Society is in the gutter

http://b7.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/00839/75/01/839451057_s.gif

I remember we didn't use to lock our front doors, infact we had all our possessions out on the front yard.

Society is a hole
it makes me lie to my friends
it's running down my street
with white powers sneakers
on the beautiful beat of black feet

society is a hole
it beats my friends big heads
my friends have big heads,
I can understand it
but I don't recommend it
you got big big hair
and everybody is scared

society is a hole
it makes me lie to my friends
the assault of holy music
there's a slap in my face
my friends are girls wrapped in boys
we're living in pieces
I want to live in peace

Society is a hole

We were poor but we were happy. We knew the value of things. We never wondered about the value of valuing things.

It's a shambles.

http://www.bathgateregal.org.uk/images/listings/high-society-2.jpg

They were very poor and could only afford a few servants...

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”

http://celebritymound.smugmug.com/photos/157582259-M.jpg

But they always tipped their hat to you on the streets.

Nowadays you must carry a knife in your own home for protection.

The guys I shot were so heavily pixelated they didn't even seem real.

http://media.ourstory.com/80/00/00/7037dfd226c005020962065a58c91fa19d502aa7/070720e123795453b1c8dc3c08a3702564779dc4.jpg

I stole that BB8 guide - it said "you need it and it's free", so I took it and left the Heat magazine behind at the newsagents.

Then I mugged a pensioner, filmed 'im rolling around on the pavement, and posted it on YouTube. Then I went back to Eton.

What a bloody waste.

People knew where they stood. Sure times were hard but things were things and that was important.

People don't know who their bloody neighbours are.

(xxpost) I sold his false teeth on e-b4y.

We used to have a mangle.

You could put one foot in front of the other repeatedly to get to a location of your choice. These days you can't walk down the bloody street.

it's time for change

at least you had streets, in my day we just had caves, but we all looked out for each other

A knife. One times this kid can't remember his name brought a knife to school. We all of us just stared at it. Then we looked at the kid.

Nowadays...

Its a ruddy disgrace. You used to be able to borrow a cupful of sugar without getting a punch in the face.

These days, "texting" is passed off as genuine communication.

something must be done. real action. the politicians are too busy straightening bananas with the brussels elite. REAL ACTION.

I used to knew all the names of the boys at school but now when I walk past I don't know who any of them are. Society has literally been dissolved in a vat of acid

The sky seemed different. And the birds. The birds!

i remember when you would stop in the street, on your way to the market, and find yourself in immersed in hour-long conversations. now it's just an awkward smile, a pained nod.

A shiv in the guts.

Society has gone mad with its own sense of self importance, and taken a high jump from the nearest cliff. Now its corpse lies rotting in a ditch, having been stripped for clothes and parts by Eastern European tramps.

In my day there was no heart trouble but these days i suffer from heart disease, angina, and youths are literally breaking society apart with their bare hands

Society can regularly be seen flailing around the streets late at night, looking for another party.

30 years ago society was an altar boy with a side parting. It was a great time to be alive!

We would wake up in the morning. Later we would go to bed at night. I never heard anyone question it.

we used to make things in this country, now everybody's got his hand in the other guy's pocket. literally!

it used to be, you got married, you stayed married. now, who knows??

gangs of thug youths are literally eating society and shitting out blocks of pure despair

prices are rising, the celtic tiger has accidentally ingested the credit crunch. now society totters about like ronnie wood in high heels after a 3 day cocaine dinner.

when i was a child, the only homosexuals i knew were arabs, and we chased them out of town with elm branches. now, i wake up every day to see homosexuals on tv, the radio, sometimes even on my back patio, engaging in unspeakable acts.

you can't even be sure of your own sexuality anymore. society has become an endless freddie mercury sex tape, stuck in the broken video recorder that passes for real values nowadays.

times used to be you could spend an afternoon with a young lad and not have it questioned by the papers and the young lads mother

Kids today with their Teacake Mix and Premark - my mum made all our clothes out of used spaghetti

We listened to the radio. I'm talking about LISTENING.

every night we'd gather around the radio to listen to the weekly wrestling matches between roosevelt and churchill

what is with all of the child rape nowadays? this used to be illegal, now it's practically demanded of you. it's literally on youtube and on the chat rooms every day.

if you'd told me a child was being abused 30 years ago, I wouldn't have believed you!

x-post you're right, LISTENING. people LISTENED. they LISTENED.

whatever happened to courting? cotillions? gowns? these days society's lost in a haze of match dot toms and katies, swimming in a sea of cars that swerve all over the road.

All this million channel cable TV and internet and your wireless phone from that disgusting bloke who is that older woman's toyboy in them adverts, when I was a lad we didn't even have TV. My old man used to put an empty cereal box on his head and pretend it was a TV set, and then read from the papers our chips were wrapped in.

when i was younger, there was no such thing as irony, and if there was, no decent person had ever heard of it. now--its irony in the shower, irony for breakfast, irony in your afternoon nap. irony has literally kidnapped everything good and decent and tied it to a chair and literally beaten it.

There were no steroids in baseball. I'm talking about in the days before Jackie Robinson.

My sister I looked out for her. And my brother too. My father he was a good man.

Now I don't even remember their names.

What passes for entertainment now would literally kill a man from The Past. He would see entertainment, and then melt into a small pile of ash. Society has been fed to godless, homosexual sharks.

society isn't even in the gutter anymore since the hogs and spivs of the EU ruled our gutters illegal and took them away

the gutter is too good for them

I used to have to murder tramps so that I could steal their empty gin bottles to get the deposit back from the off license. Now when people stab up a tramp they don't even bother to nick his shoes to sell to the mad shoe collecting man down the street.

miscegenation!

One time when I was four or five, I don't know, I saw a house burn down. It was our neighbors house. Point is he, him and his family, he was our NEIGHBOR.

There used to be white dog shit on the pavements, now it's brown, and I'll tell you why! The EU communists have taken away our white dog shit and replaced it with brown!

and now who would it be? it could literally be anyone. he might be burning a house down right now and laughing. laughing! he may as well be laughing at society itself.

i might as well laugh at society, join in with them! when good men burn down houses and laugh at society its time for a war

nowadays if angelina jolie is in the gutter, society gets in too. if she climbs out of the gutter, it stands up and dusts itself off. it used to be there were consistent ideas, about culture, art, thought. now we just dig our graves alongside the spectres of society's future, and leave the past to the likes of Rita Hayworth.

it used to be that a man like Mickey Rooney was a handsome darling to man and woman alike, now it's all eleven foot spaniards who spend all day riding an excercize machine, bulging testicles on every billboard, it's an affront to every woman who leaves her home.

time was that satanists were round up and had it beaten out of them. now they sit in brussels laughing at society as they parcel it up and throw it in the sea

(PP! & LG are kind of killing us here guys)

it used to be that the little woman stayed at home and never had to look at billboards. now i never see the little woman! always with the bingo and the supermarket and the 'swingers club' whatever that is

society? in the gutter!

miscegenation!!!!!!

We went to hear the word. Every Sunday we went. Maybe we didn't understand it. An we sure didn't live up to it. But we went. We showed up.

Nowadays I daydream about what I going to order at CPK all through the sermon. You didn't have to worry about that back then, because there was no CPK, and if there had been a CPK it's have been closed on Sunday.

time was you used to be able toleave the curtains open and look out across the fields. you open the curtains now and a youth is literally hurling a piece of society at any honest man he can see

people used to know how to keep a secret, now there are shows on tv that literally will tell you everything you didn't want to know. people desperate to be famous by pressing their genitalia up against your face, instead of GETTING A JOB. who suffers? all of us. society.

once upon a time it was you used to look forward to getting a letter through the post from a family member but now junk mail is posted directly from the socialists and satanists of brussels and if thats no bad enough youths might be literally burning society outside your house and posting cinders through your letter box

letters? i wont have them in the house!

Pop music used to be those nice Rolling Stones, now it's all filthy dirty youths shouting AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! in your face. I mean, compare this:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cd/Stones1960s.jpg
...nice clean boys who are nice to their mums. Now compare it with this:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c7/Moby.jpg/418px-Moby.jpg
Who the hell is that filthy tramp - he must have nits 'cause they've had to shave off his infested stinking hair.

Girls. Girls were really beautiful. I'm talking about special. They were special things. It's hard to express. They humbled you.

if a man walks out in the daytime with a hat on, i give him only ten minutes before a mob gathers to just beat him and beat him for it. that only used to happen to whores!

in all our towns and villages youths are literally ejaculating on the face of society. the society that we built! out of granite and heart and sweat and putty. and now it has sperm on its sad little face

we used to have hoboes, who would sing songs to one another and kept to themselves in the railyard. now the "MSM" says you have to call them "homeless" and they're clambering over your back fence to steal your dog to shave its hair to sell for drugs

nobody even knew what "semen" was literally four or five years ago, now the stuff is everywhere and on everything and everyone is talking about it. constantly!

I don't remember my country being the most obese in the world when we ate meat and potatoes, and drank at lunch, and smoked cigarettes through the workday.

There was a movie house downtown. The kind they don't make anymore. The kind with a real curtain. I went with my brother. Our father gave us a nickel. We were so excited.

i am literally shocked by the brazenness of jews

When I was young, and we saw a swan out and about, we'd tip our hats to the swan and say hello. Now all the kids are illegal immigrants, all they do is eat them. People don't even wear hats any more, only time you see them is in one of them gigantic mosques.

in the war the air service was bombing mosques left and right, now we're building them in our country at an alarming rate!

you knew where you were. it wasn't pretty. but you knew. you knew.

You could cut down a tree. If you saw a tree you wanted you cut it down. Now they tell us we're running out of trees.

parking used to be FREE in this country. now it's still free but the lots are so big they should pay you for the time it takes to WALK into the store!! there should literally be a little bus.

Nonsense! Just more handwringing from out politically correct 'friends' from the surveillence society. Time was we used to be able to eat toasted swan and people from the local community would enjoy the wings and leftovers.

Today you eat a swan and there is an uproar. meanwhile a baby dies in the street, hit by a falling fragment of society, hurled by a youth! and no one bats an eyelid

dead babies in the street with mothers on protest marches! this is what we have replaced society with

protesting! just like the little woman. that kitchen isn't going to clean itself.

when was the last time you saw a baseball player with a moustache? and so many DOMINICANS. don't get me started!

in my day, there was no such THING as a moslem, just catholics and protestants, and now these immoral half-caste youths are running amok.

back then, when our legislators were men, we would have just enforced a law to deport anyone who didnt eat pork. in fact, when i was younger, you didnt even need a law to kick a deviant out of your country.

we're so busy sucking from the teat of the effete erudite EU that we've forgotten to do our own trousers up, and a youth is literally grasping our naked behind. he has folded society into a paper plane and used it to destroy the twin towers of morals and values.

All day we wouldn't stop. We used to run and play. Air filled our lungs and replenished our spirits.

time was you used to know where the spoons were. now you go in the kitchen and who knows where anything is. EU satanists want to give spoons the same rights as homosexuals.

back then, all you needed was a hard slap on the bottom, and then you knew your place. what good are all these ritalins if our youth still run around, literally getting tattoos and growing out their hair and soliciting oral sex?

people with tattoos are raping their own flesh and raping you in the face when you look at them. it used to be for a sailor who had drawn blood below the equator but that is a world that is GONE.

back then the equator MEANT SOMETHING. now? just another line for moslems and deviants to cross.

can anyone even remember what PUBIC HAIR is like??

One time I found a dead dog in the street. There was a boy, not much older than me, crying. I asked is this your dog. He just looked at me. Later we fought in the war together.

when i was growing up you could have a little play with another fellow and nothing would be said about it. Now the homosexuals in Brussels want to put it on the front cover of a newspaper. The EU are literally supplying youths with knives and employing them to stab society repeatedly in the face while they drink fine wines

back then, no one drank wine but the french, and we all know what the french were like

We couldn't afford stockings so we had to draw them on with gravy.

and it was good gravy, too, made in this country

wine was for communion and anniversaries, now people are drinking it in every place at every time, trying to get a girl's top off, those few that still even dress

First saw the ocean from the deck of a ship. Never liked the ocean much.

I wouldn't mind but they're so cheeky!

Society is in the guitar:

http://img56.imageshack.us/img56/159/imageuploadimagehl9.jpg

my father emigrated to this country in the aftermath of Powell's "Rivers of blood" speech. Have a fucking think about that. In the direct aftermath of "Fucking foreigners coming over here stealing our jobs...", my father came to this country. My olive-skinned, non-white father. I mean, bricks through windows, racial insults, deprived jobs...

can't even wear a tie in space now

time was you could just call a gay co-worker a fag, but now the PC police leap down your throat without blinking. for shame!

Time was you'd hook up a giant plastic guitar to your TV and play Guitar Hero. These days it's a quick fix society, everything must be instant. People are enjoying themselves but are they really ENJOYING themselves?

There was a time when two refined gentlemen could meet in a secure spot and have a bit of good old rough and masculine male-love, no questions asked and no strings attached. Nowadays these effete homosexuals claim even any decent fellow who occasionally likes to indulge in healthy backdoor polishing is somehow a member of their filthy group, as if they've claimed a patent on buggery!

http://www.slapyo.com/wp-content/wrong01.jpg

http://www.fortythree.com/Stencils/Public/BusinessMan2004Campaign/jump_shark_proof.jpg

xpost

(xpost) That's what your mother said to me this afternoon...

...then we jumped a shark together

society has literally jumped the shark

Society is the shark, therefore society is jumping itself.

There was a time you didn't have any choice in the matter.

a shark that has an EU grant to promote its PC lifestyle choice xp

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The Slim Possibility of Thought in the Mind of Someone Specific
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2008

yes, society literally has become a shark that people have to jump over to just live your life, and then the internet people hoot and holler at you on the internet.

I once met a man on the street.

i remember streets!!

can't even share a private in-joke on a popular message board now without people who weren't even born in this country trying to muscle in

There was a time you could fix sausage in the morning and leave it in a bowl on the stove all day or til it got ate. Now there's E. coli. When did that happen?

Remember when you could jump sharks whenever you wanted? The streets were literally littered with sharks you could bounce over! Now you jump one shark and immediately some Interweb wise-asses post a row of "ironic" pictures, they're unkempt Interweb beards barely muffling their smug smiles.

Used to be you could shoot a Finn on site and people understood.

Now you have to fill out a form first.

That's why it took so long to get rid of Crowded House - so much paperwork.

To quote dear old Max Miller, we're literally in the shark/Finn soup

These days are filled with homosexuals suggesting pairing cardigans with tuxedos. I am confused.

Used to be that a man about town in Hawaii would just where a Hawaiian shirt everywhere, regardless of the event or occasion.

If you offer to help show a man how to use a stick he hits you with it these days. These days someone is always laughing at you and someone is laughing at them and so on.

What the German spirit might be—who has not had his melancholy ideas about that! But this people has deliberately made itself stupid, for nearly a millennium: nowhere have the two great European narcotics, alcohol and Christianity, been abused more dissolutely. Recently even a third has been added—one that alone would be suffficient to dispatch all fine and bold fiexibility of the spirit—music, our constipated, constipating German music.

Known masturbators are leading our troops into battle.

These days when you walk down the street you don't know if men will assault you for looking too homosexual, or if homosexuals will assault you for looking too much like a man.

and back in the day, a woman was a woman, a man a man. now you can't call someone a person without getting in trouble for using a label. i miss the time when we were proud to be categorized, named, certified.

I WANT TO BE STEREOTYPED
I WANT TO BE CATEGORISED

...."classified," actually.

Remember when you shunned someone and they stayed shunned?

I will henceforth shun myself for my lyrical error - it's what I would have wanted

I blame so-called comedian Max Miller for the disgraceful decline in our society. With his "blue" gags he gave the "green" light to the filthy perversions which now constitute "humour" on the television and penalise the family who prefer to "keep it clean."

What would the Knights of the Round Table think?

erm, kids are still kicking balls in my street. little thugs.

Kids stabbing balls in the street etc

these days *shakes head*

So-called "children" were jumping up and down and making an unholy racket in my omnibus as it proceeded through the West of London. They were on their way to some disgraceful, degenerate "carnival." What a sad reflection of today, when in my childhood years we were content to derive fun from one grey sock with holes for many Christmases to come.

I've half a mind to literally put my foot through society and send the so-called PC Brigade the bill. Let's have an end to the do-gooders, liberals etc.

Thanks to sandal-wearing Tony Blair and his cronies, you can now press just one button on the internet and a sex offender will turn up at your house within seconds. And yet still honest taxpayers burn to death in buildings while the fire brigade takes four hours to get through the crowds at Red Ken's Pink Parade.

When I was young, one would show one's appreciation for a well-formed heel on a young lady by removing one's cap and nodding respectfully. Nowadays this is met with foul-mouthed abuse. We should of listened to Powell.

A glimpse of stocking was considered perfectly shocking but these days, as so-called rapper Charlotte Church would say, it's all gravy

I remember when all the gays were on the stage, making us laugh, like that nice Graham Norton. Now even society itself has a penis in its bottom.

We should of listened to Powell

Baden, Enoch AND Anthony

and Peter

30 years ago a child kicked a ball in the street. today that same child literally kicks society into the face of a pensioner

While litter remains on the streets youths literally put pensioners into the few bins that remain

what do you say to a child who has been unable to age for 30 years because of foreigners having sex on benefits which they use to make a bomb aimed at please, thank you and mushy peas?

At childrens birthday parties society is literally cut up and eaten while absent parents laugh

It's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.

The rot started with balls, really. When I was a child we were happy with a whip and a spinning top. These days they want a ball one minute and a Bentley the next, but you can't even whip your servants. Can't even whip your servants, but still they won't make it illegal to abduct and murder little children and bury them in the woods.

My elderly mother was left lying around a hospital untreated for three decades, and her rigid corpse ended up being used as a hospital bed for an asylum seeker with a cut to the thumb. Meanwhile the spin merchants in government are compiling the new year honours' list by copying names wholesale from the Sex Offenders Register. What on earth is going on?

i blame the parents, every one of them

Our parents fought and died in a war, and now Gordon Brown won't even give us a referendum on whether Britain should join the Middle East.

When you went on holiday you used to be able to ask your neighbours to check that the kids were doing okay.

In Brown's Britain they're more likely to kill them and turn their mutilated corpses into an 'art' exhibition -- and all at the taxpayer's expense.

Roy Whiting and Ian Huntley are sitting in five star "prison cell" bragging about their crimes on Face-book. Meanwhile, the Police can't even be bothered to find Milly Dowler. SORT IT OUT.

You can't even talk about who should be in the Tottenham team without people complaining.

http://www.youtube.com/v/cNy1w4DV5Hw

Haha stevem beat me to it

So, Gordon Brown and his merry band of socialists say it is not on for a grown man to vote for Paul Simon in Pazz and Jopp? I am a grown man I can vote for who I want! This is yet another example of socialism and political correctness killing our most proud traditions.

So, Gordon Brown and his rag tag bag of Eurocrats and Trots think it is inappropriate for me to talk about my love of corn dogs and hoagies on the internet when I should be doing my boring office job? Well I think they should eat a MASSIVE PLATE OF RIBS, perhaps then they would know what it is like in the real world.

Some of the messages on this thread are funny!

But it is curious that everyone - in about 160 posts on such a fractious board - seems happy to agree entirely with the tone of the thread, and produce more sarcastic parodies of laments for a lost past.

Actually, there are probably some things that were indeed better in the past, and some that were worse. Some things in the world today, one would not want to lose. Some, perhaps one would be glad to see the back of.

In a lot of ways, life for us - the expanded middle classes of the developed world - is probably as good or easy as life has ever been for anyone ever. Yet it is also true, I believe, that the planet Earth, as a physical environment and ecological system, has never been in a worse shape, at least not since it was covered in rivers of lava several million years ago. Some things do get worse, dangerously and tragically worse.

like Spurs

onimout

When children were made to join the army, they knew the meaning of discipline. Nowadays every child has a gun.

Mexicans celebrate their navidades by swatting Society with a cane til it literally bursts forth with detritus which they then collect, trade, and eat.

According to the Guardian's latest Tottenham report - and I quote - "The merits of the Wigan forward Emile Heskey have also been discussed."

One of the shortest conversations in history that one

When oh when will Left-wing subversives like Pinko Pinefox be dealt with by our bankrupt Government instead of being nauseatingly allowed to broadcast his nigglingly nitpicking propaganda about global warming which as we all know is a fallacy funded by disgusting Loony Lefties like George Michael. If the world is getting warmer why have we had THREE STINKING SUMMERS IN A ROW?

We would be basking in 95 degree temperatures if the Tories had been elected in 2005.

once, there was at least one summer a year. now, who knows?

i sold my house for a pint of beer, and then i spilt it all over my hooded top.

I blame the absence of Summer on the pernicious influence of porno princess and open advocate of homosexuality seventies soul songstress Donna Summer.

Once upon a time you could go outside and hear birds singing and the wind blowing. If you listened carefully, you could even hear the fizz and spit of the Sun as it warmed and replenished the Earth's natural resources.

Go outdoors nowadays and all you can hear is the tearing of society's moral fabric as it is ripped to bits by knife crime.

time was that footballers like other gallant sportsmen played for the love of the game and the pride of the local town. now as the local town is literally hacked to death by frenzied youths and thrown off bridges onto passing motorists, footballers literally play for money as they kick the balls directly at pensioners faces in the terraces - mimicked on the streets of our towns as youths literally pack footballs with ballbearings and explode them in the faces of pensioners opening their front doors hoping vainly for respite not shrapnel.

this is what we have replaced society with

in my youth there were no steroids just good honest sportsmanship, now watch as every young gun injects themselves literally full of the latest fashionable poison in order to emulate their idols, which is literally what theyre doing to society

This is a Christian Country and if those terrorists don't like it they should bugger back off home.

I went to the local post office the other day and they'd closed it to put a mosque there. You're treated like a second-class citizen if you want to buy a first-class stamp, but you can buy a bomb on every street corner.

This fascist/communist* New Labour government is literally murdering motorists in their sleep with their fuel tax, speed cameras and 30mph speed limit in built-up areas. Are we to believe that the lives of a few schoolchildren should come before the right of hard working motorists to drive wherever and however they choose? Brown's politically correct gauleiters are hellbent in driving us from the safety of our cars and herding us into the seething hellholes of public transport, to rub shoulders with stinking alcoholics, knife-wielding single mothers and black people. This is a holocaust for motorists.

(*delete where applicable)

We have become so greedy and complacent that we now have to have the true spirit of Christmas beamed to us via remote satellite.

Since the pinefox had to go and be all serious, I feel like I can now mention how much I love every one of ice crӕm's posts on this thread.

"If any middle class white male I come across says he wants to enter Crufts, I say 'give up all hope'. They've no chance"

Presenter Jeremy Paxman on discrimination in the dog industry

it used to be you could enjoy ice crӕm's posts without fear of the p.c. police jumping down your throat

It has become impossible for decent hard working citizens to walk down the street without almost being bowled over by Robert Mugabe riding his bicycle on the pavement

i remember when people here used real names like friedrich selassie wagemann and dallas spalding jr. now you don't know who you're talking at.

it were all fields around 'ere. ah used t'lark at the old munitions factory and ILX were nobbut but a small page o' truth bombs

page 3 used to show REAL BREASTS!

Families now spend their Sunday lunchtimes sitting in isolated crawlspaces gobbling up roast dinners with their hands - the Fathers' pendulous GM-mutated breasts wobbling around in gravy while Mother stuffs Duracell batteries up the chicken's arses instead of giblets. Hell in a handcart I tell ya.

Once kids could play out on the streets all day. Now, I threaten them with my shotgun until they run home crying to Mummy.

Society ain't gonna bring me down.

Heskey aside, this remains odd. It's a comedy thread, and some of it is funny. But it's incredibly homogeneous, and everyone seems to get the same joke in the same way. I get the impression that you all think that to complain or worry about something getting worse is silly, paranoid, reactionary and laughable.

I suppose something that would demonstrate otherwise would be a successful, popular, harmonious thread full of parodies of standard banal statements about how things are so much better than they were. Perhaps there has indeed been such a thread.

done!

Was a day you fell down a stairs and broke a tooth it was a big laugh, and you laughed too.

here comes the p.c. police again, ready to tell you not to make this thread, not to make that thread, all due to the bumbling bureaucrats in brussels. well ill tell you, im not one to take this lying down, after all, my generation fought in three wars, at home and abroad.

I get the impression that you all think that to complain or worry about something getting worse is silly, paranoid, reactionary and laughable.

Well it beats worrying about it

Used to be someone would start a thread, and other people would add to it. No one presumed to think there was a "better way."

in my day even the Pinefox was aware of the comments made by members of the British public on the websites of popular news organisations, which ILX would then have some fun parodying...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/talking_point/default.stm
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/newsdebate/index.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/yourview/
etc

Online "debates"? Pshaw! In my day we settled political differences over the garden fence with decent, manly fisticuffs! Jackets off, shirtsleeves rolled up, a bit of the old three four as Lefty Lemsip used to teach us in barracks after lights out. We didn't have to make do with so-called computers, not like today's Gone Soft Britain!

From days of yore:

Hello my young friends my staunch allies my stalwart comrades HE HE HE there'll be none of this backbiting rigmarole under my benign regime young man as will have you know was Guardian Angel on Line named entitled nomenclature of District and very nice red beret like communist Frank Spencer HE HE HE but you know those scamps you get on the trains late at night they don't half come a cropper when up against me I was very steadfast and erect against their vulgarian assault and intoned the intimidating words "Now then you raucous rapscallions you woebegone ne'er-do-wells have a care" and must have worked to some effect as only had 257 stitches when discharged from Park of Northwick very good hospital mind got some very good write ups and very jolly young house officer I say he was a one very presentable wouldn't have minded
as am former Navy man

but do you know it was a right royal caper similar to the time I used turps to wipe nigger-brown boot polish from corpse of decease Big Small Notorious I thought it were Cyril Smith and could only use handy John Collier two-piece worsted grey ensemble very handy for hiding scars caused by cross of iron.

Bestride oxen hoops ayonder! Inflame mid-port cummerbunds! Detonate errant youths inst! Axiom!

-- Wally Klemmer (klemm✧✧✧@d✧✧✧.y✧✧✧), February 15, 2002

is that a man or a woman we used to wonder. it seems these days the answer is BOTH!

the UN is making happy parties with childsnatchers and moslem raiders. all we have left are the comment boxes to fill up with LIBERTY and the "experts" want to shut those down too. this is society, today.

with this (C)rap music everywhere no wonder our kids want to stab us with our own guns

I hear Paul Gadd is set to star in a live action adaptation of Shrek.

Credit crunch? Brown's socialist hellions have plunged us headlong to disaster, together with the loony left BBC, they have encouraged us to borrow beyond our means, in order to afford the mortgages on our rent-to-buy properties which they have forced us to rent out, 12 to room, to the Lithuanian vegetable pickers that they and the Bolshevik EU encouraged to come and work in the first place!

In our day vicars' kids were brought up to believe in the Word of God with punishment by whipping and lots of it if they strayed from the path of righteousness (society was fortified for the better by whips). Now look what happens in Blair's Broken Britain; the sons of Archbishops by Holy Ordinance of Our Lord God Whose Father Alive In Heaven Amen are PERVERTED into becoming RAP SCALLIONS.

In the old days we would have shipped "Tim" Westwood to the colonies and made him row all the way non-stop (and whip him if he stopped, or whip him anyway just to remind him of the punishment if he stopped) - is "Dizzy Whiley" truly what So Brave Lord Nelson died fighting for?

there is a special satisfaction that comes from slapping a woman, hard. our children will never know.

Seventies TV legend Derren Nesbitt writes...

I'm a man of the world -- I know that pop stars have always misbehaved. And I was once young me'self! But if my daughter ever, ever touches drugs I'll know who to blame: Amy Wine-house and her sick gaggle of hangers-on.

What her poor dad must be feeling.

In my day you had to work to impress a lady. Now they deliver it through your nose! Where's the hard work, I say? Where's the reward? Where's your tea on the table? Nasal sprays don't darn the socks, do they? They don't do the ironing.

In my day telephones were for keeping in touch with your loved ones. Nowadays you can dial up illegal pornography on the you-tube, or dial up a sex offender for ungainly sinful pleasures of the flesh, but you can't even make a telephone call! Call me old-fashioned for wanting to speak to my dear husband on the telephone! Or is that rendered illegal now? Perhaps I should be dialling up a lethal concoction of drugs and visiting a rage party instead! Heavens above.

Oh for the days when The Black & White Minstrel Show provided wholesome family entertainment. Nowadays they import real minstrels wholesale and put them on so-called 'reality' television where they say the F word. What next, real Martians hosting Sale of the Century?

that Jerry Springer, you mean?

When did it become unacceptable to own a comfortable high-set car? I can't even drive the Ford Territory through the shops at Croydon without some drug-addled hippie calling me selfish. Last week at the school, a young tearaway lass said my car was 'a menace'! And to think we worked hard to earn a safe vehicle. If all the pinko hippies got a job and purchased large sturdy automobiles, the world would be a better place.

I can't think of any group of people in history that has been persecuted as much the British motorist. Society has been consciously pushed down into the gutter and a double yellow line painted over it.

Remind me who won the Cold War again?

If they're not busy invading plucky little Georgia, they're destroying football with money or poisoning our teapots. With plutonium. And what does Brown do about it? Got it in one: sweet f.a.

Remember what they said about Wilson, that's all I have to say.

Desmond Carrington played the Black and White Minstrels on his show last week. Followed by Otis Redding. Uncanny.

Wilson? All our royalties from "Blue Monday" went into the f**king Hacienda!

You knew where you were when it used to be "Sir" and "Madam" and "Mr Smythe" and "Mrs Green" and bowing and curtseying, and now you are expected to call everyone Shaz and Myleene and you don't even know if you are addressing a man, a woman, or even one of those Polacks or coloureds throwing your first name around like a dark-skinned youth in a knife-crammed designer tracksuit regurgitating the semi-digested tatters of society into the gutter after his thirtieth alcopop of the morning on the bus to the Job Centre, too much of a wastrel even to do the jobs he has stolen from us, as the school he burnt down wrote him a note excusing him from work in favour of burgling houses to pay for crack and other made-up mental disorders

In my youth I used to have a paper round, imagine my surprise when I realised I could have whored myself out to the Lib Dems completely tax free and at hours that better suited me.

In fact Hampstead Heath is downhill from me so cycling to work would 'always' be fun!

this new board is literally a young child claiming to have been abused by a priest....

it's a bloody shambles....

20 years ago the year was 1988. now we've escalated to 2008. it's a fucking shambles.

The very fact this is my favourite thread on ILX right now is testament to society's downfall.

Society can no longer afford to heat the gutter, it's in the sewer now.

Society is in the sewer, knee deep in sewage to match the sewage in it's mind!

(this thread kicks ass, but the "Have Your Say" thread on the LHC at the BBC website beats it - the difference unfortunately is that those people are serious...)

I haven't seen a neatly starchjed and ironed pinafore in ages. Nowadays, if I did, it would probably be worn backwards. By a boy with a tattoo on his tongue.

For some reason my housemates DON'T lock the door. Considering I haven't even met both of them yet, it feels too early to be cranky about this.

No, it's okay to be angry.
Might as well enjoy being angry now, before you meet your housemates and realize they are mental defectives, then you will feel guilty for being angry. So enjoy it while you can.

yeah, that pretty much validates my theory that the absolute best advice makes you feel better despite a fairly tenuous relationship with the real world

society, it is nothing but a joke!

i fall down the well of chaos and never come out, unlike your baby jessica. i see the maggots at the bottom of the hole. they sharpen their spoons in anticipation! your despair is the dark's dessert!

your suffering is not special enough to be the main course, which of course is the dirt.

Who knew that black metal lyrics and Daily Mail rants had so much in common?

Somebody at this point has to do the "semi-literate screeds of misread occultism, race hate and misogyny...and black metal lyrics aren't much better" gag here and it might as well be me.

Loony Leftie Telford Council snivellingly backtrack on their Park Pervert Patrol Policy.

It is a disgrace. The saucy socialists should be EXTENDING the policy to allow immediate detention of ALL single adults and while we're at it ALL childless couples as well REMEMBER MADDY

These so-called single adults should be out looking for work instead of molesting children in the park.

(xpost) amazing how quickly the "Have Your Say" section of that page disintegrates into a clusterfuck of "why don't you just go and live in Nazi Germany/Stalin's Russia then?"

Only the guilty have nothing to hide.

Them and the Easter Bunny.

for all we know these days the schools are giant houses made of drugsm run by a wicked pete doherty witch,
for our youth, a gaggle of little hansel geldofs and grettel winehouses

With Gary Glitter the janitor.

A drop of snow and this so called information supersociety grinds to a halt. Lest we forget it was God who made the world. Someone somewhere is having a right old chuckle.

society is in the gutter, which is full of snow, which isn't like the snow, you had, in my day.

Where was the orange ball in Liverpool v Chelsea v snow yesterday?

orange balls, jumpers for goalposts, clacking fans, flat caps, simpler days

Society is in the gutter

Nowadays, the only children who can kick a ball in the street are the children of MPs who have claimed that ball on expenses. The rest will be lucky if they don't get sent to Afghanistan.

Do not feed the trollumnist.

"booze-fuelled urine flowing over poppies"

"Culprits have learnt to claim victim status"

"Conscience has been outsourced"

"having more children with a variety of fathers meant a rising tide of cash payments"

This guy hits the trifecta and then some

"British state rewards unmarried mothers with a level of benefits most would be unable to earn in legal employment. They are incentivised to go solo."

Good. Grief.

"after 12 years of his New Labour project, the respect to which Mr Blair referred is in the sewer."

It's only funny until you get to "When Labour forced through its disastrous policy of mass immigration, what respect did it show to the millions of indigenous working-class voters whose communities would come under serious strain as a result? Did anyone explain the true consequences, rather than just the bogus benefits?" and then it's like WTF.

imo this thread is jhosheas finest moment

No quibbles there, except that after 12 years of his New Labour project, the respect to which Mr Blair referred is in the sewer.

Has Randall even been to Fratton Park Sewers this season

xp no kidding- this in particular:

One time I found a dead dog in the street. There was a boy, not much older than me, crying. I asked is this your dog. He just looked at me. Later we fought in the war together.

― ice crӕm, 25 August 2008 21:16 (1 year ago) Bookmark

i mean, i'd read that book.

It's only funny until you get to "When Labour forced through its disastrous policy of mass immigration, what respect did it show to the millions of indigenous working-class voters whose communities would come under serious strain as a result? Did anyone explain the true consequences, rather than just the bogus benefits?" and then it's like WTF.

― Space Battle Rothko (Matt DC), Friday, 6 November 2009 14:57 (1 hour ago) Bookmark

Randall has form for this type of crap.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/personal-view/3642192/Labour-treats-Britain-with-criminal-contempt.html

May I congratulate the liberal intelligentsia for the direction they have taken this country in the past forty-odd years. Society? Hardly, or not as I understand the word anyway. This is monitored anarchy! Law and Order has been made redundant. It's all 'Rights' before retribution. Send in the social worker.
Many years ago, we opened doors for women, offered our seats etc, said 'please' and 'thank-you'. Today it's all old hat. We try and murder pregnant school girls! But for Mr Hall, they would have succeeded. A ray of hope.
Would you rather live in my world, or what we have clearly got today?
I have the telephone number of our local Funeral director written down, for when it's needed. The saddest thing is that I won't be sad to leave. 21st century Britain? I hope you enjoy it.

- Michael, Longfield, Kent UK, 05/12/2009 15:05

in the past forty-odd years

That would include the 18 years when the country was governed by the Conservatives?

ha. reminds me - the mail has a classic feature today about how you used to be able to kick a ball in the street;

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1233767/Not-Xbox-sight-The-TV-series-gloriously-evokes-children-played-days-Nanny-State-killjoys.html

that article... where to start...

this thread is all-time ILX top 20

Yep, you don't get threads like this anymore.

wilful gangs of internet thieves have literally stolen these threads and joyridden them at pensioners

Time was you could laugh at a Parish Priest! Nowadays all the parish priests have been flung into jail. God doesn't mean anything to these people.

The erosion of children's outdoor play started with the increase in road traffic from the late 1950s onwards.

So not liberal do-gooding 'elf and safety fascists then?

Meanwhile, BBC News blames curtain-twitching, paedo-scaping fearmongers for the lack of balls being kicked in the street.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8399749.stm

The only balls being kicked in the street these days are those contained in the scrotal sacs of decent hard-working men and women by New Labour Nanny State Benefit Scroungers high on cheap supermarket cider

It's a shambles how Britons are being denied the right to kick a ball in the street. That said, I bet if there were a ball to kick, it would be the immigrants getting first dibs while good honest working Brits would have to fill out a form.

there was a time when a man could order a food in a place and be assured of proper health and decency. now you are liable only to receive a hummus, which consists of little but mashed expectations and inexpensive cow seasonings. there was a time when a decent man could not look upon a hummus without weeping.

i have seen kids kicking a ball in the street a couple of times this year. this is fancy london tho.

if you look closer, its not a ball, but the still-beating heart of john bull, and the kids, are actually muslims

there was a time when your local bun man and bootblack were not liable to have opinions that interfered with the chores they were contracted to perform. what opinions they had were almost certain to be of a cheerful sort suitable to their labors.

there was a time when the balls that unmolested children kicked in the street were made only of india rubber. india rubber. and it meant something.

suitable to their labors

Education education education was Blair's mantra as he stood on the doorstep of No. 10 and yet, after 50 years of Labour government, we are a nation of under-educated feral thugs, who grunt an incomprehensible argot learned from the latest "rap" 45, in between "downloading" pornography to our mobile phones and "happy slapping" old age pensioners dozing fitfully at bus stops while waiting to board crime-ridden bendy buses to take them to their lives of terror on sink council estates

Quite incorrect, Thomas, quite incorrect. In my day, times was you didn't need twenty years of liberal bias training to do a decent day's work. Overeducation is what's going on, and not enough birch for my liking.

To be fair, I can see why the Education Secretary would be against kicking Balls in the street.

Though most of the House of Commons (both sides of the House) would be very much in favour

so long as it were someone else's balls. where they're concerned, it's always someone else's balls.

Overeducation is what's going on, and not enough birch for my liking.

The problem is these so-called liberals and their sneers and innuendo have blackened the very idea of a Christian Brother innocently caning the bare buttocks of young boys so's to inculcate the correct Latin verb endings. What sordid minds these people must have.

And anyway universities are all David Beckham Studies and Robson Green Fellowships and urinating on war memorials, open to all comers and full of Moslems preaching anti-Western propaganda

They've besmirched the great tradition of the Robson Green Fellowship if you ask me.

The standards required to obtain a "degree" today are on a par with the minimum that we would be expected to know when I matriculated from Primary School and narrowly failed the Eleven Plus. I knew boys in Secondary Modern who knew more about Deleuze and Guattari's concept of rhizomes than these youths swanning around their PhD courses and disinterring war heroes in order to quite literally kick their balls around in the street.

eh that's actually true, can we get a mod edit?

Used to be a parent could kick a child in the street...

an ilxor could organise a fap for their birthday and then turn up for it.

Finns coming over here, ignoring our FAPs

hello ken!

Society can't even consign itself to the dustbin anymore without first having to undergo the rigmarole of sorting itself into plastics, cans and newspaper.

We didn't have plastics when I was a lad. Everything was made out of wood. Even the trees.

Even the clothes pegs

even the erect penii

(Hi DL! How's it going?)

ken c - not bad - working in london now for the forseeable future, so should be able to make the next fap you organise.

ha i might not turn up to it myself though

whereabouts you work/live?

still live in hitchin. currently working in old street, but gonna be switching to kings x soon.

Remember when people were able to spell The King's Cross without resorting to the gutter vernacular of the mobile telephone.

Let's put the Great back into Great Britain and the, errrrrr, Cross back into King's Cross

gr8 britain

anyway, a job used to be for life. for life. now people don't even know where they work any more. politicians, for example, seem to think they're wet nurses these days, while the rest of us gather up what few rags and tassels are left of society to sew pete doherty a new tourniquet.

xpost it's gr8 bri10 get wiv da tymez yo

xposts

Time was, this thread fulfilled a valuable service by concerning itself with our society and the gutter it has fallen into. Now it's just the liberal intelligentsia getting all chummy with each other.

Get chummy with anyone these days, especially over the internet, and you are liable to find yourself on the Big Government Nanny State Sex Offender's List, with council officials breaking down your door in order to forcibly extract DNA from you, which is exactly what should be happening to these perverts because only those who've got something to hide should fear ... uhhhh... hold on, can I start again?

Time was you could send your kids up to sweep chimneys, these days they're literally being put through the hatches of recycling banks to steal second-hand clothing. Britain is lying in the gutter, in pieces, broken.

in my day, a man kept his business to himself. he didn't have to worry about getting constantly bombarded with such utter rubbish as what such and such as person "tweeted." what the bloody hell is a "tweet?" If I have to hear one more time what Stephen Fry had for breakfast, I will eat my hat!
which, by the way, has lost its starch, and is sagging down flabbily, just like society

Derbyshire PCT video - festive warning to young women don't get totally drunk and pee in the street and fall over

video
http://www.youtube.com/user/Cocktalesmix#p/a/u/1/xfWs6GaImzU

"Mary would never normally drop her knickers in the middle of town but she really needs to go, and after 10 alcopops she's lost it. If you don't want to end up in a Cocktale like Mary, know the tricks—get the right mix."

Society is literally being pissed into our gutters by a youth

The youth has drunk too much of society's blood, from the neck of a pensioner, and is now pissing away that blood without concern for the society he or she drenches

...with its own blood. Think about it!

vera lynn never pissed in any gutters. we've lost something, i don't know what, but it was precious.

The gutter is in the gutter, and that gutter is in another gutter, and society is in that gutter, so society is in the gutter gutter gutter.

multigutteral britain

Teenagers are literally taking the piss out of you, and then actually pissing that piss into the gutter.

gutter gutter gutter gutter gutter gutter gutter gutter BATMAN

It's the immigrants who shouldered out all the honest British ragpickers. Now rag picking is a racket, just like all the rest, and what's more they won't give you a decent price anymore for an honest rag of cloth.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2waIvp265CM

watch till the end

"my mum would fucking cut you"

Just another bus ride in Peckham.

that's like a sketch from Jam

fuck ing hell

what's phenomenal is how camp the guy is

"alison moyet shut your fucking mouth"

How do you do that? How do you walk right through a glass door on a bus and come through the other side without even being hurt?

Makes me so glad I live 300 yards away in the relative safety of Peckwich.

oh god the comments

"Oh fuckin' ell, where's our bus?" is a great line to punctuate the clip with.

jeffo7731
2 hours ago 3

That's why taxis don't go south of the river! LOL

even without sound that's .... quite something

munib1000
10 hours ago

Shit if this was Harrow that boy would be dashed off the bus with his gay voice

Is that the lad from Steps?

it seems the gutter has had to have been extended to accomodate Big Society.

School frocks are now worn exclusively by degenerates and call girls, while the schoolgirls display their lewdness in the broad light of day like a badge of honor.

Would like to punch the lads filming it tbh. That high pitched laughing!! Half thought they'd chase him down the street. Shudder. Whole thing = craziness!

"I saw Steve lying down, but thankfully he's not bad. A big well done to the Sunderland fans who gave up the supporter to the police. When I saw the age of him it looked like he's still in school. Unfortunately it's the society we live in at the moment."

society is in the gutter, attacking the old men who play between the posts in our great football clubs

tbh he brought it on himself by using goalposts instead of jumpers.

<3 this thread

takes me back what it does

that were good

You don't see people sit out on the porch much. Kids certainly don't play in the street anymore. And when we do venture outside, we climb in our cars, crank the A/C and the radio, pick up the cell and don't even bother to honk our horns.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/01/14/AR2011011406549.html

Time was we would venture outside, climb in our cars, crank the A/C and the radio, pick up our cells, and not even bother to honk our horns.

Now however nobody would even pick up their car keys without first raping every one of their neighbours and ending the ordeal with a moneyshot of sulphuric acid.

Bus stops.

"We are losing the art of letter writing. E-mails are becoming like texts. If we don't get a handle on it, future generations won't be able to spell at all."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-12247262

if only everyone was a spelling stickler, what beautiful words would be spoken.

Have you heard the music these days? It's all "ooh ooh" this and "shhhhhhhwaaaaaahhhhhhh". Future generations won't be able to open their mouths without literally killing their neighbors to death.

the country's full of rotten teeth and rotten guts. living in a bogswamp, eating cheap food and the streets paved with dust, horsedung and consumptives' spits.

I've been banned from my local pub for not being Polish. Inclusivity my arse!

Think they own the place

I mean, I think they actually own the place

In the old days if you got on the wrong side of a German you would find a bomb dropped on your city. You knew where you were. Today if you could even find that same German, chances are he'd be in panorama bar with the little woman.

Fact of the matter is, you're just a statistic

http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/feb2011/9/8/image-3-for-sunday-mirror-pictures-06-02-11-gallery-580059926.jpg

Britain’s Eurovision hopeful Antony Costa unfastens his trousers then casually urinates against a cash machine.

The singer – whose group Blue were chosen to represent the country in the song contest just three days earlier – is ­pictured near Trafalgar Square, only 30 yards from a ­public toilet.

The 29-year-old father of one relieves himself while deep in conversation on his mobile phone, leaving a pool of urine on the ­pavement.

After finishing the call, he ­reaches into his back pocket for his ­wallet.

He eventually re-fastens his ­trousers – with total indifference to other people needing to use the Post Office cash machine – after withdrawing a wad of notes.

Touting for the French vote.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5h9ZPBuBEs

^^ that is probably nsfw, btw

He eventually re-fastens his trousers – with total indifference to other people needing to use the Post Office cash machine – after withdrawing a wad of notes. LAD.

He has literally pissed over every hard-working family that uses the Post Office. An animal would know better.

It's clear from his face he has demanded Winston Churchill forces his mouth open, and delightedly pumped urine down the great man's gullet. As a final "one in the eye" for Britain, he "shakes" the remaining droplets on the corpse of a soldier, abandoned in Oxford Street by Tony Blair.

No sooner has he refastened his trouser cord than he's at it again, this time the pop hopeful "has a wank" at the home of music legend Robin Gibb, who has diabetes.

When I was a kid I didn't have an XBox, or Wii. I had a bike and a curfew (the street lights). Mum didn't call my mobile, she yelled outside, "time to come in". I played outside with friends, not Online. If I didn't eat what my mum made me then I didn't eat. Hand sanitizer didn't exist, but you COULD get your mouth washed out with soap. Re-post this if you drank water out of a hose...and survived!

(from facebook)

Music? Nowadays people just listen to computers.

^ A+

At least when you drank water out of a hose it tasted like water. Now it just tastes like plastic. Why can't you buy a proper tomato anymore, these ones just taste like water.

My mother's voice literally was our dinnerbell.

I played outside with friends, not Online.

Argument slightly undermined by being posted, er, online.

If I didn't eat what my mum made me then I didn't eat.

And if you got rickets and kwashiorkor, then that was your lookout, parents instilled personal responsibilty in their malnourished kids in those days

As a taxpayer, you're lucky to be drinking from the pipe without a hefty fine from the cowboy hose police.

We've lost the meaning of vowels

Hosepipe ban is ridiculous I mean it only rained last Tuesday for goodness sake and don't try to tell me it didn't because I remember getting soaked on the way back from paying my newspaper money to the Pakistani lad in the corner shop.

It's a new kind of person comes in the shop now. They're the ones buying things. If it wasn't for them we'd be bust. Neighborhood's changed. Used to be all British people here, now look at it.

It doesn't rain enough. The only reason my garden doesn't look like a French holiday camp is thanks to the youths pissing on my lawn. You could take your dog for walks.

Thought this revival was going to be about a Daily Mail article today about the 14 year old who died at a party in West London:

But one of her teachers blamed her downward spiral on an addiction to the internet.
J@ye Williams@n, who was Isobel’s English teacher at Chiswick Community College, in west London, said: ‘She was into the kind of things that teenagers get into, but she got hooked on the worldwide web. She was part of the Myspace generation. She got caught and we are devastated.’

Not linking to the distasteful article - but people speaking to papers should keep a respectful silence.

This is what happens when you ride recklessly down the super information highway.

But in seriousness, I googled the article and, yep, it's fucked.

Fucking hell, that's my old school.

Daily Mail article is predictably grim reading.

in my day teenagers used the "word wide web" responsibly and were educated enough not to get trapped in metaphors, this is gordon brown's fault

It's a shameful indictment of today's skew-whiff standards, but we have to face the fact that social workers can and will administrate the force-feeding of drugs to children nowadays.

We had sad 'kinda lol but mostly sad'-expressions on our faces here when we heard the teacher literally say this to the BBC cameras yesterday.

It was on the 10 o'clock news btw

the social fabric has been literally rent apart and communication with one's fellows is all but impossible. each day I see teenagers and pensioners fall to blows in the streets over their inability to smoothly navigate around one another in shop entrances and on sidewalks. they're little better than the packs of wolves that swoop in to chase them off of a fresh carcass, they are.

oh god that teacher, she actually said there was "too much knowledge".

In my day it was learning timetables and capitals of the empire by rote, and THAT WAS IT. Kids nowadays learn on the internet how to drug themselves into a coma.

what happened? society used to be something you could point to and feel proud, like a boat. now you need to consult with three government clerks and a panel of so-called experts just to find out where the damn thing is, and by the time you get there it's likely closed early for Ramadan. unfathomable! they've literally gone beyond the pale!!!

what calls itself "society" today wouldn't have passed muster on the playground when I was growing up! we used to form up ranks and march all through the school grounds showing off our fathers' guns; in fact, we liberated a good deal of France that way before any of us even realized what was going on. nowadays, if teens line up at all, it's for the grand opening of some new sex shop or 'fusion' restaurant. no thank you!

society literally could not be any worse if you took a hammer to it — but good luck finding one that doesn't fall apart in your hand on the walk home!

dying

everything worthy of the name "society" breathed its last sometime in the 1980s. they've kept it alive on a machine ever since, so that friends and relatives might still enjoy the simple pleasures of holding hands and stroking hair. but now they're going to unplug it, because someone thinks that money would be better spent funding sex-change operations for vicious stray mutts who are, they tell us, only lashing out at the world because they're "confused". well they're not the only ones!!!

wish i hadn't search out that teacher article in the mail now. led me to the story of the goalkeeper who got punched

club owners say "he will be banned from the club until further notice"

How about for fucking life? the prick.

btw, the goalkeeper won't be banned obv

Someone on my Facebook linked to that teacher article saying that the first thing they thought of when they heard about it was Summer Heights High's Mr G, which strikes me as a grimly accurate observation

Society is my friend
He makes me lie down
In a cool blood bath

Drinking.

..now a rich man's sport.

a poor man's coke.

HI PETER

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/peteroborne/100095686/david-cameron-is-in-the-sewer-because-of-his-news-international-friends/

Top comment:

"I'm not a Conservative. I loathe Tory scum. So I'm biased.

However I respect the Telegraph for NOT being News International and having higher standards of journalism.

This reminds me why.

I genuinely hope everyone working for News International; and their moronic readership; chokes on their own vomit and dies tonight. So we have plenty of space to bring in lots of decent hard working immigrants to replace the vile parasitic scum."

"Yours, Nick Clegg"

LOL

Old man yells at litter.

I was just about to agree with him about Oxford Road and then i got to this: No one has ever told them that to eat or drink in the street is a degraded thing to do; and if they were told it would only make it more attractive to them, for what more sincere expression of sympathy for those who suffer from bad behaviour is there than imitation of it?

http://www.technovelgy.com/graphics/content10/t-herman-zweibel.jpg

Theo Dalrymple, earlier today

woops

http://www.technovelgy.com/graphics/content10/t-herman-zweibel.jpg

A fair proportion of the students carried a plastic bottle, complete with something uncommonly like a dummy's teat, as if global warming had transformed the road into the Sahara Desert.

Think he's seeing mirages here- wtf at the "dummy's teat" bit?

those self-closing sucky tops on sports bottles, i don't like them much either

i am liking this "real men only drink when they're sat down" shtick tho

Umberto Eco said somewhere that people who chew gum are disgusting savages. Obviously he's not close friends with Alex Ferguson.

I hate chewing gum with a fierce passion.

Shit Dalrymple's written a whole book about this.

I'd guess he's probably not a fan of other modern innovations e.g. the iPod, the internet, female suffrage

A whole book! Better not be rubbish...

I'm feeling very good about society of late and feel that maybe it really is out of the gutter and perhaps we over-reacted a little when we thought it was there, things aren't so bad!

I don't like violent youths, however I respect their right to express themselves. Society is literally looking more positive than ever.

I recently said hello to a man.

A knife was not brandished.

I sometimes think the problem is with me and not society, i got home early from work yesterday and the knifes were all in the drawer where they should be, perhaps i was a little harsh on the EU regulations regarding that after all!

I'm not in favour of everything the EU does, however they must work very hard, who would begrudge them a small amount of praise for their efforts??

and the little woman was playing the steve o'sullivan 12"s in the garden for our neighbours. she hadn't put them on ebay at all! bless her little cotton socks. and i learned, just because our neighbours are socialists doesn't stop them enjoying a good tune

Old men will have shards of society hurled at them, that's a given. Why when I was young we did the same. It's up to us to pick them up afterwards and say "back to the chair old friend".

I have to say it got me in such a good mood i went and cleared the whole back garden and found a load of balls. umbro, gola, mitre, kappa and a really pretty french looking one! I uploaded them all onto rapidshare and then put the link on lots of 3rd world forums so the children of malawi will be able to kick them all around once they download them.

At this rate I'm starting to think more children than ever may soon kick a ball in the street. It's a bloody miracle.

Though those that choose not to are learning valuable skills on their home consoles and computers.

I'm going to upload them a copy of our street but our internet connection doesn't seem to be up to it. I know Virgin Media have been working hard on this though, it must be difficult working under that much pressure and angry calls from people. the little woman says we should upload it in the middle of the night, so as not to hog the bandwidth that our neighbours might need

I saw on televisions some of the young lads ripping up society into shreds. boys will be boys!

but who is to say that other young lads won't pick up those shards and make new forms of society that are more interesting and equitable than what went before. Sometimes things are for the best, its just not immediately apparent!

20 years ago you knew where you were. It was frequently stifling however, what about those who were marginalised by what was at the time a more narrow society? For example men who dress up as women or people who aren't white. Those lads certainly would disagree if I was to claim things are at their worst now.

The postman is gay and good luck to him.

in 1975 i was jailed for murdering a swan. it wouldn't happen today! yet some might argue that's a positive thing. i certainly could see their point of view.

http://www.castlebar.ie/board/2009/jul09/181545.htm

Society still teetering perilously close to the gutter in some towns

downtown calcutta has improved seriously over the years.

50 years ago the little woman was a teddy boy, ah she looked fine in those days, but it didn't last long - another genre came along and it was all forgotten but now when the little woman is playing a set i feel like all those boundaries have melted into air and she can move between genres with the grace of a jellyfish, with its magical combination of structure and seeming randomness and its ability to live in shallow waters or deep waters

i told her yesterday that the most recent of her sets i heard was kind of like a metaphor for the potential of society itself, fluid and with momentum, i said "this is what we could make society into!"

2/3 years ago i used to lament the state of this country, indeed i'd tell anyone who'd listen that society was in the gutter. however i may have been harsh, the met office can't be expected to predict all the weather and previous predictions were largely correct in that they involved sun, rain, and clouds. on reflection i must concede that the weather is a law unto itself and is our real "enemy" here.

however if the weather was sitting here now i'd be tempted to let bygones be bygones and enjoy a large cake.

not the best out there today. no complaints here mind you.

Imagine what we could achieve in society if everyone just stopped being dicks.

A very negative view.

A man I worked with was struck by a bus in 2007. Perhaps that may change your perspective.

15 hours ago I was tired and a little cranky and i admit i was a bit off with the little woman when i couldn't find Top Shelf Dubs (one of Steve's best imo and a highlight of the mosaic back catalogue), but today i feel as grand as as basking monitor lizard in a luxury zoo, its amazing what a good nights sleep will do, put things in perspective for me. sometimes i think we all need a bit of a sleep each night

one mans dick is another mans lab technician - sometimes you have to see another persons point of view!

I was also struck by a bus in 2007, how beautiful it was.

Of course, todays buses are not as pretty but they get more people on them and are faster and more plentiful.

That's another way to be struck.

^ Henry Blofeld

The stray cat on my room got adopted.

on my road, I do mean.

We could sit all day and moan about society and where would it get us. No doubt youths are attacking pensioners across the country, I'll not lose sleep over it though, to each his own.

all well and good on a fine day like today, but i wouldn't be after getting carried away either.

There were purses snatched during communion in ballindine the last day. Communion! And i heard this morning that a girl in kilmeena has gotten herself 'in trouble'. Now, it wasn't the wind she picked that up from so it wasn't.

Maybe kicking a ball in a room can be just as beneficial as kicking one in the road.

i don't really have a problem with assad, people have to do things the way they think best and if its working for him, who am i to judge?

And he is, relatively, still a youngish lad with much to learn. Sometimes we need to let people make a mistake or two along the way and not be quite so quick to criticize

i don't really have a problem with diouf, people have to do things the way they think best and if its working for him, who am i to judge?

And he is, relatively, still a youngish lad with much to learn. Sometimes we need to let people make a mistake or two along the way and not be quite so quick to criticize

The thing about sectarianism is well boys will be boys, me and the little woman had a few of the sectarian lads for tea the other week and they were good as gold

The thing about sectarianism is well boys will be boys, me and the little woman had a few of the sectarian lads round for tea the other week and they were good as gold

I get a lot of pizza leaflets, I am always grateful. It's good to know that the pizza market is so competitive.

I know nothing about the multitude of races and creeds streaming into the UK on a daily basis. No doubt the lot of them are criminals and undesirables, ready to knife a sheep - penis. Yet a quick look at the papers and you might feel our own lot are no better. Discarded cigarette butts outside the bank. Dogs. The lot.

Let them in I say.

steady now

I used to think the IRA were a better class of terrorist however some of these many Hindus who have targeted the west seem reasonable folks. A friend of mine, Ron Knowles, had a similar beard to both the IRA and Hindu terrorists. Ron was no terrorist though, he worked in an abattoir murdering pigs with a bolt gun.

RIP Ron, yet let me reiterate I bear no ill will to the youths who burned you alive. A shame they'll never be released, their whole lives ahead of them.

My car was stolen the other day. At first I was angry but then I thought, no, whoever stole it must have needed it very badly - much more than I will ever know.

And anyway - who needs a car when walking to places helps stop lead poisoning and things?

Right now I'm more concerned that in stealing my car, the perpetrator could catch lead poisoning - he (or she) could be a father (or mother).

its amazing what a good nights sleep will do, put things in perspective for me. sometimes i think we all need a bit of a sleep each night

― post, Wednesday, August 17, 2011 10:51 AM (59 minutes ago) Bookmark

I've had my share of run-ins with society over the years. As a young man I never did understand the need for such a byzantine tangle of rules and regulations; but now I can see, by the very fact that I sit here at this computer, using my hard-won & court-mandated typing proficiency to tell you all this story, that there were some very important things being done in those buildings which it was in society's best interest to keep me from setting alight.

"back to the chair old friend"

30 years ago a child would kick a ball on the street.

all-time.

That you sirs may think we have risen as a society, does not change the fact that we have felt the gutter's warmth, one that will always be there.

Back when the stain of the gutter's refuse had yet to dull our society's bibstraps, a baseball card collection belonged in a child's bicycle spokes, and old dog paws could skitter and scatter, its tongue lolling on a sidewalk-plated fried egg. Yes, the days were hot, but nothing was on fire, nothing was ever on fire in those days, so the hydrants roamed free, across all. But just this morning a car honked at me, as I walked across the freeway, as I am wont to do, and I could not even see the driver through the dirty windshield. I went outside for a breath of the air of my youth and collapsed back onto my bed with lungs greased with the gutter. I went to sleep on unwashed sheets, the sheets of today's society.

why just yesterday I looked at a cat

I don't need to tell you that love doesn't exist in a space as open as the gutter, why, there are two whole sides open

Time was, a man could go out and fall in love, right out there, in society. Grow his beard, as they would say. Now, no one says much anymore, it's quiet there, outside.

i had a 'sweet' potato the other week

Terrible. Why just the other day I asked my grandson how life was for him, I went "Matthew, how are the potatoes of life" and I don't even need to tell you how he responded!

my son asked me for a potato and i gave him a small stone

too soon

thirty years ago it was too late, now all you hear is "too soon, too soon"

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/111/314159278_d8165ee834.jpg

no doubt a pensioner was knifed.

this thread has made me realize who "post" is

i have a guess

sure but who is the little woman

we all had names, I know that much. and if you wanted to figure out someone's place in the world, all you'd have to do was ask him his name. Little Tinker was the mechanic's son. and the milkman's son, he was Splosh, of course. Mrs. Stevens' son Killer, what a gentle boy he was, never hurt a soul in his life, but he marched right up those gallows steps on the day he turned 18, because that was his name, that was his destiny, he never questioned it.

these days you see a group of boys playing kickball in the park, you cry out, "Hey Taco! Ho Huntley! How's the weather down there, little Darby?" and nobody answers. not a peep. maybe they don't have names anymore. maybe they're just numbers, symbols, bleeps and bloops on a mobile telephone. I wouldn't even recognize them anymore.

wau

"Splosh"!!!

At this rate I'm starting to think more children than ever may soon kick a ball in the street. It's a bloody miracle.

Not sure which is better, this or the postman is gay

Yesterday I came across a group of children raising funds to make improvements to the gutters of Society. A little boy with a hook carefully pinned a ribbon on my shirt. My heart was literally warmed.

Friend, the children of today cannot eat cold hearts

Careful, you blink whatever is on your face, and suddenly you begin to call the stains on your unwashed dinner plate the plate itself and the mold that grows upon the stains is called the food. You call your feet your feet, but they no longer can slide into whatever you cover them with because it is not yesterday. "Why," you will say to yourself "just yesterday I wore a pair of shoes." Where are they now, I ask you

why did they put garbage all over thr oad!? and they say the institution is takin gover their foul streets! they would sooner see their own excrement than a clean building!

sometimes I think it's the holidays I miss the most—real, genuine holidays, the sort we used to have, when you'd go to the store with a friend to pick out presents for one another, rip apart the packaging and have a go at them there in the aisles, and not a thing the shopkeeper could do—hell, he was probably right alongside you, joining in the Michaelmas spirit!

course, Society was healthy enough in those days to handle a good scare every now and again. try that sort of thing these days, you're liable to get a swift boot in the jaw from an immigrant with no respect for the traditions of this great nation.

I liek candy

What's happening to buildings- real, proper, buildings? Used to be, you needed an office you built an office, so many bricks high, so many bricks wide, door in front, bob's your uncle. Now every school and hospital has to be run through the modern "art" nazis to feng shui the cure of the roof! It's madness, proper madness! Architects? Just gay engineers, I say!

California-based Cleese, 71, moved to the U.S. more than two decades ago.

What's with the photo accompanying that article, Cleese's head's looks like it's been pasted in from another photo - Terry Gilliam style!

man...

I mean, I love having different cultures around. But when the parent culture kind of dissipates, you're left thinking, "Well, what's going on?"'

Cleese: "What happened? I am confused"

Christ, that's some sad shit...

England used to be a lot more English. When I moved away from England to spread our cultural wealth in the 90s, you could still run into a Londoner on the streets of London. Now, London is full of people who aren't Londoners.

When he rocked up to LA all those years ago was he all: "Where are all the Americans, you know, the original hamburger-gobbling, baseball cap wearing Americans of my youth? I'm all for this new-fangled tolerance thing but when LA loses its parent culture, I have to say, there's something wrong here..."

Limey Go Home (to Somerset)

the gutter has shifted dramatically, society now has to apply to the local loony lefty council for a halting bay in which to lower itself

So sad when cool people get old and start spouting crap like this. I don't think it's actually intended as a racist/righty statement, it's just something in the old grey matter that starts making itself more and more known as they get older. Like that Elton John thing where he said comething along the lines of all new music being rubbish, not like the seventies when 20 amazing albums came out every week

Looting and rioting used to be just a pure, good olde English passing of time. Now it's violent and, by god, non-London (looking) people are involved in looting and rioting too. They are ruining it for the real Londoners.

Of course these days you're not even allowed to call it a gutter. You have to call it a "patio parameter drainage facility or otherwise". "Patio" because otherwise it's offensive to the French. We won't know where we are in ten years time...

don't know where "or otherwise" came from. kind of like it there.

Cleese was funny once, but he's always been a bit of a dick. A Liberal Democrat, in fact.

"Patio" because otherwise it's offensive to the French.

Hahaha.

La société est dans le caniveau gouttière!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/wirecopy/8728203/Storm-in-a-tea-cup-as-Earl-Gray-fans-complain-at-new-recipe.html

I sometimes drink that, tho I drink the decaff one, the caffeine is prob why they're all so narky.

Immigrants have children for benefits

Joan Collins to the rescue: Brutally honest actress spells out how to put Britain back on its feet

I thought making a book out of an ILX thread was verboten?

I saw that Joan Collins link and I thought "that's GOT to be the daily mail" and what do you know

LOL the quality of her handwriting has a lower limit, reached only as a last defense against grave indignities.

He tossed another form at me and turned away, leaving me speechless with fury and scribbling the word 'British' in the worst handwriting I could muster.

Way to go, Joan Collins, for taking all the fun out of this thread

She's sounding increasingly like her brother Phil there.

"Even the F-word is commonplace among youngsters. As a child, it was only when I saw it written on a railway carriage that I asked: ‘Mummy what does f *** mean?’ The poor darling went ballistic, hissing: ‘That is the most terrible word in the English language, if your father ever used it I would divorce him.’

vs.

"Poor Monica, she will forever be remembered as the Count of Monte Cristo... give or take a vowel."

escapes on a technicality

what age did you first say "fuck"?

thread needs to get back on track. I remember this thread when it was all pithy comment on how bad things have gotten. Look at it now. A shambles, a disgrace. They should fly the flag at half-mast, but they have instead used to flag to decorate the table of a £600 PER WEEK flat in central london where JOBLESS IMMIGRANT LESBIANS play PLAYSTATIONS bought out of TAXPAYER'S MONEY.

Migrants and ethnics are now being paid NOT to keep-up their garden. Madness!

Stupid fucking country full of cunts, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrgggggggggghhhh!

It's no different from when I was a kid. We used to get caught hanging round street corners licking our own balls.

Headline: "Children behaving like animals, Barnardo's survey finds"

THIS IS NOT WHAT THE SURVEY FINDS

I rember a time that even murderers had breeding, you had to be Lord Lucan or Dr. Crippen before your misdemeanours showed up in the society notices, why now they'll print the foul deeds of just anybody, bold as brass there on the front page. Cuntish, I call it, cuntish.

STOP PRESS: HEADLINE HAS BEEN REVISED

Barnardo's volunteer project worker Natasha Cripps, who commissioned the research, said the word "feral" indicated a complete desertion of young people.

or alternatively, that thick people use it as a synonym for "badly behaved" because they read newspapers doing the same