Movies to play to seduce a date.

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Inspired by the current "discussion" on this thread.

I was saying to a friend of mine that like every guy I've ever had sex with almost has like, on first time coming up to my apartment, gone through my DVD collection and put on a movie. Why is this? Is it to pretend that you didn't come up to have sex, you came up to watch tv and, whoa, sex! I mean that's not very sensible and it's transparent. Or are these movies really meant to be background to sex? Because I once had a boy put on American Psycho which seems to be a v. clearly frightening message to give out! So, do you do this? And if so what movie would you put on? Obv. you are going to watch almost none of the movie as you will stop watching within 20 minutes of putting it on to resume making out and having sex.

(NB: the most common choice in my collection seems to be The Matrix??? I'm not sure why)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:53 (twenty years ago) link

(And my friend, after informing me he's never actually done this, told me he'd put on Schindler's List)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:54 (twenty years ago) link

My friends copy of Stalker has 'perfect first date movie' written on it. It isn't though; no no isn't no.

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:56 (twenty years ago) link

The almost up there is in the wrong place, it should read "almost every guy I've had sex with" not "every guy I've almost had sex with", because that's a completly different category, I reckon they watch Winnie the Pooh.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:56 (twenty years ago) link

I had an ex-g.f. put on Breakfast at Tiffany's once, and she tried to, uh, touch me in my bathing suit area. I put a stop to that, and told her that the movie isn't really any good anyhow, since the George Peppard character is actually gay.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:57 (twenty years ago) link

If someone came over and picked a movie to play and then partway through decided he was gonna try to have sex with me I'd be all like "What?! I thought you wanted to watch this!"

I am a really frustrating date (or boyfriend), I guess.

― Chris P (Chris P), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:57 (twenty years ago) link

(As an aside:
I know what you want, and I know what you need
But I'm goin' screw it up, yeah
Cause I'm an idiot, and I'm your boyfriend, yes I am
I'm goin' take you out, and leave my wallet home
Then I use your cell phone, baby
Long distance, and I'm your boyfriend
Baby I know I'm a man who's made mistakes
I still got some learning to do
I made out with your best friend the other day, and
Now we're best friends too
Yeah Yeah
And I know what you want, and I know what you need
But I'm goin' screw it up, yeah
Cause I'm an idiot, and I'm your boyfriend, yes I am
And I'm goin' get you a gift, Hey! But its something I like too
Hope you like this Norelco beard trimmer with my name on it,
And I'm your boyfriend
Goin' Get real drunk,
And call my baby up at four o'clock in the morning
Wake you up
I'm an idiot!
Pick up the phone, come on
I love you
Lets get in my dad's SUV,
And we'll go over to my house, my crib, my pad
I'll tell my mom to go to sleep
Then we'll have the living room all to ourselves, you see
We'll put on some great DVD's I picked up
How bout like, something like the Matrix

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 16:59 (twenty years ago) link

You record your conversations?

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:00 (twenty years ago) link

My video collection is very limited. It'd have to be Dogma or Transformers the Movie or Metallica: Cunning Stunts. But, then you know I'd just figure we were going to watch a movie. I'd probably, get bored with watching TV, and start putting songs on, and not letting them finish. This post is deeply psychological, ha.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:00 (twenty years ago) link

David that's a real song!!

Transformers the Movie is a good choice, jel.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:01 (twenty years ago) link

Except that the problem is that Transformers the Movie is inherently watchable, like the movie in question has to be good but not so good that you wouldn't be able to be distracted for making sex.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:03 (twenty years ago) link

I'd pick "Transformers". Afterwards, I would obviously do you. But you probably wouldn't get a second date.

― Chris P (Chris P), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:04 (twenty years ago) link

To answer the question honestly, um, I don't think I would ever try seduce anyone really. But if I did, I figure seduction is all about manipulation of the person's feelings so they feel a bit / lot more conducive towards having sex and stuff. Last film I watched that actually physiologically made the girl (she was my girlfriend at the time) and me want to have sex was Secretary. I imagine something like All the Real Girls would put someone more in the state of mind to fall in love (see my thread on it & bnw's comment).

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:06 (twenty years ago) link

WTF? Girls all the time come over to my house and go through my DVDs and choose something really romantic-like such as Amelie or Moulin Rouge and then we sit there and actually watch it all the way through...no funny stuff. I reiterate: WTF?

Oh, and Transformers: The Movie would work cuz then you could be making love and singing "DARE! DARE TO BELIEVE YOU CAN SURVIVE! THE POWER IS ALL IN YOUR COMMAAAAAAND!" at the same time!

Oh wait, I think I remember now why most girls won't have sex with me.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:07 (twenty years ago) link

You don't want to have sex with girls who watch bullshit movies like that, trust me.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:09 (twenty years ago) link

Groundhog Day

bad choice: _Leaving Las Vegas_

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:10 (twenty years ago) link

http://photos.friendster.com/photos/41/27/357214/632519122068l.jpg

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:10 (twenty years ago) link

God that movie is such infuriating bullshit, jesus christ.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:11 (twenty years ago) link

The favorite film-to-sex maneuver with me was when a girl I'd just started seeing brought a copy of Debbie Does Dallas '99(?), which was followed by Bringing Out the Dead. Somewhere around the twenty minute mark of the latter the fun started.

That relationship lasted several months, then we drifted apart and she drifted into porn acting. Ah well. =/

― ham on rye (ham on rye), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:13 (twenty years ago) link

On the Right Track

― Nicolars (Nicole), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

I find booze usually works better than a movie anyhow.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

Pootie Tang

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

You can't do better than Wong-Kar Wai films of course. Esp. the final shots of Fallen Angels and Chungking Express.

― ham on rye (ham on rye), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

"Crash" by David Cronenberg would be a novel choice.

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

Horace, it's so easy to turn Transformers: The Movie into a drinking game...

― Chris P (Chris P), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:16 (twenty years ago) link

I was once seduced during a documentary on Roy Cohn.

― Annouschka Magnatech (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:18 (twenty years ago) link

Pootie Tang works well because you only really need to see the first 25 minutes of that film anyway, in all actuality. It's all downhill after the "Make 'Em Say Uhhhh" scene.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:18 (twenty years ago) link

??? this a weird thing to do even if you're NOT there to have sex

(the correct answer is clash of the titans tho)

― jones (actual), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:18 (twenty years ago) link

Actually, I've found Pootie Tang to be Booty-Repellant, which makes me sad.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:19 (twenty years ago) link

(And my friend, after informing me he's never actually done this, told me he'd put on Schindler's List)

Seeing pain and pogroms never did inspire lust in me. But, hey, whatever....

To really seduce a date? Hmm, Velvet Goldmine works: sex sprinkled everywhere, and if things get slow, you can both trip on the pretty colours....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:19 (twenty years ago) link

Haha maybe you need to be horny to begin with for Pootie Tang to work.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:19 (twenty years ago) link

Maybe it's just the fact that we've watched about 15 times and she always leaves the room when it comes on.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:22 (twenty years ago) link

"...i'm talkin' 'bout GROWN. ASS. WIMMEN."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:23 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, I can see that too.

(FYI all of these movies got turned off when getting busy, who on earth actually wants to stop and watch any part of a movie while having sex??)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:23 (twenty years ago) link

Horace, you can't seduce her, can you? Object: keeping her body in the room....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:24 (twenty years ago) link

Movies that would make me immediately throw out a date:
Amelie
Velvet Goldmine

I'm still not sure why American Psycho didn't provoke this response.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:25 (twenty years ago) link

FYI all of these movies got turned off when getting busy, who on earth actually wants to stop and watch any part of a movie while having sex??)

If he's any good, you won't care about the explosions onscreen. Call it background noise....

I'm still not sure why American Psycho didn't provoke this response.

Bloodlust=lust, maybe?

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:26 (twenty years ago) link

to sidetrack a little bit, any genres better suited than others?

while comedy can be endearing, it is rarely sexy in a very immediate way
romantic movies set expectations too high (who wants to do it standing up, leaning against a pizza oven, while changing the oil filter on a '68 Buick?)
action movies, violence negates sexiness
historical epics, long boring speeches that allow the mind to wander

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:28 (twenty years ago) link

Desperado!

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:29 (twenty years ago) link

Say Anything
Jules and Jim
How High

― bnw (bnw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:29 (twenty years ago) link

I hate romantic movies by and large to begin with, so those are right out.

Background noise=massive dud for me.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:29 (twenty years ago) link

Say Anything is my romantic movie exception :)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:30 (twenty years ago) link

American Psycho was fun for the first 45 minuts, that's why. when the movie goes south, you're distracted by that point.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:30 (twenty years ago) link

So what if they come in and go straight for you p0rn stash?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:31 (twenty years ago) link

I've admitted this:
I got mad laid to "sammy
and rosie get laid"

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:31 (twenty years ago) link

I don't own any porn, so it's a nonissue in my house! That'd be a huge turn off though.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:31 (twenty years ago) link

American Psycho was fun for the first 45 minuts, that's why. when the movie goes south, you're distracted by that point.

And why were you not paying attention to her for 45 minutes?

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:33 (twenty years ago) link

becuase Jude Law Must Die, that's why.

"ooooo, Bone White..."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:33 (twenty years ago) link

oh and in high school
a girl started kissing me
during "flash gordon"

and she was two years
older! Me: "master of the
universe" indeed!

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:34 (twenty years ago) link

I don't own any porn, so it's a nonissue in my house! That'd be a huge turn off though.

Amen! Who wants to see Debbie jiggling on a 30 inch screen?

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:34 (twenty years ago) link

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:35 (twenty years ago) link

FLASH! AAAAH AAAAAH! HE'LL SAVE EVERY ONE OF US! from not getting kisses

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:35 (twenty years ago) link

I'd object to Faces of Death... anything else, well, we'll talk

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:36 (twenty years ago) link

do Elvis movies work well?

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:37 (twenty years ago) link

"Defender of the universe", isn't it?

― Chris P (Chris P), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:37 (twenty years ago) link

elvis movies are too riveting to even eat popcorn to

― jones (actual), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:38 (twenty years ago) link

way back in 1998, I was dating a girl whose roommate owned Cronenberg's Crash. We'd always watch about five minutes of that and then go to her bedroom. Not because the movie made us hot or anything, but because it was kind of boring, and we didn't really have a lot to say to each other.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:39 (twenty years ago) link

"Defender of the universe", isn't it?
maybe he was referring to the "masters of the universe" film, with He-man, Skeletor et al.

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:40 (twenty years ago) link

courteney cox was in it

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:43 (twenty years ago) link

So Traces of Death it is, luna.

Kids somehow worked for me. Maybe it had more to do with the drugs done than the movie watched. That Van Damme hockey movie--Sudden Death?--was boring enough to work.

Hmm...Meet the Feebles!

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:44 (twenty years ago) link

"defender" I know
but defense had nothing to
do with it. give in!

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:47 (twenty years ago) link

There is sooooo nothing appropriate whatsoever about Meet the Feebles. I couldn't have sex for a week after seeing that without the whale-on-kitty-cat scene popping into my mind. Ugh.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

the sodomy song is a definate turn on

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:51 (twenty years ago) link

Haha. I know, I felt all my testosterone leave my body just thinking about that movie.

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 17:51 (twenty years ago) link

ARGH I AM A JACKASS IGNORE THIS THREAD THX.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:15 (twenty years ago) link

whale-on-kitty-cat

Walrus.

"ARGH! And just when I was about to pop my cookies!"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:17 (twenty years ago) link

Well, when I have dates over... ha ha

I like movies that I've seen a million bajillion times, preferably comedies. Then you don't miss anything. It's comforting. But then again, I'd prefer not to have a movie on as it would be distracting.

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:21 (twenty years ago) link

In college, this boy and I watched World War II documentaries on PBS to turn him off, but we still ended up kissing.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:30 (twenty years ago) link

Episodes of Graham Norton were popular with another boy.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:39 (twenty years ago) link

logans run

― kephm, Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:48 (twenty years ago) link

i have a couple of tapes with old Quincy episodes that might work

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:50 (twenty years ago) link

Actually there IS that one scene in Kentucky Fried Movie...

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:54 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.cosmiccafe.com/barbarella.jpg

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:57 (twenty years ago) link

kephm spot on, brilliant choice every time

― BOX, Tuesday, 23 September 2003 18:58 (twenty years ago) link

johnny guitar worked for me, weirdly enough

― s1utsky (slutsky), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:18 (twenty years ago) link

I once went on a date to see A Clockwork Orange...suffice to say it did not put me in any sort of favorable mood.

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:27 (twenty years ago) link

worst date movie EVER: contempt

― s1utsky (slutsky), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:31 (twenty years ago) link

My video library = 'Maniac', 'Videodrome', 'Apocalypse Now', 'I Spit on Your Grave', and 'Salo'. Out of those, perhaps the last might be a good choice? (Chicks don't tend to, um, 'get into' 'Apocalypse' as much as I do, so that one's out)

― dave q, Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:42 (twenty years ago) link

Plus "I Spit..." might be too gory to inspire those warm squishy feelings.....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:45 (twenty years ago) link

But there is warm squishy carnage, it's all good.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:47 (twenty years ago) link

Plus it might inspire the ol' 'bubblebath' ploy!

― dave q, Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:52 (twenty years ago) link

short movies, very short. allow proper talking.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:56 (twenty years ago) link

'Crumb' has helped me to seduce myself on many a lonely night.

― Charlie Rose (Charlie Rose), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 19:59 (twenty years ago) link

Planet of the Apes or Room with a View of Me With So Much Makeup On You Can't Tell I'm An Ape. Both excellent choices.

http://images.usatoday.com/news/_photos/2001-07-22-apes2.jpg

― Helena Bonham-Carter, Tuesday, 23 September 2003 21:41 (twenty years ago) link

You mystery, you....I could kiss you for making me laugh!

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 21:47 (twenty years ago) link

Someone once played me Boogie Nights.

If I liked someone I'd actually really want to make them watch one of two or three of my favorite movies, though this would probably put them to sleep unless they were very cool.

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 01:59 (twenty years ago) link

films from woody allen's "serious" period are bad news too.

husbands and wives, for example, as i learned.

totally otm about the "secretary" suggestion tho -- of course it requires people of a certain sort.

one girl i dated mainly fell asleep to movies so i'd have to wake her up at the end.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 02:05 (twenty years ago) link

I usually put on Jackass when special boys come over. Nothing puts me in the mood like hott boys sticking toy cars up their butts or making piss snow cones.

Also Debbie Does Dallas is a gooder.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 04:13 (twenty years ago) link

scarface, obv. especially since it's now being re-released!

― Little Big Macher (llamasfur), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 04:22 (twenty years ago) link

but what about Debbie Does Dallas: The Next Generation?

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 05:26 (twenty years ago) link

Secretary.

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 05:36 (twenty years ago) link

God I despised amelie. if anyone put amelie on in my place, I'd throw them out saying 'get out of here you motherfucking dreamer'
and then I would go back and lie on my couch listening to John Lennon.
I would probably play Wayne's World 2, because it is funny.

― Nellie (nellskies), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 06:18 (twenty years ago) link

Do The Right Thing, obv.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 07:40 (twenty years ago) link

blood sucking freaks, or 1 of those italian cannibal movies

― duane, Wednesday, 24 September 2003 07:45 (twenty years ago) link

anything that reminds people of high school works for me - just remember how frustrated you were at the time, and whammo, instant seduction. search dazed & confused, or failing that, those drivers ed movies by HSF.

― Dave M. (rotten03), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 07:58 (twenty years ago) link

"Valley Girl"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 08:05 (twenty years ago) link

microcosmos:
minimal plot encourages conversation, nice photography, squishy slugs...

― petite verte (petite verte), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 15:09 (twenty years ago) link

One of the first scenes in DDD involves a woman with a caesarean scar. That's about the quickest way to make my blood pressure drop that I can think of that doesn't involve cold temperatures.

― Millarrrrr., Wednesday, 24 September 2003 15:12 (twenty years ago) link

Y Tu Mama Tambien

― Chris V. (Chris V), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 15:13 (twenty years ago) link

there's got to be a good complicity to get away with _wife to be sacrificed_.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 15:15 (twenty years ago) link

The Pillow Book

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 15:26 (twenty years ago) link

(shudder)

― s1utsky (slutsky), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 19:19 (twenty years ago) link

any Dario Argento flick

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 24 September 2003 19:40 (twenty years ago) link

I was going to say Grease and then I remembered it's the Grease SOUNDTRACK that works every time, for a certain age group anyway...

― Pete Scholtes, Thursday, 25 September 2003 15:58 (twenty years ago) link

Lost virginity to a French girl after: first 20 minutes of Dick Tracy.

Seduced woman of my dreams after: Babe

― Pete Scholtes, Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:01 (twenty years ago) link

The Grease soundtrack?! WTF!

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:12 (twenty years ago) link

I seriously don't understand the Amelie hate. Do you people have not even one ounce of lovelorn whimsy in your dark dead souls?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:13 (twenty years ago) link

That movie does not display "lovelorn whimsy" to me. It displays "obnoxious twee fettering about" to me. Sorry.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:15 (twenty years ago) link

(ha ha honestly the main reason I liked Amelie was cause it made me feel like I was on acid)

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:20 (twenty years ago) link

It displays "obnoxious twee fettering about"

And scary passive-agressive stalkery. "Oh, I'll go to great lengths to lead you around Paris, then decide I don't want you because I'm capricious like that".

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:21 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, wtf is that about? It reminded me of my ex-fiance, like if she went totally psycho and tried to kill someone at the end, I mean.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:22 (twenty years ago) link

I just found it really incredibly irritating; I don't like anything that tries to be cute. It's the equivalent of anyone using a baby voice ever. aww you poor widdle thing.
god i just typed that and it made me want to kill someone.

― Nellie (nellskies), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:55 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah! Nellie is OTM! It's definitely the cinematic equivalent of baby talk, good god.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:56 (twenty years ago) link

Watching Amelie is like calling your boyfriend Pooky or Daddy in a 5-year-old-girl voice, except for about 3 hours.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:56 (twenty years ago) link

My wife tried to seduce me to "Chicago". I did a little song and told her to wake me up tomorrow.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:57 (twenty years ago) link

Amelie: forced sense of wide-eyed wonder: Flaming Lips.

― David. (Cozen), Thursday, 25 September 2003 16:59 (twenty years ago) link

screw u guys amelie rox u r all dead inside

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:06 (twenty years ago) link

No one has mentioned "Bound"?? I have it fast-forwarded to the first seduction scene, all ready to go. And yes, it works (well, it "worked"). P.S. to nickalicious, I once got it on during Kentucky Fried Movie. Bad choice.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:07 (twenty years ago) link

Also: Amelie's haircut is ugly.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:07 (twenty years ago) link

(don't worry nick i like amelie too but i'm a twee fuck who only writes in small letters and tries to hide his heart of whimsy under an exterior of swearing and deliberate confusion)

― NA (Nick A.), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:09 (twenty years ago) link

But back to the subject at hand...

The only movie that's ever been playing when me & a ladyfriend were overcome with an urge to get goin' that I can remember was Harold and Maude, which makes me feel vaguely dirty in my soul.

x-post
(ha ha twee Nicks unite!)

And actually Jeanne, I could see how KY Fried Movie would be a bad choice, but that scene near the end with the couple watching the news...I dunno, it seemed RIGHT.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:11 (twenty years ago) link

http://photos.friendster.com/photos/41/27/357214/632519122068l.jpg

― David. (Cozen), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:12 (twenty years ago) link

I really wish I didn't add in the David Lynch bit. It's a touch too much, I think. Nightmares, otherwise.

― David. (Cozen), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:13 (twenty years ago) link

Actually, that doesn't begin to describe it. Your version looks a lot, lot better than the version actually put on screen. "Woo! Look at me! I'm Audrey Tatou! Watch me walk around with crap hair making a really dumb face for three hours! Woo hoo!" I wish that woman so much harm for wasting that precious time in my life. It wasn't as bad as the time I had to watch Waking Life but it was pretty bad. I kept hoping Al Pacino would show up and machine gun the bitch, but no.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:16 (twenty years ago) link

I'm like actually personally insulted by Amelie, to be honest.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:17 (twenty years ago) link

David Lynch directed the Twee-est Film of All Time y'know. Released by Disney of all things. The Straight Story. Ain't nobody ever getting any sweet lovin' putting THAT movie on.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:18 (twenty years ago) link

or yell out "whoo-waa" and then bend her over.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:19 (twenty years ago) link

Yes, you are. WTF else are you supposed to do while watching The Straight Story? Certainly not actually watch The Straight Story.

(FYI while TSS is kind of boring and something one can watch, like, once, it is nowhere near Amelie in terms of being "twee-est film ever". For one, Richard Farnsworth does not drive around the entire film with an expression on his face that makes him look like he got beat with a frying pan wielded by Belle & Fucking Sebastian)

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:20 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha ha ha

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:22 (twenty years ago) link

I mean, listen, for serious, the expression Audrey Tatou chooses to wield the entirety of that film reminds me of my cousin. He also walks around with the same look on his face all the time. HE IS LIVING IN A MENTAL INSTITUTION. I am not making this up. He is severely brain damaged and not allowed out in public unsupervised. Somehow, this severely deranged expression is meant to represent "romantic whimsy", at least I guess to French people and indie kids. It makes me want to stab myself in the chest.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:22 (twenty years ago) link

I really have personal issues with that movie. I'll stop now. I'm not making it up though, it seriously creeped me out because A) Amelie's "romantic whimsy" behavior reminded me of my ex on his "good" medication days B) her expression looks like my severely brain damaged cousin. WTF!!! It's a movie apparently based entirely on people I know with no mental capacity whatsoever!!! Arrrrgh.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:23 (twenty years ago) link

my review of Amelie was "charming", used the way one would review wine (i.e. slightly dismissive).

I saw it with my long game who immediately declared it the best movie she'd ever seen. I really hope that had to with how much Paris was in it and not anything else.

WTF else are you supposed to do while watching The Straight Story? Certainly not actually watch The Straight Story.

cornfields r hott.

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:25 (twenty years ago) link

I just thought it was sweet. The expression on the main character's face /= the entire gist of the film, is it?

(I'm sorry I'll stop now. It's just this film reminded me of my own life, which prob'ly = nick is a depressing/depressed passive-aggressive borderline psychopath twee lovegoblin.)

ha ha dual-"I'll stop now" x-post action!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:25 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha I just remembered the last time I watched The Virgin Suicides with my ex we ended up making out all the way through it

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:29 (twenty years ago) link

All I'm saying is that anyone who is trying to make the sex with me better not let me even think they're going to put that movie on, cos I'll go bitchcakes, and also no sex will be made. One of the fastest ways to freak me out ever!

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:31 (twenty years ago) link

Ally, your Amelie-directed vitriol is delightful.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Thursday, 25 September 2003 17:40 (twenty years ago) link

the poster for Amelie is enough to send me into fits of rage.

oh no! movie of the year! OH NO!

― (Jon L), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:25 (twenty years ago) link

I can't believe I actually ranted about Amelie for that amount of time! I'm glad it brightens days, though.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:30 (twenty years ago) link

what about if we switch around the question? what movie could your date play for me that would YOU totally want to jump their bones n' shit?

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:33 (twenty years ago) link

"If you play this movie for Kingfish, I will screw you into next week."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:37 (twenty years ago) link

Battle Royal is very romantic. Killing is wrong though.

― (Jon L), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:38 (twenty years ago) link

oops. that, of course, should have read:

what movie could your date play for YOU that would make you totally want to jump their bones n' shit?

there. thinking is tough.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:40 (twenty years ago) link

Ally your rants were all on-target, I congratulate you.

― s1utsky (slutsky), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:44 (twenty years ago) link

I want to see Amelie now.

Better a movie that provoked some reaction rather than none at all.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:46 (twenty years ago) link

Yes, that's normally what I think too, but when my reaction is severely suicidal thoughts at the absolute despair of realizing that this is what humanity has brought forth, then I think that's a horrible movie!

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:47 (twenty years ago) link

why not watch a movie that provoked a good reaction then?

(xp)

― s1utsky (slutsky), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:49 (twenty years ago) link

Bambi and Benji have already been taken.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:51 (twenty years ago) link

HOLY SHIT THE ANSWER TO THREAD QUESTION IS TAMPOPO!!!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 18:54 (twenty years ago) link

i liked amelie but using it to try to have sex w/ someone = the creepy harmless cardigan sweater of come-ons

people aren't talking about clash of the titans enough

― jones (actual), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:02 (twenty years ago) link

If Tampopo's egg scene doesn't turn you on I suspect your genitalia may be defective.
http://www.jhu.edu/~gazette/2000/may0100/images/01page8.gif

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:11 (twenty years ago) link

Or my brain just hadn't clicked on to the seduction

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:12 (twenty years ago) link

Or maybe you don't find eggs very sexy.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:17 (twenty years ago) link

Phil understands the sexy that is the egg scene.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:19 (twenty years ago) link

STOP RUINING SEXY

― David. (Cozen), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:21 (twenty years ago) link

My parents had this old Rolling Stone that a friend of theirs had written an article in, and there was an interview with Steve Martin and he tells this story about hanging out with Jackie Onassis and her being really crude and putting fried eggs on her breasts. Now that's hottt.

― NA (Nick A.), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:22 (twenty years ago) link

that makes me feel funny

― s1utsky (slutsky), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:26 (twenty years ago) link

Like when you used to climb the rope in gym class?

― NA (Nick A.), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:28 (twenty years ago) link

I think what Nick is saying, between this and the surveillance thread, is that if someone covered themselves with pudding and eggs, he'd be like putty in their hands.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:28 (twenty years ago) link

Ally you are confused. It is the eunuchs you have a weakness for pudding. Last time I checked, I wasn't a eunuch. I'm going to go double check now though. I'll let you know in a minute.

― NA (Nick A.), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:33 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha "you nick" ha ha

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:35 (twenty years ago) link

So what's the difference between a eunuch and a castrato again? I'm just asking. No real reason.

― NA (Nick A.), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:37 (twenty years ago) link

one of them sings for Radiohead, the other for Sigur Ros.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:42 (twenty years ago) link

Hate is good.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:47 (twenty years ago) link

All I'm saying is that it seems suspicious that you know so much about this pudding thing, NA.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 19:59 (twenty years ago) link

''Amelie: forced sense of wide-eyed wonder: Flaming Lips.''

that sounds like nabisco: stop it or i'll kill ya!!!

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Thursday, 25 September 2003 20:27 (twenty years ago) link

Love and Death = all the good ideas shelled out in the first ten minutes followed by slapstick w/ sudden bursts of Prokofiev = every date I ever had.

― Altweibersommermute (Wintermute), Thursday, 25 September 2003 20:34 (twenty years ago) link

I think what Nick is saying, between this and the surveillance thread, is that if someone covered themselves with pudding and eggs, he'd be like putty in their hands.

He'd have mucho company. Lots of people enjoy "sploshing"---with a Brit mag deadicated to it. (Don't see the sexiness of sitting on a cream pie, but that's just me.)

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 21:28 (twenty years ago) link

ARGH NICHOLE I had put that episode of "Real Sex" completely out of my mind UNTIL NOW AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 25 September 2003 21:35 (twenty years ago) link

(evil chuckle) The destruction of Perry's mind is now complete....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 21:37 (twenty years ago) link

I think I've said this before, but in college my friends made fun of me for making all these boys watch Porky's. It was my seduction movie. Although, I just thought there were too many boys in American who had never seen it before.

― Carey (Carey), Thursday, 25 September 2003 21:46 (twenty years ago) link

"WHEN I SEE A PIE, I JUST WANT TO PUT MY ASS ON IT"

--Clown Sex Woman, Real Sex

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 25 September 2003 22:28 (twenty years ago) link

I am DEEPLY impressed -- anyone able to skeeve out Dan is a master of language and control. I long for the day when Dan and Nichole meet in real life and in a few sentences she reduces him to jelly.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 25 September 2003 23:12 (twenty years ago) link

Ally's comments on this thread are the only thing that's ever made me want to see Amelie!

― Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 23:22 (twenty years ago) link

Ally - I object to your Amelie hatin' double standard! If you get to crush on Jimmy Fallon and Lloyd Dobbler (two of the hugest indie crushes EVER), us schminide boys get Audrey Tautou.

Forced wide eyed optimism >>>>>>>>> boring retread cynicism

― bnw (bnw), Thursday, 25 September 2003 23:26 (twenty years ago) link

I am DEEPLY impressed -- anyone able to skeeve out Dan is a master of language and control.

bow Comes from years of practice.

I long for the day when Dan and Nichole meet in real life and in a few sentences she reduces him to jelly.

Tis one of my goals for my first Boston FAP. However, he could deny it all without a video camera running.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 25 September 2003 23:57 (twenty years ago) link

OK correct me if I'm wrong but Lloyd Dobbler does not wander around with the same jerk ass expression as Amelie, and also their behaviors are nothing similar. I cannot say the same for Jimmy Fallon, he might well be a crazy ass stalker type. I really don't know.

I mean, honestly bnw, if you want to get me on a double standard vis a vis tweeness, you should really do better by pointing out that I'm walking around with fucking barrettes on either side of my head and I wear Weezer glasses and knee socks, come on. I was actually thinking just 15 minutes ago, how can I make fun of Amelie's twee hair when I look like this?

― Ally (mlescaut), Friday, 26 September 2003 01:10 (twenty years ago) link

I have never understood the appeal of Lloyd Dobbler.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 26 September 2003 01:25 (twenty years ago) link

I'm walking around with fucking barrettes on either side of my head and I wear Weezer glasses and knee sock

Ally gives birth to a thousand corny indie erections.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Friday, 26 September 2003 01:28 (twenty years ago) link

Ahh...the source of ILM's "corny indie fucks."

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 26 September 2003 01:43 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.splosh.co.uk/home.htm

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 26 September 2003 02:28 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.eros-guide.com/articles/2002-10-23/beddingbozo/

VIOLENT J REPRAZENT!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 26 September 2003 02:32 (twenty years ago) link

This whole thread amuses me.

I have absolutely nothing to offer considering I've never been seduced nor have I ever endeavored to seduce anyone, but I just want to say that this whole thread amuses me. Just that.

― Legendary Nothingness (Dee the Lurker), Friday, 26 September 2003 02:36 (twenty years ago) link

"From Hell"

― Mary (Mary), Friday, 26 September 2003 08:11 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha I just remembered the last time I watched The Virgin Suicides with my ex we ended up making out all the way through it

I knew you had a little Trip Fontaine in you. I'm hoping before you made out you called her a "stone fox".

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 26 September 2003 10:29 (twenty years ago) link

"I knew you had a little Trip Fontaine in you."

!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 26 September 2003 11:51 (twenty years ago) link

"From Hell" was a bad movie for me :(

― Ally (mlescaut), Friday, 26 September 2003 12:04 (twenty years ago) link

What is this about pudding? What flavor? Does it matter?

I like Amelie too. But I thought Audrey did a better job as a more normal person in L'Auberge Espagnole.

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Friday, 26 September 2003 12:07 (twenty years ago) link

Me too, I don't think she's a bad actress, and I liked that movie 1000000000x more.

― s1utsky (slutsky), Friday, 26 September 2003 13:26 (twenty years ago) link

Nick Fontaine

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 26 September 2003 13:28 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.canalcine.net/imagenes/virgenes2.JPG

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 26 September 2003 13:29 (twenty years ago) link

"Unfaithful"

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 26 September 2003 14:18 (twenty years ago) link

Amelie=freaky narcissist-fest, deeply worrying, borderline racist and 100% unsexual. Surely.
Seduction movie: too much a movie geek to get distracted but 'Before Sunrise' is romantic and clever and funny.

― Enrique (Enrique), Friday, 26 September 2003 14:24 (twenty years ago) link

From atechnical standpoint, Unfaithful is quite striking... that said...

― ModJ, Friday, 26 September 2003 14:38 (twenty years ago) link

haha "The Fast and the Furious" !

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Friday, 26 September 2003 14:39 (twenty years ago) link

For me too Ally; I really just wanted to watch the movie.

― Mary (Mary), Friday, 26 September 2003 16:13 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha I need hair like that

I'm seriously gonna whisper "you're a stone fox" in somebody's ear before the sun has set on this day. MARK MY WORDS!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 26 September 2003 16:32 (twenty years ago) link

The thing about "From Hell" isn't that it is a bad movie, it is a very good movie, but it made me really upset. Though I guess it means that I'd want to turn it off faster and then have sex instead???

― Ally (mlescaut), Friday, 26 September 2003 16:35 (twenty years ago) link

The dude in that picture looks like Lilly Taylor. God, I love her...

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Friday, 26 September 2003 16:53 (twenty years ago) link

Actually, Sarah and I wanted to have a band called Stone Fox at some point, I wonder what happened to that. It would have to be a glam rock band, obviously.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 26 September 2003 17:06 (twenty years ago) link

There WAS a band named Stone Fox -- hot rock n roll chicks from San Fran that included Janis Tanaka (L7, Pink, Fireball Ministry).

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Friday, 26 September 2003 17:35 (twenty years ago) link

Dammit.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 26 September 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

There's a band in Austin named Trip Fontaine.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Friday, 26 September 2003 18:30 (twenty years ago) link

four months pass...

Sirens.

...uhm... bump...

― PVC (peeveecee), Friday, 13 February 2004 17:42 (twenty years ago) link

if you're trying to avoid sex, "chuck and buck" will surely do the trick.
"I imagine something like All the Real Girls would put someone more in the state of mind to fall in love (see my thread on it & bnw's comment)."
i don't know. it seems like a very makeout inducing movie to me, and once you get going, you can just turn the movie off and "let the night take you where it chooses"

― Felonious Drunk (Felcher), Friday, 13 February 2004 18:16 (twenty years ago) link

i just got this movie last night as a valentines gift from my wife! we've already seen it and loved it.

― Chris V (Chris V), Friday, 13 February 2004 18:17 (twenty years ago) link

Gotta be Full Metal Jacket. It'll impress the pants right off her. (or him)

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Friday, 13 February 2004 18:21 (twenty years ago) link

The Dreamers.

― dean! (deangulberry), Friday, 13 February 2004 18:31 (twenty years ago) link

seven months pass...

...

― amateur!!st, Friday, 17 September 2004 17:37 (nineteen years ago) link

My friend's boyfriend made her watch Caligula once, then tried to get the snuggles in. It didn't work.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Friday, 17 September 2004 17:59 (nineteen years ago) link

"Henry and June" has unexpectedly worked for me before.

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:02 (nineteen years ago) link

'the snapper' once worked for me

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:02 (nineteen years ago) link

also 'the little mermaid'

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:03 (nineteen years ago) link

That works when I'm by myself. Oh, Ursula!

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:04 (nineteen years ago) link

WHERE IS A SERIOUS GIRL, WHO REALLY WOULD BE SEDUCED IF I PUT "BADLANDS" IN THE DVD PLAYER?

― amateur!!st, Friday, 17 September 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

For some reason, "Dogfight" works remarkably well for this.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

"Quills" can also be a mood-killer, or it can be kind of enticing.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Roxy Music/Bryan Ferry video collection - it's easier than explaining myself.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:06 (nineteen years ago) link

Also, it's very good.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:06 (nineteen years ago) link

"Dogfight," I mean.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:06 (nineteen years ago) link

mulholland drive.

― kelsey (kelstarry), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:30 (nineteen years ago) link

mmm... yum. Why does lesbian sex work so well? What does this say about the girls I date?

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:32 (nineteen years ago) link

when i was in high school i took a girl to see 'colors'

needless to say, our relationship went nowhere

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:33 (nineteen years ago) link

"The Fisher King" does not work.

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:33 (nineteen years ago) link

Ew... a hairy Robin Williams doing a three-minute bit about taking a crap. No, that wouldn't work, would it?

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:34 (nineteen years ago) link

i can't wait to try out 'endless sunshine...'

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:35 (nineteen years ago) link

yeah duh robin williams is an enlimpener if ever there was one

― jones (actual), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:39 (nineteen years ago) link

i'm tellin you fools Clash Of The Titans!! you've got to get the fuckin KRACKEN on the case

― jones (actual), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:40 (nineteen years ago) link

I don't remember kraken-fucking in "Clash Of The Titans"!

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Trouble in Paradise (worked on me)

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:44 (nineteen years ago) link

OMG I was actually searching for this thread like three weeks ago and couldn't find it.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:46 (nineteen years ago) link

The same girl that I seduced while watching Valley Girl - or maybe she seduced me, can you ever really tell? - well, this girl, we went to the local video store which was on 46th and.. 8th? i can't even rememebr the name of it now but maybe it's still there. it was an AMAZING video store. if you liked bizarre vintage tv shows and porn kung fu, and like every single Russ Myers flick. i mean, it was the classic ultimate movie geek's dream. I wasn't a movie geek so I was wary. i mean when there are 117 videocassettes bunched together in the corner labelled "something-or-other" #1-#117 in identical cases and xeroxed labels you can feel sort of lost. so i went for "Man Bites Dog." WHICH I HAD ALREADY SEEN BEFORE. WTF. She couldn't take it any more loooong before the scene which actually does go way over the top.

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:48 (nineteen years ago) link

sorry did i say "porn kung fu" ?? i wish i had meant that.

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:49 (nineteen years ago) link

For some reason "porn kung fu" sounds more appealing than "kung fu porn".

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:51 (nineteen years ago) link

Naked Lunch (didn't work on me)

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:55 (nineteen years ago) link

Shit it's killing me that I can't remember the name of this store. I think it must have been on 9th because 9th Avenue was cooler. There wa a porn store in front, which was connected, but to go to the non-porn part you walked off the avenue and around to the street side, like ten feet from the northwest corner. there was a pink awning, and then there were stairs... leading down....

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:56 (nineteen years ago) link

Super Mario Brothers

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 17 September 2004 18:58 (nineteen years ago) link

Best date movie: Y Tu Mama Tambien. If you don't get some action after this movie, there is no hope and you should forget it.

Worst: Rosemary's Baby.

― shookout (shookout), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Hannibal does not work.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:14 (nineteen years ago) link

my dad took his mom to see Psycho. No joke.

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Also avoid Neil LaBute movies.

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:30 (nineteen years ago) link

Your dad was trying to seduce his mom???????

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:31 (nineteen years ago) link

was it a seduction attempt?

xpost!

― lauren (laurenp), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:31 (nineteen years ago) link

Well no, but you can see how it would be uncomfortable. On top of you know, the killing and stabbing and the killing and the stabbing. Haha this is the same woman who actually rates the movies she sees by how few curse words they have in them.

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:38 (nineteen years ago) link

I once (when I was like, 18) watched "Threesome" with some dude and ended up getting it on with him later that night. What a LAME THING TO DO.

― Towelette Pettatucci (Homosexual II), Friday, 17 September 2004 19:56 (nineteen years ago) link

how about

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me - Classic or Dud [spoilers]

― amateur!!st, Friday, 17 September 2004 19:58 (nineteen years ago) link

oh also i have still not seen the matrix

― amateur!!st, Friday, 17 September 2004 19:58 (nineteen years ago) link

Then you could have Matrix-sex.

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/lists/titler.html

― Tonight at ten (kenan), Friday, 17 September 2004 20:01 (nineteen years ago) link

one year passes...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This was the thread with the splosh reference on it! Wow.

― Young Fresh Danny D (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 12:51 (seventeen years ago) link

This thread is embarassing. The only thing I like about Amelie anymore is that part where she imagines all the people in the city fucking at the same time or whatever.

And Battle Royale is a very romantic movie.

― a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar (nickalici, Tuesday, 12 September 2006 13:02 (seventeen years ago) link

I still like "Amelie" just fine 3 years later.

Oh, and "Play Misty for Me" is my pick.

― Tiki Theater Xymposium (Bent Over at the Arclight), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 13:13 (seventeen years ago) link

Stone monkey took a girl to see the accused! WTF!

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 13:36 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm ashamed to say I was once seduced while watching Raising Cain.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 14:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Betty Blue?

The twenty minute rule applies.

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 14:12 (seventeen years ago) link

Fletch or Fletch Lives - works every time!

― JohnFoxxsJuno (JohnFoxxsJuno), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 14:32 (seventeen years ago) link

Dudes is there any way I can take back that American Psycho thing? I still can't believe that.

― Allyzay is cool: with Blue n White, with Eli Manning, with NY Giants (allyzay), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 14:58 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm kind of really disturbed someone else said "Chuck and Buck." Man that was a bad choice.

― Eppy (Eppy), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:07 (seventeen years ago) link

you want something magnanimous and cosmic to make any actions seem inconsequential - should also be funny and lusty to get the juices flowing. underground comes to mind - especially if you close the deal during the opening bombs, music, booze and sex scene.

ultimate so no gonna happen movie - kids!

― jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:08 (seventeen years ago) link

if you're trying to avoid sex, "chuck and buck" will surely do the trick.

― jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:09 (seventeen years ago) link

As will 'Withnail and I'.

― M. White (Miguelito), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:10 (seventeen years ago) link

Chasing Amy; just last night.
I don't know how I got away with this.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:12 (seventeen years ago) link

Boxing Helena cwould be a good choice!

Seriously though, The Pillow Book wi yer man Ewan McGregor.

― JohnFoxxsJuno (JohnFoxxsJuno), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:21 (seventeen years ago) link

A Bout de Souffle.

The bedroom scene should provide enough time to get the hormones slowly a-bubblin'...

― JTS (JTS), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:24 (seventeen years ago) link

I was totally seduced by 'you've got mail'

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:32 (seventeen years ago) link

i could have sworn that i posted on this thread a couple of years ago. but anyway, blue velvet.

― t0dd swiss (immobilisme), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:37 (seventeen years ago) link

http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/B0002MFG3W.01._AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:39 (seventeen years ago) link

Porky's

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:44 (seventeen years ago) link

The answer really depends on the date.

― M. White (Miguelito), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:44 (seventeen years ago) link

SCI-FI & SODOMY

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:46 (seventeen years ago) link

Gotta be Full Metal Jacket. It'll impress the pants right off her. (or him)

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:46 (seventeen years ago) link

wtf

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:46 (seventeen years ago) link

I miss Helena Bonham Carter, my favorite celebrity ilxor.

― a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar (nickalici, Tuesday, 12 September 2006 15:58 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm certain I will regret this the moment I click submit, but...

LISTED IN ORDER OF HIGHEST TO LOWEST BASE ACHIEVED DURING:

Harold & Maude (possible conception)
Bubbleboy (handjob)
The Adventures of Buckaroo Bonzai Across the 8th Dimensions (feel copped)
Office Space (vigorous makeout)
scratchy VHS Tape of Tom Waits Live Austin City Limits 1978 (makeout)
2001: A Space Odyssey (passed out by the 5 minute mark)

― a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar (nickalici, Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:13 (seventeen years ago) link

Why would you even keep track of this?!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:22 (seventeen years ago) link

haha, yeah, I've got a running spreadsheet

― a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar (nickalici, Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:26 (seventeen years ago) link

How could you have torn yourself away from Bubbleboy that long??????

― Allyzay is cool: with Blue n White, with Eli Manning, with NY Giants (allyzay), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:28 (seventeen years ago) link

Bubbleboy is kind of one of the best movies ever, isn't it?

― a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar (nickalici, Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:35 (seventeen years ago) link

The scene where he thinks he died is pretty inexplicable.

― Allyzay is cool: with Blue n White, with Eli Manning, with NY Giants (allyzay), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:40 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.philipglass.com/images/films/koyaanisqatsi_f.jpg

― Really cool, wickedly cool, cooly cool bon apetit! (ex machina), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 16:49 (seventeen years ago) link

i have seen the matrix, finally.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 17:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Stone monkey took a girl to see the accused! WTF!

I have been roffling a this all day.

― Young Fresh Danny D (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 17:10 (seventeen years ago) link

(And my friend, after informing me he's never actually done this, told me he'd put on Schindler's List)

Right now, on Paramount, I'm watching the Seinfeld where Jerry is caught by Newman making out in the cinema to Schindler's List.

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 18:44 (seventeen years ago) link

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