
― that sex version of "blue thunder." (Mr. Que), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:55 (3 years ago) Permalink
this 3-d version is gonna put the "oo!" in tatooine"!
― da croupier, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
makes me wonder who will carry on George's legacy of endlessly remaking Star Wars after he's gone
― shake hands with Gongo? (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:58 (3 years ago) Permalink
ihttp://scrapetv.com/News/News%20Pages/Entertainment/Images/michael-bay.jpg
only 44
― da croupier, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 20:59 (3 years ago) Permalink
this is roxxxy, she will escort you to your seat
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
Whoa -- Lucas is inserting Justice Kennedy into his new 3-D sploogefest?
― Hell is other people. In an ILE film forum. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
i meant 3-D jawa hookers
― that sex version of "blue thunder." (Mr. Que), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
oh that's not creepy at all
if I were Karen O I would be constantly looking over my sholder for that dude
― living like the Na'vi will never happen (HI DERE), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
lolz Alfred you are WAY too into the supreme court
― shake hands with Gongo? (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
with our luck the new 3-D Star Wars will have 3-D hookers?
― Sebastian (Royal Mermaid Mover), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:01 (3 years ago) Permalink
is that the droid i'm looking for or are you just happy to see me?
― da croupier, Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
still roffling at freudian PR
― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Tuesday, 12 January 2010 21:07 (3 years ago) Permalink
will this settle the debate once and for all of who shot first
― dyao, Wednesday, 13 January 2010 02:39 (3 years ago) Permalink
good god that sex doll looks like an old friend of mine. creepy!
― la última intimidad (latebloomer), Wednesday, 13 January 2010 04:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
"old friend"
― nutrition na'vi (s1ocki), Wednesday, 13 January 2010 04:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
― la última intimidad (latebloomer), Wednesday, 13 January 2010 06:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
The sex doll's on the left, latebloomer.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 13 January 2010 06:33 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/filmblog/2010/jan/28/star-wars-george-lucas-avatar
― piscesx, Thursday, 28 January 2010 21:00 (3 years ago) Permalink
I don't understand how the success of Avatar is a demonstration of how 1977 Star Wars can be made 3D. They had to invent new cameras and shit for Avatar; is GL planning on reshooting the entire series again or something?
If not, I'm trying to think of how you could make it all 3D. In at least the first 3 films I think you could pull of a 2.5D. Certainly the effects shots would be doable and in most shots you could simply cut out the actors and backgrounds and have them on separate planes. He could even re-create in 3D CGI all the backgrounds in the original series and place the actors over those, also ala 2.5D, but a true 3D experience derived from 2D would be impossible.
Not even with all of Lucas's money.
― Adam Bruneau, Thursday, 28 January 2010 23:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
is GL planning on reshooting the entire series again or something?
don't give him any ideas
― The Tommy Westphall Universe Hypothesis (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 28 January 2010 23:50 (3 years ago) Permalink
in fact, please take away all the ideas he has now and lock them in a box and then set that box on fire and throw the ashes into the ocean
There's talk of 3d Raiders and Titanic too. I don't get how it works, either. I guess you could take the 2d images and then just guess at their 3d shape? Seems like it would end up wonky.
― Matt Armstrong, Friday, 29 January 2010 00:15 (3 years ago) Permalink
has to be said despite everything, 3-D Raiders = yum!
― piscesx, Friday, 29 January 2010 01:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
I would rather him gussy up his old bullshit instead of making new abominations.
― Your body is a spiderland (polyphonic), Friday, 29 January 2010 01:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
But for chronic tinkerer Lucas, old bullshit becomes new abominations.
― Blue Fucks Like Ben Nelson (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 29 January 2010 01:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
Sorry to be the one to break this to you, then:
http://ca.reuters.com/article/entertainmentNews/idCATRE60R19C20100128
In short: he's making a 3D CGI musical about fairies
― Adam Bruneau, Friday, 29 January 2010 01:34 (3 years ago) Permalink
Anyone see the 3D Toy Story re-releases? They're meant to look pretty good although not as good as dedicated 3D.
― Number None, Friday, 29 January 2010 01:47 (3 years ago) Permalink
this picture makes me sad that there was never actually a direct encounter between the droids and Vader ("you seem familiar to me puny mechanoid..."). i consider this a crime on GL's part.
― mdskltr (blueski), Monday, 1 February 2010 15:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
I found that because I got the idea today to try my hand at 3d-izing a Star Wars scene in order to get net notoriety/maybe a job and wanted to see if someone had already done so. I suppose the method was similar to this:
http://magazine.creativecow.net/article/creative-cow-magazine-nosferatu-becomes-orlok-the-vampire-in-3d
― Adam Bruneau, Monday, 15 February 2010 19:46 (3 years ago) Permalink
That sounds like a lot of work! Is there any way to automate it a little?
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 15 February 2010 20:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/04/05/laugh-it-up-fuzzball-lucas-plans-star-wars-comedy-series/
budddwyer.gif
― goole, Tuesday, 6 April 2010 17:31 (3 years ago) Permalink
Mon-Cal stand up: "OK, so these two Niemoidians walk into a bar. The first one says to the barman..."
― Convenience Fish (snoball), Tuesday, 6 April 2010 17:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
No Bea Arthur, no credibility.
― ô_o (Nicole), Tuesday, 6 April 2010 17:57 (3 years ago) Permalink
― latebloomer, Tuesday, 6 April 2010 18:23 (3 years ago) Permalink
to be fair to ewan tho what would you do if you were cast as OBI WAN FUCKING KENOBI and you show up to the set the first day and find out you have to do a scene opposite the kid from jingle all the way and stepin fechit inside a blue room?― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:21 PM Bookmark
― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:21 PM Bookmark
So OTM, and so sad. Would love to see someone get at this in an interview w/ him.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 04:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
Watching Ewan McGregor in The Men Who Stare at Goats is pretty good--he gets to play the whole movie not knowing what the fuck a jedi is.
― WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Wednesday, 7 April 2010 05:25 (3 years ago) Permalink
for several years i actually haven't been sure if i'd even bothered to see the last of the prequels, until i watched one of the youtubes up there and, yes, i suppose i've seen it. that's the one that ends with the whole frankenstein's monster bit right?
you know, i haven't dwelt upon it because i don't really give a shit about star wars, but these movies are truly terrible on just about every level, aren't they? the hubris of lucas to write these things himself....
― by another name (amateurist), Wednesday, 7 April 2010 10:38 (3 years ago) Permalink
actually they are terrible but not, to me anyway, even memorably terrible. i mean aside from that frankenstein's monster bit i can't recall a single thing from any of the prequels except maybe jar jar and the jew alien from the first one.
― by another name (amateurist), Wednesday, 7 April 2010 10:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
90 minute review of Episode 2 from the guy who did the 70 minute Phantom Menace review:
― abanana, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 10:51 (3 years ago) Permalink
Clones is the only somewhat terrible one.
But then, Star Wars was never that great in the first place.
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 7 April 2010 11:27 (3 years ago) Permalink
see, what i like about these reviews is that they point out the prequels were actually demonstrably terrible cinema - in terms of plot and story and acting - in a way that the original star wars movies, whatever you thought of them and their impact on hollywood, never were.
― "I DONT WANT HOUSE CHICKEN I WANT THIS PLACE CHICKEN!" (stevie), Wednesday, 7 April 2010 11:48 (3 years ago) Permalink
Agreed, altho I was a bit disappointed with the Clones review for getting even MORE bogged down in the "look, the narrator is a creepy serial killer" gimmick.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 12:41 (3 years ago) Permalink
absolutely - fast forwarded thru those bits. in need of a fan edit...
― p-dog, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 12:44 (3 years ago) Permalink
Also how GL took the magic from the first films and tried to recreate it with all the subtly of an assembly line robot. Lousy plot and pacing aside, he manages to take everything magical about Star Wars and explain it, dumb it down, and mass-produce it until it's on the screen every 5 minutes and you no longer care. I like how the recent Clones Wars review goes into ruining light sabers in this way. Also the bit where he's comparing Yoda's Zen Master discussions of the force from "Empire" to all the Jedi basically acting like irrational Michael Bay characters in the new ones is so OTM.
All one needs to do is look at that footage of them making the prequels. Everyone looks miserable and terrified.
― Adam Bruneau, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 12:53 (3 years ago) Permalink
"Watching Ewan McGregor in The Men Who Stare at Goats is pretty good"I can't put my finger on what's wrong with this movie, because how can you go wrong with Kevin Spacey and Jeff Bridges going gonzo? But this movie is somehow just as lifeless as the prequels.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 17:36 (3 years ago) Permalink
what was wrong is they had a boring narrator who can't master an american accent tell us a goofy story involving charismatic actors rather than let us see it for ourselves. removing ewan wouldn't have necessarily made it more inspired, but it would have at least gotten closer to something worthwhile.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 18:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
part of why i haven't seen that Ghost Writer is a real "fool me once, shame on you" vibe involving movies where Ewan uncovers the secrets of more entertaining performers.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 7 April 2010 18:19 (3 years ago) Permalink
not very remarkable...until you realize who's doing the voice over
― I have a big tv with blue ray's (latebloomer), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:32 (3 years ago) Permalink
holy shit is that harrison ford
― beyond rong goon (tremendoid), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:40 (3 years ago) Permalink
indeed it is
― I have a big tv with blue ray's (latebloomer), Saturday, 1 May 2010 15:22 (3 years ago) Permalink
Kind of a great trailer either way - - - just pitch it as the continuing adventures of your favorite characters. I'd have gone!
― Doctor Casino, Saturday, 1 May 2010 15:26 (3 years ago) Permalink
i just love how the voiceover seems so typical until you realize it's ford and then the sneering sarcastic tone comes through
― I have a big tv with blue ray's (latebloomer), Saturday, 1 May 2010 15:30 (3 years ago) Permalink
did you guys cover the Seth Green Star Wars sitcom yet?
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 1 May 2010 15:49 (3 years ago) Permalink
All in all Ford's pretty bad as a voiceover artist.
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 16:05 (3 years ago) Permalink
That trailer does have the cut shot of C3p0 ripping off the warning label from the door.
― WTF cat with unfitting music (kingfish), Saturday, 1 May 2010 16:18 (3 years ago) Permalink
and I'm guessing the tone is deliberate on Harrison's part, since it's the same voice he adopts when doing the wormy fan guy during "Blade Runner"
― WTF cat with unfitting music (kingfish), Saturday, 1 May 2010 16:20 (3 years ago) Permalink
im seeing that people vs george lucas movie next week. expecting it to basically be the film adaptation of this thread.
― nitzer Ed (s1ocki), Saturday, 1 May 2010 16:35 (3 years ago) Permalink
Love the way he says "It's an epic of romance"
― WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Saturday, 1 May 2010 16:54 (3 years ago) Permalink
― WTF cat with unfitting music (kingfish), Saturday, May 1, 2010 4:20 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark
i know, i love it. he does the v.o. like it's so beneath him.
― I have a big tv with blue ray's (latebloomer), Saturday, 1 May 2010 20:02 (3 years ago) Permalink
I was trying to find the Jar-Jar Binks translator and had forgotten how ridiculous parts of this thread are.
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
jar-jar's home planet was the answer to a clue in this sunday's crossword puzzle--i was indignant that my girlfriend didn't understand why i didn't know.
― call all destroyer, Monday, 9 August 2010 17:06 (2 years ago) Permalink
ha I am indignant that you didn't know!
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
so upset this revive didn't bring the latest iteration of those youtube prequel dismantlings
― are you some kinda rap version of marc loi (stevie), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
Definitely a serious crime. Lock GL up for good. Whoever thought this was a good idea is a danger to the human race:
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:47 (2 years ago) Permalink
It's supposed to be children's candy.
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
It looks like something from a very specialist sex shop.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
that's been mentioned multiple times; I think I still have one in its wrapper that I bought at Toys R Us in 1998 because srsly wtf
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
You should combine it with what I believe is referred to as a 'Vibr4ting J3lly T0ngue' - you'll make a fortune on e-b4y. Actually that's a great business idea, SW themed sex toys.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
THAT IS NOT A GREAT BUSINESS IDEA
PLEASE GOD LET THAT NOT BE A GREAT BUSINESS IDEA
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
Abbott already foreshadowed that idea in that ILTMI thread
― dyao, Monday, 9 August 2010 17:57 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp You know that somewhere, someone's already doing this.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 17:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
what does it say about me that I am way cooler with the idea of man-eating Ewoks than I am a Jar-Jar Binks dildo
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
you guys are fucking gross and insane is what you are
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:05 (2 years ago) Permalink
I cannot get the idea of a vibrating Jar-Jar jelly tongue doing serious damage to my anus as well as my brain
^^ has never put on a black condom while singing the imperial march
― dyao, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:05 (2 years ago) Permalink
man-eating ewoks sounds like debauched Queen record-release party legend.
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
Man-eating ewoks with bowls of cocaine tied to their heads.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
"man-eating Ewok" sounds like the nickname Elton John's security detail had for him.
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
that's one hell of a tongue
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
Use the Force, Dan.
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
much respect to john williams, but queen should have scored return of the jedi instead of wasting it on highlander.
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
Luke's Licksaber - now in 5 different flavors!
― da croupier, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
They should have re-used the music they did for Flash Gordon."Luke... ahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! And some ewok cannibals! DUN DUN DUNDUN DUN DUN"
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
I can totally hear "Killer Queen" blasting as Vader marches Luke up the stairs to meet the Emperor.
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee are the champions"
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
R2 R2 D2! CLAP BOOM BOOM CLAP
― da croupier, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
buddy you're a droid make a big noise
ok now I'm just weird al, sorry
― da croupier, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
"It's a kind of maaagic..."
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 18:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
― da croupier, Monday, 9 August 2010 18:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
the past hours worth of posts should be c&p'ed into a new thread:
"The crimes of the crimes of george lucas ('90's on) thread"
― Mr. Que, Monday, 9 August 2010 19:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:44 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
finest hour
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
Just seeing it again resulted in a real-life LOL.
― thanks for the feedback (supra) (Phil D.), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
far and away
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
just the 5 seconds my brain spent trying to process that the first time i read it... amazing
Remember happier times for them?
― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 August 2010 19:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
uh... yes?
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp now that really is "far far away"
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
Did anyone ever see that movie? Seems like a complete memory hole of a release.
― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 August 2010 19:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
i remember that happening.
but what does it have to do with GL?
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, August 9, 2010
― strongohulkingtonsghost, Monday, 9 August 2010 19:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
oh
right
i was secretly hoping that was another "wrong thread" posting we could all laugh about
― the itsytitchyschneider (s1ocki), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
My wife saw "Far and Away" and felt like Tom and Nicole had the sexual chemistry of a gay man and a random cheerleader.
― people are for loving (HI DERE), Monday, 9 August 2010 19:51 (2 years ago) Permalink
I was just thinking about this today: I had this old coworker, in his 50s or so, and when this movie came out everyone at work was complaining about Jar-Jar. And this guy says, "I don't get why everyone has such a problem with Jar-Jar and how he talks – I happen to like Jamaican people."
― spanikopitcon (Abbott), Monday, 9 August 2010 21:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
That's so clueless as to be kind of sweet.
― rhythm fixated member (chap), Monday, 9 August 2010 21:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
that's when I thought Tom Cruise was cute. Sigh.
― Gucci Mane hermeneuticist (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 9 August 2010 22:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Jar Jar Binks character will be legendary and deserves to permanently destroy the Star Wars legacy. To quote the Rifftrax guys (who really do a great job tearing TPM to shreds) It is offensive on a metaphysical level.
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 9 August 2010 22:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
just about to watch this, anyone else seen it?
― a hoy hoy, Monday, 9 August 2010 22:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
It's so bizarre, it's some strange frankenstein's monster gone horribly wrong, the abject repressed nightmare inside the mind of a marketing executive who is having a bad acid trip. That something so grotesque and hideous was actually - and eagerly - created is bizarre beyond comprehension. He looks like if you bred Bug Bunny and a duckbill platypus and then had the resulting spawn skinned.
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 9 August 2010 22:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah I've watched that review - there's some very sharp criticism. The persona the guy puts on can get a bit much, but worth watching.
― rhythm fixated member (chap), Monday, 9 August 2010 22:47 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 9 August 2010 23:06 (2 years ago) Permalink
fuckin Mynocks, how do they work?
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 10 August 2010 02:47 (2 years ago) Permalink
george lucas with the lid off
― blap...tremendo (deej), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 03:15 (2 years ago) Permalink
on part 4 of that attack of the clones review. wow.
― not everything is a campfire (ian), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 03:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucas's "crimes" pale before Tarantino's
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 03:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
damn that's challenging
― da croupier, Tuesday, 10 August 2010 03:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
"Lucas's crimes against liberty pale before Tarantino's"
― buzza, Tuesday, 10 August 2010 03:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
still can't believe you rep for the star wars prequels morbs... i can not even imagine what you are thinking standing up for this kiddie cartoon trash
― snooki stackhouse (s1ocki), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 04:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
I DONT 'REP'
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 06:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
you kids with your newfangled jibber jabber.
― Matt Armstrong, Tuesday, 10 August 2010 06:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
he doesn't rep but he does resent!
― caek boss (latebloomer), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 06:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, August 10, 2010 2:20 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark
I said, "Mom, what are you doing, you're ruining my rep"She said, "You're only sixteen, you don't have a rep yet"
― snooki stackhouse (s1ocki), Tuesday, 10 August 2010 13:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
very illuminating interview w/Lucas' former producer/associate Gary Kurtz:
http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/music/la-et-gary-kurtz-20100812,0,134728,full.story
― caek boss (latebloomer), Thursday, 12 August 2010 20:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
The discussed ending of the film that Kurtz favored presented the rebel forces in tatters, Leia grappling with her new duties as queen and Luke walking off alone “like Clint Eastwood in the spaghetti westerns,” as Kurtz put it.Kurtz said that ending would have been a more emotionally nuanced finale to an epic adventure than the forest celebration of the Ewoks that essentially ended the trilogy with a teddy bear luau.
Kurtz said that ending would have been a more emotionally nuanced finale to an epic adventure than the forest celebration of the Ewoks that essentially ended the trilogy with a teddy bear luau.
sigh
― grateful dad (LOLK), Thursday, 12 August 2010 20:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
fwiw i love this fuzzy bastards
― caek boss (latebloomer), Thursday, 12 August 2010 20:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
those*
haw
somebody's got a new user name
― caek boss (latebloomer), Thursday, 12 August 2010 20:57 (2 years ago) Permalink
yeah i mean i still love the original yub nub ending and all but... what if?
― grateful dad (LOLK), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
it would have been cooler no doubt!
― caek boss (latebloomer), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
I'm telling you, they could have fixed everything by having the Ewoks eat the Stormtroopers
― How could you forget the crazy hooker? (HI DERE), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
― ('_') (omar little), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
THE END
― caek boss (latebloomer), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
I was very distracted by the fly on dude's forehead
― How could you forget the crazy hooker? (HI DERE), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah I always kind of suspected he made up that whole "It's supposed to be 9 movies" after they realized they could make a killing on these films.
― Beach Pomade (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
Nice read. Kurtz's ending doesn't sound GREAT to be honest - - I mean, what's the point of rescuing Han and then having him die, beyond the general idea that the rogue's arc of redemption must end in self-sacrifice? Totally agreed about the redundant Death Star though....could they just not come up with anything else?
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 12 August 2010 21:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
I always assumed that they did, since a) they were fully prepared to eat Han, Luke and Chewie, and b) those stormtrooper helmets being used as rototoms came from SOMEplace.
― a mix of music (Lionel Ritchie) and kicks (my tongue) (Phil D.), Friday, 13 August 2010 00:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
maybe a Death Cafe or a Death Water Park
― plate of dinosaurs (San Te), Friday, 13 August 2010 00:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
That reminded me of another Kurtz interview, post-Phantom Menace. He hasn't changed his tune.
http://www.filmthreat.com/interviews/8/
― Millsner, Friday, 13 August 2010 17:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
― piscesx, Saturday, 14 August 2010 15:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
i heard George Lucas raped a koala once
― plate of dinosaurs (San Te), Saturday, 14 August 2010 15:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
No that was an E-wok
― Evan, Saturday, 14 August 2010 16:41 (2 years ago) Permalink
Or, whatever.
― Evan, Saturday, 14 August 2010 16:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
Favorite bit of the Clones review: explaining how casting Samuel L. Jackson was a 100% cynical bait-and-switch to get black people into theaters.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 12:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
What about Billy Dee Williams then?
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 13:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
Billy Dee Williams isn't a bait-and-switch - - - what exactly was Williams's reputation at the time that he could be cynically cashed-in upon? I get the complaint with Samuel L. Jackson, basically you're expecting this ultimate Jedi badass, with some taut, just-barely-controlled anger fueling the delivery of classic lines. Instead you get a monkish, dowdy cipher. To be fair, most of the characters are ciphers, and I'm not sure I want to start singing the praises of typecasting, but certainly when I heard Samuel L. Jackson was going to be in Star Wars, it got me excited based on things that ultimately were not there in the film.
The little promo clip dude excerpts with Jackson talking about how they're some awesome action and fighting in this movie does seem a little bit calculated, I have to say.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 15:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Louis CK BK ANYBODYK (lpz), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 17:41 (2 years ago) Permalink
i've been thinking more about these prequels, about how it was supposedly impossible to make a movie about war that didn't fetishize it?I think Lucas might have actually achieved the impossible. I can't imagine any kid watching these having any desire to participate in warfare, or at least not with any help from these movies.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 18:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
Just want to add: Again, not putting the original version on the new Blu-ray. Not that I expected him to, but just another little thing that annoys me.
― Spencer Chow, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 18:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
this is a huge thing that enrages me iirc
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 18:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
u mean pre-cgi theatrical version? he'll never do that cuz hes a delusional p.o.s.
― am0n, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
he should be hanged for his crimes too imo
― am0n, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
he'll die a martyr for peace!
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:05 (2 years ago) Permalink
Why would black people need Sam Jackson in a film that already has Jar Jar.
― no gut busting joke can change history (polyphonic), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
Haha he makes a joke about that in the review. Something like, "When I think of the people who would never want to see this..." (clip of Jar Jar) "...I think of black people."
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, August 10, 2010 2:20 AM
― am0n, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
And yeah, Billy Dee was a major character, who actually did and said things that were not completely stilted and dull.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
Williams responded indifferently to the criticism of his appearances in the liquor commercials. When questioned about his appearances he was quoted as saying, "I drink, you drink. Hell, if marijuana was legal, I'd appear in a commercial for that too."
― am0n, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
well the prequels are pretty equal opportunity when it comes to stilted and dull.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:18 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp Who's the real bad assssss?
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
And in terms of not being a major character. Even the major characters aren't very major.
Apart from the really weird, very sick "mass murderer" stuff thrown in there, I really do recommend this guys breakdown of the prequels. He's astute. His review of Avatar is good, too.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
He especially loves to break down the monetary calculations that go into making movies huge movies like these, and how effective and/or appalling the filmmakers are toward these ends.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
This is the Sam Jackson part:
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 19:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
The more I think on it, the more I'm baffled by the mass murderer thing running through all these reviews. Why would someone as smart as this go that route? I imagine a late night meeting in someone's living room.
"I want to be a character of some kind. Have a persona, not just review these movies. That way we can work some of our little side projects as videocam-owning-people into the reviews.""Well, what did you have in mind?""Hmm. How about, I torture and kill women?"
You'd think his friends would have shouted him down at this point.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
be fair, no one would have given it a fair shake if instead of a mumbling psychopath it was kevin smith doing it.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
What makes you think he has friends.
― funky house skeptic (polyphonic), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
in all honesty i prefer this persona to the zero punctuation guy and um.. armond white i suppose.really, the only people giving opinions on youtube i could stand was that elderly couple that gave film reviews.there is no way out of the inherent narcissism of such a venture, so why not make a psycho-killer persona to deflect it?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp There are other people in his videos, for one thing.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
ya i think it is so dumb its funny, wtv
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
I think it's pretty squicky.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
They also act as an excuse to break every once in awhile -- they're pretty long.Also, if you've seen similarly styled videos where the dude isn't adopting a schtick, but it's just them narrating, they come off as pretty smart-alecky.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
I know, but why THIS gimmick?
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
The crimes of Red Letter Media
maybe he's going for a "lucas is so manifestly terrible that even a deranged mumblecore killer can lucidly outline how" sort of thing?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 20:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
I have to say, my sensibilities might be jaded from a lifetime of brutal, misanthropic and malevolent cinema, but I find the "serial killer" sections objectionable not because they're offensive but because they're boring, unfunny, and predictable. But the voice is 100% essential.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 22:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
Agree about the voice.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
ok it might take awhile but i'd be up for splicing the horror-comedy sketches out of one of these reviews and uploading them to youtube to see if they hold up as well without them. which one of these would you guys stand to watch again... for science?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
would watch
― "SEX" drought, 2 wisks (zorn_bond.mp3), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
you know i can think of no cogent defense for the "serial killer" parts and yet somehow... i think they're good...?
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
i mean it just kind of pre-empts the any flack you might get for doing a 70-minute phantom menace review pretty neatly
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
Why not 60 minutes without rape and murder?
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
cause the rape and murder breaks up the montony, maaaan
― "SEX" drought, 2 wisks (zorn_bond.mp3), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
A lesson Lucas could have learned, eh?
― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
As Yoda would say: Circles, we go in.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
You know that episode where Picard thinks he's dead and Q offers him a chance to fix it so he doesn't pull a barfight with a 7-foot warthog in his youth? So he does it because obviously that's a stupid, regretful thing worth fixing, but it wrecks the rest of his life, and he ends up a loser ensign instead of Captain of the Enterprise?
I think that's what these horror-com sketches are to this. Let me know which of the reviews you want the sketches excised from, and we'll see if that's the case.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
You're Q! That's awesome!
― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
Q was an idiot.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
Don't take me there, for real.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
Everyone can be Q now with Q...uicktime
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
irl lol
― "SEX" drought, 2 wisks (zorn_bond.mp3), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
can u edit natively in whatever codec youtubez uses or are you going to have recompress it again and make it look even worse
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
I think iMovie will edit an m4v.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
And if not, you can save "up" from Quicktime, to an unnecessary bitrate, and encode in .mov, and then edit down from there. Yeah, it'll be lossy, but less so.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
RIP
― the milagro-beanfield war criminal (s1ocki), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
youtube apparently lets you download the original file or something close to it.
Did he do one for Indy 4? I'd be more keen to bowdlerizing one I haven't seen yet.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:47 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp Ha! Exactly.
― kenan, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
I'm amazed you guys can even sit through this much commentary about movies that are so bad. these youtubes are SO LONG
― what's up, ugly girls? (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
hey while you're editing it can you change it so one of those girls in the basement shoots him first, i think that would make his actions more sympathetic
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 September 2010 23:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, but two things. First, he loves the original movies, and obviously movies in general, and understands their inner guts, and feels he needs to point out precisely how and why the prequels are SO bad. Because they are SO bad. Second, he's funny and entertaining. Mostly. But a woman tied up in a basement and begging for a glass of water is not very funny. Maybe I'm one of of those guys who doesn't get internet irony. Litigate against me, if you think that's necessary.
― kenan, Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
the psycho thing is there to defuse the clearly psychotic endeavor of putting up a ridiculously long critique of the star wars prequels. it's not funny (and when it goes on longer than 5 seconds it's really really bad) but it's not exactly like when russ meyer movies just suddenly go 'btw RAPE'S HILARIOUS'.
― balls, Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
Where's Kate to rant about how disgusting this is? Oh, right.
― kenan, Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
That whole schtick did irritate me. IIRC in later ones those bits just go on *longer* with more and more footage of crying women in his basement. It's made less disgusting by the fact that the women are really terrible actresses & consequently there's no actual feeling of duress. Also, it just has this feeling of having to drive your younger brother & his friends around all day while they have grossout competitions to make each other laugh. It's hard to take seriously, but it's also annoying.
I wish he would have just stuck to the jokes about pizza roles, which I actually thought were funny.
― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
I mean pizza rolls.
― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
It wasn't like *trigger alert* or anything though, it was just poorly executed joking.
― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Thursday, 23 September 2010 00:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, the pizza roll thing is def. better.
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 September 2010 01:12 (2 years ago) Permalink
And I think this is a sort of generalizable problem where the things I find entertaining in internet videos that deconstruct pop culture are actually not what the target audience leaps for. Like it's the same as how Angry Video Game Nerd is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy funnier when he's just playing the game and getting deep into the minutia of why it doesn't work and isn't fun, rather than doing toilet jokes and stringing swears together.
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 September 2010 01:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucasfilm Ltd. announced today that the live-action Star Wars Saga will be converted to 3D! There are few movies that lend themselves more perfectly to 3D; from the Death Star trench run to the Tatooine Podrace, the Star Wars Saga has always delivered an entertainment experience that is completely immersive. Presented by Twentieth Century Fox and Lucasfilm Ltd., the cutting edge conversion will take that immersion to the next thrilling level, with Industrial Light & Magic supervising the project. Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace is expected to be released theatrically in 2012. A release date has not yet been determined. "Getting good results on a stereo conversion is a matter of taking the time and getting it right," said John Knoll, Visual Effects Supervisor for Industrial Light & Magic. "It takes a critical and artistic eye along with an incredible attention to detail to be successful. It is not something that you can rush if you want to expect good results. For Star Wars we will take our time, applying everything we know both aesthetically and technically to bring audiences a fantastic new Star Wars experience."
"Getting good results on a stereo conversion is a matter of taking the time and getting it right," said John Knoll, Visual Effects Supervisor for Industrial Light & Magic. "It takes a critical and artistic eye along with an incredible attention to detail to be successful. It is not something that you can rush if you want to expect good results. For Star Wars we will take our time, applying everything we know both aesthetically and technically to bring audiences a fantastic new Star Wars experience."
― James Mitchell, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
at this point there's really nothing that can be done to ruin star wars further than it already has been. 3-D is way less offensive than shitty tacked-on cgi. but who the fuck would wants to see the phantom menace again?
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
or indeed at all
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
i think everyone should be made to see it, just to spread the pain around
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
Maybe as well as 3D, Lucas could also revive Smell-O-Vision, so that the stench of manure could waft through the cinema.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
literally! remember that scene where Jar Jar's steps in some shit? or when the space camel farts in his face?
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
i can't un-remember that. the world must suffer.
Han shat first...
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
those scenes were actually in the Phantom Menace, btw
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
Jedi robes are brown for a reason. Helps hide embarrassing stains.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
special edition jokes right at the beginning of this:http://www.gametrailers.com/video/angry-video-screwattack/703826
― my sex drew back into itself tight and dry (abanana), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 12:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
― latebloomer, Wednesday, September 29, 2010 8:22 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, September 29, 2010 8:23 AM (58 minutes ago) Bookmark
i think dr morbius was actually the only human being who liked this movie
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
releasing them one by one *annualy* the press releases seem to be saying? that can't be right can it? i mean who's going to give a shit for that first 3 years?
― piscesx, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
I loved Simon Pegg's tweet this morning about this:
"Watching TPM in 3D would be like the car actually crashing into your face as opposed to just unfolding before your eyes."
― he's always been a bit of an anti-climb Max (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
haha
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
um... I liked it (except for Jar-Jar)
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:45 (2 years ago) Permalink
morbius is your sock?
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
okay now THAT would be some shit
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
but anyway, look upthread!
lol I am the only person here who doesn't hate these movies― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:58 PM
― suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 2:58 PM
could be a forgery
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
I liked it too, for the most part. (And so did Ebert!)
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
sock, sock, sock
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:51 (2 years ago) Permalink
My favorite thing about Ebert's review was that he pretty much called ppl out with "lol u jaded"
If it were the first "Star Wars" movie, "The Phantom Menace" would be hailed as a visionary breakthrough. But this is the fourth movie of the famous series, and we think we know the territory; many of the early reviews have been blase, paying lip service to the visuals and wondering why the characters aren't better developed. How quickly do we grow accustomed to wonders. I am reminded of the Isaac Asimov story "Nightfall," about the planet where the stars were visible only once in a thousand years. So awesome was the sight that it drove men mad. We who can see the stars every night glance up casually at the cosmos and then quickly down again, searching for a Dairy Queen.
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19990517/REVIEWS/905170301/1023
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
man The Phantom Empire would have rocked if the Separatists had split from the Republic over ice cream.
― raging hetero lifechill (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
yeesh
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
TS: technical breakthroughs vs. watchable movies.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
And shame on Roger Ebert for lauding visuals over story and characters. He KNOWS better.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
If it were the first "Star Wars" movie, "The Phantom Menace" would be hailed as a visionary breakthrough.
what the hell does that mean? sure TPM released 20 years earlier would have BLOWN PEOPLE'S FUCKING MINDS. But by 1999 cgi-heavy sci-fi action flicks were nothing new, and in its own time and place it was clearly ponderous cruddy over-engineered under-written nonsense.
― ledge, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:57 (2 years ago) Permalink
Anyone calling these movies "unwatchable" hasn't seen a truly unwatchable movie, like Terminator: Salvation or The Bounty Hunter.
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 13:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
most popular unwatchable film is The Dark Knight.
― raging hetero lifechill (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
Oh bullshit. The prequels are complete garbage.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
i have seen plenty of unwatchable films in my day sir
and this film is unwatchable
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
Well, my work here is done. (claps dust off hands, strides away whistling)
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
I've seen TPM maybe 3 or 4 times now, and I still couldn't tell you the story. The trade federation stuff was all needlessly complex and bafflingly makes no sense at all. The entire plot of that movie is impenetrable. Jar-Jar aside, I hate how all the aliens speak English with silly accents instead of made up space talk w subtitles. Also hate the actor playing Anakin; he should've been cast as a guest role in a 30 min sitcom. But it's all moot because Jar-Jar pretty much voids the entire movie as soon as he enters.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
Nah, he's a sucker for that kind of thing in the sci-fi realm. He grants the same latitude to "Metropolis" and "Dark City," e.g. (The latter of which he did DVD commentary for.)
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:06 (2 years ago) Permalink
In fact, I'm pretty sure he named "Dark City" his favorite of 1998, and his review starts: ``Dark City'' by Alex Proyas is a great visionary achievement, a film so original and exciting, it stirred my imagination like ``Metropolis'' and ``2001: A Space Odyssey.'' If it is true, as the German director Werner Herzog believes, that we live in an age starved of new images, then ``Dark City'' is a film to nourish us. Not a story so much as an experience, it is a triumph of art direction, set design, cinematography, special effects--and imagination
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
Tbh I would permaban
How the hell can you not know the story if you've seen it 4 or 5 times? It's not even remotely complicated.
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lol that first bit shouldn't be there
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
No, it makes sense in context.
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
I like Dark City, but I never understood the sloppy handjob that Ebert gave it. It's a three-star affair.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:18 (2 years ago) Permalink
haha freudian slip there dan
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
it's a two-starrer at BEST.
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, September 29, 2010 10:08 AM (13 minutes ago) Bookmark
no but it is so painfully boring and shitty the brain actively rejects it
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp I like the story. It's a little silly, but I, like Ebert, was impressed when I realized that it was not Earth at all.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace is expected to be released theatrically in 2012
hopefully this is scheduled to be released AFTER the world ends in 2012
― tUrD-yArDs - BiRd-SHiTs (diamonddave85), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
December 25, 2012 -- Just in time for post-apocalyptic Xmas.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
"I didn't care enough about the plot to pay attention to it" is a very different criticism from "The plot is so complicated and impenetrable that I can't tell you what happens"; I could understand someone saying the latter if we were talking about "Eraserhead" but this is a fucking Star Wars movie!
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
"released theatrically" - it will be accompanied by a drumroll and a loud bang of confetti
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
"Complicated and impenetrable" is different still from "Doesn't make a lick of sense."
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
It's not that I don't understand what's SUPPOSED to be going on, it's that what's supposed to be going on is thinly motivated and often arbitrary, in service of getting to the next big set piece.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 14:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
Can you relay the plot to me, with regards to the trade federation, the gungans, who is on what side, who those two alien ambassadors were at the beginning, etc. etc. without referring to wikipedia?
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, i mean, sitting down and watching it, im sure it isn't that complicated, but you forget all of it the minute the movie ends because you care NOT AT ALL what happens.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:11 (2 years ago) Permalink
Without the aid of Wikipedia:
The Trade Federation are blockading Naboo because of something. The Jedi go to sort it out. They ponce around for a bit, meet Jar Jar then leave with the princess. Their spaceship breaks down on way back and they have to stop on Tattoine to find a spare part. They meet Anakin and take him with them, and they have a fight with Darth Maul there for some reason as well. Also there is a very loud and confusing sport event. They get back to Coruscant, then turn around again and go straight back to Naboo after talking to the Jedi council about some stuff I can't remember. Jar Jar persuades his people to join the fight against the Trade Federation, and there is a big battle. Darth Maul shows up again and kills Qui-Gon, then Obi Wan kills him. Anakin blows up one of the Federation's ships by mistake, and the battle droids all stop working and the blockade is lifted. Obi Wan decides to train Anakin, despite Yoda warning him not to. The End.
― rhythm fixated member (chap), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp I think I have the basics, yeah. There's a fight going on about tariffs on intergalactic trade. The Galactic Senate has become a powerless UN-like body, once ruling the galaxy, but now totally limp. The Trade Federation, who for some reason how its own military, puts up a blockade around Naboo, preventing supplies from moving in or out, just to prove a pissy point. This is bad for Naboo. Senator Palpatine sees opportunity in this tense situation, and conspires to make the situation worse, to make the Supreme Chancellor look even more incompetent than he already is, and have himself installed in his place.
Right?
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
Bravo sirs!
― Neil S, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
I don't think I could do the same for Attack of the Clones.
― rhythm fixated member (chap), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
my eyes glazed over even trying to read that paragraph
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
How the hell can you not know the story if you've seen it 4 or 5 times?
I apologize if this was already addressed, but why would you see this movie 4 or 5 times?
― da croupier, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
guys, look away
― Gene Shalit in a Child's Sailor Hat (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
Notice I didn;t mention the Jedis in my plot synopsis, because nothing they do seems to have any significance whatsoever. The Gungans are there apparently to be recruited as soldiers, even though the Gungan leader is adamant about how the fight won't affect them either way. Obi Wan says something about everything effecting everyone else, except that the Gungans live in the "planet core" (which I guess is made of water?) and the people on Naboo seem to have no contact with them at all, whatsoever. So the Gungans are really, really easily persuaded to fight and die against their interests, apparently.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
to clarify my question, why would you repeatedly see a movie you cared so little about the plot evaporated from your mind the second after you saw it? or was the amnesia THAT strong?
― da croupier, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
Ok, I've seen it twice, then watched part of The Phantom Edit, then watched the rifftrax once twice.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
xp Same reason to watch the Zapruder film over and over. WHAT HAPPENED HERE?
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
Something died violently, and I need to know how and why.
'Repeatedly' being in the course of 10 years.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
I'm sure I've only sat through the whole thing once.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:41 (2 years ago) Permalink
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 15:22 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
slock1 OTM
― beef lamp (stevie), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 16:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
"Now it's R2-3D and 3D-PO as George Lucas green lights mega Star Wars conversion"http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1316182/George-Lucas-green-lights-mega-Star-Wars-3D-conversion.html
Maybe more at home on the Mail mail thread
― not_goodwin, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 16:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
Not unless the DM claims that Jawas are illegal immigrants.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 16:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
Mail mail?
Sorry, hate mail, duh!
― not_goodwin, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
Get ready for HAN TRIO and PRINCESS THREEYA as LUCAS creates NEW DIMENSION for STAR FLICKS
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
Would think Attack of the Clones & Revenge of the Sith would be the easiest to do, since the sets are all CGI anyways, all they need to do is find the original files and put it 2nd camera & re-render. With improved computer technology, render times for even the most complicated scenes should be drastically shorter than originally.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:11 (2 years ago) Permalink
Obi Wan Kenobthree
LOOK skywalker
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
― kenan, Wednesday, September 29, 2010 1:56 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark
He's ALWAYS done that. He gave Spawn, a movie that's arguably even worse than the Phantom Menace (and has even worse effects), three and a half stars.
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, I guess he does give a multipass to all things comic-book-ish.
― kenan, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
― If Airplanes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport (s1ocki), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
"Use the Force 3D goggles"
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
C3-DO
― latebloomer, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 17:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
some points in favor of dark city:kiefer is pretty good as the nerdit never inspired any fanfiction (i have this theory that fanfiction is a kind of autoimmune response by an audience spurred by intrinsic defects in the source material [this would be supported if we could count up the number of prequel fanfics vs. original trilogy])
i can't think of any in favor of spawn.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
I never watched "The Cell" but I'm pretty sure it didn't deserve the four stars Ebert gave it.
― funky house skeptic (polyphonic), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
I kind of tuned out the rest of the movie, but this scene is worth 4 stars!
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:15 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Cell reminded me of a hundred-minute version of Madonna's "Nothing Really Matters"
― raging hetero lifechill (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
that is the meanest thing I've ever seen written about The Cell
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
ha - I'm pretty sure it isn't.
― raging hetero lifechill (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
"scena del cavallo"
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
"but this scene is worth 4 stars!"what i meant was 'this scene is worth HORSE stars!'
i can't think of a single scene in star wars that's worth 3D-izing more than a cross-sectioned horse.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:52 (2 years ago) Permalink
^^^ list thread
― Monkeys? Um, no. (HI DERE), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
he should make jar jar 3-d and keep everything else in 2-d
― ('_') (omar little), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 18:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
I wonder if this is happening because someone complained the characters in the prequels "were two-dimensional" and Lucas got confused.
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
calling them two-dimensional is being generous
― pro bono toilet snaking (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:22 (1 year ago)
Well now Lucas can remake the films so that there's a million things flying around in the foreground right in front of your face.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
STAR WARS 3-D: THEY FLY @ U FACE
― a seminar on ass play for kids or something (Phil D.), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
Especially that scene with the shapeshifter assassin and Obi-Wan is hanging onto that flying droid and Anakin is chasing after them. You know that scene is just going to be five minutes of shit and wacky aliens in flying clown cars careering towards you constantly.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
I hope we'll be able to smell Watto's burps.
― funky house skeptic (polyphonic), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:45 (2 years ago) Permalink
And Jabba's farts!
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 29 September 2010 20:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
George Lucas does not exist - he never did. He is manage by a robo-star in manner of #2536. He will soon introduce something for you - THE CHOMPING DUCK GETS HIS FATTY OUT FOR VADAR
― Latham Green, Wednesday, 29 September 2010 21:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
can this be the thread where we just recycle complaints from red letter media? because seriously why did the shape-shifting assassin need to hide its face with a veil.
― it sucks and you all love something that sucks (reddening), Thursday, 30 September 2010 02:18 (2 years ago) Permalink
If the assassin was shape-shifting why didnt it just become Padame and kill itself?
― Latham Green, Thursday, 30 September 2010 02:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
The senate chamber will look pretty dope, tho.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 30 September 2010 04:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
truu dat!
― Latham Green, Thursday, 30 September 2010 22:05 (2 years ago) Permalink
This pretty much sums up the prequels:
― Princess TamTam, Sunday, 24 October 2010 08:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
By the way, the Red Letter Media guy's Star Trek reviews are hilarious, maybe better than the SW ones (depending on whether or not you're a Trek fan)
― Princess TamTam, Sunday, 24 October 2010 08:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucas now forced to shill for PC World, just to make a bit of money.
― like an ant to a crumb (DavidM), Sunday, 24 October 2010 18:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
(actually it's quite well made, and feels old school Star Wars-y. I like the scene wipes, or whatever they're called. Despite that, it still somehow leaves a bad taste)
― like an ant to a crumb (DavidM), Sunday, 24 October 2010 18:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
That's going to be in the 3D version of ANH. The inside of the Jawa transport is going to look like a branch of PC World.
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 27 October 2010 08:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
Totally always wished they had made Star Wars graphic adventures back in the day. Those two based on Indiana Jones were great. The Fate Of Atlantis was 1000x better than the new movie too....
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 27 October 2010 18:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
http://www.redlettermedia.com/sith.html
the episode 3 review is finally up... 2 hours long!
― Princess TamTam, Sunday, 2 January 2011 19:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
but it just flies by!
― we could play games, idk (ledge), Sunday, 2 January 2011 21:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yes, it does. Pretty good, but not as good as the ep 2 review. Really like how he pointed out certain things that were spoiled because of the over-reliance on green screen, like Obi-Wan's non-reaction at a four-armed robot unsheathing multiple lightsabers right in front of his face. Also the bit about how unimaginatively the talking scenes were shot.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 3 January 2011 17:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah I thought that bit was pretty illuminating.
― WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Monday, 3 January 2011 18:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
I had a dream last night that Peter Jackson decided to do Lucas-style re-releases of all the LOTR movies that included new footage of new characters, a corsair played by Nic Cage in an eyepatch and an evil witch played by Andie McDowell.
― assorted curses (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 3 January 2011 18:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
a corsair played by Nic Cage in an eyepatch
I would watch a film about this.
― A brownish area with points (chap), Monday, 3 January 2011 18:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
I think that Star Wars III review (review!?) is tremendous - it took me an age to watch but then really made me think. Real insight, comparative analysis and a passion for the original pictures, as well as laughs and some OTT maybe self-publicizing digressions.
― the pinefox, Monday, 3 January 2011 19:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
i like this series. baby han solol!
but i think the original trilogy films have a lot of shit in them too. i don't like he holds them up as great filmmaking.
― a nan, a bal, an anal ― (abanana), Monday, 3 January 2011 19:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
"evil witch played by Andie McDowell"
there's this movie with a bond girl who looks just like andie mcdowell playing some flying witch called her majesty's secret elements or something like that.
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 3 January 2011 19:51 (2 years ago) Permalink
is there really a baby Han Solo in the prequels? how did that work
― assorted curses (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, 3 January 2011 19:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
its a joke in the video shakey
"even ray charles could see that coming... and he doesn't know anything about Star Wars!"
― Princess TamTam, Monday, 3 January 2011 20:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
LOL @ that one!
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 3 January 2011 20:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
love when he asks 'is it something that should've been done' about a story element and then answers with the clip of vader screaming NOOOOOO
― Princess TamTam, Monday, 3 January 2011 20:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
I think what's great about these is how much it digs past the superficial reasons I thought these movies sucked and really gets into the mechanics of it - - - it's like a master's course in the ways and means of dullness. The discussion of the limitations created by green screen and the incredibly lazy blocking is soooooooooooo OTM.
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 04:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
Totally agree, the amazing thing is they make you realize that the movies are even worse than you had previously thought. It illuminates The sheer totality of their crapness
― Number None, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 04:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
it isn't specifically a focal point of the video, but it reminded me of how drama-free a giant war between soulless, faceless clones and robots is. Couldn't they have made one side humans? Couldn't they have made the robots fearsome?
― Matt Armstrong, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 04:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah really, the sheer lameness of what "the clone wars" turned out to be is a big problem, the EPIC BACKDROP for the character story is totally devoid of any interest whatsoever.
― Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 05:06 (2 years ago) Permalink
Dude who does RedLetterMedia really should get his own TV show. In the vein of MST3K, maybe.
― heh (kelpolaris), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 05:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
is this one as rapey as the others? there isn't really anything for me to do at work but you know if it is p rapey i won't get away with watching it.
― irish xmas caek, get that marzipan inta ya (a hoy hoy), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 09:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
no
― Princess TamTam, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 10:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
the key is he's not just a star wars fanboy whose childhood has been crushed by lucas's foibles - he also understands script and story, and how they work, and that lucas's skills in these areas have painfully eroded between trilogies.
― this guy ☜ (stevie), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 10:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
The funny thing is that after the first two prequels, which were total shit, the third one at the time seemed tolerable. But this epic takedown reveals just how wrong I was.
― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 13:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
and that lucas's skills in these areas have painfully eroded between trilogies.
Lucas' script and story skills really not so prevalent in the first trilogy, tbh
― assorted curses (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
the first star wars tells a pretty compelling story
― Princess TamTam, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
yeah and Lucas didn't write the other two (at least, not by himself)
― assorted curses (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
this is super interesting but i think the guy is just cacked out by now. there is only so many ways to say that lucas sucks at story telling, his cgi, fight scenes and lack of acting (not the same as bad acting), stilted dialogue, bad plot points etc.
― irish xmas caek, get that marzipan inta ya (a hoy hoy), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:31 (2 years ago) Permalink
If you read the first Star Wars draft, it's dreadful, totally lacking in charm, structure, characters, emotion, plausibility. The second draft is not much better, or the third... and then somehow he nails it. So I don't think his skills have painfully eroded, I think he just got lucky once (and had enough momentum or enough of the rest of the story already crafted to carry the sequels).
― we could play games, idk (ledge), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
gary kurtz tends to get a lot of credit for reigning in lucas' worst impulses on the first two movies
― Princess TamTam, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
if only general kurtz had as much influence on post-first two movies on lucas.
― irish xmas caek, get that marzipan inta ya (a hoy hoy), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
the quotes from Lucas' drafts of the Star Wars script in Easy Riders, Raging Bulls are HILARIOUS
― assorted curses (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
Especially to Australians. "The Bogan! The Bogan!"
― we could play games, idk (ledge), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 16:41 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Obi-Wan riding the giant lizard moment is what tipped me off.
Also, I love how he builds up all this evidence that Lucas basically wrote this shit in a weekend and didn't bother to even re-watch the original trilogy. It's really so haphazard the way he tries to connect everything. Anakin needlessly going back to save that one clone to prove he's a good guy. Obi-Wan constantly referring to these other fun and exciting offscreen adventures they have together where they save each others lives. Then how they put young Anakin in at the end of ROTJ and now Luke somehow knows how Anakin looked when he was 25 rather than the man he actually saw.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
all those repeated clips of lucas at the ranch with all the sycophants clapping and smiling whenever he said anything were super creepy and really illuminating.
― goole, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:06 (2 years ago) Permalink
Also, yeah, lots of sitting on couches in those prequels.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
i wonder who would win the super creepy sycophant ranch contest between george lucas and david lynch.
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
i dont think lynch lives on a ranch
― Princess TamTam, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
the loser would be the salad
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
it's a compound of some type, according to the david foster wallace article. and there's livestock, too, but they are rotting on lynch's estate.
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 17:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
― goole, Wednesday, July 15, 2009 12:56 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark
― goole, Tuesday, November 17, 2009 10:40 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark
goddammit those redletter vids just have me thinking about this bullshit all over again. fuckin lucas.
― goole, Tuesday, 4 January 2011 19:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
I still think the only horrible things in the prequels are Jar-Jar in Ep 1. Anakin/Padme doe-eyes in Ep 2 and Anakin's wholly unbelievable conversion to the Dark Side in Ep 3.
Somehow, even though these are all three massively important lynchpins to the movies in question, I still enjoy all of them and will watch them if stumble across them on cable.
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 19:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
Wasn't there a rumor at some point that N'Sync would be in one of these movies? I think that was when my Spidey sense started tingling.
― I Am Kurious Assange (polyphonic), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 19:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/%27N_Sync
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Tuesday, 4 January 2011 19:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
i admire these reviews (dumb humor notwithstanding) because i think it is really, really hard to explain why something is bad while staying within its own terms.
― ryan, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 00:52 (2 years ago) Permalink
^^^^Agreed. And I don't think he's necessarily saying the originals are great films per se, just great within their own terms, which I think they are on the whole.
― A brownish area with points (chap), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 01:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah--when i finally saw THX118 a few years ago, I was amazed at how someone could have done that (it wasn't flawless, but it was really interesting and mostly ace) and the first Star Wars could have deteriorated so dramatically.
― buildings with goats on the roof (James Morrison), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 08:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
agree with all of this. the first star wars flick is a magnificent movie, one of the best and most interesting/rewarding fantasy epics ever made, but it's really damn hard to articulate exactly why it's so great, especially in relation to the radically diminished returns offered by the return of the jedi and the prequels. (i mean, i could try, but this doesn't seem the place.)
the tragedy of lucas' fall isn't how far he wound up from what initially made him great, but the fact that he didn't move at all. the differences between what initially worked and eventually didn't are so subtle as to be all but inarticulable. but unmistakable for that. as ryan says, lucas always stayed true to his own terms, to the basic logic and aesthetics of the universe he'd created. but at the same time, he betrayed them totally, betrayed them perhaps even by his fealty.
― carles marx (contenderizer), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
the first one was made in the 70s. it feels like a 70s movie. the haircuts, the attitudes. the others weren't. QED
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
okay, thanks for simplifying it. yes. tracer otm. luke with windblown 70s hair above the adobe ruin of his (faux) parents' dream.
― carles marx (contenderizer), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:11 (2 years ago) Permalink
those Red Letter reviews are amazing. the whole walking,talking/ bad framing section in part 3 is way better at articulating what's wrong with the prequels than anything else i've ever seen or read. who is this guy? does he really speak like that?
― piscesx, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
of course not
― Princess TamTam, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
a quick look at their website makes it seem like a group. plus if someone was to do all that themselves they would have to be fucking psychotic (not out the question obv)
― "jobs" (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:41 (2 years ago) Permalink
Technically, the second one was made in the 70s too, its filming was finished in September 1979.
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
2nd is still pretty goddam AOK, fwiw
― carles marx (contenderizer), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 10:45 (2 years ago) Permalink
those Red Letter reviews are amazing. the whole walking,talking/ bad framing section in part 3 is way better at articulating what's wrong with the prequels than anything else i've ever seen or read.
otm. i'd love to see more long-form movie reviews like this---it's very rare in a written review to get the kind of close-reading of craft that the red letter guys got into. can't really imagine many other films that would warrant this obsessive treatment, though.
― ullr saves (gbx), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 15:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
i told a friend who wanted to learn how to write to watch it.
― "jobs" (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 15:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Star Trek (2009) review is really good, too, since he/they actually liked the movie. And he explicitly compares it to both OT and PT Star Wars to demonstrate what it got right that the prequels got wrong. (ALthough when it come's to the prequels, I'm pretty firmly in Dan's camp, here.)
― children with wasting diseases (Phil D.), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 15:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 18:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
i must watch the Star Trek review one. Star Tek 09 is an all-time classic example of taking something old and making it better, i was freaking blown away by it. Dr Who, Star Wars, Superman Returns, that recent good BBC Sherlock thing, all the endless horror remakes etc.. all of them are bloody rubbish in comparison.
― piscesx, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 18:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
Well I wouldn't get that carried away about it, but it was a great reboot. Superman Returns wasn't much cop, so I'll give you that one.
― Chewshabadoo, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 19:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
This Red Letter guy is brilliant, because as easy as it is to say these movies are bad, he may be the only person I've encountered to peg just why these movies suck, and not just that theysuck. And yeah, the Star Trek 09 review is pretty vital, too, because it's a movie he likes but isn't beyond dissecting as a perfectly assembled product, which again goes back to his problem with the prequels - namely that they're poorly assembled products. Star Trek turns out to be a great point of comparison (just like Citizen Kane in the Sith review, which he concedes is unfair but still smartly knows how to employ as a useful reference).
― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
tbh I really can't imagine watching these reviews based on the descriptions here
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
u should deffo skip these vids if you hate funny things
― Princess TamTam, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
I must admit, they do provide satisfying closure to the whole ordeal.
― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
they are hilarious and insightful and surprisingly dont seem too long but they are still reviews of a movie.
― "jobs" (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
how can they not seem too long when they are JUST AS LONG AS THE MOVIE BEING REVIEWED
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
because they're way more interesting than the actual movie (which is a piece of shit btw)?
― ullr saves (gbx), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 22:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
^^^^^^^
― "jobs" (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
like dude i've seen other movies as long as ep3 that didn't seem too long because you know they were ~actually good~
― ullr saves (gbx), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:00 (2 years ago) Permalink
ultimately, and keep in mind I spend large chunks of my work day posting here, I think my time is too precious to spend on multiple hours of someone dissecting movies I find enjoyable and inconsequential
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
I don't really have that many NERDS! moments but it seems like they're all triggered by ILX these days
― Indolence Mission (DJP), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
haha dude my NERDS! moments are exclusively thanks to ilx
― ullr saves (gbx), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
i find these reviews legitimately entertaining and dont seem too long because they're smart! (minus the serial killer sub-plot...)
i think the cross-cutting between Yoda's monologue on the force and the systematic contradictions of it in the prequels is sort of a high water mark for the whole series of reviews.
― ryan, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:07 (2 years ago) Permalink
What makes these so great is not just that they're entertaining but that they're perceptive. You may think you know why you don't like these movies, but man, this guy offers a very educational breakdown that details stuff you may not have even noticed. Like, not mistakes or continuity issues, but good ol' film school 101 stuff that, tbh, will likely now affect not just how I watch certain films but how I critique them. Blocking, framing, writing, editing, the whole deal. And then chase it down with the Star Trek '09 review to get an idea how two very similar Hollywood productions can diverge so wildly when it comes to results.
― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
the reviews dpn't ever even mention utility data, it's tragic
― Stop Non-Erotic Cabaret (Abbbottt), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
I dunno -- there's another series of nerd reviews by some anonymous kid that seems about as insightful, but the fact that the kid doesn't go to the effort of peppering it with serial killer jokes is what makes it fall flat.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
also the kid sounds like the schaudenfreude kid from king of the hill + comic book guy.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
I think the editing is the secret star of these videos. They do a good job of keeping your visual interest for TWO HOURS. Hard to do.
― I Am Kurious Assange (polyphonic), Wednesday, 5 January 2011 23:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
iirc the ep 1 one is broken into ten minute chunks and the first one ends with the interviews with people describing characters from the original trilogy, then the new ones. It's a great moment and probably a good place to start if you're wary of devoting precious unrecoverable hours of your life to such a seemingly pointless and nerdy enterprise.
― nanoflymo (ledge), Thursday, 6 January 2011 00:19 (2 years ago) Permalink
I kind of wish the guy would do this for global warming deniers, because he does way more entertaining and effective lawyering than say, al gore
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 6 January 2011 00:21 (2 years ago) Permalink
Michael Moore already does the mumbling "Then the President followed through on it... oh wait. Yeah... Nevermind" thing.
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 6 January 2011 00:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
willing to bet MM movies would be improved w/ a bizarre "comedy" serial killer schtick.
― nanoflymo (ledge), Thursday, 6 January 2011 00:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
well, the rabbit lady was the highlight of roger & me...
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 6 January 2011 00:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
― I Am Kurious Assange (polyphonic), Wednesday, January 5, 2011 4:28 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark
Gets v predictable tho, after you watch his Ep.1 review and go onwards - comparable to Family Guy, like you know the exact moment in which a joke isn't going to be made. They're sort on par as well, as far as that "I'm a fat serial killer" theme goes. All screaming is cut short, and the repetition shtick was never funny. But otherwise I love this guy to hell.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
If they had to "go there", a simple pan in the basement showing just a glimpse of his prisoner would have been more than enough.
The repeating, like trying to explain Junga Gin's bet with Watto, or even the "what's wrong with your face?!?!" killed me.
Funnier than the hustage scenes at least.
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
That's just the Ep.1 review tho, right? He does the same basement hostage thing in each and every review and it gets tired fast. But, again, this is me bitching because I am bored and in this democracy of ilxor feel the need to state an opinion. I love the guy.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:30 (2 years ago) Permalink
at least in this third review, the majority of off-topic stuff happened at the end of the videos, so you could skip if you didn't care. although i like nadine and her betty-boop voice.
― there is no turning back in an art game? (reddening), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
i've threatened to make a fan-edit with the horror-comedy stuff excised before but it would feel too much like i was making greedo shoot first.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
I never watched the new Star Warses because they looked shit, so sadly I don't get to enjoy the blissful closure provided by these rapey videos telling me they are shit
― Urban Coochie Collective (sic), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
Not sure how to react when I hear comments like this. I myself haven't seen mega-blockbusters like Transformers 2 just out of lack of interest but Star Wars, of anything, is a cultural stape. Plus it's just like 2/24 hours of your day. It's not like you're committing to the army here.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 01:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
6 hrs iirc
also it is universally acknowledged to have turned out to be even shitter than it looked
also there are about 20 Hitchcock films and a year of Mad Men I haven't seen, would you argue that they should get in the queue behind Attack Of The Clones?
― Urban Coochie Collective (sic), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
There's plenty of quality stuff everywhere, I'm more saying that there are certain things in pop culture that almost bear a definition of being an obligation, no matter how bad they are. Like, as in, it's impossible to carry on conversation with most people without having seen them - and unlike flunkers of movies like Watchmen or Wolverine or whatever, the Star Wars prequels still continue to be discussed (of course, negatively) years upon years upon years upon years after they hit theaters.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
I've still only seen 1.5 of the prequels (totally lost interest midway through Clones), and don't plan on ever "correcting" that.
― Simon H., Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
It's like you guys are trying to make me defend the films. Your choice on not seeing them, I don't care; but you're missing out on luls.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
Like, as in, it's impossible to carry on conversation with most people without having seen them
I guess I'm lucky in not having run into most people
― Urban Coochie Collective (sic), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:34 (2 years ago) Permalink
to get the luls we have to watch 6 hours of horrible shitty movies and then another 8 hours of rapey comedy reviews of the horrible shitty movies? idk mayne there's a shitload of Wodehouse I haven't re-read since I was 14 that's guaranteed to have a massively higher lol/time invested ratio
― Urban Coochie Collective (sic), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
this has been confirmed independently by many people: watch the movies with the english off, and it magically becomes a jodorowskian masterpiece. this alchemy will make you question if you can ever competently judge a movie with subtitles ever again.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
If you had done it the right way, it would be 2 hours a year with intermissions of about 2-3 years between.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
note: the turn english off trick also works with the matrix
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 6 January 2011 02:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
i don't know that the prequels have really entered the culture with any depth, other than memes like "NOOOOOOOO!" and "Jar-Jar sucks" and maybe just the generic "the prequels were shit." if you told people you hadn't seen the prequels they'd probably congratulate you tbh.
― there is no turning back in an art game? (reddening), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:27 (2 years ago) Permalink
also liked the point the last review made, that the emperor is the most likable character in episode III because he's the only one displaying any sort of passion or drive.
― there is no turning back in an art game? (reddening), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
the review is excellent and thankfully the least rapey of the three. but it made me hate myself because towards the end he complains about hayden christensen's spliced appearance at the end of jedi not making sense because the ghosts look "the way luke remembers them", and i could not keep myself from thinking that this is actually wrong, cuz the difference between vader and the others in that shot is that anakin "died" back when he looked like christensen, as in like spiritually man, and his entire existence as darth vader was a living death from which he has only now released himself, and so luke sees him as he was before he fell: the Platonic Anakin. (this is also why sebastian shaw isn't all gross and scarred and crusty in ghost-form in the un-fucked-with version.)
the reviews are very smart and accurate and cinema-literate without being myopically film-school, and they can be really educational, but mostly they're cathartic, for those of us who sat through the movies: i wouldn't really ask anyone who escaped to go back into that particular pulverized building.
― difficult listening hour, Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
yeah that makes sense. but by that logic i'd rather platonic anakin appear as the annoying little boy version, since at least that was before he became a floppy-haired douche who whined all the time and killed sand children or w/e.
― there is no turning back in an art game? (reddening), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
For those who haven't seen the sequels: wanna volunteer your reactions for watching just a 10min portion and seeing if it provokes any laffs/u get it? Please don't do this trying to prove me wrong, it's not an opinion I'll carry w/ me 2 tha grave.
― heh (kelpolaris), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:48 (2 years ago) Permalink
I KILLED THEM ALL
― those balls look like a butt (San Te), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
THEY'RE LIKE AN ANIMAL
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:52 (2 years ago) Permalink
now that would have made the movie better
― those balls look like a butt (San Te), Thursday, 6 January 2011 03:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
I watched the whole thing about TPM yesterday. I haven't seen 2 or 3, but just watched the first ten minutes of the 2 review. Even though I hadn't seen it, the examples he shows comparing it to -- what was that, the Last Starfighter or somthing? -- proves his point. Then again, I haven't seen the movies so I have to take his word for it.
Turned it off at the point where he was asking his hostage for coffee.
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 6 January 2011 04:05 (2 years ago) Permalink
Commander Nefarious, Captain I'm-a-Bad-Guy & Admiral Bone-to-Pick
― trap goin hal jam (Pillbox), Thursday, 6 January 2011 04:56 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Crazed Mister Handy (kingfish), Thursday, 6 January 2011 07:01 (2 years ago) Permalink
(this is also why sebastian shaw isn't all gross and scarred and crusty in ghost-form in the un-fucked-with version.)
Sebastian Shaw looks alot older than Hayden. I mean why isnt Ewan McGregor in place of Sir Alec Guiness now?
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 6 January 2011 10:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
― trap goin hal jam (Pillbox), Wednesday, January 5, 2011 11:56 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark
― Princess TamTam, Thursday, 6 January 2011 11:08 (2 years ago) Permalink
also:
― Princess TamTam, Thursday, 6 January 2011 11:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
Futurama did the name thing better, when the characters participated a Sithal War re-enactment. They fought against Darth Stroyer, Darth Trocious, Darth Sploder, Darth Urderer, and Darth Ithead.
― children with wasting diseases (Phil D.), Thursday, 6 January 2011 11:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
btw sic dont let anyone talk you into seeing these movies, u made the right choice
― Princess TamTam, Thursday, 6 January 2011 13:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
Yeah, and the reviews have a lot of interesting things to say about story structure etc, but there's no real point sitting through them if you haven't watched the prequels.
In a similar vein I watched about half of the Star Trek one last night, and it was good but there were too many references to old Trek stuff I know very little about for me to bother continuing.
― A brownish area with points (chap), Thursday, 6 January 2011 13:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
haha thats my fav thing about the trek reviews... he really 'gets' trek! i love when he spots props reused in completely different movies
― Princess TamTam, Thursday, 6 January 2011 13:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
"...it just goes to show the importance of... Hey, what's that doing there? No, really! How did that GET there?"
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 6 January 2011 14:43 (2 years ago) Permalink
Like I said, I never saw the movie and know nothing about the attempted assassination of Queen Amaladyada, but I was able to be entertained by his observations of the lack of logic of Obi jumping out the window, letting Boba Fett get away, the SHAPESHIFTER wearing a MASK, etc.
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 6 January 2011 14:52 (2 years ago) Permalink
the funniest thing in the whole review is the shot of Sam L. Jackson with the tip of his lightsaber at the Emperor's throat, and we cut to ANAKIN, who is RUNNING into the room, but halfway across the screen he inexplicably slows to a very fast walk and kind of quick-waddles towards them
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 6 January 2011 15:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
My favourite part of the Ep. 3 review is the clip of Lucas looking at photos of sets being built and saying "my god, they're building sets? I'd better start writing the script!"
― nate woolls, Thursday, 6 January 2011 15:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
I love how he points out the limitations of the tiny green screen sets vs. a massive soundstage, that the actors basically have 25 feet or so to work with as they walk and stop and talk. Reminds me of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, where the running through the woods stuff was basically shot by reusing the same 30 feet of woods over and over again because they only had a limited amount of dolly tracks.
My fave bit in the Star Trek review is when he tracks on the map the progress of the elevators or whatever through the ship, revealing that a) the old Trek creators cared about such a nerdy detail (that is, that it takes x seconds to move from point a to point b in the ship) and that the nu Trek folks couldn't give a shit, since their movie is not about nerdy details, per se, but about supercharging everything. Also, he's very OTM when he details the re-quel's pervasive case of the Not Gays.
― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 6 January 2011 15:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
I saw a little bit of the first prequel and that's it. Watched all of the first review and some of the second, and thought they were lolsome.
― emil.y, Thursday, 6 January 2011 16:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
'A little bit of the first prequel' totalling about two viewings of ten minutes or so apiece, I guess I should clarify. Really couldn't bring myself to watch any more.
― emil.y, Thursday, 6 January 2011 16:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
Also, he's very OTM when he details the re-quel's pervasive case of the Not Gays.
LOL, especially w/Scotty and Bones, since they don't have love interests in the movie.
― children with wasting diseases (Phil D.), Thursday, 6 January 2011 16:39 (2 years ago) Permalink
cuz obi-wan remained in the light until his death and anakin strayed from it when he was younger. and yeah shaw was a lot older than christensen but back then we didn't know how old anakin was when he became vader or what he looked like or anything and a cleaned-up and smiling middle-aged guy worked fine.
like, this isn't some hugely important part of the movie and obv it is extremely dorky to argue about and it's probable george lucas has no idea what we're talking about and just shoved christensen in there in his mania to "link up" the two halves of his "vision" but this explanation makes more sense to me than "they look as luke remembers them", which if it were true would presumably require anakin to appear in a big scary suit.
― difficult listening hour, Thursday, 6 January 2011 17:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
They should've done the same thing in Godfather III with Fredo, the Don and Sonny.
― http://tinyurl.com/MO-02011 (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 6 January 2011 17:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
Currently on Twitter:
--
TrendsWorldwide
tYp3 LyK tHi5Jar Jar BinksJustin Bieber-centricPaola BrachoVanity Fair CoverPhantom MenaceShim ChangminGremi OverFernanda VasconcellosPatricia Amorim
― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 8 January 2011 18:20 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucas shoulda done 'pocket prequels' and made em all like trailer length instead
― mavisbeacon666 (San Te), Saturday, 8 January 2011 18:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
http://www.movieline.com/2011/01/george-lucas-believes-in-2012-for-real-says-concerned-citizen-seth-rogen.php
In a new Toronto Sun article, Rogen explains that a meeting with Lucas and Spielberg soured once the subject turned to Mayan calendar drama.
“George Lucas sits down and seriously proceeds to talk for around 25 minutes about how he thinks the world is gonna end in the year 2012, like, for real. He thinks it.
“He’s going on about the tectonic plates and all the time Spielberg is, like, rolling his eyes, like, ‘My nerdy friend won’t shut up, I’m sorry…’
“I first thought he (Lucas) was joking… and then I totally realized he was serious and then I started thinking, ‘If you’re George Lucas and you actually think the world is gonna end in a year, there’s no way you haven’t built a spaceship for yourself… So I asked him… ‘Can I have a seat on it?’
“He claimed he didn’t have a spaceship, but there’s no doubt there’s a Millennium Falcon in a garage somewhere with a pilot just waiting to go… It’s gonna be him and Steven Spielberg and I’ll be blown up like the rest of us.”
― Young Guns aside, the western is not my favorite genre. (latebloomer), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 04:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
So Star Wars came into being just so he could have inspired enough geeks to create spaceships so one of them could take him away somewhere? With Spielberg?
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 05:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
Spielberg is, like, rolling his eyes, like, ‘My nerdy friend won’t shut up, I’m sorry…’
Makes me wonder what it must be like for Spielberg to still be friends with GL, (particularly after the SW prequels). GL *must* have asked him what he thought and would he just lie? say "they're not for me"? I mean S/berg at least can still make a decent film, so to see one of his oldest and richest pals actively desecrating his own legacy in new and exciting ways every year must affect the dynamic of their friendship. Especially as this is the man whose input made sure that the last Indy film was dead in the water.
― Bill A, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 08:50 (2 years ago) Permalink
Hang on now--Spielberg is the force behind Michael Bay's Transformers shitfests, and the man responsible for foisting Shia Lebouef on the world, so don't be giving him too much credit
― buildings with goats on the roof (James Morrison), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 08:55 (2 years ago) Permalink
plus yeah, i'm just as inclined to blame spielberg as lucas for that last indy shitfest.
― normal_fantasy-unicorns (contenderizer), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 08:57 (2 years ago) Permalink
foisting Shia Lebouef on the world
balls, that shit almost cancels out AI for me...
as for Indy blame, from what I understand it was Lucas that actively vetoed Frank Darabont's script and went with his own Mayan temple fixated horseshit, and that turd remained resolutely unpolished. Guess Spielberg can be blamed for agreeing to make the fucking thing, but the underpinning garbage = all GL.
― Bill A, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 09:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
If it wasn't for the piles of money he sleeps on at night, I'd call Lucas a tragic figure
― Young Guns aside, the western is not my favorite genre. (latebloomer), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 09:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
from what I understand it was Lucas that actively vetoed Frank Darabont's script and went with his own Mayan temple fixated horseshit, and that turd remained resolutely unpolished. Guess Spielberg can be blamed for agreeing to make the fucking thing, but the underpinning garbage = all GL.
The actual screenplay was written by the guy who wrote the screenplay for Jurassic Park and its sequel, though. And I thought the whole alien plot was right up Spielberg's alley, after all he has been directing and producing various alien movies and TV series since 1977.
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 10:04 (2 years ago) Permalink
Both are 100% establishment hacks now and no doubt both have complete respect for each other as such.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 14:51 (2 years ago) Permalink
spielberg doesnt seem like the kind of guy who'd be tortured over not being able to tell his friend that his movies suck - is probably just happy to nod and smile and be nice about it
― Princess TamTam, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 14:57 (2 years ago) Permalink
It's like if your mate's in a band that you think are shit you just pretend that you like their band and hope they don't ask too many questions about why you like them.
― Rejoice that you weren't eaten (chap), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
Spielberg has produced tons of films, including Harry and the Hendersons and the live-action Flintstones and Casper movies. The movies he has directed himself - the latest IJ aside - have been pretty great.
― kkvgz, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:29 (2 years ago) Permalink
I was surprised to see his name in the credits for True Grit.
― Pleasant Plains, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
GL: Say, Steve, so what did you make of The Revenge of The Sith?SS: George, I thought it was just super, rly great. Also, Admiral Bone-To-Pick, I *loved* that guy.
― Bill A, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
Spielberg's last seven films as director are pretty patchy and there's a couple of outright disasters
2008 Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull 2005 Munich 2005 War of the Worlds 2004 The Terminal 2002 Catch Me If You Can 2002 Minority Report 2001 A.I. Artificial Intelligence
― Number None, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
At least four of those movies are among the best he's ever done!
BTW, Spielberg helped storyboard and pre-viz the Anakin/Obi-Wan lava fight at the end of Revenge Of The Sith, so there you go.
― you think you're cool, but you read ick (Phil D.), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Terminal and A.I. suck and I haven't seen the last Indy movie, but the other movies are fine
― Princess TamTam, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
Well, I adored AI, really liked Munich, CMIFC and WoTW and could probably watch Minority and The Terminal again. Only real stinker there imo is poor ol' Indy.
Re Anakin/Obi-Wan fight, apart from the skipping about on the river of lava I dug that well enough. Certainly chopped up charred up Ani was more than I expected to see so vividly rendered.
― Bill A, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
Crystal Skull - Crystal Shit more likeMunich - Very goodWar of the Worlds - nice action, otherwise mehThe Terminal - Horribly misjudged IMO. Should've been a flat-out quirky comedyCatch Me if You Can - Great fun on first viewing, tiring on second. Also kind of sexist.Minority Report - Fantastic until the final actA.I. - I thought it was a mess with a few great ideas when I saw it in the cinema, maybe I should watch it again
― Rejoice that you weren't eaten (chap), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
The Terminal and AI (although i know it has it's defenders) were the disasters i was referring to. Catch Me If You Can and Minority Report really don't hold up on repeat viewings. War of the Worlds pretty much sucks.
― Number None, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
Dude directed The Lost World, cannot be trusted.
― da croupier, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 15:53 (2 years ago) Permalink
this is a movie worth watching! though it sounds like a south park premise.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 19:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
this was a Simpsons episode, and a live Kids in the Hall bit (and Mr. Show too, iirc?)
― ex-heroin addict tricycle (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 19 January 2011 19:35 (2 years ago) Permalink
Spielberge is on record as saying ..Clones is his 'second favourite Star Wars film'. also he features a fair bit in the extras on the prequels dvds apparantly although i haven't seen em.
are Munich and Catch Me If You Can any good then? i thought Speilberg was a washout these days but maybe.. not?
― piscesx, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 20:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
Munich is great, Catch Me If You Can is charming.
― polyphonic, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 20:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
I saw the Robot Chicken version of Munich the other night. Yikes
― Pleasant Plains, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 20:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
there's some weird backwards thing going on with spielberg where the movies are executed with more confidence the further back in time you go.i have nothing but hate for michael bay but you get the sense that the man has a clear and willful sense of exactly what kind of shit he's going to make you endure.
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 19 January 2011 20:33 (2 years ago) Permalink
2008 Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
2005 Munich
2005 War of the Worlds
2004 The Terminal
2002 Catch Me If You Can
2002 Minority Report
2001 A.I. Artificial Intelligence
Though I haven't seen the Indy, did any other director have as good a run in the 00s?
― ryan, Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
coen bros, wachowski bros, any bros I suppose.
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
who were the brothers that did "from hell"?
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:34 (2 years ago) Permalink
hughes
― Achillean Heel (darraghmac), Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:36 (2 years ago) Permalink
found munich v boring, heavy and overrated, but mostof his other 00's work was good to great imo. Indy aside obv
― Achillean Heel (darraghmac), Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
s1ocki started this thread to suggest options for a poll, but did we ever do a poll thread of this?
― some dude, Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:38 (2 years ago) Permalink
all the 00's movies are kind of OK passtime, but c'mon:
1989 Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade 1987 Empire of the Sun 1985 The Color Purple 1984 Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom 1983 Twilight Zone: The Movie (segment 2) 1982 E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial 1981 Raiders of the Lost Ark
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 20 January 2011 01:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
― some dude, Wednesday, January 19, 2011 8:38 PM Bookmark
no point, building meter data would win
― Doctor Casino, Thursday, 20 January 2011 23:49 (2 years ago) Permalink
Blu Ray trailer looks good despite it combining prequel footage with the originals: http://www.starwars.com/video/view/001175.html
― piscesx, Thursday, 27 January 2011 03:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
Love the originals, but I'm almost completely numb to these movies right now. All those shoddy VFX spliced into the originals will look even WORSE in high-def.
― Millsner, Thursday, 27 January 2011 09:45 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucas must be the only director that would look at a frame of film with Sir Alec Guinness in it and think "You know what would make this even better? A giant dinosaur butt blocking the entire frame."
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 27 January 2011 19:59 (2 years ago) Permalink
A long time ago in another lifetime, I was in a screening room sitting in front of the late Gene Siskel. This was after the first "special edition" came out, and around the same time a new edition of "The Godfather" was screened. Someone asked him how it was, and he said "oh, it's pretty much the same, except now in the wedding scene there's a big giant lizard in the background. And during Brando's death scene, there's a little robot walking around."
― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 27 January 2011 20:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
If Lucas thinks the world will end next year, won't that (with any luck) stop him 3ding these fuckers? No point, surely, since they won't be out in time.
― buildings with goats on the roof (James Morrison), Thursday, 27 January 2011 22:54 (2 years ago) Permalink
is there any more 2012 ho-lucas-t information besides the seth rogen hearsay?
― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 27 January 2011 22:58 (2 years ago) Permalink
Lucas is waiting until he can release these in 4-D, in Smell-O-Vision.
― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 27 January 2011 23:22 (2 years ago) Permalink
I love the smell of bantha shit in the morning.
― Rejoice that you weren't eaten (chap), Thursday, 27 January 2011 23:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
I recently watched anamorphically re-encoded versions of the originals that came out on the 2006 DVD release and it was such a pleasure! I'd almost forgot that they could be enjoyable. They're obviously GREAT movies in their original form, but the special editions are simply unwatchable. Despite the egregious and anachronistic cgi insertions, the whole thing has been color-corrected to death.
― Spencer Chow, Friday, 28 January 2011 00:52 (2 years ago) Permalink
The only thing I truly found about the increases sfx editions was the really bizarre song break-out in Jabba's bar in the 1st or 2nd (or..3rd?) movie. And I'm not even sure if that was actually one of the deleted scenes, but it was truly fucking insane.
And I guess while I'm at it I can't seem to remember the first encounter w/ Jabba and Han Solo actually having him mobile and talking to Han on the way to the m. falcon? Was that even changed? Did it always look so awful?
― The previous message has been brought to you by (kelpolaris), Friday, 28 January 2011 04:18 (2 years ago) Permalink
song was in the 3rd one. they shot it just for the SE.
in the 70s version han talks to jabba offscreen. theatrical SE and the current editions have very different versions of that scene, mainly because the original CG jabba looked fucking awful even by 1997 standards.
― a nan, a bal, an anal ― (abanana), Friday, 28 January 2011 04:32 (2 years ago) Permalink
Xp yeah.
Han never meets him in the first film, they added the whole scene by cgi-ing Jabba over the original actor from a scene that was deleted. Et voila!
To confuse things further they re-CGI'd the scene a bit for the DVD in '04 to make it more realistic than the original re-releases that came out in the late 90s.
There are yet more changes planned for the new Blu Ray edition. He probably.. flies in or something.
― piscesx, Friday, 28 January 2011 04:42 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 28 January 2011 04:44 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Spencer Chow, Friday, January 28, 2011 12:52 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark
Those are pretty awful DVD transfers though. I have a strong suspicion that Lucas deliberately made sure that the DVD transfers of the non-special editions were half-assed.
― Matt Armstrong, Friday, 28 January 2011 05:02 (2 years ago) Permalink
ugh this is precisely why this is so sad - Lucas has actually ruined your memory
― ex-heroin addict tricycle (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 28 January 2011 05:37 (2 years ago) Permalink
any good write-ups on what lucas has to say about the new editions? all i've heard is that he's fairly proud of them and that his vision can finally be completed w/ the ease of sfx.
i can't deny the guy is a grade-a definition visionary (YOU try simply imagining a universe as unique and in-depth as the star wars one) but i really can't believe the guy when thinking that back in the 70's, as he was gazing at the sarlacc pit that he had thought "if only this had a beak, then it would be complete" (it's a FUCKING MOUTH IN THE GROUND. how horrifying/ novel is that already?)
― The previous message has been brought to you by (kelpolaris), Friday, 28 January 2011 05:46 (2 years ago) Permalink
Did not know about the Jabba CGI re-do. Weird. Also, i totally agree with kelpolaris re: the only real big jarring problem was the singing scene in ROTJ. Sorta felt like the moment you saw that, you knew you had been sucked from the normal universe of OG Star Wars into the parallel dimension of hell that is Jar Jar Binks & Kit Fisto.
There's a great DVD bootleg someone's put together called "Deleted Magic", which is the first Star Wars with all the outtakes and unreleased footage synced up to the original Laserdisc film and shit. Absolutely jaw-dropping and a million times more enjoyable than anything past ROTJ.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 28 January 2011 06:17 (2 years ago) Permalink
UGH I HATE THAT JABBA SCENE. like i'm a grown-up now and i don't CARE about all the rest, i don't CARE that greedo shoots first, i don't CARE about the dinosaur butts, i don't CARE that there's little bullshit animals scampering around every establishing shot farting, i don't care about any of it EXCEPT THE JABBA SCENE god i hate it so so so so so so much. so much.
― difficult listening hour, Friday, 28 January 2011 06:23 (2 years ago) Permalink
tbh that first picture is really funny. looks like jabba is tripping his balls off
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 28 January 2011 06:25 (2 years ago) Permalink
he's watching the scene on the monitor.
― difficult listening hour, Friday, 28 January 2011 06:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
? i meant offscreen as in a scene not shown
― a nan, a bal, an anal ― (abanana), Friday, 28 January 2011 06:26 (2 years ago) Permalink
They need to make Alec guiness step in dinosaur poop. In 3d.
― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 28 January 2011 06:28 (2 years ago) Permalink
Think of the possibilities.
what's infuriating about the jabba scene is that despite what george lucas says because he has some kind of seriously sick thing where every time he changes anything he has to act like that was his "original intention", like he had every second of every scene of every star wars movie all written out in his giant genius-head in 1976, that scene was shot with a human actor not so they could replace him with jabba (how would they have done this) but because that was jabba, because they didn't know what jabba looked like yet, and hadn't yet had the wonderful idea of making him into this obscene punch-cartoon parody of a swollen-to-immobility space capitalist, and thank god they cut the scene because A) it's a literally pointless scene anyway that slows the movie down for absolutely no reason and B) if they hadn't jabba would be a guy in a furry vest instead of an icon. an icon george lucas doesn't even understand the first thing about because he thinks it's acceptable to have him scooting around the set like he's in fucking Worms.
― difficult listening hour, Friday, 28 January 2011 06:40 (2 years ago) Permalink
The transfer isn't Blu-ray, but these have at least been re-encoded by someone for widescreen tv. They are quite a bit better than the old laserdiscs which were the previously final "untouched" version. It's highly watchable and I very strongly recommend it!!!
― Spencer Chow, Friday, 28 January 2011 07:15 (2 years ago) Permalink
the special editions came out when i was 11 or 12, and they were the first time i saw all of the movies. previously i'd seen at least one of the star wars, but i cant remember which one. i thought all the special content was awesome, but that was both at the age and time when CGI imagery was at its most novel to me. since the movies were still amazing, i went for years not really thinking the SEs were any kind of major transgression. i hadnt seen any of them again until this last christmas, when i was at my friend's house and he had them on in the background on his plasma. i caught the end of Star Wars and was pleased to see that it still held up really well even after the prequels, and i appreciated the practical effects in a way I couldn't before. had to skip Empire, but when we sat down for the opening of ROTJ my eyes bulged in... amazement? at the tarted up CGI musical number that'd been inserted into the jabba's palace sequence. how did i forget this? why would you replace a kickin rad rubber puppet disco song with this shit? that was the moment when i 'got' all the bitching about greedo shooting first.
― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Friday, 28 January 2011 07:24 (2 years ago) Permalink
i guess the maddening thing about lucas is he could so easily use his powers for good. he has the resources to give us cleaned up, gorgeous transfers of the original trilogy, where every frame isn't crowded with computer generated farting banthas. he financed the prequels himself! he had nobody to answer to! he could've made literally anything he wanted. imagine if you gave jodorowsky 400 million and told him to make ~the space opera of his dreams~. the original space battle in ROTJ is (very likely) the most complicated trad effects sequence ever shot, and you can tell lucas hates it because episode 3 is filled with the kind of long, showy takes that couldn't have been done with models. there's nothing boundary-pushing about all that processing power onscreen, and it's deflating in a way because it illustrates the limits of his ambitions - just like there's nothing to be gained from overexplaining a tantalizing backstory, the VFX of the original trilogy (and lucas' own mythologizing around the time of the SEs) makes you think 'oh, there's so much he wanted to show us but just couldn't!' - but it turned out that the original movies thrived on those limitations, and him going back and splashing white-out on everything amounts less to ~movie magic~ and more to pulling the curtain back on the wizard of oz.
― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Friday, 28 January 2011 08:03 (2 years ago) Permalink
he financed the prequels himself! he had nobody to answer to! he could've made literally anything he wanted.
^^ this is sort of the problem, isnt it? i mean for me one of the big tragedies/disappointments was the realization that george lucas is boring, lazy and untalented
― max, Friday, 28 January 2011 08:09 (2 years ago) Permalink
& it makes you go back to the original trilogy wondering if youd just been fooled the whole time
― max, Friday, 28 January 2011 08:10 (2 years ago) Permalink
yeah thats what im getting at - what he wanted was boring and awful
― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Friday, 28 January 2011 08:11 (2 years ago) Permalink
it's like poetry, it rhymes
― marios balls in 3d for 3ds (Princess TamTam), Friday, 28 January 2011 08:13 (2 years ago) Permalink
How much of Indiana Jones was him and how much was Spielberg?
― polyphonic, Friday, 28 January 2011 08:14 (2 years ago) Permalink
― Lamp, Friday, 28 January 2011 08:16 (2 years ago) Permalink
What I want is an entire disc of Empire stuff:
― Crazed Mister Handy (kingfish), Friday, 28 January 2011 08:20 (2 years ago)